Two weeks. I hadn’t slept well since Christmas. Maybe before that, even, though my certainty beyond that point is hazy.

Christmas sticks out in my memory, not because I celebrate it, but because I went out to the movies with friends - and the particular movie, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, happened to trigger some of my PTSD, even though I’d left the ( Read more... )

I've been pulling
at strings
to untangle this mess.
And finally,
finally,
I'm pulling at the right ones.
(The string tugs back).
Draw tight like the archer's bow,
and plucked like that of a harp,
its note reverberates;
a Soul-resonance. Deep.
It hurts. A painful chord
is played, and I gasp at the ache of it,
as it deafens the outside noise,
until I'm alone with ( Read more... )

Written? Kitten ( Read more... )

It's difficult to lose someone you care about, (I would use the word 'love',  were I sure it still applied. 'Care about' seems safe enough), to mental illness.

That person is never really the same - either that or it's my perception of him. After the drama that happens between the initial break and the road to recovery, can anyone ever really be ( Read more... )

Food is making me ill. The very thought of putting something in my mouth, chewing, swallowing, makes my stomach twitch unhappily.

Why?

Stress, apparently.

Eating when my nerves are frayed upsets my stomach. So I do everything I can think to do to: search for jobs, apartments, calculate my projected finances, make grocery lists, re-budget my ( Read more... )

Around nine this morning, I was dragged, head-first, down my flight of stairs by my schizo-affective ex-boyfriend. I had made the decision at the top of the stairs, when it had become apparent what was about to happen, that I would not let go, nor shield myself for fear of losing my grip. As it was, I had clutched myself so tightly around his leg ( Read more... )

My heart beats like an abusive spouse.
A rhythm of war
drums; a harbinger.

My collected self in a paper bag,
held fast so tightly I bruise.

Foregoing self preservation.
A tumble head-first
down; a choice.

My remains to be rebuilt,
ruins restored to new glory.

Spoilers through season 6 finale!

Click to view

Also? Dean/Cas friendly, cause yeah, I ship that way.

Full moon was two days ago, which mathematically means that it's the sixth day of its power and thus, witchatically, the second day of my 'dirty lady time'.  In layman's terms? It emphatically means fuck you, fuck my life, fuck this shit ( Read more... )

Dear Creators of the Daily Show,

I am writing to you with a request from the entire Neo-Pagan community.

Here is the rest of the Letter to the Daily Show. The FB community is here.

Whatever you believe - discrimination is wrong. Please help me raise support!