Hidden Promise (2/2)
Important: The first part of this chapter had been done before the first chapter of this two-shot so you may encounter some weird parts. This is originally just a one-shot so that explains. (:
***
Joohyun almost cringed from the too familiar smell of coffee as soon as she entered the coffee shop near her high school. The bittersweet aroma was filling her a bit too soon, leaving her mind in a wreck for a couple of seconds. She was in love with its fragrance, it never failed to give her a sense of serenity, always perfect for her study hours.
She remembered back in the days where coffee would just remind her of endless studying hours and finishing school works but when a certain transfer student from Busan came into her classroom, coffee already reminded her of toothy smiles, boisterous laughs and lovely feeling.
No one would ever imagined that someone like her, the perfect student who was the only candidate for valedictorian in her batch, would feel something more than friendship towards a transferee student from Busan. Seo Joohyun, a beautiful, smart and kind dreamer, was so close to falling in love with Jung Yonghwa, the gorgeous, smart and silent country boy.
He was new but the nonchalance he had the first day made Joohyun rolled her eyes. ‘Another conceited student’ she remembered saying to herself. Few days after made her realized that he was aloof, that he preferred being alone during breaks and he was doing unbelievably good following their lessons. She remembered their English teacher partnered her with him for a project. Where they had to be together for most of their free time, she hesitated at first, he scared her with his mysteriousness.
“Hi” Yonghwa greeted warmly, showing his large smile at her.
She decided to linger her eyes over his face, reminiscing back to the time where she didn’t know him at all. She couldn’t remember half of it, she was drowning with the happiest times she felt when with him. He was dorky, cracking all the jokes he could think of, showing all the expressions he could make through his face, he was so alive and energetic. Something she couldn’t even imagine herself to become. He was everything she wished she was, carefree.
“Hey” she whispered, sliding over the chair in front of him.
There was an iced coffee within his reach, he said he would order one whenever he was trying to calm his nerves, it was only his second time ordering it with her. She then finally acknowledged the awkwardness of their meeting, the side glances he was throwing at her made it feel like she was really falling in love with him.
She wasn’t though. It was too close that she had to stop it as soon as she can.
“Congratulations again”
“You’ve been saying that for hundreds of times, you know” She brushed her hair out of her eyes shyly. Her heart throbbing in an unfamiliar beating, she gripped on her handkerchief tightly beneath the table.
It was wrong that they let the painful silence lingered over them. Their minds were both flying back to the times where they were too happy to think of their future. They weren’t supposed to happen, the overwhelming emotions weren’t planned because they knew their moments were numbered. They took a risk, maybe they forgot, maybe they didn’t care but it was all coming back into their senses. The hardest part of knowing each other.
She tilted her head to look over the people passing by, confusion wearying her face some more. She wasn’t in love but why was she expecting her heartbreak at the moment? She was breathing in and out, trying to ignore the pain she was getting from it. She followed the moving people outside, watching their expression, seeing her happiness with him through them.
Heaving a heavy sigh, “You know…” She was supposed to do this in an easier way, she was bright after all. But the words were hiding behind her heart, like they knew it would break her. “You aren’t supposed to happen” It almost came out as an accusation, like she didn’t want him at all. “It was carefully planned, my life is-“
“Cut it, Joohyun. This isn’t you” She could still hint the playfulness from his words despite the serious face he finally put on. Exactly like the first week she saw him.
“I’m still going to America for college” And finally, she let her hands shook slightly as the words reverberated into her brain. It was still her biggest plan, the dream, finish college in America, just like what her parents did. They were more than successful, giving her the best life she could ever wish for and she wanted to be just like them. She had consulted it with her mother, asking if she should reconsider her plan because of him.
“Follow your heart” She simply replied with an understanding smile. “And by that, I don’t mean the heart that is capable of loving. I meant the heart that is yours from the very start. What does it really want? Listen to it”
She watched Yonghwa, his expression still intact or maybe he learned to control his emotions too well. She noted the slight moving of his eyebrows, the falling of his sight down to his drink and the sip he took from it. The anticipation was killing her, she wanted something from him. She wanted him to yell at her, to say that she wasn’t supposed to do it or to smile at her at least.
“C-can you say something?” The desperation almost visible through her voice.
“I knew that already. I know how ambitious you are. I never once thought that you’ll change your plans because of me” he explained, his hands suddenly playing with the table napkin, his eyes avoiding hers. “And we’re not in love yet”
She unconsciously clenched her jaw in an attempt to stop her tears from flowing. She wouldn’t cry for him yet, they weren’t in love yet as he said, it would be useless but she still had the right to feel hurt, she assumed. She was hurting a bit too serious, she wished she could show it to him. She hoped she could tell that he was hurting her.
But that would defeat the fact that they weren’t in love, right?
So she kept it. She pretended her heart wasn’t breaking, she pretended that she was still the same girl who only wanted to dream and she was trying too hard.
He stared at her, only waiting for her weakness to come out before leaning on to her. He noticed the shaking of her lips, the hardened jaw and her misty eyes. “I’m happy for you, Joohyun. I know you will do your best”
They were just in their twenties and already experiencing a serious heartbreak, was it fair? Was it fair that they didn’t fall in love sooner?
She still had a few days left before her flight. She was fighting against her selfishness of wanting to spend more time with him so she could bottle up all their memories together, to save more preciousness with him. She stared at him, treasuring his gorgeousness for some more minutes, keeping a part of him somewhere deep in her heart.
They were drowning with each other’s presence. Cursing whatever forces that had caused their meeting, their hearts to beat in confusion of its desires and painted their lives with bright colors, they were slowing losing the realness of themselves.
She was surprised when he leaned closer to rest his hand on her cheek, out of reflex, like he had to do something before he lost it. She assured both of them that she wasn’t going to show any tears or even sadness but she let her heart bleed along with the lightness of his touch. She silently let herself hear the slow cracking of her heart, ignoring the fact that they were still reminding themselves that there wasn’t any special love between them.
They stayed together for the whole day, accompanied with silence and clasped hands, forgetting everything behind for a short while. They walked around the city, following their feet’s command with the incoherency their minds were sharing. In the end, when the sky turned darker and the familiar cold breeze was waving at them, they were already in front of her house, they were still trying to put their hearts out of each other’s reach.
Yonghwa flashed a big smile for Joohyun despite the oddness of it. Her eyes dropped over his imperfect set of teeth, smiled inwardly at the memories of laughter echoing in her mind upon seeing it.
“It might be our last meeting” He finally spoke, eyes dancing over the beauty glowing in front of him.
She shrugged, “Let’s hope not” She gritted through her teeth, disliking that they had to end their time together. “I hope you’ll succeed with college and your music” she added quickly, her mind processing too many words for him. “Uhm. I kind of prepared something for you” Her voice sounding tiny as she fished something in her bag, she turned up with a smile, offering him her favorite book. “Everything that I want to say to you is in here. The book’s message, my message, everything. I hope we won’t forget each other. Goodbye, Jung Yonghwa” She ran her eyes at his lost expression for a second before running inside their house. She ran as fast as she could, afraid of the possibility of hearing his farewell.
She never thought that saving goodbye with someone was hard. Saying goodbye to someone whom she could experience forever with, someone whom she could imagine being with when her hair was gray and already forgetting tiny bits of her memory. Someone she could give her heart to. Someone like Jung Yonghwa.
+++
Joohyun greeted the sunshine with a smile, glancing at her windowpane filled with snow, winter falling into her morning perfectly. She turned off her laptop over her head, beaming at the thought of sleeping in front of the endless school work due for next week.
“Good morning” She spoke, letting her presence known after an hour of preparing for another day. She tucked a small part of her newly-dyed brown hair behind her ears when a pair of charming eyes looked at her. The slight nervousness from anything he does will never fail to make her insides churn in a weird way.
Yonghwa had been staying in her apartment for his yearly vacation, a month with her. They started going out in her first year stay in New York. Realizing a bit late that they were in love, he called her in the middle of the night in Seoul, sunny afternoon in New York, to tell that he was crazy for her. They had to wait for the winter break to settle everything, with calmness and throbbing heart, they came upon the conclusion to try out long distance relationship. They were too caught up with their feelings that they weren’t insecure to be thousand miles away from each other.
“I made you breakfast” His voice giving exciting knots in her stomach, she smiled at the thought of their high school days when he was teasing her about her cooking skills.
“Should I be thankful?” She teased, studying the bacon and eggs at the table.
He chuckled, standing from his seat and walked over to where she was. He wrapped his arms around her waist, slightly turning her so they stood face to face. She rested her hands on his chest, eyes lovingly roaming around his face. She leaned for a short kiss on his lips, reminding herself how amazing his lips were.
“Were you that tired from last night or you just woke up late?” He whispered, his low and husky voice obviously teasing her, slow breathing brushing on her left ear.
She blushed a little before playfully shoving him away. “Maybe, maybe not. You are really something, aren’t you?” She replied with a smirk, levelling his teasing with her index finger running in a slow pace on his neck up this jaw.
“I swear I’m loving this vacation, babe”
“I can get used to this, you know”
They nodded in understanding, same thought running in their mind with the sudden confession. They wouldn’t let go of each other soon, forever had never been the best idea for them.
***
Joohyun almost cringed from the too familiar smell of coffee as soon as she entered the coffee shop near her high school. The bittersweet aroma was filling her a bit too soon, leaving her mind in a wreck for a couple of seconds. She was in love with its fragrance, it never failed to give her a sense of serenity, always perfect for her study hours.
She remembered back in the days where coffee would just remind her of endless studying hours and finishing school works but when a certain transfer student from Busan came into her classroom, coffee already reminded her of toothy smiles, boisterous laughs and lovely feeling.
No one would ever imagined that someone like her, the perfect student who was the only candidate for valedictorian in her batch, would feel something more than friendship towards a transferee student from Busan. Seo Joohyun, a beautiful, smart and kind dreamer, was so close to falling in love with Jung Yonghwa, the gorgeous, smart and silent country boy.
He was new but the nonchalance he had the first day made Joohyun rolled her eyes. ‘Another conceited student’ she remembered saying to herself. Few days after made her realized that he was aloof, that he preferred being alone during breaks and he was doing unbelievably good following their lessons. She remembered their English teacher partnered her with him for a project. Where they had to be together for most of their free time, she hesitated at first, he scared her with his mysteriousness.
“Hi” Yonghwa greeted warmly, showing his large smile at her.
She decided to linger her eyes over his face, reminiscing back to the time where she didn’t know him at all. She couldn’t remember half of it, she was drowning with the happiest times she felt when with him. He was dorky, cracking all the jokes he could think of, showing all the expressions he could make through his face, he was so alive and energetic. Something she couldn’t even imagine herself to become. He was everything she wished she was, carefree.
“Hey” she whispered, sliding over the chair in front of him.
There was an iced coffee within his reach, he said he would order one whenever he was trying to calm his nerves, it was only his second time ordering it with her. She then finally acknowledged the awkwardness of their meeting, the side glances he was throwing at her made it feel like she was really falling in love with him.
She wasn’t though. It was too close that she had to stop it as soon as she can.
“Congratulations again”
“You’ve been saying that for hundreds of times, you know” She brushed her hair out of her eyes shyly. Her heart throbbing in an unfamiliar beating, she gripped on her handkerchief tightly beneath the table.
It was wrong that they let the painful silence lingered over them. Their minds were both flying back to the times where they were too happy to think of their future. They weren’t supposed to happen, the overwhelming emotions weren’t planned because they knew their moments were numbered. They took a risk, maybe they forgot, maybe they didn’t care but it was all coming back into their senses. The hardest part of knowing each other.
She tilted her head to look over the people passing by, confusion wearying her face some more. She wasn’t in love but why was she expecting her heartbreak at the moment? She was breathing in and out, trying to ignore the pain she was getting from it. She followed the moving people outside, watching their expression, seeing her happiness with him through them.
Heaving a heavy sigh, “You know…” She was supposed to do this in an easier way, she was bright after all. But the words were hiding behind her heart, like they knew it would break her. “You aren’t supposed to happen” It almost came out as an accusation, like she didn’t want him at all. “It was carefully planned, my life is-“
“Cut it, Joohyun. This isn’t you” She could still hint the playfulness from his words despite the serious face he finally put on. Exactly like the first week she saw him.
“I’m still going to America for college” And finally, she let her hands shook slightly as the words reverberated into her brain. It was still her biggest plan, the dream, finish college in America, just like what her parents did. They were more than successful, giving her the best life she could ever wish for and she wanted to be just like them. She had consulted it with her mother, asking if she should reconsider her plan because of him.
“Follow your heart” She simply replied with an understanding smile. “And by that, I don’t mean the heart that is capable of loving. I meant the heart that is yours from the very start. What does it really want? Listen to it”
She watched Yonghwa, his expression still intact or maybe he learned to control his emotions too well. She noted the slight moving of his eyebrows, the falling of his sight down to his drink and the sip he took from it. The anticipation was killing her, she wanted something from him. She wanted him to yell at her, to say that she wasn’t supposed to do it or to smile at her at least.
“C-can you say something?” The desperation almost visible through her voice.
“I knew that already. I know how ambitious you are. I never once thought that you’ll change your plans because of me” he explained, his hands suddenly playing with the table napkin, his eyes avoiding hers. “And we’re not in love yet”
She unconsciously clenched her jaw in an attempt to stop her tears from flowing. She wouldn’t cry for him yet, they weren’t in love yet as he said, it would be useless but she still had the right to feel hurt, she assumed. She was hurting a bit too serious, she wished she could show it to him. She hoped she could tell that he was hurting her.
But that would defeat the fact that they weren’t in love, right?
So she kept it. She pretended her heart wasn’t breaking, she pretended that she was still the same girl who only wanted to dream and she was trying too hard.
He stared at her, only waiting for her weakness to come out before leaning on to her. He noticed the shaking of her lips, the hardened jaw and her misty eyes. “I’m happy for you, Joohyun. I know you will do your best”
They were just in their twenties and already experiencing a serious heartbreak, was it fair? Was it fair that they didn’t fall in love sooner?
She still had a few days left before her flight. She was fighting against her selfishness of wanting to spend more time with him so she could bottle up all their memories together, to save more preciousness with him. She stared at him, treasuring his gorgeousness for some more minutes, keeping a part of him somewhere deep in her heart.
They were drowning with each other’s presence. Cursing whatever forces that had caused their meeting, their hearts to beat in confusion of its desires and painted their lives with bright colors, they were slowing losing the realness of themselves.
She was surprised when he leaned closer to rest his hand on her cheek, out of reflex, like he had to do something before he lost it. She assured both of them that she wasn’t going to show any tears or even sadness but she let her heart bleed along with the lightness of his touch. She silently let herself hear the slow cracking of her heart, ignoring the fact that they were still reminding themselves that there wasn’t any special love between them.
They stayed together for the whole day, accompanied with silence and clasped hands, forgetting everything behind for a short while. They walked around the city, following their feet’s command with the incoherency their minds were sharing. In the end, when the sky turned darker and the familiar cold breeze was waving at them, they were already in front of her house, they were still trying to put their hearts out of each other’s reach.
Yonghwa flashed a big smile for Joohyun despite the oddness of it. Her eyes dropped over his imperfect set of teeth, smiled inwardly at the memories of laughter echoing in her mind upon seeing it.
“It might be our last meeting” He finally spoke, eyes dancing over the beauty glowing in front of him.
She shrugged, “Let’s hope not” She gritted through her teeth, disliking that they had to end their time together. “I hope you’ll succeed with college and your music” she added quickly, her mind processing too many words for him. “Uhm. I kind of prepared something for you” Her voice sounding tiny as she fished something in her bag, she turned up with a smile, offering him her favorite book. “Everything that I want to say to you is in here. The book’s message, my message, everything. I hope we won’t forget each other. Goodbye, Jung Yonghwa” She ran her eyes at his lost expression for a second before running inside their house. She ran as fast as she could, afraid of the possibility of hearing his farewell.
She never thought that saving goodbye with someone was hard. Saying goodbye to someone whom she could experience forever with, someone whom she could imagine being with when her hair was gray and already forgetting tiny bits of her memory. Someone she could give her heart to. Someone like Jung Yonghwa.
+++
Joohyun greeted the sunshine with a smile, glancing at her windowpane filled with snow, winter falling into her morning perfectly. She turned off her laptop over her head, beaming at the thought of sleeping in front of the endless school work due for next week.
“Good morning” She spoke, letting her presence known after an hour of preparing for another day. She tucked a small part of her newly-dyed brown hair behind her ears when a pair of charming eyes looked at her. The slight nervousness from anything he does will never fail to make her insides churn in a weird way.
Yonghwa had been staying in her apartment for his yearly vacation, a month with her. They started going out in her first year stay in New York. Realizing a bit late that they were in love, he called her in the middle of the night in Seoul, sunny afternoon in New York, to tell that he was crazy for her. They had to wait for the winter break to settle everything, with calmness and throbbing heart, they came upon the conclusion to try out long distance relationship. They were too caught up with their feelings that they weren’t insecure to be thousand miles away from each other.
“I made you breakfast” His voice giving exciting knots in her stomach, she smiled at the thought of their high school days when he was teasing her about her cooking skills.
“Should I be thankful?” She teased, studying the bacon and eggs at the table.
He chuckled, standing from his seat and walked over to where she was. He wrapped his arms around her waist, slightly turning her so they stood face to face. She rested her hands on his chest, eyes lovingly roaming around his face. She leaned for a short kiss on his lips, reminding herself how amazing his lips were.
“Were you that tired from last night or you just woke up late?” He whispered, his low and husky voice obviously teasing her, slow breathing brushing on her left ear.
She blushed a little before playfully shoving him away. “Maybe, maybe not. You are really something, aren’t you?” She replied with a smirk, levelling his teasing with her index finger running in a slow pace on his neck up this jaw.
“I swear I’m loving this vacation, babe”
“I can get used to this, you know”
They nodded in understanding, same thought running in their mind with the sudden confession. They wouldn’t let go of each other soon, forever had never been the best idea for them.