general whining, contd.

[liberta]

To not clog up the introduction post too much (lol, who cares), whine in here. Feel free to open your own post for longer whines, but this one is open, too :)

Comments

[dreamofthem]

WAIT NO, this is my writing life. Once I wrote a fic and had to research Jay-Z's business empire even though he didn't even feature in the fic. :(

[acchikocchi]

I keep thinking I'm making, like, important plot breakthroughs that will fix all my problems and I get all excited and then like an hour later I realize actually it won't work after all. SO TIRED OF THIS ROLLER COASTER.

[acchikocchi]

also posting things where all kinds of people you don't know are forced to look at them skjflsjfdf I wish I wasn't so goddamned self-conscious. :| :| :|

[acchikocchi]

Like, if someone chooses to click on an fbslash link, or a cornerflag link, or check out my journal, that's one thing? because they chose to do it. (even though community posting occasionally freaks me out. apparently I'm allergic to self-promotion, idek.) but... idk how to explain it. places where the people there didn't ask for your fic and who do you think you are shoving it in their face. this was my hang up with distira's awesome finish-your-WIP meme. (note to distira: IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S COMPLETELY ME, it was successful and you should do it again something.) it was great to have daily check-ins to force myself to be accountable to the public, but posting excerpts of what I'd written was like. CRUSHING SHAME. who wants to read that.

tldr I'm paranoid about being judged. XD

(♥ for you though, especially for um dealing with FEELINGSPLOSION here. this comm was a brilliant invention.)

[acchikocchi]

while I am happy to have finished a draft of more of this freakishly unending fic, it's not long enough for a complete update so I can't post it and even though I know what happens next and where a good cutoff point is and that it's probably only a couple thousand words away... I just can't get started. it's really hard writing in a vacuum. D:

also I'm kind of terrified the reason I haven't heard back from anyone about it is that it's really as boring as I thought it was. :|

[acchikocchi]

also the get to know you meme on fbslash where everyone talked about how they disliked WIPs has seriously messed with my head. I already have sort of a weird complex about, like, imposing things on people that they don't want and this is not really helping. sorry, guys, it's the only way I'm going to get it finished (see above, re: really hard writing in a vacuum), so.

[acchikocchi]

kdsfajdsfjdljfdlf I will try. thank you. <3

[acchikocchi]

argh writing woes now augmented by classic personal insecurity i.e. if I'm not good enough no one will love meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

this is possibly not the right fodder for this comm. OH WELL. I am just happy to be able to blurt my ~feelings~ out in a comment somewhere and move on. skjfdalfsdf this comm is perfect for me, good job liberta.

[acchikocchi]

I think we have an awful lot of personality traits in common, that's for sure. XD thank you, sweetie, it's good to hear. ♥

[acchikocchi]

SEND THEM TO ME

unless you did already

[acchikocchi]

I REPEAT: LIKE MAGIC.

also kjsdfjakfjslfjld thank you what a nice thing to do. surprise comments in my inbox this morning was like the best thing everrr.