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[wheres_romeo]

Mel is telling me to write in here to keep me occupied. I want to purge...but I am trying to fight it. A big part of me doesn't think I can make it through tonight. If it gets bad (which I am scared...because it's getting that bad) she is going to be calling the ambulance. I am so scared. I said to her that I don't want to go and that it's not that

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[xdreamxforeverx]

i love you.
i love you.
i love you.
[hugs tightly]
i'm always here, okay?
you're always welcome at my house.
we can meet up tomorrow if you want/need to.
i love you so much.
♥ ♥ ♥

[knowyourright]

i wish i could help, but i guess only you can help yourself.
*sends strength*

[wheres_romeo]

Melinda made a deal with me that if I felt that I couldn't make it through the night, emotionally, mentally, anxiety wise...plus all the self harm I have been doing, then I have to msg her and she would call the ambulance. At one point, yes suicide was an option. Hence the reason I am only allowed 4 sleeping tablets, not the whole pack.

I know that they care. I just wish that they would understand that their actions hit me really hard. Well...the eating disorder completely blows them out of proportion...but I can't help it. I don't think that my dad ever notices that.

[golddustme]

Juliet don't give up. Giving in and doing self destructive things isn't YOU winning. It's letting "them" win. Your giving your power up to people and to a disease who do NOT deserve it. No one has the right to take your power sweetie. No one wins in the end---death is not an answer. You are here for a reason. God brought you onto this earth for a purpose. I know now it feels dark and helpless and like living is torture but you can't give in. Don't give in--fight and fight hard. IT's a battle Juliet and you can win it.
love,
me