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[whateverthat]

Today I was playing Wii Boxing with my nephew, and he was trying to knock out a computer opponent that looked exactly like Jesus. Quite perceptively, he told me that the reason he couldn't knock him out, and the reason why he kept getting back up, was because today is Easter. He's a smart kid.

I wrote another story, it's behind this link:

Comments

[everonward]

thats awesome. good idea written believably. only, you should consider not referring to jim as "the bum" in the middle of a couple sentences near the beginning... I think in 2 or 3 or so cases "he" would have worked fine, if not better.

[whateverthat]

Yeah, you're definitely right. I could use a re-write with that story, as I could with a lot of the stories I put here... when I was writing it I just wanted to get it down and worry about sorting out the "he" deal later. Just didn't want to confuse myself while I was writing it since they're both dudes

[everonward]

yeah word. I do that sometimes, even when Im drawing cause I know what some tiny part needs to look like, but I know if I spend an hour on two square inches before sketching out the composition of the whole piece i'll forget what else I wanted to put and get the scale all wrong.