I still hate my job a lot
-I want to wake up in the morning and not immediately wish I was dead
-I want to get an e-mail or a phone call and not cringe
-I want to not have a panic attack whenever someone higher than me wants to "see me" and wonder what I did wrong THIS TIME
-I want to have a normal commute that does not involve driving almost 40 minutes to a building in the middle of nowhere, then be trapped there all day because there's nothing else around (except traffic and trucks since it's just a spot where people get on and off the interstate)
-I want to get home before 7 PM on weekdays
-I want to be proud of what I do instead of feeling like a snake who's taking advantage of people
-I want to stop wishing my entire week away pining for the weekend
-...and stop getting to Friday and immediately spend the next two days dreading having to go back to it on Monday
-I want people to stop going "...oh" when I tell them where I work because they've never heard of it and probably never will
-...or they go "You mean that place that got sued last year?" instead
-I want to be thanked
-I want to be respected
-I want to ask questions and not get yelled at for askng questions
-When people at work ask "how are you?" I want to answer "good" without lying
-I want to be acknowledged
-I want to use the vacation time I earned when I want, not when they say I'm allowed to
-I want to feel like I can take time off and come back without missing everything or falling behind because there is too much to do and not enough time/staff to do it
-I want some feedback
-I want to give feedback without being told to sit down and shut up because I have a concern about someone higher on the pecking order than me
-I want supervisors who don't type IN ALL CAPS and use proper spelling and grammar and not millions of exclamation points!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-I want to leave work without crying or with a migraine
-I want to not be frustrated and angry all the time
-I want to come to work without wondering who's going to get fired today
-I want to come to work without wondering if I'M going to get fired today
-I want to feel happy for the people who find other jobs before they get fired, not jealous because they get to leave, why can't I?
-I want to get stuff that I request without having to fight for it
-I want to come home and unwind and do things I want to do instead of spending hours scouring and applying for more jobs that I'm not going to get
-I want to leave. I want to walk into my director's office and give the "I quit" speech I have had prepared for over a year. I want to actually get to the escape route I keep seeing but can't ever reach.
-I want to stop feeling like going to grad school was a mistake