On Even Ground (ch 04)
On Even Ground
~part of the Dark Season universe~
Chapter: 4/?
Rating: NC-17
Major Characters: Gamzee, Tavros, Equius, Aradia, Canren (OC)
Warnings: slavery, some violence, lots of swearing, angst, SMUT
Summery: AU where they never played the game. The only way for Tavros to avoid being culled is for a highblood to claim him as their slave. As his matesprite, Gamzee is the obvious choice for this. But Gamzee is severely squicked by the new found power imbalance.
Gamzee’s reservations evaporated as a sultry heat replaced the fire of his rage. Tavros found himself crushed against his lover’s body and he would have moaned if his mouth wasn’t otherwise occupied. The rough kisses opened the self-inflicted bite marks on Tavros’s lip and tongue and the metallic taste made Gamzee pause, but then Tavros was rubbing that particular spot on his hip and nipping at his earlobe just the way he liked it. With no more warning than a primal growl Tavros found himself flat on his back, barely having time to register the change in orientation before Gamzee was nudging his legs apart and lying between them. Tavros propped himself up on his elbows and watched slack jawed as his lover mouthed him. The fact that Gamzee’s tongue was on his own bright green underwear instead of Tavros’s dark boxer briefs just made it that much hotter.
“Yeah, babe, you like that?” Gamzee asked as he tugged the borrowed boxers down and freed Tavros’s aching bulge. He took the tip in his mouth and mumbled around it, “Does that make you feel good?”
“Guh, hu, Gamzaah!” Tavros moaned in answer.
“You are so-“ licksuckkiss, “-motherfucking sexy.”
Tavros was drowning in his insecurities and he clung to Gamzee’s words as he would a raft. “H-h-how am I, uh, ohhhh, s-sexy?”
Gamzee chuckled like Tavros was crazy for even asking. He pressed a wet kiss to his lover’s bulge before getting up and breaking the sound barrier getting to his desk and back. He dropped the bottle on the floor next to them and quickly pulled the boxers completely off Tavros’s legs. It was only after he had settled back down on his stomach and was rubbing slick fingers against Tavros’s entrance that Gamzee answered the question.
“You’re sexy no matter what you do, but fuck Tav when you say my name it keeps me believing in miracles.”
Two fingers pressed inside and curled just so and Tavros bucked against the heat and sting and the way his matesprit grinned when he cried out, “Gamzee!”
“Yeah, fuck yes, like that. That gets me so motherfucking hot when you scream my name.”
“Hah, how c-can I not-mmph-scream your name when you do... ohhh...”
Tavros wanted hard and fast, wanted to feel the heat of Gamzee’s wild passion washing over him, but Gamzee slowed his pace to something tortuously slow. Tavros whined and tried to wriggle closer to that teasing mouth and probing fingers, but his lover kept him pinned.
“I was worried,” Gamzee said in a near whisper; Tavros had to fight to control his panting breaths just to make out all the words. “Back when we were all new at this, you know, the first time I got my hands on that cute fucking ass of yours.”
“We’re, uh, talking about sexy.”
The grin was back. “Your ass is cute and sexy. So’s your big thick motherfucking bone bulmg,” he said, the last word getting muffled when Gamzee leaned back down to suck on said bulge. Tavros blushed not only from the pleasure Gamzee was giving him but also the compliment. Tavros was bigger than Gamzee by a tiny bit; still, Gamzee loved telling him how huge he was and watching the deep brown blush spread all the way down his abdomen.
Gamzee pulled back again, lazily stroking Tavros’s bulge with one hand and twisting the fingers of the other inside him, so he could take in the sight of his lover squirming under him.
“I was worried,” he repeated. “So fucking worried, first time I got in your pants... I didn’t know if you could feel what I was doing. Didn’t know if I could make you feel good like a motherfucker should be able to make his matesprit feel.”
Tavros shook his head. “No, mhm, even if I couldn’t feel your fff-AH-fingers in m-me it would still be, uh, good. Because i-it would be with you.”
The indigo blush under Gamzee’s eyes darkened and he licked his lips. “So... can you feel my fingers all up inside of you?”
When Tavros fell off that cliff during his last FLARP session the impact itself didn’t break his spine; if that were the case then the break probably would have been much higher and he might not have been able to feel anything below the waist. Instead when Tavros fell he landed flat on his back and a slab of rock protruding from the sandy beach caught him nearly at the base of his spine. He still had minimal movement and most of the feeling in his hips, fading down to being completely numb at about mid thigh.
Gamzee might have been ignorant of the extent of Tavros’s injury that first time they were fumbling around in the dark, but that was almost two sweeps ago and Gamzee had been educated since.
“Uh... y-you know already,” Tavros mumbled as he looked away, embarrassed by the question.
Gamzee pulled his hand away from Tavros’s bulge and he withdrew his slick fingers. Tavros whimpered at the loss of sensation. He raised himself back up on his elbows so he could glare at his matesprit, though it came off as less of a glare and more of a pout. Gamzee was undeterred. He slid his hands up Tavros’s thighs ever so slowly, coming to rest on his hips. Gamzee pressed down just hard enough that it would be difficult for Tavros to flip him and exact revenge for the teasing.
“Come on, babe, I’m asking you if you can feel what I’m doing to you. Tell me how it feels when I’m inside you.”
The hunger in Gamzee’s tone was making Tavros’s breath hitch. He was still embarrassed, still nervous, but there was no way he could say no to that.
“Will you, uh, t-tell me why you th-think I’m sexy?”
Gamzee’s eyes smoldered. He moved onto his knees and spread more of the gel over his hard bulge, giving Tavros the most intense look as he slowly stroked himself. Tavros licked his lips at the sight. Then Gamzee was shifting them both around and Tavros was doing his best to arch his back and help lift his legs and then Gamzee was sliding into him.
“That look,” Gamzee murmured once he was fully sheathed, “that look you get when I’m in you and you’re all about to moan but you’re trying not to...” He closed his eyes and gasped. “Fuck, Tav, you have no motherfucking clue what you do to me, do you?”
Tavros worried at his sore lip and reveled in Gamzee’s words. As Gamzee started grinding against him tried to swallow his embarrassment. He didn’t think he was very good at dirty talk so he tended to leave that to Gamzee. But since his lover was outright asking for it he was willing to try.
“I, uh, y-you inside me f-feels so good...” He somehow managed to blush darker than he already was. “Gyah! I’m so bad at this.”
Gamzee chuckled as he settled into a slow and steady grind, the friction making Tavros throw his head back and cry out wordlessly.
“Babe, trust me, no one could be better.”
Tavros felt almost drunk after hearing that. From somewhere in the hull of his shattered self esteem he drug up the confidence to keep talking.
“When y-you’re, mmm, rubbing up against me-in m-me-all slow like this it’s, uh, amazing.”
“Tav, oh shit,” Gamzee moaned. He started moving in shallow thrusts as he reached down to stroke Tavros’s bulge.
“Ohhh... and wh-when you touch me like that I can’t even think anymore.”
“Yes. Fuck yes. Don’t motherfucking stop.”
Tavros watched his lover with fascination. His attempts at dirty talk were terrible but it was still having such an effect on Gamzee. He tried to think of something else to say while making a vague mental note to get better at this.
“When you roll your hips-ohgodlikethat-it feels so good.”
“Uhng... Tav, babe, tell me what you want.”
Tavros started to answer but then Gamzee thrust inside him at a particularly delicious angle. The world went dark around the edges and Tavros shoved off the floor hard enough that Gamzee was almost knocked backwards. Tavros felt himself coming undone and he cried out his lover’s name as he toppled over the edge.
“I... hah...” Tavros tried to catch his breath as he floated back down to reality. “I think that, mmh, was what I wanted.”
Gamzee was still in Tavros and still hard. He was fighting his own instincts to move to the point of shaking, but despite the effort tied up in staying still he was smiling down at Tavros with an almost zen look.
“Mmmm...” Gazmee hummed as he ground against Tavros just a bit. “Watching you coming all undone, babe, that is motherfucking miracles.”
The words fell from Tavros’s lips without him really thinking about it, “Feeling you moving inside me when I’m riding the aftershocks is like paradise.”
Gamzee paused and on instinct Tavros wondered if he said something wrong. Then Gamzee was thrusting into him hard and moaning, “Fuck, Tav. Motherfucking. Yes.”
Tavros, still drifting through the aftermath of his orgasm, watched his lover with a sort of lazy fascination. Gamzee was so intense and somehow it was all because of something Tavros just did. Even though he was awkward and stuttery and not the handsomest on Alternia, Gamzee still found something about him irresistible.
“Wha... mm...” Gamzee’s thrusts were getting rough and it felt so good, but Tavros was determined to figure out what he did to make his matesprit moan like that. “What did I say?”
Gamzee laughed through a groan. “God, babe, you really have no fucking clue, do you? You have no motherfucking idea how hot you are. How can that even happen?”
Tavros didn’t answer right away; he thought about the question with a fuzzy think pan as he reached down to absently rub at his softening bulge. He saw the way Gamzee leaned back to get a good look at what he was doing.
Sometimes when he was exhausted or angry Tavros would somehow forget to be nervous and just say or do what he was thinking without censoring himself. At that moment he was physically exhausted since he had barely slept in the past few days, emotional exhausted from the spectacle the ceremony turned into, his anger was still lurking under the surface, and to top it all off he was very sexually satisfied.
Tavros gave his bulge one last squeeze and then drug his hand up across his abdomen. When he reached the pool of genetic discharge on his chest he drug two fingers through the fluid, then he brought his hand to his lips and licked at his own release.
Gamzee stilled for several long seconds and stared wide eyed at the gray tongue lapping up the light brown fluid. Then he was leaning over Tavros and fucking him in earnest while words tumbled from his lips.
“Oh god, Tav. When you’re nervous and mumbling it’s all motherfucking adorable but when you blow right past it and do shit like that-ah fuck.”
Gamzee’s hands were nearly bruising on his matesprit’s hips. Tavros sucked on his sticky fingers, swallowing the traces of his genetic fluid and driving Gamzee mad with desire in the process.
“You’re so sexy. You’re so motherfucking sexy. When you’re all in your four wheel device and you look up at me all shy, uhn, it takes all I got to keep from jumping your cute, perfect, sexy ass.”
Gamzee’s motions were getting erratic and his voice was starting to resemble his Trollian quirk, the syllables butchered and the meter of his words cracked and backwards. Tavros knew his lover was close, so close.
“Babe-motherfucking yes-when you stare out at the ocean and the wind is all ruffling that fucking cute mohawk of yours, uhn, and you’ve got that smile on your face that’s all mysterious and, and-“
“I love you, Gamzee.”
“Sonova bitch, oh fuck, Taaaaaav!”
Gamzee pulled out and grabbed his bulge. After a couple rough jerks pale indigo release was mingling with the cooling brown on Tavros’s chest. Gamzee slumped forward, catching his weight with one hand so he didn’t fall into Tavros, and tried to steady his breath. Tavros reached up to brush damp bangs out of his lover’s eyes. He was still reveling in the way his skin tingled where Gamzee had touched him. Still reeling from the fact that saying ‘I love you’ is what sent his matesprit over the edge.
“I love you too, Tavros,” Gamzee said at last, his face full of tenderness that warmed Tavros to the core. “You’re amazing, you’re... you are the best motherfucking thing that ever happened to me.”
Tavros felt relief wash over him at the reaffirmation of his matesprit’s feelings. He felt a little ashamed for doubting it even for a second, regardless of what happened that day. Gamzee loved him and that was a fact.
Gamzee’s expression melted into something that was both affectionate and dangerously mischievous. With a low chuckle he reached out with his free hand and drew a finger through their combined genetic material. He sucked the pale substance off with a hum, never taking his eyes off Tavros’s, even as he shuddered in the wake of his orgasm. Tavros watched the tremors roll over his lover in waves and thought, I did that to him.
“That is motherfucking hot,” Gamzee said in a husky voice. “I never guessed you’d be all into that. Fuck, if you want to take me out you know how to motherfucking do it. Just suck on your fingers like that and uhnn...”
Gamzee loved him and that was a fact. But the thing that Tavros struggled with wasn’t faith in the depth of Gamzee’s emotions, it was the depth of Gamzee’s lust. He knew that his matesprit wanted him as a person, and he knew that was the more important part of the relationship, but Tavros always wondered if Gamzee really wanted him physically. It wasn’t about the disjunction between a powerful torso and atrophied legs; at least, it hadn’t been for almost a sweep. It was about his facial structure and the embarrassingly needy noises he’d make during sex and the way he would trip and fall over his own words sometimes. When Gamzee called him cute he could believe it, but sexy? Hot? That couldn’t be him.
Except Gamzee was coming down from being driven mad with desire. When Tavros licked his own release off his fingers the look on Gamzee’s face right before he started driving into his lover’s body left little room for interpretation. There was no faking that. Tavros didn’t have any doubt left.
Gamzee both loved him and wanted him.
It wasn’t until Gamzee’s expression turned to one of deep concern that Tavros even realized he was crying again. He was just so relieved to finally know and believe and not have any doubt about Gamzee’s feelings or lust. Tavros was loved and wanted and the horrible day was over and he was finally safe in his matesprit’s arms and hive and...
Tavros lost track of time and then he was sobbing brokenly while Gamzee was holding him tight. Tavros was vaguely aware of how badly Gamzee was panicking, the only thing really getting through was the stream of “I’m sorry” repeated over and over until it blended into a pulse beating in his head. He tried to tell Gamzee it was okay, he tried so hard, but he was just too tired and too hurt to get past the lump in his throat. So he cried and he clung and somewhere in there he fell asleep.
~part of the Dark Season universe~
Chapter: 4/?
Rating: NC-17
Major Characters: Gamzee, Tavros, Equius, Aradia, Canren (OC)
Warnings: slavery, some violence, lots of swearing, angst, SMUT
Summery: AU where they never played the game. The only way for Tavros to avoid being culled is for a highblood to claim him as their slave. As his matesprite, Gamzee is the obvious choice for this. But Gamzee is severely squicked by the new found power imbalance.
Gamzee’s reservations evaporated as a sultry heat replaced the fire of his rage. Tavros found himself crushed against his lover’s body and he would have moaned if his mouth wasn’t otherwise occupied. The rough kisses opened the self-inflicted bite marks on Tavros’s lip and tongue and the metallic taste made Gamzee pause, but then Tavros was rubbing that particular spot on his hip and nipping at his earlobe just the way he liked it. With no more warning than a primal growl Tavros found himself flat on his back, barely having time to register the change in orientation before Gamzee was nudging his legs apart and lying between them. Tavros propped himself up on his elbows and watched slack jawed as his lover mouthed him. The fact that Gamzee’s tongue was on his own bright green underwear instead of Tavros’s dark boxer briefs just made it that much hotter.
“Yeah, babe, you like that?” Gamzee asked as he tugged the borrowed boxers down and freed Tavros’s aching bulge. He took the tip in his mouth and mumbled around it, “Does that make you feel good?”
“Guh, hu, Gamzaah!” Tavros moaned in answer.
“You are so-“ licksuckkiss, “-motherfucking sexy.”
Tavros was drowning in his insecurities and he clung to Gamzee’s words as he would a raft. “H-h-how am I, uh, ohhhh, s-sexy?”
Gamzee chuckled like Tavros was crazy for even asking. He pressed a wet kiss to his lover’s bulge before getting up and breaking the sound barrier getting to his desk and back. He dropped the bottle on the floor next to them and quickly pulled the boxers completely off Tavros’s legs. It was only after he had settled back down on his stomach and was rubbing slick fingers against Tavros’s entrance that Gamzee answered the question.
“You’re sexy no matter what you do, but fuck Tav when you say my name it keeps me believing in miracles.”
Two fingers pressed inside and curled just so and Tavros bucked against the heat and sting and the way his matesprit grinned when he cried out, “Gamzee!”
“Yeah, fuck yes, like that. That gets me so motherfucking hot when you scream my name.”
“Hah, how c-can I not-mmph-scream your name when you do... ohhh...”
Tavros wanted hard and fast, wanted to feel the heat of Gamzee’s wild passion washing over him, but Gamzee slowed his pace to something tortuously slow. Tavros whined and tried to wriggle closer to that teasing mouth and probing fingers, but his lover kept him pinned.
“I was worried,” Gamzee said in a near whisper; Tavros had to fight to control his panting breaths just to make out all the words. “Back when we were all new at this, you know, the first time I got my hands on that cute fucking ass of yours.”
“We’re, uh, talking about sexy.”
The grin was back. “Your ass is cute and sexy. So’s your big thick motherfucking bone bulmg,” he said, the last word getting muffled when Gamzee leaned back down to suck on said bulge. Tavros blushed not only from the pleasure Gamzee was giving him but also the compliment. Tavros was bigger than Gamzee by a tiny bit; still, Gamzee loved telling him how huge he was and watching the deep brown blush spread all the way down his abdomen.
Gamzee pulled back again, lazily stroking Tavros’s bulge with one hand and twisting the fingers of the other inside him, so he could take in the sight of his lover squirming under him.
“I was worried,” he repeated. “So fucking worried, first time I got in your pants... I didn’t know if you could feel what I was doing. Didn’t know if I could make you feel good like a motherfucker should be able to make his matesprit feel.”
Tavros shook his head. “No, mhm, even if I couldn’t feel your fff-AH-fingers in m-me it would still be, uh, good. Because i-it would be with you.”
The indigo blush under Gamzee’s eyes darkened and he licked his lips. “So... can you feel my fingers all up inside of you?”
When Tavros fell off that cliff during his last FLARP session the impact itself didn’t break his spine; if that were the case then the break probably would have been much higher and he might not have been able to feel anything below the waist. Instead when Tavros fell he landed flat on his back and a slab of rock protruding from the sandy beach caught him nearly at the base of his spine. He still had minimal movement and most of the feeling in his hips, fading down to being completely numb at about mid thigh.
Gamzee might have been ignorant of the extent of Tavros’s injury that first time they were fumbling around in the dark, but that was almost two sweeps ago and Gamzee had been educated since.
“Uh... y-you know already,” Tavros mumbled as he looked away, embarrassed by the question.
Gamzee pulled his hand away from Tavros’s bulge and he withdrew his slick fingers. Tavros whimpered at the loss of sensation. He raised himself back up on his elbows so he could glare at his matesprit, though it came off as less of a glare and more of a pout. Gamzee was undeterred. He slid his hands up Tavros’s thighs ever so slowly, coming to rest on his hips. Gamzee pressed down just hard enough that it would be difficult for Tavros to flip him and exact revenge for the teasing.
“Come on, babe, I’m asking you if you can feel what I’m doing to you. Tell me how it feels when I’m inside you.”
The hunger in Gamzee’s tone was making Tavros’s breath hitch. He was still embarrassed, still nervous, but there was no way he could say no to that.
“Will you, uh, t-tell me why you th-think I’m sexy?”
Gamzee’s eyes smoldered. He moved onto his knees and spread more of the gel over his hard bulge, giving Tavros the most intense look as he slowly stroked himself. Tavros licked his lips at the sight. Then Gamzee was shifting them both around and Tavros was doing his best to arch his back and help lift his legs and then Gamzee was sliding into him.
“That look,” Gamzee murmured once he was fully sheathed, “that look you get when I’m in you and you’re all about to moan but you’re trying not to...” He closed his eyes and gasped. “Fuck, Tav, you have no motherfucking clue what you do to me, do you?”
Tavros worried at his sore lip and reveled in Gamzee’s words. As Gamzee started grinding against him tried to swallow his embarrassment. He didn’t think he was very good at dirty talk so he tended to leave that to Gamzee. But since his lover was outright asking for it he was willing to try.
“I, uh, y-you inside me f-feels so good...” He somehow managed to blush darker than he already was. “Gyah! I’m so bad at this.”
Gamzee chuckled as he settled into a slow and steady grind, the friction making Tavros throw his head back and cry out wordlessly.
“Babe, trust me, no one could be better.”
Tavros felt almost drunk after hearing that. From somewhere in the hull of his shattered self esteem he drug up the confidence to keep talking.
“When y-you’re, mmm, rubbing up against me-in m-me-all slow like this it’s, uh, amazing.”
“Tav, oh shit,” Gamzee moaned. He started moving in shallow thrusts as he reached down to stroke Tavros’s bulge.
“Ohhh... and wh-when you touch me like that I can’t even think anymore.”
“Yes. Fuck yes. Don’t motherfucking stop.”
Tavros watched his lover with fascination. His attempts at dirty talk were terrible but it was still having such an effect on Gamzee. He tried to think of something else to say while making a vague mental note to get better at this.
“When you roll your hips-ohgodlikethat-it feels so good.”
“Uhng... Tav, babe, tell me what you want.”
Tavros started to answer but then Gamzee thrust inside him at a particularly delicious angle. The world went dark around the edges and Tavros shoved off the floor hard enough that Gamzee was almost knocked backwards. Tavros felt himself coming undone and he cried out his lover’s name as he toppled over the edge.
“I... hah...” Tavros tried to catch his breath as he floated back down to reality. “I think that, mmh, was what I wanted.”
Gamzee was still in Tavros and still hard. He was fighting his own instincts to move to the point of shaking, but despite the effort tied up in staying still he was smiling down at Tavros with an almost zen look.
“Mmmm...” Gazmee hummed as he ground against Tavros just a bit. “Watching you coming all undone, babe, that is motherfucking miracles.”
The words fell from Tavros’s lips without him really thinking about it, “Feeling you moving inside me when I’m riding the aftershocks is like paradise.”
Gamzee paused and on instinct Tavros wondered if he said something wrong. Then Gamzee was thrusting into him hard and moaning, “Fuck, Tav. Motherfucking. Yes.”
Tavros, still drifting through the aftermath of his orgasm, watched his lover with a sort of lazy fascination. Gamzee was so intense and somehow it was all because of something Tavros just did. Even though he was awkward and stuttery and not the handsomest on Alternia, Gamzee still found something about him irresistible.
“Wha... mm...” Gamzee’s thrusts were getting rough and it felt so good, but Tavros was determined to figure out what he did to make his matesprit moan like that. “What did I say?”
Gamzee laughed through a groan. “God, babe, you really have no fucking clue, do you? You have no motherfucking idea how hot you are. How can that even happen?”
Tavros didn’t answer right away; he thought about the question with a fuzzy think pan as he reached down to absently rub at his softening bulge. He saw the way Gamzee leaned back to get a good look at what he was doing.
Sometimes when he was exhausted or angry Tavros would somehow forget to be nervous and just say or do what he was thinking without censoring himself. At that moment he was physically exhausted since he had barely slept in the past few days, emotional exhausted from the spectacle the ceremony turned into, his anger was still lurking under the surface, and to top it all off he was very sexually satisfied.
Tavros gave his bulge one last squeeze and then drug his hand up across his abdomen. When he reached the pool of genetic discharge on his chest he drug two fingers through the fluid, then he brought his hand to his lips and licked at his own release.
Gamzee stilled for several long seconds and stared wide eyed at the gray tongue lapping up the light brown fluid. Then he was leaning over Tavros and fucking him in earnest while words tumbled from his lips.
“Oh god, Tav. When you’re nervous and mumbling it’s all motherfucking adorable but when you blow right past it and do shit like that-ah fuck.”
Gamzee’s hands were nearly bruising on his matesprit’s hips. Tavros sucked on his sticky fingers, swallowing the traces of his genetic fluid and driving Gamzee mad with desire in the process.
“You’re so sexy. You’re so motherfucking sexy. When you’re all in your four wheel device and you look up at me all shy, uhn, it takes all I got to keep from jumping your cute, perfect, sexy ass.”
Gamzee’s motions were getting erratic and his voice was starting to resemble his Trollian quirk, the syllables butchered and the meter of his words cracked and backwards. Tavros knew his lover was close, so close.
“Babe-motherfucking yes-when you stare out at the ocean and the wind is all ruffling that fucking cute mohawk of yours, uhn, and you’ve got that smile on your face that’s all mysterious and, and-“
“I love you, Gamzee.”
“Sonova bitch, oh fuck, Taaaaaav!”
Gamzee pulled out and grabbed his bulge. After a couple rough jerks pale indigo release was mingling with the cooling brown on Tavros’s chest. Gamzee slumped forward, catching his weight with one hand so he didn’t fall into Tavros, and tried to steady his breath. Tavros reached up to brush damp bangs out of his lover’s eyes. He was still reveling in the way his skin tingled where Gamzee had touched him. Still reeling from the fact that saying ‘I love you’ is what sent his matesprit over the edge.
“I love you too, Tavros,” Gamzee said at last, his face full of tenderness that warmed Tavros to the core. “You’re amazing, you’re... you are the best motherfucking thing that ever happened to me.”
Tavros felt relief wash over him at the reaffirmation of his matesprit’s feelings. He felt a little ashamed for doubting it even for a second, regardless of what happened that day. Gamzee loved him and that was a fact.
Gamzee’s expression melted into something that was both affectionate and dangerously mischievous. With a low chuckle he reached out with his free hand and drew a finger through their combined genetic material. He sucked the pale substance off with a hum, never taking his eyes off Tavros’s, even as he shuddered in the wake of his orgasm. Tavros watched the tremors roll over his lover in waves and thought, I did that to him.
“That is motherfucking hot,” Gamzee said in a husky voice. “I never guessed you’d be all into that. Fuck, if you want to take me out you know how to motherfucking do it. Just suck on your fingers like that and uhnn...”
Gamzee loved him and that was a fact. But the thing that Tavros struggled with wasn’t faith in the depth of Gamzee’s emotions, it was the depth of Gamzee’s lust. He knew that his matesprit wanted him as a person, and he knew that was the more important part of the relationship, but Tavros always wondered if Gamzee really wanted him physically. It wasn’t about the disjunction between a powerful torso and atrophied legs; at least, it hadn’t been for almost a sweep. It was about his facial structure and the embarrassingly needy noises he’d make during sex and the way he would trip and fall over his own words sometimes. When Gamzee called him cute he could believe it, but sexy? Hot? That couldn’t be him.
Except Gamzee was coming down from being driven mad with desire. When Tavros licked his own release off his fingers the look on Gamzee’s face right before he started driving into his lover’s body left little room for interpretation. There was no faking that. Tavros didn’t have any doubt left.
Gamzee both loved him and wanted him.
It wasn’t until Gamzee’s expression turned to one of deep concern that Tavros even realized he was crying again. He was just so relieved to finally know and believe and not have any doubt about Gamzee’s feelings or lust. Tavros was loved and wanted and the horrible day was over and he was finally safe in his matesprit’s arms and hive and...
Tavros lost track of time and then he was sobbing brokenly while Gamzee was holding him tight. Tavros was vaguely aware of how badly Gamzee was panicking, the only thing really getting through was the stream of “I’m sorry” repeated over and over until it blended into a pulse beating in his head. He tried to tell Gamzee it was okay, he tried so hard, but he was just too tired and too hurt to get past the lump in his throat. So he cried and he clung and somewhere in there he fell asleep.