Comments | whetherwoman: Class privilege, and not the kind where you get to be the one to hand out papers

whetherwoman

Class privilege, and not the kind where you get to be the one to hand out papers

Mar 31, 2010 15:52

... So apparently I get all indignant and defensive when I feel like someone implies I don't work hard for my money, even though yes, my rich parents do give me money in addition to the money I work for. Such an upper-middle-class cliche. Sigh. Why is it so hard to remember (and really BELIEVE) that objections to privilege are really, really Not ( Read more... )

Comments 6

zapthatmonster April 1 2010, 02:55:22 UTC

I am sitting on the floor in Massachusetts, but I definitely want to have a more in-depth conversation with you on this subject. Cassia appears to, as well - as does her three-legged cat, Foofy, who is spreading her saliva on my hand. This comment is a placeholder.

<3 WE MISS YOU, MARINA. Foofy doesn't.

sirdentofdoom April 1 2010, 08:23:46 UTC

If/when we are in Portland at the same time, can we have lots of coffee and talks about this and other things? And then possibly rest our brains with Doctor Who?

zapthatmonster April 5 2010, 01:12:29 UTC

Um, yes, yes, and yes.

sirdentofdoom April 1 2010, 08:07:23 UTC

What surprises me is that I convince myself thatI don't care, but I feel the same as you. I HATE when people imply I'm spoiled, to the point where I almost can't stop myself from rolling out the reasons why I'm not (I work twelve hour shifts in a hot kitchen. I spend six hours a day doing uni work. I volunteer in my free time, and I do that job well. Etc.) See? I compulsively feel like I have to give reasons why I'm NOT. But the truth is, I'm probably so sensitive because in a way I AM spoiled - my parents completely financially support me. They pay for school and rent and my plane ticket. I have a scholarship for most of tuition and I pay for all my books/extra school finances, but they support me. I pay for the things outside of school, like backpacking around Europe for a month, and taking a road trip around the states. And people seem to take that fact to mean that I'm ignorant of finances, of hard work, of any unpleasantness relating to money. And once again, I feel compelled to point out a thousand reasons why not. I am so ( ... )

wolftracks April 1 2010, 15:18:46 UTC

I think the way I use the word "spoiled" is more an index of entitlement behavior than of work ethic. People might not work hard for all kinds of reasons-- some of which are direct consequences of oppression, some of which are only possible because of that oppression.

The way I conceptualize it, spoiled behavior indicates very privileged expectations, not only about one's place in the world, but about how the world works, or ought to work. Maybe this is why some people I know equate being spoiled with being sheltered or naive. But I would argue that being spoiled has little to do with interactions with money directly, or even with experiences with effort and success-- it's bigger than that.

anonymous June 1 2010, 10:21:11 UTC

No, I think "spoiled" might mean "not appreciating what you have." People don't begrudge really grateful people nearly as much, even if they have the world--mansions, servants, cars, wonderful good, etc. Sometimes people even feel happy for others when they have a lot, so watch your attitude. Maybe that's the problem? Humans are fickle, and will turn quickly to being hateful when they feel threatened and believe someone is not gracious.