The Snap King

[whipchick]

I have heard of a thing called, a blackout, and it is not the same. Mrs. Whelker told me that there is a thing called, alcohol, and that sometimes Mature Adults engage in drinking alcohol and even though it does not taste nice at first it can start tasting nice and then a Mature Adult might fail to observe Appropriate Limits. But Mrs. Whelker, I

Comments

[yachiru]

In the top three of things I read in Idol that make me want to write better.

Definitely reminds me of science fiction that's all about current events/trends and what they might become. I would look into Daily Science Fiction for this! They take small pieces and this reads like something they'd dig.

[whipchick]

Thank you - that is soooo mutual. I will look up Daily Science Fiction!

[lrig_rorrim]

I believe DSF has a hard limit of 1500 words, but they pay good money (pro rates for spec fic) and it's good exposure. It might be worth trimming to get it down, but I can give you a list of a bunch of other markets I think this would be a good fit for, too (spec fic is exactly where I'm doing all my submitting and reading these days). Send me an email to remind me.

[ceelove]

Part of a YA book? I would Kickfund that.

[whipchick]

Wow, thanks - I would actually like to write more of this guy and this world, so I'm glad to hear it caught you!

[bleodswean]

A contemporary Benjy? I applaud your use of punctuation and vernacular.

[whipchick]

Tell me who Benjy is? because now I want to read whatever that is! And thanks!

[bleodswean]

Benjy is Faulkner's AMAZING opening narrator for "The Sound and The Fury". I'm not suggesting in any way that your narrator is as crippled, but the use of such similar sotto voce put me very much in mind of Benjamin.

Really enjoying the hell out of your entries this season. And I read your piece about your first novel and identified with it very, very much. My first novel has recently begun to be a source of awkward confusion for me and the conclusions you draw in your article are going a long way towards helping me realigning myself with my early work. So THANK YOU!

[alycewilson]

Terrific use of voice. What I like best about this is the way that you reveal insights into this character that he himself if not aware of, at least in a conscious way. His way of thinking reminds me very much of kids on the autistic spectrum, especially the lack of affect (until the end).

[whipchick]

Thank you - exactly what I was shooting for!

[rayaso]

This is a terrific entry! I loved the humor in it. The voice here is so strong and so well done, and the use of grammar is very effective. The literalness of Jaykob plus the social issues is excellent.

[whipchick]

Thanks very much! I had a great time playing with voice :)