Anger

[whispy]

Anger is such a powerful emotion. Depending on the situation, it can be an emotion that provides positive results, or results that can be devestating, leading up to potentially abusive situations. It's an emotion that is freely expressed by all people, and one that every person is entitled to experience and feel. That hasn't been the case with me

Comments

[purple_roses]

This is why Jon and I aren't 24/7. I'm too independent to be told how to handle my own booboo's. If I need help with a cut, I'll ask for it. *shrug*

I've been told by some that this makes me a bad submissive, but some doms find it more exciting to have a dominate woman outside the bedroom. They feel it takes more of a dom to control her in bed. And then many doms can't stand me. ;)

I wish I knew what to tell you exactly, but it sounds like y'all need to "draw a line" at which you can be a big girl and handle it yourself vs. following orders from your Master.

my 2 cents

[sewblue]

I think the greatest thing you can do for your relationship is learn to forgive yourself. Face it, nobody's really 'happy' about the way they deal with anger. Some people just deal with it differently than others. You didn't hit anybody. You didn't curse out anybody. You got a little upset because you cut your hand. Your Master doesn't always handle his anger well does he?
I don't see why you're being so hard on yourself.

Offer him a casual "I'm sorry about last night, I know you were just trying to help". That should be enough. You haven't 'betrayed' him in any way, I think it's a good thing to keep a little stubborness even in a 24/7 D/s relationship. It's what makes you separate people.

The best relationships are able to overlook the small things. This is definitely a small thing. Cheer up! And feel better :)

Suggestions?

[demonicanevil]

If it's OK with you, I can offer the suggestion that worked best for me and my Master when dealing with anger and stress between us.

It took me a long time to realize that I was dealing with my anger and frustration in much the same way as you did yours last night. I came out of a relatively abusive relationship as well, and I found myself dealing with my daddy in much the same way as I dealt with the unhealthy relationship between my ex and I.

Eventually, I decided that when I found myself that angry, it would be better for me to remove myself totally from my daddy's presence and work out my feelings than sit around and let them grow. After this cooling period, I would come back to calmly and respectfully let my Master know of my feelings. This gave both of us a chance to put things into perspective before blowing each other's heads off with hurtful words

Different Perspective

[his_angel]

Remember this?

"i talked about how not only do i have safe words, but Master has safe words too."

i would say .... someone could have used a safe word. Actually, it sounds like you both could have. First off, when you get these feelings creeping up on you, maybe you could use a safe word or designated word that lets Him know you would like for Him to stop and listen for a moment.

By the same token, when He feels you may be acting out He too could use a word that would help focus you on Him and the present so that you aren't caught up in how the present is reminding you of the past?

Either way, it sounds to me like a momentary lapse in communications given the emotions of the situation. And call it whatever you want to. Just something that either or both of you could use to stop the reaction of what is happening.

"i would rather just drop what happened last night and not talk about it, but that isn't good either. i just have no idea what to do at this point."my unsolicited opinion would be use it as a learning experience.