A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Stables: Part One
Master Post
It starts with a procession of busses, one by one filing into the sizable campgrounds and finding their nests inside the parking lot. Kids from all over the country (and perhaps one or two international students as well) file off the busses with too many bags filled with things they will never even touch during the next five weeks.
All of the children meet on the grassy fields where there's marked boundaries for soccer and football. They check in with the counselors and are divided into groups of six and eight to move into their new cabins.
Every year it's always the same beginning. It's always the same end. But what happens in between, the meat of the summer sandwich, is always different. No summer is ever the same.
Patrick steps off the bus, slumped over so that his eyes are obscured by the hat he is wearing. He knows exactly where to go, dragging his duffel bag behind him, the only other belongings he has crammed into a Jansport backpack. This is the last thing he wants to be doing right now.
"Stump, welcome back. So glad you decided to give us another shot.” Patrick hears the snickering of some of the other campers and rolls his eyes. It wasn't his decision.
"Yeah, well. Parents thought it would be a good idea." All he can think of is getting through the next five weeks and returning home.
"You're going to be bunking in Cabin D this summer. Wentz is counselor this year, so please report to him."
Patrick's heart does a flip at learning that Wentz will be in charge of him and his cabin. Pete Wentz can barely take care of himself, much less a cabin of boys. But this is Pete, his best friend. Bunking with Pete is just going to make everything awkward, which is a definite downside. But Patrick can't have everything, now can he?
It's complicated, of course. It always is with boys and summer camp. Last year, Patrick was a simple teenage boy excited for the time without parents. This year, Patrick has to deal with hormones, crushes, and his worst fears.
Nothing has changed since he got there. If anything, his urge to go back home has increased with learning who his counselor is. Patrick reluctantly drags his bags over to the short dark-haired, dark-skinned boy who already has a gaggle of guys flocking around him. He recognizes some of them from last year. They range from the calm to the hyper to the assholes. At least he can count two of them as friends. Well, he could count them last year. Who knows how much has changed in a year?
"Ah, Stump, you've arrived. That means we're just waiting on Urie," says Pete, raising his sunglasses so that he can see Patrick without the tinted glasses. "Well don't look so damned depressed. This is gonna be a fucking fun time with me as counselor.” He winks and Patrick's stomach plummets. Yeah, this is going to be a long year.
It is no secret that Pete's dad runs Rigby's Summer Camp For Equestrians, a five-week summer sleep-away camp that caters to those that happen to be horse-crazy. Out of the girls and boys that attend, seventy-five percent are forced into this by their parents. Five percent actually want to ride horses and the remaining twenty percent are just happy to be away from home. Patrick used to be part of the tiny five percent.
Patrick rolls his eyes and keeps to himself. The less attention he draws to himself, the better. Of course he never really imagined that by acting like this, by trying to ignore everyone, he was in a sense drawing more attention to himself.
Brendon arrives a little late after trying to catch up with one of the other kids that got assigned to another cabin. Pete scolds him and starts leading them to the cabin, so Patrick tags along in the back.
He goes unnoticed until they reach the cabin and Patrick has to pick a bunk. He gets last pick, which is really not all that much of a big deal to Patrick. He already doesn't want to be here, so why should he care where he sleeps? He of course ends up getting the bunk below Pete by default. No one ever wants to sleep under the counselor. Patrick kind of wants to switch now.
"Patrick, why the long face?" Pete asks, concerned. Patrick really doesn't want to talk about anything. He wants to be home, sleeping all day and just enjoying his summer. Unfortunately, his parents seemed to think that this would be good for him.
"Don't wanna be here," Patrick mumbles, his eyes looking down at the ground, "Can't you just leave me alone? I have to unpack.” As much as he likes Pete, this isn't something he wants to share in front of everyone.
Pete lets Patrick go reluctantly, a look of sheer confusion on his face with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth. Patrick ignores it in favor of quietly putting all of his clothes and things away. He is aware of Pete watching him closely, but only after he starts to put his music under his bunk.
"Seriously, what do you want?" Patrick asks, narrowing his eyes. "Don't you have counselor duties to attend to?"
"Actually, my duties involve making sure everyone here is happy and doesn't need anything. And um. No offense dude, but you don't seem very happy. What's up? Is there anything I can help with?"
Patrick rolls his eyes and it takes him every last bit of willpower to keep from snapping at Pete. He doesn't hate the guy, he just doesn't want to deal with his persistence right now. Not when having to deal with the rest of the cabin around them.
"Dude, seriously. Would it kill you to mind your own business?" Patrick throws his bags under the bed and collapses onto his bunk. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to take a nap before we have to do anything."
Pete sighs and lets Patrick go. There would be no accomplishing anything with everyone around. He will just have to get a straight answer out of the boy later.
Later comes during dinner when Patrick stubbornly decides to sit alone. He's well rested, at least, and seems to have less of the snarkiness that Pete attributes to being cranky - the lack of sleep from a long ride.
"Patrick.” Pete nods as he sits down across from him and puts his tray on the table. "Mind if I…?"
Patrick bites his lip, but nods. It's a little reluctant, but Pete isn't being chased off, so it can't be a terribly bad thing.
"If you must," Patrick mumbles, poking at his food. "So, you're a counselor now."
"I'm a counselor now.” Pete nods, smiling slightly. Pete is two years older than Patrick and it's a little weird having any sort of responsibility over Patrick. But Pete knew it was bound to happen if Patrick came back. "Do you want to talk about what's wrong? Why you don't want to be here?"
Patrick sighs and stuffs his face full of mac & cheese for an excuse to not talk right away. It works for about thirty seconds before he swallows and realizes that he can't avoid this conversation forever. It's bound to come up eventually, especially tomorrow when - heaven forbid - he has to actually ride one of those horses again.
"You weren't there, I wouldn't expect you to remember,” Patrick begins with a roll of his eyes. He deliberately keeps this as vague as he can. He doesn’t want anyone to know what he's talking about in case anyone is actually listening.
"Tell me you're not talking about the goddamn fall you took," Pete stares at Patrick with a humorless expression. "That was last year, I thought you'd be over it by now."
"Pete, I thought I wasn't going to be able to walk again. It's a goddamn miracle that I'm here, walking. I'm not getting back up on a horse again.” Patrick sighs and silences himself with another shoveled spoonful of food. "I don't expect you to understand. You've never gone through this before."
Pete reaches across the table and touches Patrick's arm. Patrick flinches, but doesn't pull away. He isn't sure why he's not pulling away, but he knows it's futile. It's Pete; he always gets what he wants.
"I've fallen off of horses before. That's what happens when your dad owns this godforsaken camp. But you get back up and you show that horse whose boss.” He squeezes Patrick's arm before letting go. "You're going to have to get back up there eventually. You made it this far. You're walking, anyway, so you can't tell me you aren't just the least bit curious to get back into the saddle."
Truthfully, Patrick desperately wanted to ride again. But every time he goes to sleep, he relives that night over and over again. He knows as soon as he gets up on a horse again he's going to freeze. And horses can sense fear, or at least know when the rider isn't in complete control. Patrick doesn't want a repeat offense. He wants to ride but he doesn't want to face his fears.
"Curious, maybe. Doesn't mean I'm gonna want to go right back up there," replies Patrick. He isn't sure he can handle all of the responsibility involved with riding a horse. It used to be so easy, but falling off had complicated everything.
"Look, the facts are this. Your parents are paying a shitload of money for you to be here. You should at least do them the courtesy of trying to make their money worthwhile.” Pete has a point, Patrick does admit. But unfortunately, Patrick is so desperate to get out of there that he doesn't want to listen to him.
"My parents also disregarded what I wanted to do. I love it here, but I'm not ready to get back up on a horse.” Patrick sighs as he pushes his food away from him. "Surely you can understand where I'm coming from. I know it's been a year but it's still haunting me. I'm lucky to have full use of my legs, and I don't know if I'm ready to risk it again."
Pete sighs and places his hand on top of Patrick's. "Look, 'Trick. I respect your fear. No one's going to make you ride yet. But think of it like this. You've gone riding how many times now without falling? It was a fluke. You could just as soon have the same fluke while riding a bike or skiing. But if you get back up there and show the world you're not afraid to risk it, people will be proud of you. I know I would be."
Patrick glances up at Pete, his hand twitching underneath the other boy's. He rolls his eyes and picks his hand up so that their fingers push between each other, clasping his fingers around Pete's hand.
"It's not that I think I'm going to fall again. I just. I don't think I'm ready yet. I don't want to get up on a horse in front of ten other kids and have a freak-out. Please, at least understand that logic.” He brushes his thumb against Pete's, his teeth biting down around a plump lower lip. He knows he shouldn't be doing this with Pete. If anyone were to see this and make any sort of connection, they'd be in trouble in no time.
"We both have free periods after dinner. I could get permission from my dad to take a horse or two out to get you back in the saddle. Would you be okay with that?" Pete is persistent. He knows that Patrick needs to conquer this fear he has and he knows he's just the right guy to help him out.
"I wouldn't be too opposed to that," says Patrick softly. Like he needs another reason. Pete is probably one of the only people Patrick would ride with. He would much rather deal with Pete without the other boys around him. It's much safer that way.
"Great, then it's settled. I'll take you out starting tomorrow. Tonight we've got some stupid ice cream social.” Pete rolls his eyes and sighs as he pulls his hand away from Patrick’s. "You gonna be there or are you gonna stay in?"
"Well, depends. Are you going to be there?" Patrick asks, pulling his hand onto his lap when Pete does as well. "Because if you aren't then I don't have any reason to go. No one else likes me."
"Now you know that's not true," Pete argues, his eyes narrowing. "You have friends here. And you should try to talk to them. I'm only one person, Patrick, but to get back to the point where you were before the fall, you're going to need more than just me."
Patrick knows that he's right. Of course he's right; Pete's almost always right. But he's not sure who he can trust around here. It's silly to be so paranoid; he knows that. But he also knows that some of the kids here weren't as friendly as he thought. He needs to figure out who his real friends are before going back through the same motions as before.
"Look. I am going because I have to. But you should come too and you should hang out with more than just me. Reconnect with your old friends. At least one of them, yeah? It would make me feel better.” Pete searches Patrick's eyes and his face to see if he is going to lie. Patrick is a pretty good liar but Pete's always been pretty good at picking up on his nervous ticks.
"One? Well maybe…" Patrick thinks that it might not be such a bad idea to at least attempt to get back in touch with one of them. There has to be at least one kid there that he can trust.
"And then you've always got me to fall back on. I'll be there the whole time. Now let's throw our stuff out and get back to the cabin, yeah?" Pete brushes his hand against Patrick's arm as he gets up and starts to grab his things so that he can throw them out.
"Yeah. I guess I can give it a shot then.” Patrick smiles at Pete, hoping so hard that the shyness and the nerves aren't showing. He used to be so comfortable around Pete. But that was well before he started realizing that he liked guys. That he liked Pete.
"Good boy. C'mon.” Pete tosses his things out and Patrick follows suit. They have an hour until the ice cream social.
That hour is spent getting ready, which means Pete's in front of the mirror making sure his hair is perfect. The one downside to liking Pete is the competition. It's a well-known fact that Pete is a hit with all the girls. And maybe some of the boys, too. Which is why Patrick has pretty much avoided making a move. The humiliation would be too much on top of what happened to him last year.
Patrick doesn't really do much except change from shorts into a pair of nice jeans. He also changes his hat to one that's a little less casual. He brought many hats with him for the summer.
He looks at himself in the mirror, fixing the way his shirt falls and his collar bends. His clothes have always been really finicky. He sees Pete in the mirror and he doesn’t even have to look around when he hears those footsteps. There's a hand on his shoulder, but the warmth he feels masks him from even hearing what Pete has to say. It's like he's encased in a bubble and anything outside it is lost on him.
"C'mon, if we get there first, we'll get the best pick of the ice cream.” Pete's nudging him along and Patrick doesn't have the heart to tell him he wants to get there later, so that maybe they could just blend right in. He hates sticking out in a crowd.
But he follows Pete and keeps his hands in his pockets while he trains his eyes to the ground and just listens to Pete ramble on and on about who knows what. It's a pretty common thing for Pete to be the only one talking and for Patrick to barely listen to what's even being said.
"So, like, I really think this is going to be an awesome summer. Especially since I'm counselor now. Don't you?" Patrick hears finally when they reach the cabin where the social is being held. It's a sizable shelter with a floor suitable for dancing. There are decorations and banners welcoming the campers. Patrick draws in deep breaths so he doesn't end up freaking out in front of everyone. He can totally do this.
"Yeah, awesome," replies Patrick, making a passing glance at Pete and smiling slightly. He thinks that maybe it won't be so bad with Pete there. Pete's paying attention to him more than he ever usually did. They were friends, sure, but Pete being older usually meant that he hung out with the other older kids. Not with Patrick and his friends.
"So remember your promise. I want to hear all about the friend you reconnect with. I'll be over by the refreshments if you need me.” Pete pats Patrick on the head and hurries off. Patrick watches where he's headed and is not at all surprised to see that Gabe Saporta is there. Those two are practically attached at the hip.
Patrick sighs as he looks around the room, but recognizes no one. There are a few people there that are new, possibly younger kids whose parents are planning on sending them here every summer from now on. That was what Patrick's parents did. That's why Patrick is so well acquainted with Pete by now.
"Hey Stump.” Patrick hears a soft, female voice and turns around to see a familiar face he hasn't seen in years.
"Victoria!" Patrick's eyes light up as he recognizes her and he doesn't even hesitate to give her a hug. She's one year older, and so not quite at counselor status. Which means that she's at least more likely to hang out with Patrick and his friends than Pete. "Oh god, I'm glad you came back. I was worried I'd be stuck here with Pete."
"You think I'd really leave you with that creep?" Victoria points out with a smirk. She hugs Patrick tightly and holds him close. "Besides, I've got at least two years to go before you get rid of me."
Patrick sighs and pulls back, stealing a glance at her. Victoria is the only girl in the whole camp to actually pay attention to him. The other girls are too self-involved for Patrick's tastes, so it doesn't matter that much. Victoria's just cool and happens to be friends with a bunch of people who he thought were his friends.
"You wanna come say hi to the rest of the crew? Ryland insisted we get here early for the good ice cream.” Victoria rolls her eyes and just snorts. It's like music to Patrick's ears.
"Yeah, sure. Pete's off talking to Gabe so like hell am I going to be seeing much of him for the next two hours.” Patrick is starting to feel a little better about all of this. Still, he's a little bitter Pete's ignoring him for Gabe. Gabe is very creepy - and that's an understatement. Patrick doesn't trust him.
"You sure you shouldn't like…go save Pete or something?" Victoria asks, eyeing Gabe closely. Victoria and Gabe had a weird thing last year. Ever since, Patrick has had a grudge against him. He messed Victoria up pretty badly.
"Pete can do whatever the hell he wants,” states Patrick, who is currently gritting his teeth and trying hard not to look jealous. It's not working. Not at all.
"Aww Patrick. You're not jealous are you?" Victoria asks in a hushed voice. Patrick appreciates this more than she probably realizes. "Because you know, I'd much rather see Pete with you than with that asshole."
Gabe Saporta, in addition to breaking Victoria's heart, is notorious as both a womanizer and as a heartbreaker. He has been known to break hearts because he cannot, under any circumstances, stay tied down to one woman or man. Which is insane because the guy's only seventeen.
Most of the kids at camp either look up to Gabe and his so-called pimpin' ways. The other half of the kids scorn him. Mostly because they are the ones Gabe fucked over. And then there are the kids that are adorably ignorant of Gabe and his evil ways.
"So what if I am?" Patrick mumbles, rolling his eyes and marching over to the ice cream table so he can make his goddamn ice cream and stop spying on Pete and Gabe. He's making mental notes to yell at Pete for associating with the other counselor (and who in their right mind made Gabe a counselor, anyway?!). "I've been friends with him for years and like. I don't know. I just started high school, so y'know. I'm looking at people more. And by people I mean guys.” Patrick sighs, his cheeks turning bright pink. He's just glad he can tell Victoria these things.
Victoria takes Patrick's hand and points it towards this one girl sitting with a gaggle of guys surrounding her. Patrick recognizes her as Ashlee Simpson, one of the girls that, surprise, surprise, never notices Patrick's existence. She's pretty, cute, and other than the snobbiness, pretty sweet. Patrick still remembers the time she actually sat down to eat lunch with him when Pete wasn't feeling too good. Ashlee happens to be friends with Pete.
"That’s my Pete," she explains, placing her hand on Patrick's shoulder. "We all have our weaknesses. Mine just happens to be an adorable blond princess.” She winks and laughs softly, shaking her head at the ridiculousness of the situation.
"I guess we've both had to rethink our lives," Patrick admits, his eyes still on the beautiful blond. How is it that both he and Victoria managed to have their eyes set on the two people they can't get even close to? Except for, perhaps, as just a friend.
"Well, yours came in the form of something a little more serious. How are you, by the way? I'm sorry I never got to write.” Victoria frowns, her eyes on Patrick in a look of concern. He can see it in her eyes as clear as day. He's lucky to have her as a friend.
"I'm walking, aren't I?" Patrick points out with a shrug. He's still not exactly comfortable talking about it. He's not sure he ever will be.
"Yeah, but you seem a little out of sorts,” Victoria replies with a frown. Patrick resents her ability to see through his emotional shields. She's always been quite receptive.
"I'm fine," Patrick lies, but at Victoria's look of disbelief, he realizes that he is not going to be able to get away with lying around her. "I don't wanna ride again. I don't even want to be here.” His voice wavers as he looks away from the older girl. Sometimes he wishes he could have convinced his parents to let him stay home, but with Victoria and Pete back in his life, he's wondering just how much better off he would be. At least he has some friends here. At least Victoria still considers herself Patrick's friend. And finally, at least he can trust her. She's not like the rest of the people here.
"I'm glad you're here, even if you don't want to start riding again. Not that I don't blame you for not wanting to ride but you're an amazing rider. The center will be losing a great equestrian if you quit on us.” Somehow Victoria manages to ease his mind better than Pete. Even though he knows he has the lessons with Pete at night to look forward to, Victoria has been doing a better job at calming him, even to the point where Patrick really is considering giving it an honest shot.
"I'm really glad you're here," Patrick whispers, his cheeks burning up from embarrassment at admitting that. He likes Victoria even more this year than previous years. He's not sure what it is about her but he knows he wants to be around her more.
"I'm glad I'm here, too. And that you're here." Victoria grins and nudges Patrick forward. She's already gotten her ice cream and Patrick's been sort of standing there stupidly. Luckily there isn't a line forming yet.
Patrick rolls his eyes, the blush turning brighter red when he realizes that he has completely forgotten the purpose for coming over to the table. He grabs his ice cream and toppings and follows her to the bleachers.
"Hey, Pete's not talking to Gabe anymore," Victoria points out, nudging in the direction of Pete, who is now flirting with one of the other guys that Patrick can't stand. But at least it's not Gabe, right?
Patrick sighs, rolling his eyes. Like hell will he ever obtain Pete's heart. "Forget about it. He's so out of my league it isn't even funny. We're better off as friends."
Victoria frowns at that, sighing as she focuses on her half-melted sundae. "Well if you talk like that, then you bet your ass you won't ever win his heart over. Go talk to him. Flirt with him. When you turn on the Patrick charm, he can't say no."
Patrick chews on his lip, shoveling ice cream in his mouth. He wonders if Victoria is right. Is he charming enough to win Pete? After all, he might not have the looks of Gabe or any of the other guys, but he has the personality to outshine them. And he happens to be one of Pete's closest friends. Maybe he should give it a shot.
"Look, what's the worst that could happen? You remain friends with him, right? Which is what would happen if you don't do anything, so might as well see if anything will actually come of it."
Victoria does have a point there, and Patrick has to admit this. Either way, rejection or doing nothing would result in the same thing. It's not like Pete would be stupid enough to stop talking to him if he knows that Patrick happens to like him. But can he actually go up to Pete and tell him that he likes him? Does he have enough courage to say those words?
"Do it or I'll do it for you.” Victoria smirks and that's it. Patrick's heart sinks into his chest and he knows that he's going to have to man up and do it. He'd much rather have Pete hear from his own mouth than from Victoria's.
"Oh fine, but if anything bad happens, I'm totally blaming you," replies Patrick with a snicker as he straightens out his outfit and starts to make his way over to Pete before realizing he still has his ice cream. Probably a bad idea to take that with him. "Uh, can you hold this for me while I throw caution to the wind?" Patrick turns to Victoria and pushes his dish of ice cream towards her.
Victoria graciously grabs the dish from Patrick and nudges him forward. He gulps as he takes the first few steps and pauses to fuss with his hair once again. He can do this, he tells himself. He totally can. He is not a chicken, no way, no how. It takes him a few awkward steps before he gets a rhythm down with his walking and strides up to Pete as coolly as he can.
Unfortunately, by the time he gets there, Pete has managed to cozy up to Ashlee Simpson, the girl that Victoria had her eyes on. And as he opens his mouth, Ashlee is sticking her tongue down his throat.
Patrick says nothing and just leaves, shame spreading across his cheeks in bright pink patches. Just his luck, he thinks to himself. Just their luck. He looks to Victoria, who's wearing a similar look of disappointment. He shakes his head and returns to his friend. It really was too good to be true.
"Guess I'll be hanging my head in shame and forgetting I ever thought I had a chance with him," Patrick mumbles as he grabs his ice cream and shovels the last of the melted mess into his mouth.
"Hey, I have an idea.” Victoria's mouth turns upwards in a smirk, her eyes narrowed in a look of wicked mischief. Patrick feels pure terror wash over him for just one second. That look is never a good one on Victoria. She may be pretty, but she's also a sly, conspiring girl. Just ask Gabe; he knows her taste of revenge all too well.
"Oh god. Please don't do anything stupid," Patrick pleas, looking at Victoria as he feels his gut stirring. He is pretty sure that Victoria is going to have an idea that will bring Patrick down with her. He's not sure he wants that right now after finding out the apparent love of his life decided to choose Ashlee before he could even plea his case.
"No, no, this is totally a good idea, hear me out.” She slings her arm around Patrick's shoulders and holds him close to her side. "Why don't we pretend to date this summer? Maybe that will get them to notice us and make them jealous."
Patrick rolls his eyes and walks over to the trash can to throw out his empty dish. "No way. I am not going to do some stupid thing like that. Anyway, Pete's not going to be jealous and Ashlee isn't either. They've got each other and seemed perfectly happy."
"Do you have a better idea?" asks Victoria, raising an eyebrow. She is definitely not someone Patrick would ever want to get on a bad side against.
"As a matter of fact. It's called we mind our own business and make this summer tolerable so that I don't end up trying to kill myself by the end of the month.” Patrick's voice is filled with dry sarcasm that only he can manage so well. "If you want to make Ashlee jealous, by all means, find someone else. But I'm not making things worse and I'm not pretending to date you. That's just asking for trouble, no offense."
"Fine. Whatever," Victoria replies with a roll of her eyes. "Have fun watching the lovesick duo then, I'm going to go plan that couple's demise."
Patrick sighs as he watches Victoria go off in search for someone else to help her with her plan. He wonders if he should have helped her out, but he knows that if Pete ever found out he pretended to date Victoria or tried to break the two of them up, any chance that he ever had of even being friends with him would be over.
"Hey, you remember Ashlee,” a very familiar voice behind him begins. Patrick turns around to find Pete and Ashlee standing right there before his very eyes. Great. Just what he needs.
"Yeah, of course.” Patrick nods, trying his hardest to not look completely sick at the thought of the two of them together.
"Ashlee this is Patrick. He's in my cabin this year." Pete motions to Patrick and Ashlee looks delighted. He can't blame her; Patrick would be if he were dating Pete.
"Oh yeah, I remember him. He was in my riding ring last year. Poor thing, how are you doing?" Ashlee places her hand on Patrick's shoulder and he kind of swoons. Ashlee is beautiful. He suddenly doesn't have any desire to wish their relationship harm. Maybe it's because he remembers how she was the one that dismounted and hurried to his side when he took the fall. She was the only one in the class to even think to do something aside from the riding instructor.
"Well. I'm alright,” Patrick replies simply, trying so hard not to betray his feelings in front of Ashlee. He wishes things were simpler now. But god, if Pete is trying to get them to be friends, Patrick is just about ready to slam his head against the wall multiple times. "I'm walking. Doesn't mean I wanna go riding anytime soon though."
"Yeah, that's what Pete told me. He said he was going to take you for a ride in the night after dinner though. That's very nice of him!" Ashlee is sweet and Patrick really hates himself for wanting to replace her. But even talking to her now doesn't change his feelings for Pete.
"Yeah, very nice.” Patrick glances up at Pete and offers him a false smile. The frown on Pete's face tells him that Pete doesn't buy his smile. Crap.
"Hey Trick, can I talk to you?" Pete asks. Oh great. Patrick thinks he's going to be sick now. Even though he has no idea what Pete wants to talk about he knows this is not a conversation he wants to be having on the first day.
"Yeah, of course." Patrick looks up at Ashlee and nods before looking back at Pete. He waits for Pete to start walking and follows him, the uneasy feeling in his stomach returning once again. He wishes there were a reason why he could bail on this talk.
"I saw you coming over earlier," Pete begins once they're out of earshot. "Then you left. What did you want?"
"Oh it's nothing. I didn't want to bother you while you were with her," says Patrick, scratching the back of his neck. He's pretty sure Pete can tell a nervous tick when he sees one, especially when it comes to Patrick.
"Well she's not here now. So what's up? And why are you suddenly all mopey?" Pete asks, and if Patrick isn't hearing things he kind of hears Pete sounding hurt or something. Crazy.
"It doesn't matter anymore," Patrick mumbles, his eyes going to the floor. He wishes he could die right now. Perhaps it's a bit melodramatic, but that's how Patrick rolls right now. He is a whiny teenager, after all.
"Bullshit," Pete hisses. "Look, you might be fine with not talking about it but if not talking about it means I get a cold shoulder than fuck that. What the hell did you want?"
"Dude, just. Seriously. It's redundant to talk about what I was going to talk about seeing as how you and Ashlee are an item now. I already know what your response would be.” Patrick feels his head go hot now because Pete knows doesn't he? Pete might be dense but he has to be able to figure out what's eating him based on that.
And if Pete really didn't know before, he knows now. Because he might be just a bit on the stupid side, but he's not that stupid. Patrick totally just admitted that he has the hots for Pete. And Pete feels like an ass for goading him into admitting it. But only just a little bit of an ass.
"So wait. Let me get this straight in case I'm not understanding correctly," Pete starts, raising an eyebrow curiously as he mulls over Patrick's words. "You were coming over to tell me that you like me and then you saw Ashlee and me and you ran away?"
Patrick sighs and refuses to look at Pete. There is no way he is going to show Pete how heartbroken he is. He's a strong guy; he doesn't need to worry about the end of the world since there are totally other guys besides Pete that he can focus on this summer.
"That is it isn't it?" Pete whispers, smirking as he takes a step closer to Patrick. "Admit it, you totally have the hots for me."
Patrick rolls his eyes and takes a step back, his hands on his hips and his chest pushed out. He hopes he looks more menacing than he feels.
"So what if that is it?" Patrick asks, his eyes passing up and down Pete's body. He wishes he were the type of person that could just kiss the smirk off Pete's face. But he doesn't want to get Pete or Ashlee angry with him right now. He has no idea what Pete is intending on doing now.
"I think," Pete whispers as he moves closer to Patrick, placing a hand on his shoulder, "you shouldn't be so quick to judge a situation. Ashlee and I aren't dating."
But Patrick knows better. After all, he definitely saw Ashlee and Pete playing tonsil hockey, right? It's not like he was hallucinating that.
"But you were kissing her. With tongue," Patrick points out, his eyes narrowing. Did Pete really expect him to be that stupid? Maybe he did, come to think of it.
"She kissed me," Pete points out, poking Patrick's shoulder for emphasis. "If you had stayed there for another second you would've seen me turn her down. I don't like her like that, and she's cool with it. We're still friends."
"Well sorry if it looked like you didn't seem to mind by the way you were kind of kissing back.” Patrick is observant, of course. It isn't like he just assumed that Pete enjoyed the kiss. He's not an idiot and knows that when a guy kisses back it tends to mean there's something there that he likes.
"I also told her that I wouldn't mind making out with her in a no strings attached sort of way.” Pete shrugs, slouching a little in a more casual, less seductive sort of way. "Look dude, I'm sorry you jumped to conclusions, but what I'm saying is that I'm not unavailable. In fact, I'm very much available. And if you don't want me to make out with Ashlee Simpson anymore so that I can make out with you instead, I will."
Patrick's jaw drops when Pete says this and he isn't sure whether it's such a good idea to get involved with Pete, with someone who is supposedly one of his best friends at this camp, but his heart is beating so rapidly that his brain can't think. He can't say no at this point and he already knows this.
"So what'll it be?" Pete asks, tapping his foot impatiently. Well, at least Patrick knows this is the Pete Wentz he knows and loves.
"Dude, like you even have to ask.” Patrick snorts as he takes a step closer and steps up on his tiptoes to place a peck on Pete's cheek. "Don't be offended or anything, but you'll get the rest sometime when we're not surrounded by people still."
By the looks of Pete's goofy face, though, Patrick is pretty sure Pete doesn't mind at all. Awesome.
"Tomorrow. After we get you back to riding, you will see just how much I have been waiting for this.” Pete winks and disappears to go back to his group of friends, leaving Patrick confused and yet excited. This would be something to look forward to. It wouldn't be so bad, he thought, combining the riding with the kissing. It would make it easier to deal with this newfound fear he managed to develop.
When Patrick sees Victoria looking thoroughly kissed later, he wonders if Ashlee kissed her or if she moved on. He's beginning to realize that at this camp, things aren't always what they seem. He may have been going here for many summers so far, but never has he paid such close attention to how things worked.
He looks in the corner, for example, to see two people that shouldn't be near each other otherwise making out like it's no big deal. Maybe he's just growing up finally and everyone else already accepted it. Whatever the case may be, he is definitely looking forward to what this year has in store.
…
"Patrick," A voice calls his name and Patrick looks around but he can't find the source. It's dark and there's a fog surrounding him. He sees someone bound to a tree and races to cut the ropes. His heart is pumping so rapidly he thinks it might burst out of his chest.
When he gets close enough to the tree he realizes those aren't ropes but snakes squeezing the victim to the tree. He can't make out who the person is that's tied to the tree, but he knows he needs to free him. That's all that his mind is bent on, but how do you lure a snake away from a tree when it's about to feast?
He doesn't know what to do and he's starting to sense he's too late. That there is nothing he can do but watch this poor innocent soul suffer. He turns around to send for help when he feels a snake curling around his chest. He can't move and the snake restricts further.
"Beware of the Cobra," a voice hisses in his ear. "Do not underestimate our power."
Patrick shoots up in his bunk and nearly hits his head. Thank god he's short enough that it's never an issue.
He looks up to see Pete craning his head down from the bunk above him. He's looking at Patrick curiously and it's a little unnerving. He's just glad Pete isn't the type of person to make fun of him for having such a nightmare.
"You okay?" he whispers. "You look like hell."
Patrick nods, grabbing for his glasses that he placed under his bed so he wouldn't accidentally crack them. "Yeah, just a bad dream. I'll be okay," he whispers back. "Go back to sleep."
"Can't.” Pete frowns as he continues to stare at Patrick. "I've been having trouble sleeping for the past couple of months. Think I might have insomnia or something."
"That's too bad," Patrick whispers, moving over in his bunk. "If you go back before everyone else wakes up, you can sleep here tonight."
This used to be a regular thing for them. On nights when Pete couldn't sleep, he would sleep next to Patrick and things would somehow be okay. The only thing that changed since they started doing this was that Pete's inability to sleep became more frequent. They got older, but other than Pete developing complete insomnia, some things just never changed.
Pete climbs down from his top bunk and slides in next to Patrick without another word. He slips underneath the covers and moves close enough to steal some of Patrick's body heat. Patrick can't help but realize just how much he missed this over the past ten months.
"Your mattress is more comfortable than mine," Pete mumbles into Patrick's neck. "So not fair." That produces a giggle from Patrick, who rolls his eyes and wraps an arm around Pete.
"Guess top bunk's not always better," Patrick whispers back, abandoning his glasses again now that Pete's there. He closes his eyes and hums a few bars of the last song that invaded his mind.
"Nah, but if it means being above you then I'll take one for the team.” Pete grins as he opens one eye to look at Patrick. When Patrick starts humming, that calms him down enough to finally fall asleep.
But by the time Patrick wakes up, Pete has wiggled his way out of his arms and is back in the top bunk. Patrick has no idea if he wished he could have woken up to Pete next to him, but he does feel emptiness in his heart. Though he is glad the other boys didn't catch them snuggling, he knows he would have been content looking into Pete's eyes that morning, no matter what.
He isn't given much time to mope over this though, as before long it's time to get up, the call of the wake up horn raising everyone out of their beds. Time to prepare himself for almost certain humiliation. Assuming he does choose to go riding today, of course.
At breakfast, Pete sits across from him and Victoria takes a seat next to him. It's a little bit awkward until Ashlee sits across from Victoria and they soon realize what is going on.
"So, like, is it true what I hear?" Ashlee asks, turning to Pete. "You and the munchkin?" Patrick is half a second away from scowling until he notices the wink from Ashlee. She doesn't mean him harm. Which is surprising considering what he witnessed the night before.
"Maybe," Pete replies with a shrug. "What's it to you?" Patrick is suddenly glad to have Pete as a friend. He isn't sure that any other guy he managed to have a crush on would defend him like this. In fact, he's pretty sure that any other guy would make fun of him instead.
"I also here there are shenanigans to be had tonight. You teaching the little Stumpkin how to get back on the horse?" she continues with a wide grin on her face. Patrick could possibly die right now but somehow the teasing manner of her voice is making it just slightly okay. But he still wants to kill Pete and her, because seriously. Stumpkin?
"Maybe. I'm not hearing the bulk of your question though. What's up, Simpson? You planning on joining us?"
"Maybe I am," she replies, glancing over at Victoria. "Not to laugh or anything in case Patrick fails horribly, but I do enjoy my nightly rides. Isn't that right, Victoria?"
"That is indeed correct," Victoria replies, giggling and hiding behind her hand. "Okay, okay. We got off to the wrong foot with all the conspiring last night and I thought we could all four of us go out on a ride tonight. If Patrick's up to it, of course."
Patrick gulps as he contemplates this. He really didn't want an audience tonight. He wanted it to be time spent alone with Pete with promises of making out when they were finished with the riding. But maybe it wouldn't be so bad, even with Ashlee and Victoria tagging along.
"Only if Patrick is okay with it," Pete states all high and mighty. Patrick might feel his heart skip a beat, but if he does, he ignores it. It's not important.
"Only if you guys promise to keep the focus away from me. You know how I feel about having the spotlight." Patrick sighs, pretty sure he's making a bad choice with this. He'll find out in due time, he thinks to himself.
"You know us. You won't even know we're there.” Victoria blows a kiss and that's that. They turn the conversation to more inconsequential things, more insignificant. Patrick has an uneasy feeling in his stomach, but all in all, he is looking forward to tonight.
Now he just has to get through the rest of the day.
…
When the sun sets that night, Patrick is exhausted. He didn't ride during lessons and was thankful that his instructor didn't force him up on horseback. He was certain that Pete would be able to get him on horseback that evening. But he did play sports with the other boys. That was at least an activity he knew he wouldn't get injured in to the point of near death.
But now the sun has fallen down beneath the horizon, bringing a chill and bringing darkness over the world around him. Patrick has never been a huge fan of the night, but he might be able to get used to it if it brings him things like Pete and night rides.
After dinner, Patrick, Pete, Victoria, and Ashlee start to leave their cabins for the stables. Pete has gotten permission to take four horses out thanks to his father; sometimes being friends with Pete does have its perks. Patrick feels his hands start to shake but Pete grasps his hand before he can make any sort of move to head back to the cabin.
Ashlee and Victoria have run ahead, excited for their night ride while Pete and Patrick trail behind, hands entwined. Pete leans in close to Patrick and whispers something in his ear.
"I made you a promise last year before you fell off the horse. I intend to keep it. Don't think I haven't forgotten.” Pete kisses Patrick's forehead and then pauses mid-step, stopping Patrick as well to pull him in for a kiss, slow and sensual. Patrick's heart beats so rapidly it's surely about to burst free from his ribcage.
"I didn't think you'd remember," Patrick whispers once they pull back from the kiss. "But thank you. It means a lot." He smiles and tugs at Pete's hand to get him to continue on the path to the stables.
When they arrive at the stables, the four horses are waiting for them in their respective stalls. They get them tacked up with saddles and bridles in record time. All four have taken enough horse care classes to know just how to go about putting this equipment on a horse themselves. Which is a relief, because Patrick isn't sure he wants to watch Pete attempt to show each of them how it's done.
"How's Lila?" Pete asks, poking his head out from the stall he's been in, tightening the girth. He placed his fingers between the girth and the horse's stomach to make sure it's tight enough.
"She's good," Patrick replies, his voice strained. Lila is of course the horse that Pete has given Patrick. She's a horse that doesn't spook easily. Pete did that on purpose to make sure Patrick has the easiest time getting back into the swing of things.
"Excellent. Victoria and Ashlee are gonna be in another ring while we're getting you back in the saddle, so it'll just be me and you, alright?" he asks, leading his horse out of the stall.
"Oh. Good, yeah. That'll be good.” Patrick draws in deep breaths as he strokes Lila's mane and tries to get her calm. A calm horse is a good horse. "At least they're warmed up, right? Won't need to do that."
"That's exactly why I wanted to get them out later rather than before breakfast," says Pete, facing Patrick's stall, his hands tightly holding the reins of his mare underneath her chin. "Meet you in the center ring, okay? Whenever you're ready."
Patrick takes his time getting reacquainted with Lila. He'd ridden her a couple of years ago and she was a fairly good horse back then. He felt the fear running through his veins though, unsure if he would be able to get himself calm again. He knows horses don't usually buck people off. Lila especially. But he can't shake the feeling he felt when he was soaring through the air after his horse reared inexplicably. He nearly saw his life flashing before his eyes before landing.
And now he's supposed to go riding again, like nothing happened.
But deep down, Patrick knows he wants to do this. He wants to show everyone he can triumph over his fears. He's just not sure he really is ready yet.
"Well, Lila. I suppose I can't stall much longer, can I? Shall we show these guys what's what?" Patrick muses, patting her shoulder as he starts leading her out of her stall.
He leads her to the center ring and finds Pete already on top of his horse Bucephalus. Bucephalus happened to be Pete's favorite horse, named fondly after Alexander the Great's horse. Patrick can't help but look at Pete and giggle as he thinks of Pete as Alexander. He knows that Pete would be a really shitty leader.
"There you are," Pete replies, trotting over to Patrick, who is guiding Lila into the center of the ring so he can mount.
"Here I am," Patrick replies with a sigh. This is it; it's now or never. He draws in a deep breath as he checks the lengths of the stirrups so that he won't have to do much tightening while up on the horse. Once Lila is aligned with the mounting block, he steps up onto it, puts his left foot in one stirrup, and pulls himself up so that he's landed himself right in the center of the saddle.
"Welcome back, Trickster," Pete teases as he steers Bucephalus over to Lila. "How's it feel to be back on top?"
Patrick glances over at Pete with a glare, but he's smirking. It does feel kind of nice to be back. He squeezes his feet against Lila's sides to get her to start walking, clucking his tongue for a little help.
"It feels good. Where are the girls?" he asks, bringing Lila around for a warm up, mostly for himself. He isn't sure going right into cantering is such a good idea.
"They're the next ring over," Pete replies, kicking his legs against Bucephalus to get him to trot again. "Let's do some trotting," he calls, trotting the horse around the ring.
Patrick follows suit, tapping his heels against Lila a little bit harder to get her to trot. He posts, using his leg strength to push his ass up out of the saddle and sitting back down again, a motion that some equestrians have managed to deem as appropriate for when trotting. Patrick does have to admit that it's a lot easier to post than sit without bouncing in the saddle.
In the midst of everything, he doesn't see the approaching figures. He's having too much fun feeling the wind blowing against him, focusing on what's right in front of him. He doesn't see the snakes slithering into the ring. Not until it's too late.
Not until Lila rears, and try as he might, Patrick can't hold on; he's too startled to think of grabbing at the horse's neck and struggle to stay on.
It's happening again, he thinks to himself. This time, he's not going to be so lucky. This time…
But there is no this time. Because Patrick doesn't hit the ground. He hits the water. The cold water is such a shock that Patrick forgets to hold his breath and he thinks he's drowning. Oh god, he's drowning, drowning, and this is how he's going to die. In the water instead of in the ring. And he won't even have said goodbye to Pete.
But just when he thinks he's sinking too fast with that helmet and those jodhpurs and the boots, he finds himself back in the ring, stumbling over onto his front. After that, everything goes black.
Part Two
It starts with a procession of busses, one by one filing into the sizable campgrounds and finding their nests inside the parking lot. Kids from all over the country (and perhaps one or two international students as well) file off the busses with too many bags filled with things they will never even touch during the next five weeks.
All of the children meet on the grassy fields where there's marked boundaries for soccer and football. They check in with the counselors and are divided into groups of six and eight to move into their new cabins.
Every year it's always the same beginning. It's always the same end. But what happens in between, the meat of the summer sandwich, is always different. No summer is ever the same.
Patrick steps off the bus, slumped over so that his eyes are obscured by the hat he is wearing. He knows exactly where to go, dragging his duffel bag behind him, the only other belongings he has crammed into a Jansport backpack. This is the last thing he wants to be doing right now.
"Stump, welcome back. So glad you decided to give us another shot.” Patrick hears the snickering of some of the other campers and rolls his eyes. It wasn't his decision.
"Yeah, well. Parents thought it would be a good idea." All he can think of is getting through the next five weeks and returning home.
"You're going to be bunking in Cabin D this summer. Wentz is counselor this year, so please report to him."
Patrick's heart does a flip at learning that Wentz will be in charge of him and his cabin. Pete Wentz can barely take care of himself, much less a cabin of boys. But this is Pete, his best friend. Bunking with Pete is just going to make everything awkward, which is a definite downside. But Patrick can't have everything, now can he?
It's complicated, of course. It always is with boys and summer camp. Last year, Patrick was a simple teenage boy excited for the time without parents. This year, Patrick has to deal with hormones, crushes, and his worst fears.
Nothing has changed since he got there. If anything, his urge to go back home has increased with learning who his counselor is. Patrick reluctantly drags his bags over to the short dark-haired, dark-skinned boy who already has a gaggle of guys flocking around him. He recognizes some of them from last year. They range from the calm to the hyper to the assholes. At least he can count two of them as friends. Well, he could count them last year. Who knows how much has changed in a year?
"Ah, Stump, you've arrived. That means we're just waiting on Urie," says Pete, raising his sunglasses so that he can see Patrick without the tinted glasses. "Well don't look so damned depressed. This is gonna be a fucking fun time with me as counselor.” He winks and Patrick's stomach plummets. Yeah, this is going to be a long year.
It is no secret that Pete's dad runs Rigby's Summer Camp For Equestrians, a five-week summer sleep-away camp that caters to those that happen to be horse-crazy. Out of the girls and boys that attend, seventy-five percent are forced into this by their parents. Five percent actually want to ride horses and the remaining twenty percent are just happy to be away from home. Patrick used to be part of the tiny five percent.
Patrick rolls his eyes and keeps to himself. The less attention he draws to himself, the better. Of course he never really imagined that by acting like this, by trying to ignore everyone, he was in a sense drawing more attention to himself.
Brendon arrives a little late after trying to catch up with one of the other kids that got assigned to another cabin. Pete scolds him and starts leading them to the cabin, so Patrick tags along in the back.
He goes unnoticed until they reach the cabin and Patrick has to pick a bunk. He gets last pick, which is really not all that much of a big deal to Patrick. He already doesn't want to be here, so why should he care where he sleeps? He of course ends up getting the bunk below Pete by default. No one ever wants to sleep under the counselor. Patrick kind of wants to switch now.
"Patrick, why the long face?" Pete asks, concerned. Patrick really doesn't want to talk about anything. He wants to be home, sleeping all day and just enjoying his summer. Unfortunately, his parents seemed to think that this would be good for him.
"Don't wanna be here," Patrick mumbles, his eyes looking down at the ground, "Can't you just leave me alone? I have to unpack.” As much as he likes Pete, this isn't something he wants to share in front of everyone.
Pete lets Patrick go reluctantly, a look of sheer confusion on his face with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth. Patrick ignores it in favor of quietly putting all of his clothes and things away. He is aware of Pete watching him closely, but only after he starts to put his music under his bunk.
"Seriously, what do you want?" Patrick asks, narrowing his eyes. "Don't you have counselor duties to attend to?"
"Actually, my duties involve making sure everyone here is happy and doesn't need anything. And um. No offense dude, but you don't seem very happy. What's up? Is there anything I can help with?"
Patrick rolls his eyes and it takes him every last bit of willpower to keep from snapping at Pete. He doesn't hate the guy, he just doesn't want to deal with his persistence right now. Not when having to deal with the rest of the cabin around them.
"Dude, seriously. Would it kill you to mind your own business?" Patrick throws his bags under the bed and collapses onto his bunk. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to take a nap before we have to do anything."
Pete sighs and lets Patrick go. There would be no accomplishing anything with everyone around. He will just have to get a straight answer out of the boy later.
Later comes during dinner when Patrick stubbornly decides to sit alone. He's well rested, at least, and seems to have less of the snarkiness that Pete attributes to being cranky - the lack of sleep from a long ride.
"Patrick.” Pete nods as he sits down across from him and puts his tray on the table. "Mind if I…?"
Patrick bites his lip, but nods. It's a little reluctant, but Pete isn't being chased off, so it can't be a terribly bad thing.
"If you must," Patrick mumbles, poking at his food. "So, you're a counselor now."
"I'm a counselor now.” Pete nods, smiling slightly. Pete is two years older than Patrick and it's a little weird having any sort of responsibility over Patrick. But Pete knew it was bound to happen if Patrick came back. "Do you want to talk about what's wrong? Why you don't want to be here?"
Patrick sighs and stuffs his face full of mac & cheese for an excuse to not talk right away. It works for about thirty seconds before he swallows and realizes that he can't avoid this conversation forever. It's bound to come up eventually, especially tomorrow when - heaven forbid - he has to actually ride one of those horses again.
"You weren't there, I wouldn't expect you to remember,” Patrick begins with a roll of his eyes. He deliberately keeps this as vague as he can. He doesn’t want anyone to know what he's talking about in case anyone is actually listening.
"Tell me you're not talking about the goddamn fall you took," Pete stares at Patrick with a humorless expression. "That was last year, I thought you'd be over it by now."
"Pete, I thought I wasn't going to be able to walk again. It's a goddamn miracle that I'm here, walking. I'm not getting back up on a horse again.” Patrick sighs and silences himself with another shoveled spoonful of food. "I don't expect you to understand. You've never gone through this before."
Pete reaches across the table and touches Patrick's arm. Patrick flinches, but doesn't pull away. He isn't sure why he's not pulling away, but he knows it's futile. It's Pete; he always gets what he wants.
"I've fallen off of horses before. That's what happens when your dad owns this godforsaken camp. But you get back up and you show that horse whose boss.” He squeezes Patrick's arm before letting go. "You're going to have to get back up there eventually. You made it this far. You're walking, anyway, so you can't tell me you aren't just the least bit curious to get back into the saddle."
Truthfully, Patrick desperately wanted to ride again. But every time he goes to sleep, he relives that night over and over again. He knows as soon as he gets up on a horse again he's going to freeze. And horses can sense fear, or at least know when the rider isn't in complete control. Patrick doesn't want a repeat offense. He wants to ride but he doesn't want to face his fears.
"Curious, maybe. Doesn't mean I'm gonna want to go right back up there," replies Patrick. He isn't sure he can handle all of the responsibility involved with riding a horse. It used to be so easy, but falling off had complicated everything.
"Look, the facts are this. Your parents are paying a shitload of money for you to be here. You should at least do them the courtesy of trying to make their money worthwhile.” Pete has a point, Patrick does admit. But unfortunately, Patrick is so desperate to get out of there that he doesn't want to listen to him.
"My parents also disregarded what I wanted to do. I love it here, but I'm not ready to get back up on a horse.” Patrick sighs as he pushes his food away from him. "Surely you can understand where I'm coming from. I know it's been a year but it's still haunting me. I'm lucky to have full use of my legs, and I don't know if I'm ready to risk it again."
Pete sighs and places his hand on top of Patrick's. "Look, 'Trick. I respect your fear. No one's going to make you ride yet. But think of it like this. You've gone riding how many times now without falling? It was a fluke. You could just as soon have the same fluke while riding a bike or skiing. But if you get back up there and show the world you're not afraid to risk it, people will be proud of you. I know I would be."
Patrick glances up at Pete, his hand twitching underneath the other boy's. He rolls his eyes and picks his hand up so that their fingers push between each other, clasping his fingers around Pete's hand.
"It's not that I think I'm going to fall again. I just. I don't think I'm ready yet. I don't want to get up on a horse in front of ten other kids and have a freak-out. Please, at least understand that logic.” He brushes his thumb against Pete's, his teeth biting down around a plump lower lip. He knows he shouldn't be doing this with Pete. If anyone were to see this and make any sort of connection, they'd be in trouble in no time.
"We both have free periods after dinner. I could get permission from my dad to take a horse or two out to get you back in the saddle. Would you be okay with that?" Pete is persistent. He knows that Patrick needs to conquer this fear he has and he knows he's just the right guy to help him out.
"I wouldn't be too opposed to that," says Patrick softly. Like he needs another reason. Pete is probably one of the only people Patrick would ride with. He would much rather deal with Pete without the other boys around him. It's much safer that way.
"Great, then it's settled. I'll take you out starting tomorrow. Tonight we've got some stupid ice cream social.” Pete rolls his eyes and sighs as he pulls his hand away from Patrick’s. "You gonna be there or are you gonna stay in?"
"Well, depends. Are you going to be there?" Patrick asks, pulling his hand onto his lap when Pete does as well. "Because if you aren't then I don't have any reason to go. No one else likes me."
"Now you know that's not true," Pete argues, his eyes narrowing. "You have friends here. And you should try to talk to them. I'm only one person, Patrick, but to get back to the point where you were before the fall, you're going to need more than just me."
Patrick knows that he's right. Of course he's right; Pete's almost always right. But he's not sure who he can trust around here. It's silly to be so paranoid; he knows that. But he also knows that some of the kids here weren't as friendly as he thought. He needs to figure out who his real friends are before going back through the same motions as before.
"Look. I am going because I have to. But you should come too and you should hang out with more than just me. Reconnect with your old friends. At least one of them, yeah? It would make me feel better.” Pete searches Patrick's eyes and his face to see if he is going to lie. Patrick is a pretty good liar but Pete's always been pretty good at picking up on his nervous ticks.
"One? Well maybe…" Patrick thinks that it might not be such a bad idea to at least attempt to get back in touch with one of them. There has to be at least one kid there that he can trust.
"And then you've always got me to fall back on. I'll be there the whole time. Now let's throw our stuff out and get back to the cabin, yeah?" Pete brushes his hand against Patrick's arm as he gets up and starts to grab his things so that he can throw them out.
"Yeah. I guess I can give it a shot then.” Patrick smiles at Pete, hoping so hard that the shyness and the nerves aren't showing. He used to be so comfortable around Pete. But that was well before he started realizing that he liked guys. That he liked Pete.
"Good boy. C'mon.” Pete tosses his things out and Patrick follows suit. They have an hour until the ice cream social.
That hour is spent getting ready, which means Pete's in front of the mirror making sure his hair is perfect. The one downside to liking Pete is the competition. It's a well-known fact that Pete is a hit with all the girls. And maybe some of the boys, too. Which is why Patrick has pretty much avoided making a move. The humiliation would be too much on top of what happened to him last year.
Patrick doesn't really do much except change from shorts into a pair of nice jeans. He also changes his hat to one that's a little less casual. He brought many hats with him for the summer.
He looks at himself in the mirror, fixing the way his shirt falls and his collar bends. His clothes have always been really finicky. He sees Pete in the mirror and he doesn’t even have to look around when he hears those footsteps. There's a hand on his shoulder, but the warmth he feels masks him from even hearing what Pete has to say. It's like he's encased in a bubble and anything outside it is lost on him.
"C'mon, if we get there first, we'll get the best pick of the ice cream.” Pete's nudging him along and Patrick doesn't have the heart to tell him he wants to get there later, so that maybe they could just blend right in. He hates sticking out in a crowd.
But he follows Pete and keeps his hands in his pockets while he trains his eyes to the ground and just listens to Pete ramble on and on about who knows what. It's a pretty common thing for Pete to be the only one talking and for Patrick to barely listen to what's even being said.
"So, like, I really think this is going to be an awesome summer. Especially since I'm counselor now. Don't you?" Patrick hears finally when they reach the cabin where the social is being held. It's a sizable shelter with a floor suitable for dancing. There are decorations and banners welcoming the campers. Patrick draws in deep breaths so he doesn't end up freaking out in front of everyone. He can totally do this.
"Yeah, awesome," replies Patrick, making a passing glance at Pete and smiling slightly. He thinks that maybe it won't be so bad with Pete there. Pete's paying attention to him more than he ever usually did. They were friends, sure, but Pete being older usually meant that he hung out with the other older kids. Not with Patrick and his friends.
"So remember your promise. I want to hear all about the friend you reconnect with. I'll be over by the refreshments if you need me.” Pete pats Patrick on the head and hurries off. Patrick watches where he's headed and is not at all surprised to see that Gabe Saporta is there. Those two are practically attached at the hip.
Patrick sighs as he looks around the room, but recognizes no one. There are a few people there that are new, possibly younger kids whose parents are planning on sending them here every summer from now on. That was what Patrick's parents did. That's why Patrick is so well acquainted with Pete by now.
"Hey Stump.” Patrick hears a soft, female voice and turns around to see a familiar face he hasn't seen in years.
"Victoria!" Patrick's eyes light up as he recognizes her and he doesn't even hesitate to give her a hug. She's one year older, and so not quite at counselor status. Which means that she's at least more likely to hang out with Patrick and his friends than Pete. "Oh god, I'm glad you came back. I was worried I'd be stuck here with Pete."
"You think I'd really leave you with that creep?" Victoria points out with a smirk. She hugs Patrick tightly and holds him close. "Besides, I've got at least two years to go before you get rid of me."
Patrick sighs and pulls back, stealing a glance at her. Victoria is the only girl in the whole camp to actually pay attention to him. The other girls are too self-involved for Patrick's tastes, so it doesn't matter that much. Victoria's just cool and happens to be friends with a bunch of people who he thought were his friends.
"You wanna come say hi to the rest of the crew? Ryland insisted we get here early for the good ice cream.” Victoria rolls her eyes and just snorts. It's like music to Patrick's ears.
"Yeah, sure. Pete's off talking to Gabe so like hell am I going to be seeing much of him for the next two hours.” Patrick is starting to feel a little better about all of this. Still, he's a little bitter Pete's ignoring him for Gabe. Gabe is very creepy - and that's an understatement. Patrick doesn't trust him.
"You sure you shouldn't like…go save Pete or something?" Victoria asks, eyeing Gabe closely. Victoria and Gabe had a weird thing last year. Ever since, Patrick has had a grudge against him. He messed Victoria up pretty badly.
"Pete can do whatever the hell he wants,” states Patrick, who is currently gritting his teeth and trying hard not to look jealous. It's not working. Not at all.
"Aww Patrick. You're not jealous are you?" Victoria asks in a hushed voice. Patrick appreciates this more than she probably realizes. "Because you know, I'd much rather see Pete with you than with that asshole."
Gabe Saporta, in addition to breaking Victoria's heart, is notorious as both a womanizer and as a heartbreaker. He has been known to break hearts because he cannot, under any circumstances, stay tied down to one woman or man. Which is insane because the guy's only seventeen.
Most of the kids at camp either look up to Gabe and his so-called pimpin' ways. The other half of the kids scorn him. Mostly because they are the ones Gabe fucked over. And then there are the kids that are adorably ignorant of Gabe and his evil ways.
"So what if I am?" Patrick mumbles, rolling his eyes and marching over to the ice cream table so he can make his goddamn ice cream and stop spying on Pete and Gabe. He's making mental notes to yell at Pete for associating with the other counselor (and who in their right mind made Gabe a counselor, anyway?!). "I've been friends with him for years and like. I don't know. I just started high school, so y'know. I'm looking at people more. And by people I mean guys.” Patrick sighs, his cheeks turning bright pink. He's just glad he can tell Victoria these things.
Victoria takes Patrick's hand and points it towards this one girl sitting with a gaggle of guys surrounding her. Patrick recognizes her as Ashlee Simpson, one of the girls that, surprise, surprise, never notices Patrick's existence. She's pretty, cute, and other than the snobbiness, pretty sweet. Patrick still remembers the time she actually sat down to eat lunch with him when Pete wasn't feeling too good. Ashlee happens to be friends with Pete.
"That’s my Pete," she explains, placing her hand on Patrick's shoulder. "We all have our weaknesses. Mine just happens to be an adorable blond princess.” She winks and laughs softly, shaking her head at the ridiculousness of the situation.
"I guess we've both had to rethink our lives," Patrick admits, his eyes still on the beautiful blond. How is it that both he and Victoria managed to have their eyes set on the two people they can't get even close to? Except for, perhaps, as just a friend.
"Well, yours came in the form of something a little more serious. How are you, by the way? I'm sorry I never got to write.” Victoria frowns, her eyes on Patrick in a look of concern. He can see it in her eyes as clear as day. He's lucky to have her as a friend.
"I'm walking, aren't I?" Patrick points out with a shrug. He's still not exactly comfortable talking about it. He's not sure he ever will be.
"Yeah, but you seem a little out of sorts,” Victoria replies with a frown. Patrick resents her ability to see through his emotional shields. She's always been quite receptive.
"I'm fine," Patrick lies, but at Victoria's look of disbelief, he realizes that he is not going to be able to get away with lying around her. "I don't wanna ride again. I don't even want to be here.” His voice wavers as he looks away from the older girl. Sometimes he wishes he could have convinced his parents to let him stay home, but with Victoria and Pete back in his life, he's wondering just how much better off he would be. At least he has some friends here. At least Victoria still considers herself Patrick's friend. And finally, at least he can trust her. She's not like the rest of the people here.
"I'm glad you're here, even if you don't want to start riding again. Not that I don't blame you for not wanting to ride but you're an amazing rider. The center will be losing a great equestrian if you quit on us.” Somehow Victoria manages to ease his mind better than Pete. Even though he knows he has the lessons with Pete at night to look forward to, Victoria has been doing a better job at calming him, even to the point where Patrick really is considering giving it an honest shot.
"I'm really glad you're here," Patrick whispers, his cheeks burning up from embarrassment at admitting that. He likes Victoria even more this year than previous years. He's not sure what it is about her but he knows he wants to be around her more.
"I'm glad I'm here, too. And that you're here." Victoria grins and nudges Patrick forward. She's already gotten her ice cream and Patrick's been sort of standing there stupidly. Luckily there isn't a line forming yet.
Patrick rolls his eyes, the blush turning brighter red when he realizes that he has completely forgotten the purpose for coming over to the table. He grabs his ice cream and toppings and follows her to the bleachers.
"Hey, Pete's not talking to Gabe anymore," Victoria points out, nudging in the direction of Pete, who is now flirting with one of the other guys that Patrick can't stand. But at least it's not Gabe, right?
Patrick sighs, rolling his eyes. Like hell will he ever obtain Pete's heart. "Forget about it. He's so out of my league it isn't even funny. We're better off as friends."
Victoria frowns at that, sighing as she focuses on her half-melted sundae. "Well if you talk like that, then you bet your ass you won't ever win his heart over. Go talk to him. Flirt with him. When you turn on the Patrick charm, he can't say no."
Patrick chews on his lip, shoveling ice cream in his mouth. He wonders if Victoria is right. Is he charming enough to win Pete? After all, he might not have the looks of Gabe or any of the other guys, but he has the personality to outshine them. And he happens to be one of Pete's closest friends. Maybe he should give it a shot.
"Look, what's the worst that could happen? You remain friends with him, right? Which is what would happen if you don't do anything, so might as well see if anything will actually come of it."
Victoria does have a point there, and Patrick has to admit this. Either way, rejection or doing nothing would result in the same thing. It's not like Pete would be stupid enough to stop talking to him if he knows that Patrick happens to like him. But can he actually go up to Pete and tell him that he likes him? Does he have enough courage to say those words?
"Do it or I'll do it for you.” Victoria smirks and that's it. Patrick's heart sinks into his chest and he knows that he's going to have to man up and do it. He'd much rather have Pete hear from his own mouth than from Victoria's.
"Oh fine, but if anything bad happens, I'm totally blaming you," replies Patrick with a snicker as he straightens out his outfit and starts to make his way over to Pete before realizing he still has his ice cream. Probably a bad idea to take that with him. "Uh, can you hold this for me while I throw caution to the wind?" Patrick turns to Victoria and pushes his dish of ice cream towards her.
Victoria graciously grabs the dish from Patrick and nudges him forward. He gulps as he takes the first few steps and pauses to fuss with his hair once again. He can do this, he tells himself. He totally can. He is not a chicken, no way, no how. It takes him a few awkward steps before he gets a rhythm down with his walking and strides up to Pete as coolly as he can.
Unfortunately, by the time he gets there, Pete has managed to cozy up to Ashlee Simpson, the girl that Victoria had her eyes on. And as he opens his mouth, Ashlee is sticking her tongue down his throat.
Patrick says nothing and just leaves, shame spreading across his cheeks in bright pink patches. Just his luck, he thinks to himself. Just their luck. He looks to Victoria, who's wearing a similar look of disappointment. He shakes his head and returns to his friend. It really was too good to be true.
"Guess I'll be hanging my head in shame and forgetting I ever thought I had a chance with him," Patrick mumbles as he grabs his ice cream and shovels the last of the melted mess into his mouth.
"Hey, I have an idea.” Victoria's mouth turns upwards in a smirk, her eyes narrowed in a look of wicked mischief. Patrick feels pure terror wash over him for just one second. That look is never a good one on Victoria. She may be pretty, but she's also a sly, conspiring girl. Just ask Gabe; he knows her taste of revenge all too well.
"Oh god. Please don't do anything stupid," Patrick pleas, looking at Victoria as he feels his gut stirring. He is pretty sure that Victoria is going to have an idea that will bring Patrick down with her. He's not sure he wants that right now after finding out the apparent love of his life decided to choose Ashlee before he could even plea his case.
"No, no, this is totally a good idea, hear me out.” She slings her arm around Patrick's shoulders and holds him close to her side. "Why don't we pretend to date this summer? Maybe that will get them to notice us and make them jealous."
Patrick rolls his eyes and walks over to the trash can to throw out his empty dish. "No way. I am not going to do some stupid thing like that. Anyway, Pete's not going to be jealous and Ashlee isn't either. They've got each other and seemed perfectly happy."
"Do you have a better idea?" asks Victoria, raising an eyebrow. She is definitely not someone Patrick would ever want to get on a bad side against.
"As a matter of fact. It's called we mind our own business and make this summer tolerable so that I don't end up trying to kill myself by the end of the month.” Patrick's voice is filled with dry sarcasm that only he can manage so well. "If you want to make Ashlee jealous, by all means, find someone else. But I'm not making things worse and I'm not pretending to date you. That's just asking for trouble, no offense."
"Fine. Whatever," Victoria replies with a roll of her eyes. "Have fun watching the lovesick duo then, I'm going to go plan that couple's demise."
Patrick sighs as he watches Victoria go off in search for someone else to help her with her plan. He wonders if he should have helped her out, but he knows that if Pete ever found out he pretended to date Victoria or tried to break the two of them up, any chance that he ever had of even being friends with him would be over.
"Hey, you remember Ashlee,” a very familiar voice behind him begins. Patrick turns around to find Pete and Ashlee standing right there before his very eyes. Great. Just what he needs.
"Yeah, of course.” Patrick nods, trying his hardest to not look completely sick at the thought of the two of them together.
"Ashlee this is Patrick. He's in my cabin this year." Pete motions to Patrick and Ashlee looks delighted. He can't blame her; Patrick would be if he were dating Pete.
"Oh yeah, I remember him. He was in my riding ring last year. Poor thing, how are you doing?" Ashlee places her hand on Patrick's shoulder and he kind of swoons. Ashlee is beautiful. He suddenly doesn't have any desire to wish their relationship harm. Maybe it's because he remembers how she was the one that dismounted and hurried to his side when he took the fall. She was the only one in the class to even think to do something aside from the riding instructor.
"Well. I'm alright,” Patrick replies simply, trying so hard not to betray his feelings in front of Ashlee. He wishes things were simpler now. But god, if Pete is trying to get them to be friends, Patrick is just about ready to slam his head against the wall multiple times. "I'm walking. Doesn't mean I wanna go riding anytime soon though."
"Yeah, that's what Pete told me. He said he was going to take you for a ride in the night after dinner though. That's very nice of him!" Ashlee is sweet and Patrick really hates himself for wanting to replace her. But even talking to her now doesn't change his feelings for Pete.
"Yeah, very nice.” Patrick glances up at Pete and offers him a false smile. The frown on Pete's face tells him that Pete doesn't buy his smile. Crap.
"Hey Trick, can I talk to you?" Pete asks. Oh great. Patrick thinks he's going to be sick now. Even though he has no idea what Pete wants to talk about he knows this is not a conversation he wants to be having on the first day.
"Yeah, of course." Patrick looks up at Ashlee and nods before looking back at Pete. He waits for Pete to start walking and follows him, the uneasy feeling in his stomach returning once again. He wishes there were a reason why he could bail on this talk.
"I saw you coming over earlier," Pete begins once they're out of earshot. "Then you left. What did you want?"
"Oh it's nothing. I didn't want to bother you while you were with her," says Patrick, scratching the back of his neck. He's pretty sure Pete can tell a nervous tick when he sees one, especially when it comes to Patrick.
"Well she's not here now. So what's up? And why are you suddenly all mopey?" Pete asks, and if Patrick isn't hearing things he kind of hears Pete sounding hurt or something. Crazy.
"It doesn't matter anymore," Patrick mumbles, his eyes going to the floor. He wishes he could die right now. Perhaps it's a bit melodramatic, but that's how Patrick rolls right now. He is a whiny teenager, after all.
"Bullshit," Pete hisses. "Look, you might be fine with not talking about it but if not talking about it means I get a cold shoulder than fuck that. What the hell did you want?"
"Dude, just. Seriously. It's redundant to talk about what I was going to talk about seeing as how you and Ashlee are an item now. I already know what your response would be.” Patrick feels his head go hot now because Pete knows doesn't he? Pete might be dense but he has to be able to figure out what's eating him based on that.
And if Pete really didn't know before, he knows now. Because he might be just a bit on the stupid side, but he's not that stupid. Patrick totally just admitted that he has the hots for Pete. And Pete feels like an ass for goading him into admitting it. But only just a little bit of an ass.
"So wait. Let me get this straight in case I'm not understanding correctly," Pete starts, raising an eyebrow curiously as he mulls over Patrick's words. "You were coming over to tell me that you like me and then you saw Ashlee and me and you ran away?"
Patrick sighs and refuses to look at Pete. There is no way he is going to show Pete how heartbroken he is. He's a strong guy; he doesn't need to worry about the end of the world since there are totally other guys besides Pete that he can focus on this summer.
"That is it isn't it?" Pete whispers, smirking as he takes a step closer to Patrick. "Admit it, you totally have the hots for me."
Patrick rolls his eyes and takes a step back, his hands on his hips and his chest pushed out. He hopes he looks more menacing than he feels.
"So what if that is it?" Patrick asks, his eyes passing up and down Pete's body. He wishes he were the type of person that could just kiss the smirk off Pete's face. But he doesn't want to get Pete or Ashlee angry with him right now. He has no idea what Pete is intending on doing now.
"I think," Pete whispers as he moves closer to Patrick, placing a hand on his shoulder, "you shouldn't be so quick to judge a situation. Ashlee and I aren't dating."
But Patrick knows better. After all, he definitely saw Ashlee and Pete playing tonsil hockey, right? It's not like he was hallucinating that.
"But you were kissing her. With tongue," Patrick points out, his eyes narrowing. Did Pete really expect him to be that stupid? Maybe he did, come to think of it.
"She kissed me," Pete points out, poking Patrick's shoulder for emphasis. "If you had stayed there for another second you would've seen me turn her down. I don't like her like that, and she's cool with it. We're still friends."
"Well sorry if it looked like you didn't seem to mind by the way you were kind of kissing back.” Patrick is observant, of course. It isn't like he just assumed that Pete enjoyed the kiss. He's not an idiot and knows that when a guy kisses back it tends to mean there's something there that he likes.
"I also told her that I wouldn't mind making out with her in a no strings attached sort of way.” Pete shrugs, slouching a little in a more casual, less seductive sort of way. "Look dude, I'm sorry you jumped to conclusions, but what I'm saying is that I'm not unavailable. In fact, I'm very much available. And if you don't want me to make out with Ashlee Simpson anymore so that I can make out with you instead, I will."
Patrick's jaw drops when Pete says this and he isn't sure whether it's such a good idea to get involved with Pete, with someone who is supposedly one of his best friends at this camp, but his heart is beating so rapidly that his brain can't think. He can't say no at this point and he already knows this.
"So what'll it be?" Pete asks, tapping his foot impatiently. Well, at least Patrick knows this is the Pete Wentz he knows and loves.
"Dude, like you even have to ask.” Patrick snorts as he takes a step closer and steps up on his tiptoes to place a peck on Pete's cheek. "Don't be offended or anything, but you'll get the rest sometime when we're not surrounded by people still."
By the looks of Pete's goofy face, though, Patrick is pretty sure Pete doesn't mind at all. Awesome.
"Tomorrow. After we get you back to riding, you will see just how much I have been waiting for this.” Pete winks and disappears to go back to his group of friends, leaving Patrick confused and yet excited. This would be something to look forward to. It wouldn't be so bad, he thought, combining the riding with the kissing. It would make it easier to deal with this newfound fear he managed to develop.
When Patrick sees Victoria looking thoroughly kissed later, he wonders if Ashlee kissed her or if she moved on. He's beginning to realize that at this camp, things aren't always what they seem. He may have been going here for many summers so far, but never has he paid such close attention to how things worked.
He looks in the corner, for example, to see two people that shouldn't be near each other otherwise making out like it's no big deal. Maybe he's just growing up finally and everyone else already accepted it. Whatever the case may be, he is definitely looking forward to what this year has in store.
…
"Patrick," A voice calls his name and Patrick looks around but he can't find the source. It's dark and there's a fog surrounding him. He sees someone bound to a tree and races to cut the ropes. His heart is pumping so rapidly he thinks it might burst out of his chest.
When he gets close enough to the tree he realizes those aren't ropes but snakes squeezing the victim to the tree. He can't make out who the person is that's tied to the tree, but he knows he needs to free him. That's all that his mind is bent on, but how do you lure a snake away from a tree when it's about to feast?
He doesn't know what to do and he's starting to sense he's too late. That there is nothing he can do but watch this poor innocent soul suffer. He turns around to send for help when he feels a snake curling around his chest. He can't move and the snake restricts further.
"Beware of the Cobra," a voice hisses in his ear. "Do not underestimate our power."
Patrick shoots up in his bunk and nearly hits his head. Thank god he's short enough that it's never an issue.
He looks up to see Pete craning his head down from the bunk above him. He's looking at Patrick curiously and it's a little unnerving. He's just glad Pete isn't the type of person to make fun of him for having such a nightmare.
"You okay?" he whispers. "You look like hell."
Patrick nods, grabbing for his glasses that he placed under his bed so he wouldn't accidentally crack them. "Yeah, just a bad dream. I'll be okay," he whispers back. "Go back to sleep."
"Can't.” Pete frowns as he continues to stare at Patrick. "I've been having trouble sleeping for the past couple of months. Think I might have insomnia or something."
"That's too bad," Patrick whispers, moving over in his bunk. "If you go back before everyone else wakes up, you can sleep here tonight."
This used to be a regular thing for them. On nights when Pete couldn't sleep, he would sleep next to Patrick and things would somehow be okay. The only thing that changed since they started doing this was that Pete's inability to sleep became more frequent. They got older, but other than Pete developing complete insomnia, some things just never changed.
Pete climbs down from his top bunk and slides in next to Patrick without another word. He slips underneath the covers and moves close enough to steal some of Patrick's body heat. Patrick can't help but realize just how much he missed this over the past ten months.
"Your mattress is more comfortable than mine," Pete mumbles into Patrick's neck. "So not fair." That produces a giggle from Patrick, who rolls his eyes and wraps an arm around Pete.
"Guess top bunk's not always better," Patrick whispers back, abandoning his glasses again now that Pete's there. He closes his eyes and hums a few bars of the last song that invaded his mind.
"Nah, but if it means being above you then I'll take one for the team.” Pete grins as he opens one eye to look at Patrick. When Patrick starts humming, that calms him down enough to finally fall asleep.
But by the time Patrick wakes up, Pete has wiggled his way out of his arms and is back in the top bunk. Patrick has no idea if he wished he could have woken up to Pete next to him, but he does feel emptiness in his heart. Though he is glad the other boys didn't catch them snuggling, he knows he would have been content looking into Pete's eyes that morning, no matter what.
He isn't given much time to mope over this though, as before long it's time to get up, the call of the wake up horn raising everyone out of their beds. Time to prepare himself for almost certain humiliation. Assuming he does choose to go riding today, of course.
At breakfast, Pete sits across from him and Victoria takes a seat next to him. It's a little bit awkward until Ashlee sits across from Victoria and they soon realize what is going on.
"So, like, is it true what I hear?" Ashlee asks, turning to Pete. "You and the munchkin?" Patrick is half a second away from scowling until he notices the wink from Ashlee. She doesn't mean him harm. Which is surprising considering what he witnessed the night before.
"Maybe," Pete replies with a shrug. "What's it to you?" Patrick is suddenly glad to have Pete as a friend. He isn't sure that any other guy he managed to have a crush on would defend him like this. In fact, he's pretty sure that any other guy would make fun of him instead.
"I also here there are shenanigans to be had tonight. You teaching the little Stumpkin how to get back on the horse?" she continues with a wide grin on her face. Patrick could possibly die right now but somehow the teasing manner of her voice is making it just slightly okay. But he still wants to kill Pete and her, because seriously. Stumpkin?
"Maybe. I'm not hearing the bulk of your question though. What's up, Simpson? You planning on joining us?"
"Maybe I am," she replies, glancing over at Victoria. "Not to laugh or anything in case Patrick fails horribly, but I do enjoy my nightly rides. Isn't that right, Victoria?"
"That is indeed correct," Victoria replies, giggling and hiding behind her hand. "Okay, okay. We got off to the wrong foot with all the conspiring last night and I thought we could all four of us go out on a ride tonight. If Patrick's up to it, of course."
Patrick gulps as he contemplates this. He really didn't want an audience tonight. He wanted it to be time spent alone with Pete with promises of making out when they were finished with the riding. But maybe it wouldn't be so bad, even with Ashlee and Victoria tagging along.
"Only if Patrick is okay with it," Pete states all high and mighty. Patrick might feel his heart skip a beat, but if he does, he ignores it. It's not important.
"Only if you guys promise to keep the focus away from me. You know how I feel about having the spotlight." Patrick sighs, pretty sure he's making a bad choice with this. He'll find out in due time, he thinks to himself.
"You know us. You won't even know we're there.” Victoria blows a kiss and that's that. They turn the conversation to more inconsequential things, more insignificant. Patrick has an uneasy feeling in his stomach, but all in all, he is looking forward to tonight.
Now he just has to get through the rest of the day.
…
When the sun sets that night, Patrick is exhausted. He didn't ride during lessons and was thankful that his instructor didn't force him up on horseback. He was certain that Pete would be able to get him on horseback that evening. But he did play sports with the other boys. That was at least an activity he knew he wouldn't get injured in to the point of near death.
But now the sun has fallen down beneath the horizon, bringing a chill and bringing darkness over the world around him. Patrick has never been a huge fan of the night, but he might be able to get used to it if it brings him things like Pete and night rides.
After dinner, Patrick, Pete, Victoria, and Ashlee start to leave their cabins for the stables. Pete has gotten permission to take four horses out thanks to his father; sometimes being friends with Pete does have its perks. Patrick feels his hands start to shake but Pete grasps his hand before he can make any sort of move to head back to the cabin.
Ashlee and Victoria have run ahead, excited for their night ride while Pete and Patrick trail behind, hands entwined. Pete leans in close to Patrick and whispers something in his ear.
"I made you a promise last year before you fell off the horse. I intend to keep it. Don't think I haven't forgotten.” Pete kisses Patrick's forehead and then pauses mid-step, stopping Patrick as well to pull him in for a kiss, slow and sensual. Patrick's heart beats so rapidly it's surely about to burst free from his ribcage.
"I didn't think you'd remember," Patrick whispers once they pull back from the kiss. "But thank you. It means a lot." He smiles and tugs at Pete's hand to get him to continue on the path to the stables.
When they arrive at the stables, the four horses are waiting for them in their respective stalls. They get them tacked up with saddles and bridles in record time. All four have taken enough horse care classes to know just how to go about putting this equipment on a horse themselves. Which is a relief, because Patrick isn't sure he wants to watch Pete attempt to show each of them how it's done.
"How's Lila?" Pete asks, poking his head out from the stall he's been in, tightening the girth. He placed his fingers between the girth and the horse's stomach to make sure it's tight enough.
"She's good," Patrick replies, his voice strained. Lila is of course the horse that Pete has given Patrick. She's a horse that doesn't spook easily. Pete did that on purpose to make sure Patrick has the easiest time getting back into the swing of things.
"Excellent. Victoria and Ashlee are gonna be in another ring while we're getting you back in the saddle, so it'll just be me and you, alright?" he asks, leading his horse out of the stall.
"Oh. Good, yeah. That'll be good.” Patrick draws in deep breaths as he strokes Lila's mane and tries to get her calm. A calm horse is a good horse. "At least they're warmed up, right? Won't need to do that."
"That's exactly why I wanted to get them out later rather than before breakfast," says Pete, facing Patrick's stall, his hands tightly holding the reins of his mare underneath her chin. "Meet you in the center ring, okay? Whenever you're ready."
Patrick takes his time getting reacquainted with Lila. He'd ridden her a couple of years ago and she was a fairly good horse back then. He felt the fear running through his veins though, unsure if he would be able to get himself calm again. He knows horses don't usually buck people off. Lila especially. But he can't shake the feeling he felt when he was soaring through the air after his horse reared inexplicably. He nearly saw his life flashing before his eyes before landing.
And now he's supposed to go riding again, like nothing happened.
But deep down, Patrick knows he wants to do this. He wants to show everyone he can triumph over his fears. He's just not sure he really is ready yet.
"Well, Lila. I suppose I can't stall much longer, can I? Shall we show these guys what's what?" Patrick muses, patting her shoulder as he starts leading her out of her stall.
He leads her to the center ring and finds Pete already on top of his horse Bucephalus. Bucephalus happened to be Pete's favorite horse, named fondly after Alexander the Great's horse. Patrick can't help but look at Pete and giggle as he thinks of Pete as Alexander. He knows that Pete would be a really shitty leader.
"There you are," Pete replies, trotting over to Patrick, who is guiding Lila into the center of the ring so he can mount.
"Here I am," Patrick replies with a sigh. This is it; it's now or never. He draws in a deep breath as he checks the lengths of the stirrups so that he won't have to do much tightening while up on the horse. Once Lila is aligned with the mounting block, he steps up onto it, puts his left foot in one stirrup, and pulls himself up so that he's landed himself right in the center of the saddle.
"Welcome back, Trickster," Pete teases as he steers Bucephalus over to Lila. "How's it feel to be back on top?"
Patrick glances over at Pete with a glare, but he's smirking. It does feel kind of nice to be back. He squeezes his feet against Lila's sides to get her to start walking, clucking his tongue for a little help.
"It feels good. Where are the girls?" he asks, bringing Lila around for a warm up, mostly for himself. He isn't sure going right into cantering is such a good idea.
"They're the next ring over," Pete replies, kicking his legs against Bucephalus to get him to trot again. "Let's do some trotting," he calls, trotting the horse around the ring.
Patrick follows suit, tapping his heels against Lila a little bit harder to get her to trot. He posts, using his leg strength to push his ass up out of the saddle and sitting back down again, a motion that some equestrians have managed to deem as appropriate for when trotting. Patrick does have to admit that it's a lot easier to post than sit without bouncing in the saddle.
In the midst of everything, he doesn't see the approaching figures. He's having too much fun feeling the wind blowing against him, focusing on what's right in front of him. He doesn't see the snakes slithering into the ring. Not until it's too late.
Not until Lila rears, and try as he might, Patrick can't hold on; he's too startled to think of grabbing at the horse's neck and struggle to stay on.
It's happening again, he thinks to himself. This time, he's not going to be so lucky. This time…
But there is no this time. Because Patrick doesn't hit the ground. He hits the water. The cold water is such a shock that Patrick forgets to hold his breath and he thinks he's drowning. Oh god, he's drowning, drowning, and this is how he's going to die. In the water instead of in the ring. And he won't even have said goodbye to Pete.
But just when he thinks he's sinking too fast with that helmet and those jodhpurs and the boots, he finds himself back in the ring, stumbling over onto his front. After that, everything goes black.
Part Two