I checked out three books on communication and the philosophy of communication today for a gentleman with a moustache. I murmered, "Can I have your library card please" while he handed it to me. He asked, "What did you say?" and I shook my head because it was already done, to which he replied, "Whatever. Fuck it ( Read more... )

My friend's dad takes a few relaxing weeks every year in Thailand, to lay on the beach, to eat exotic foods, generally to wind down from the everyday stresses of the global oil business. Yet, I think we'd all agree that licking a Thai prostitute's anus is the most relaxing thing of all. My friend stumbled upon such pictures of her father engaging ( Read more... )

blank. I'll read what you write, tho.

I did not fall from space ( Read more... )

evidently im off for spring break. i assumed i had to work the week. I want to do something epic.

Job: Montessori assistant teacher. WONDERFUL.

FERAL VISIONS AGAINST CIVILIZATION ( Read more... )

Friday the kids converted Burger King paper crowns into purple stegesaurus hats and noisemakers out of paper plates and macaroni. We paraded around the school in regalia for a Dino Parade. Fun ( Read more... )

My little dino hatchlings have bitten momma in the rear. I am evidently a "bad teacher" because I did not tell a nine year old, who was standing in her chair, to sit down. She fronted me with In Living Color three-snaps-in-a-z-formation shit from across the room. I didn't take the bait. Later, she told me observation mentioned above and as ( Read more... )

I finally found a job at a NonProfit daycare in Denton. I shall guide and mold three and four year olds. The subject of the week is dinosaurs. Tomorrow is my first day. We will excavate chicken bones in the sandbox. And then make dinosaur eggs out of chicken eggs. Chickens are obviously the closest members of dinosaurs. I look forward to this job. ( Read more... )