2009 fic

Jan 01, 2010 15:19

my list from 2008, when i wrote much more fic.

stories i wrote in 2009:

panic at the disco

The birthday special - brendon/spencer for last year's popoffacork (published 12/31/08, but not included in last year's roundup)
Transcript [coda to The birthday special] - brendon/spencer
a year in the mouth of a whale (a eulogy of sorts) - not fic but it seems to belong here. it's what i wrote instead of panic-gets-divorced story.

american idol

a pair of almost-but-not-quite stories set in the final weeks of the season:
Way down inside - kris/adam
Never find nobody - adam/kris, adam/brad

a pair of maybe-what-if-we stories set on summer idol tour:
That guy - kris/adam, kris/katy
It takes two [incomplete] - adam/various, adam/kris

a missing scene from disarm_d's More - adam/brendon



Leitmotif of the year: i wrote less fic, but i want to say it felt a bit more serious -- funny moments within, sure, but more fundamentally serious stories about big questions or moments of confusion. though i'm not sure anyone would really characterize me as a comic to begin with. the stories don't, though, dwell much on the question of sexual identity -- or at least in naming it.

My best/favourite story this year: definitely the birthday special, which is in my favorite stories of any kind in any form i've ever written ever. it was a challenge fic assignment, which was great in that it allowed me to do something i'd up to then considered a little self-indulgent or repetitive (band futurefic). i'd somehow written a lot of panic stories without ever outright tackling brendon/spencer but to me the pairing has a more lasting, later-in-life quality to it (especially now after the split) that it also felt like a good end to writing that fandom. that was hardly the intention at the time but i'm happy with it as the cap.

Most popular story this year: via delicious and comments and recs i saw, this is definitely The birthday special and, for idolfic, That guy.

Most underappreciated story, imho: two stories that to me were very similar -- about kris and adam each in their own pov navigating a confusing, overwhelming couple of weeks -- had drastically different levels of response. i mean, people liked them both, but Never find nobody, the adampov take on it, was about half as saved on delicious and commented on in lj as Way down inside, the krispov version. i don't think one is drastically better/worse-written than the other, but i do think -- especially at the beginning of this fandom -- there was a real bias/preference for stories/discussion about kris-discovers-his-queerness over adam-is-truefax-queer.

Single sexiest moment: hmm. i think in The birthday special after brendon cockblocks spencer and the chef:

In the hallway between bedrooms Brendon pins Spencer face first to the wall and shoves three fingers in his mouth. "Suck," he says, biting Spencer's earlobe, and Spencer arches his back until Brendon's cock is snug against his ass. Brendon cups his other hand over Spencer's zipper and Spencer comes in his pants.

there's a fair amount of sex in this story, most more extended than that, but i like the urgency of it, the possessiveness. and that spencer's caught off guard again (accident!) even though he was kind of asking for it.

Most "holy crap, that's wrong, even for you" story: not a story, but including even a vague reference to a lindsay lohan/samantha ronson/matt giraud hook-up (in le menage marmont, part of It takes two) is probably is the best answer i have here.

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: so much of The birthday special was, for me, about brendon not having someone who really believed in him, who fully thought and told him he was gifted at what he does. there was a lot more of that kind of fic post-split, but at the time i was obsessed with some things ryan had said when pretty. odd. came out that seemed to trivialize brendon's songwriting. and brendon's songs on that album were, in some ways, trivial, as if brendon himself couldn't let himself take them seriously. there's a little of that in last year's Scenes from a marriage but it was while writing this one that i started to see/think more about brendon's self-esteem, i guess you could say. that and the ongoing idea of why brendon has to make a joke of everything -- in transcript, i have him say: I know I'm really shitty at taking things seriously sometimes but it's not because I don't want to, it's just that I don't -- I'm, like, a recovering class clown.

Hardest story to write: the reason i didn't finish It takes two was i just couldn't, despite months and months of trying, ever figure out how to get adam and kris into bed together in this time period. and then tour was over and so many other things had happened with adam that the whole thing felt outdated.

Biggest surprise: to me? when i first thought of this line: "Oh Spencer," he says around a yawn. "You're always my favorite fuck of the year." i knew it was the key to the whole story. but i didn't know until i finished writing the scene that spencer wouldn't be angry about it: Spencer laughs, short and surprised, and listens as Brendon's breaths fade into a soft snore. he's not unhappy or angsty about their arrangement, not at first, not even when he maybe should be. but it gave them a different kind of basis around which to build something more serious. he hasn't been pining away all these years. he's been reevaluating. (and being ruined for sex with other people, clearly.)

Most unintentionally telling story: probably Transcript. both in the way it asks questions and how much it reveals what i thought about panic's way of working together in the past.

Favourite opening line: Accidents, Spencer's always said, are what happen when you stop paying attention. that was where The birthday special started in my head, this idea of spencer having gotten so lost in his previously impeccably planned life.

i was also really fond of this, from my brendon/adam snippet for disarm_d: There's no way he'll be able to make this funny at brunch.

Favourite closing line: "You're okay," he says against Kris' ear. this meme doesn't ask my favorite line from the middle of a story, but a top pick for that would actually be from just earlier in Way down inside, when kris' reaction to badly, barely kissing adam is not to move away but to hide his face in Adam's throat, cheeks burning. that was just about all i wanted to say about the two of them, that even when most overwhelmed they weren't pushing each other away.

Unwritten but intended for next year: hmm, i honestly don't know what or how much i'll write fic in 2010, as i'm trying to really focus on another writing project. i don't have any standing WIPs. i might write that sherlock holmes story i posted about. i keep thinking eventually i'll write a gossip girl fic. maybe some white collar when it comes back. i have half an idea for a story about how adam keeps falling for these twink boyfriends he thinks can become husbands and in the end comes back to kris, who was more of a husband all along than any of the boy toys. i haven't written a really long, thoughtful story since i started working on The birthday special, more than a year ago, and i suspect my fic will be more one-off or fleeting in 2010 as well. i might continue my lazy trend of just making posts about stories i'm not going to write all the way out, in which case my apologies in advance for being such a damned tease.

pop quiz, fic

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