Why I still hate Snevans, now more than ever.
This post contains spoilers for "Deathly Hallows"
JK got me and got me good. Not just because she canonized a form of Snevans, but because she tricked me. Or maybe I tricked me.
To me, Snevans means Snape's unrequited love for Lily. And that's mostly what it turned out to be, although it's actually much worse than I had imagined. What she gave us was more complicated. They were friends according to little Lily, and yet young Snape seems to think he had found his life partner in the red haired witch. This shows the saddest part of Snape, the desperation for acceptance and sameness. The endless aching need filled by Death Eaters. Severus' dark nature, be it inborn or acquired or both, was completely alien to Lily. She, from a comfortable, loving, middle class home, was unable to see what would cause a person to be defensive, empty and angry. This is an understandable excuse for a child, but as she grew, she did not seem to care about finding out about Severus' internal life. Were they ever really friends? I think the answer is no, not really. Severus spent his life loving someone he could never have. It happens all to frequently in real life as well.
How did I trick me? You may remember that between "HBP" and "DH", it was revealed that the fact that Severus loved someone was not as important as that he was loved by someone. JK had done such a good job of selling him as unloveable that I figured it must be his mother that she's referring to. Let me tell you that I was ashamed when I realized I had bought the lie, hook, line and sinker. Me, of all people, who should know better, who loves Severus so dearly, could not see that anyone in the books ever would. Perhaps it was my own bitterness, injecting too much of myself into what I read, that led me astray. Perhaps it was simply wanting to spare Severus the pain of unrequited love that blinded me. I knew JK's writer's tricks, dodging questions and giving only half answers, but I missed a few. Perhaps that is to her credit. I still believe she does not know the scope of what she has written when it comes to Snape, and I still think she's asking us to suspend far too much disbelief when it comes to Lily and James as a couple. if James and Lily are the wizarding world norm, then Severus definitly deserves better.
I have more to say, but I feel as if I have spilled myself out completely and have no more to give right now. Comments and questions are welcome, as is running away from the nutter that is me. :)
JK got me and got me good. Not just because she canonized a form of Snevans, but because she tricked me. Or maybe I tricked me.
To me, Snevans means Snape's unrequited love for Lily. And that's mostly what it turned out to be, although it's actually much worse than I had imagined. What she gave us was more complicated. They were friends according to little Lily, and yet young Snape seems to think he had found his life partner in the red haired witch. This shows the saddest part of Snape, the desperation for acceptance and sameness. The endless aching need filled by Death Eaters. Severus' dark nature, be it inborn or acquired or both, was completely alien to Lily. She, from a comfortable, loving, middle class home, was unable to see what would cause a person to be defensive, empty and angry. This is an understandable excuse for a child, but as she grew, she did not seem to care about finding out about Severus' internal life. Were they ever really friends? I think the answer is no, not really. Severus spent his life loving someone he could never have. It happens all to frequently in real life as well.
How did I trick me? You may remember that between "HBP" and "DH", it was revealed that the fact that Severus loved someone was not as important as that he was loved by someone. JK had done such a good job of selling him as unloveable that I figured it must be his mother that she's referring to. Let me tell you that I was ashamed when I realized I had bought the lie, hook, line and sinker. Me, of all people, who should know better, who loves Severus so dearly, could not see that anyone in the books ever would. Perhaps it was my own bitterness, injecting too much of myself into what I read, that led me astray. Perhaps it was simply wanting to spare Severus the pain of unrequited love that blinded me. I knew JK's writer's tricks, dodging questions and giving only half answers, but I missed a few. Perhaps that is to her credit. I still believe she does not know the scope of what she has written when it comes to Snape, and I still think she's asking us to suspend far too much disbelief when it comes to Lily and James as a couple. if James and Lily are the wizarding world norm, then Severus definitly deserves better.
I have more to say, but I feel as if I have spilled myself out completely and have no more to give right now. Comments and questions are welcome, as is running away from the nutter that is me. :)