You guys, this morning Brian pooped in my bed and I tried to stop him but he wouldn't. No matter how hard I preesed on his hole, poop just somehow eeked around it. He just kept on pooping. dammit.

Take THAT, Randee! I am slutty ruler of you all!


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Things that rock my ass:
Kill Bill (I & II)- blood = best thing ever
Playing frisbee- I like mixing up underhand and overhand throws
chocolate- chocolate
Princess Bride- "You are the brute squad!"
the way it smells right after it rains- pure like my privates
and thorny butt plugs- because "hell yeaaah!"

I have a hippie friend named Kimmi. This last Sunday she had a baby, totaly hippie style. She did it at home with a mid-wife in her bathtub. That's ok, I'm all for mid-wives and underwater births. What I really hate is that she saved her afterbirth. She put it in a tupperware container... and she cooked it. That's right. She cooked her ( Read more... )

I think it's funny when your family is having an easter dinner but they don't invite you because they're eating ham and you're a vegeterian. I mean, that's great. Because all I wanted to do today was have a zombie party anyway. Too bad that didn't turn out. Where have all the zobies gone? There used to be a whole mob of them that would chase ( Read more... )

I'm an Atheist!


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So I work back stage at PopeJoy Hall and today I had the greatest job ever. Forsome reason there is a sewer portal in the vent room. About once a month all of the water in the sewer evaporates and the gases rise into the vent room. The genious that designed the buildnig was super smart because then all the ass gas gets blown into the ENTIRE ( Read more... )

You guys- I am totally terrified of one of my room mates right now. Here's why ( Read more... )

the sole reason that I got on live journal was because of yo-ass. we were supposed to have this philosophy community and talk about interesting stuuf. It was ayear ago today that she commited suicide. how are you guys feeling on this subject? I know that a few months ago an article on her came out in Seventeen magazine- and everyone talked ( Read more... )

In other news- the summer soccer league has started back up again. I played yesterday and it was fun because this guy came with a robot suit he made out of cardboard and silver spray paint. It was lovely to watch the robot frolic in the grassy field and then someone hit him with the soccer ball and his circut board fell off and I laughed