(no subject)
Title: Sheppard and His Precious
Author: weasleysangel
Pairing: Sheppard/? Sheppard/McKay implied
Rating: PG
Summary: Sheppard has a Stargate fetish and it’s all Rodney’s fault.
WARNING!: This fic may contain inapropriat use of a stargate read with caution.
Lt. Colonel John Sheppard had never in his life seen anything as beautiful as the thing in front of him; it was huge and shiny and round and he wanted it for his own he wanted to... to.. Well he didn’t quite know what he wanted to do with it yet but he was sure he was now claiming it as his.
“Mine! Mine, mine, mine!” John chants to himself as he gets to know his new shiny ring better. “My precious.”
John didn't let the screaming and shouting faze him as he lavished his love on his big, round jewel ignoring his surroundings.
“COLONEL, STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!” Rodney McKay squawked as he watched his team leader hump the Stargate like an over excited puppy
One of the natives that was now pointing a spear at Sheppard and his team said, “This man has desecrated our sacred ring he must be punished!”
“Sheppard only you would be able to get arrested for molesting a Stargate!” Rodney yelled at the oblivious colonel he looked over at Teyla and Ronon who both had equal looks of bewilderment on their faces.
Several of the natives around them went up the stairs to the Stargate and proceeded to try to extract the Colonel from his newfound girlfriend.
Sheppard kicked and screamed as he was dragged off of the Stargate by two burly half-dressed men “No! MINE! YOU CAN”T HAVE IT! IT IS MINE! I FOUND IT FIRST! MY PRECIOUS! I WILL BE BACK, I PROMISE!”
“Hey! Be careful with him - we need him!” Rodney yelled as he followed closely behind the burly men and a wildly protesting John.
As they entered the village John’s hysteria subsided rapidly replaced by embarrassment and confusion. The two burly men finished pulling John in to the temple and threw John on to the ground. Both of the big men were unfazed by the deadly glare thrown at them by Rodney.
Rodney looked over at the Colonel who was now thoroughly glaring at him
“McKay I told you not to touch anything but no you just had to touch it anyways,” John said his voice soft but filled with anger.
“WHAT! How was I supposed to know it would bring out your inner fetish for the Stargate?” Rodney said glaring back but the statement only got him smack on the back of the head. “Ow!”
Both men froze as they saw they had an audience, aside from the sasquatches standing at the temple door there was a woman, she was quite ugly in the face, but her clothing indicated that she was of significance to the village, and was standing at the other end of the temple’s single long room.
“It has come to my attention that you have dishonored our sacred ring,” the woman said.
“Umm...”
“You see…”
“About that…” Sheppard and McKay tried to explain.
“SILENCE!” the woman yelled effectively silencing both the men. “You are to be punished for your actions. You,” she said pointing at Sheppard, “for your heinous act, and you,” she continued pointing to McKay, “for being the cause of the grave dishonor.”
The two men looked at each other then back at the woman, the same thoughts of doom flowing through their heads.
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Rodney and John walked shakily out of the temple, their faces red and eyes looking everywhere but at each other. Teyla hurried to them as she saw them.
“Are you two okay? Are you injured” Teyla asked them, looking warily between them.
“No, we are okay. Let’s go home now I never want to see this place again,” John said as he walked past Teyla and Ronon, who was standing quiet but menacing, and headed towards the now fixed Stargate.
“What has happened Dr. McKay?” Teyla asked very worried about the Colonel.
“Lets just say Teyla, that the Colonel is deathly afraid of clowns, and I can understand that fear now,” Rodney said shuddering as he followed Sheppard to the Stargate, leaving behind a very confused Teyla who looked at Ronon and mouth the word ‘clown’ to him.
“I do not know what a clown is but if Sheppard is afraid of them then I hope never to meet one of these clowns,” Ronon said to her.
“I agree I never want to meet a clown,” Teyla agreed as they both walked to the Stargate thoughts of clowns in their minds.
Author: weasleysangel
Pairing: Sheppard/? Sheppard/McKay implied
Rating: PG
Summary: Sheppard has a Stargate fetish and it’s all Rodney’s fault.
WARNING!: This fic may contain inapropriat use of a stargate read with caution.
Lt. Colonel John Sheppard had never in his life seen anything as beautiful as the thing in front of him; it was huge and shiny and round and he wanted it for his own he wanted to... to.. Well he didn’t quite know what he wanted to do with it yet but he was sure he was now claiming it as his.
“Mine! Mine, mine, mine!” John chants to himself as he gets to know his new shiny ring better. “My precious.”
John didn't let the screaming and shouting faze him as he lavished his love on his big, round jewel ignoring his surroundings.
“COLONEL, STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!” Rodney McKay squawked as he watched his team leader hump the Stargate like an over excited puppy
One of the natives that was now pointing a spear at Sheppard and his team said, “This man has desecrated our sacred ring he must be punished!”
“Sheppard only you would be able to get arrested for molesting a Stargate!” Rodney yelled at the oblivious colonel he looked over at Teyla and Ronon who both had equal looks of bewilderment on their faces.
Several of the natives around them went up the stairs to the Stargate and proceeded to try to extract the Colonel from his newfound girlfriend.
Sheppard kicked and screamed as he was dragged off of the Stargate by two burly half-dressed men “No! MINE! YOU CAN”T HAVE IT! IT IS MINE! I FOUND IT FIRST! MY PRECIOUS! I WILL BE BACK, I PROMISE!”
“Hey! Be careful with him - we need him!” Rodney yelled as he followed closely behind the burly men and a wildly protesting John.
As they entered the village John’s hysteria subsided rapidly replaced by embarrassment and confusion. The two burly men finished pulling John in to the temple and threw John on to the ground. Both of the big men were unfazed by the deadly glare thrown at them by Rodney.
Rodney looked over at the Colonel who was now thoroughly glaring at him
“McKay I told you not to touch anything but no you just had to touch it anyways,” John said his voice soft but filled with anger.
“WHAT! How was I supposed to know it would bring out your inner fetish for the Stargate?” Rodney said glaring back but the statement only got him smack on the back of the head. “Ow!”
Both men froze as they saw they had an audience, aside from the sasquatches standing at the temple door there was a woman, she was quite ugly in the face, but her clothing indicated that she was of significance to the village, and was standing at the other end of the temple’s single long room.
“It has come to my attention that you have dishonored our sacred ring,” the woman said.
“Umm...”
“You see…”
“About that…” Sheppard and McKay tried to explain.
“SILENCE!” the woman yelled effectively silencing both the men. “You are to be punished for your actions. You,” she said pointing at Sheppard, “for your heinous act, and you,” she continued pointing to McKay, “for being the cause of the grave dishonor.”
The two men looked at each other then back at the woman, the same thoughts of doom flowing through their heads.
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Rodney and John walked shakily out of the temple, their faces red and eyes looking everywhere but at each other. Teyla hurried to them as she saw them.
“Are you two okay? Are you injured” Teyla asked them, looking warily between them.
“No, we are okay. Let’s go home now I never want to see this place again,” John said as he walked past Teyla and Ronon, who was standing quiet but menacing, and headed towards the now fixed Stargate.
“What has happened Dr. McKay?” Teyla asked very worried about the Colonel.
“Lets just say Teyla, that the Colonel is deathly afraid of clowns, and I can understand that fear now,” Rodney said shuddering as he followed Sheppard to the Stargate, leaving behind a very confused Teyla who looked at Ronon and mouth the word ‘clown’ to him.
“I do not know what a clown is but if Sheppard is afraid of them then I hope never to meet one of these clowns,” Ronon said to her.
“I agree I never want to meet a clown,” Teyla agreed as they both walked to the Stargate thoughts of clowns in their minds.