When Q Becomes Your Last Chance... Part 1/3
Title: When Q Becomes Your Last Chance... Part 1/3
Author: whiteraven1606
Artist: chosenfire28
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairings: Spock/Kirk/McCoy
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Non-graphic mentions of past underage non-con/rape
Word Count: 23500
Summary: Jim Kirk gets himself de-aged and his crew can't figure out a way to fix it until Spock Prime makes a suggestion that leads to drastic actions.
Disclaimer: This is for fun. Please treat it as such.
Author's Notes: Thank you to nightshadow_t2 for the beta work, suggestions, and listening to my whining when the story just wouldn't stop. Thank you to the moderators at au_bigbang for their patience. Thanks to chosenfire28 for the wonderful poster. :) I love it. Please note that any remaining mistakes are solely of my own making, usually because of my dyslexia.
Link to the Art
Post at AO3
"We're as good as screwed."
Happy that none of the natives could hear them at that moment, Kirk rolled his eyes as Bones backed away from the panel separating them from the the scientist that Minister Lollis had politely shoved forward moments ago. "Now, Bones, you know that the honor is given to only one of us."
Bones narrowed his eyes and moved further away. Kirk had to bite the inside of his cheek not to smile as Bones edged behind Spock. Turning back to the panel, Kirk pressed the intercom button and spoke to the Minister about the possible problems that taking the gross smelling liquid could cause a human. He'd already decided that Spock with his dual physiology shouldn't touch the stuff. He'd almost rather Bones take it since it was less likely that Bones would be allergic than him, but that wasn't happening either. Kirk nodded as the Minister reassured him that it had been used numerous times before to show the truth of a prospective trading partner.
Before either of his officers could argue with him about it, or take the drug themselves, Kirk downed it in one gulp and carefully sat the glass back down. Behind him Bones started cussing and Spock was suddenly right beside him, hovering.
"I'm good." Kirk blinked. Well, no, maybe he wasn't. Grabbing Spock's arm for balance, Kirk leaned to one side as his head started spinning.
****
As Jim fell, Bones was already moving to catch him. "Idiot." Easing him to the floor, Bones glanced up at Spock as he calmly spoke to the Minister about what the hell had just happened. Not that Spock would word it that way. Bones scanned Kirk and raised his eyebrows at the readout. "Spock."
Spock turned towards him. "Yes, Doctor?"
Bones pried one of Jim's eyes open and frowned at the look of the pupil. "He isn't allergic, but I don't like the look of his vitals."
Nodding, Spock turned back to the Minister and they argued over letting Kirk go back to the ship. Bones looked up as the panel parted and the scientist came forward timidly. When Bones looked back at Jim he froze for a moment. Turning Jim's arm carefully, Bones watched as his skin rippled. "Fuck."
Spock was next to him in an instant and they watched helplessly as Jim's body started changing. Bones spared a glance at the Minister and his pet scientist and worried more as they seemed genuinely surprised at what Jim's body was doing. Trying to decide if anything he had with him could help, Bones checked his tricorder again. As he looked back to Jim, he noticed that the Minister was smiling.
Shooting up, Bones got right into the Minister's face. "Why the hell are you smiling?"
"You are most blessed. Rarely does the Showing give such bounty."
Shoving down the urge to punch the man's very inviting nose, Bones turned back to find Spock cradling a small Jim in normal Jim-sized clothing. Trying to control his breathing, Bones dropped heavily to his knees and checked this tiny version of Jim over as thoroughly as he could. Looking up at the beaming crazy standing beside his smiling scientist that Bones wanted to smack, he narrowed his eyes at them. "How does this prove anything to you?"
The creepy smile widened and Bones was restrained by Spock's hand on his arm as the Minister started spouting how their method was the most productive manner for choosing trading partners. Torn between shaking off Spock to break the Minister's face and trying to make sure Jim was okay, Bones was developing a splitting headache. Spock stood up slowly and in no uncertain terms and in very polite language that made Bones' temples throb, insisted they return to the ship with Jim.
Bones wasn't surprised when the Minister had backed up a step and quickly agreed to allow them to return later to continue their negotiations. As they rematerialized in the transporter room, Bones picked up Jim's little body, trying to keep his clothes mostly in place. "This had better be as important as Starfleet insists it is."
Spock's eyebrows flattened and he helped arrange Jim on the gurney that had quietly appeared. "This star system has several rare elements and minerals that would be of great value to the Federation."
"Yeah, and what's Jim? Worthless pawn?"
Spock tucked Jim's little hand under the blanket Chapel had spread over the unconscious body. "Pawns are often the most important player." Spock stepped back. "Even more so when the Captain is playing."
****
It didn't take long to figure out that something was horribly wrong with Jim beyond him being a child. Bones reran the latest scan, vainly hoping it would give a different result. "When you're an adult again Jim, I'm going to kill you." Stabbing at the controls, Bones ordered several more scans. Then he went into his office and started putting in the passwords to unlock the parts of Jim's file that covered Jim's childhood that he'd never had reason to pry into. When he hit a pass-lock that required two officers to override, Bones commed Spock and fumed as he waited for Spock to come down from the bridge.
Without any preamble, Bones shoved his PADD at Spock. "Override this."
Spock looked over the file and sat the PADD down on his desk. "I will not."
Bones could have screamed, but instead he cussed and slammed his coffee cup down hard enough to crack the handle. "Dammit, Spock. I need to know why Jim looks like he's about to starve to death. It's locked in that file. I just need another officer of sufficient rank to override it."
It looked like Spock grew another centimeter as he stiffened. "The Captain requested I never be party to that portion of his file."
Rubbing his hand through his hair, Bones considered the problem. If Jim knew that Spock shouldn't see something in his file either it was something Jim would be ashamed of Spock seeing or something that would emotionally compromise Spock. It was an older file than the loss of Vulcan and Jim didn't really have a setting for shameful. Bones grabbed up the PADD and rechecked the date on the file. "Oh, no. No, no, no. Dammit. Of all the stupid things not to tell me."
Bones threw the PADD back down on his desk and stomped out to readjust the settings for Jim's biobed now that he knew what was actually wrong. Spock silently followed and stood beside Jim's bed as Bones worked. Once he was satisfied, Bones pushed himself up onto the next biobed over, next to where Spock was standing.
"You ever look at the date on the files he didn't want you to see?"
Spock crossed his arms. "Yes." He lifted his chin that tiny amount which usually made Bones mad, but right now just made him more tired. "He appears to require that we know nothing of his childhood that is not something he himself has told us."
"Tarsus IV, Spock."
"Indeed."
Bones sighed. "Yeah, I'd cuss too." He knew Spock was preoccupied with worrying when he didn't argue that he'd not used foul language. "You have any idea what happened to him? Really?" Spock shifted his weight and Bones turned to stare at him. That wasn't normal for Spock, which just made Bones' day that much better. God, he needed a drink.
"The Captain has said nothing of value."
Bones rolled his eyes. "I knew that, you pointy eared hobgoblin."
Spock did that thing with his eyebrows that made Bones wanted to figure out how to copy it, if only to annoy Jim with it someday. As Spock started to speak the biobed's alarm sounded and Bones was suddenly busy with Jim who had shot upright and was breathing hard.
****
The man made that soothing gesture adults all used when they wanted something. Jim pressed back into the wall and pulled the covers up higher. The other adult was different from anyone Jim had seen on the colony. The pointed ears and green skin tone marked the guy as Vulcan. Jim jerked away as the human adult moved closer.
"Dammit, Jim. Calm down."
The Vulcan's eyes changed and Jim stared at the sight. He'd always heard that Vulcan were emotionless, but this Vulcan's eyes were warm. Like his mother's when she wasn't trying to be brave or was just distracted. "You should refrain from using inappropriate language, Doctor."
Jim squirmed away as the Doctor tried to get a hand on him even as he glared at the Vulcan. "I'm sure even at this age he's heard it before, Spock."
They both looked down at him and Jim sat very still. They didn't look like all the adults he was used to seeing. Neither of them looked hungry. His stomach growled at the thought of being full.
"Perhaps Jim would benefit from a tour of the ship."
Jim blinked. Ship? He wasn't on the colony? He looked around, but everything looked like that infirmary he'd been in before. Of course, he'd been in bad shape so his memory of it was pretty fuzzy. He looked back at the adults who were gazing at him. Tucking the blanket tighter under his chin, Jim shrugged.
The Doctor hmphed. "Fine. We'll stop at the mess and see if Jim's up to eating anything." Jim was up and off the biobed so fast he lost the blanket. He pressed back against the wall next to the Vulcan, Spock. He watched the adults bicker about who was going to be responsible for him. It wasn't the way things worked. Nothing he'd seen so far was right. Maybe he was in a dream.
That certainly made better sense than anything else he could think of, because he didn't want these adults to be like the ones he was used to. He liked the look of them. The calm they both had about them that said they hadn't seen what he'd seen. Didn't know what he'd had to do to survive. Jim blinked as he suddenly yawned. The Doctor was in front of him and Jim hadn't seen him move.
"How about you lay back down for a while."
Jim shook his head and moved along the wall away from the Doctor. He cringed as the adults moved to block him in. Breathing harder, Jim tried to figure out how to escape. He needed a place to hide and rest. Away from the Doctor. He seemed nice, but all adults seemed that way until they weren't. The Vulcan cocked his head and Jim watched him as he pulled the Doctor away and they started arguing. Jim slipped down the wall until he got to a door and when it whooshed open he went through it. Moving quickly, Jim started looking for a good place to rest. The ship was beautiful. Everything was so clean. Jim found a lift and pressed up against the wall as an adult followed him in.
"Captain, did Dr. McCoy let you go already?"
Jim stared at the pretty lady as she smiled at him. Why was she calling him a rank? He was just a kid...Jim looked down at himself. He was clean. Dealing with adults that seemed to know him that he'd never met. With no one else around that was from the colony. Time travel. That had to be it. Jim nodded.
"Alright. Would you like me to escort you to your quarters, sir?"
He had quarters? Defiantly time travel. Jim nodded again and the woman smiled down at him. He hung back a little so she'd pick the direction without expecting him to know where they were going as they exited the lift. When they reached a door on a level Jim hadn't seen before, the woman left him with a quick wave. Jim looked the door up and down. It hadn't just opened like the other doors. Jim turned and headed to the next door down. The little name plate read Commander Spock. That was a Vulcan name. Jim touched the door. Maybe it was the Vulcan from the infirmary. There couldn't be too many of them serving in his lifetime. He remembered his Mom talking about it to someone once. As he turned to go back to his door and hack his way in there was noise from down the corridor.
Not wanting to deal with another adult, Jim tapped the first code that came to mind and jumped slightly when the door just opened right up. Hurrying in, Jim panted in the warmer air of the room as the door closed behind him. Moving slowly around, Jim looked over everything. It was quiet and very clean. Jim climbed up onto the bed and laid down. He'd go to his room in a few minutes. He was just so tired.
****
Spock watched over McCoy's shoulder as Jim slipped out the door. "You must consider what the Captain might have survived when dealing with this version of Jim."
With a sputter, McCoy turned away only to freeze for a moment and then turn back. "You let him escape!"
"Yes." Jim had displayed elevated levels of stress each time either of them moved as well as when McCoy spoke. "He was not speaking. In the time you have known Jim when does he not speak when spoken to?"
McCoy blinked and stood with his mouth hanging open slightly. Then he turned and stomped into his office. Spock straightened his tunic and went to locate his de-aged Captain before he could compromise any of the computer's systems.
****
Spock stared down at the sleeping child in shock. He had not expected to find the Captain in his bed. The boy was curled up on top of the covers. He'd tucked himself into a protective posture that fueled Spock's speculation as to Jim's history. He carefully shook Jim's foot to wake him. Jim jerked awake and kicked him all at the same time. Spock didn't dodge the blow and held still as Jim scrambled away into the corner.
"Please refrain from injuring yourself as I would be required to escort you to the infirmary."
Jim rubbed his face and then shook his head.
Spock cocked his head and raised an eyebrow. "Do you speak?"
Blinking, Jim shrugged. Then he shook his head slightly.
"Very well." Spock held out a PADD. "Perhaps you would feel comfortable with writing instead."
Slowly, Jim edged forward and then snatched the PADD away before backing up until his back was against the wall.
"If you require you may sleep in my quarters."
Shaking his head, Jim back further away until he encountered a chair.
Spock sat on the edge of his bed. "I require nothing of you, Jim. You have quarters of your own. I will show you." Spock lead the way into the bathroom and keyed the panel to open the door into Jim's quarters. Made to look like a wall panel so that the Captain's quarters could be given to visiting dignitaries if necessary, the door to Spock's bathroom was usually used for quick meetings between himself and the Captain. Spock keyed the panel to unlocked mode and stepped through the doorway into his Captain's quarters. "These are your quarters."
Jim edged into the room and stared. There were little things that spoke to him. There was a chess set in the middle of a game on the desk. Jim moved forward and studied the board.
"We were interrupted and unable to finish the game you see in progress."
Looking up sharply, Jim furrowed his brow.
"We have engaged in play as often as our duties allow."
Jim tapped on the PADD and held it out towards Spock, tilting it for Spock to read.
"Yes, we are friends. You have claimed such a relationship several times in the past." Spock settled into the chair at Jim's desk and began programing the small replicator to Jim's new size. "As you are friends with Dr. McCoy. You insist on calling him 'Bones'. You have never explained why." Spock watched as Jim trailed his fingers across edges of items. He was unsurprised when a panel popped out that he had not known would open. Jim glanced at him and then pulled the panel further open. Spock stayed where he was and waited. When Jim brought out several small pouches Spock knew to be field rations, Spock kept silent as Jim tore into one and put the others back.
Partway through the pouch, Jim froze and looked up at him. Spock lifted an eyebrow. "If you are still hungry after finishing more food may be brought from the mess."
Jim frowned and his eyes darted from Spock to the door and back. Then he brought the food with him and moved closer to Spock. When he held the pouch out to Spock it made something in Spock's chest hurt until he drew a deep breath.
"I have eaten." Spock stood and Jim scrambled towards the bed with the pouch of food grasped tightly in one hand. Spock moved towards the connecting door to his bathroom. "I will endeavour to bring you more to eat, Jim. Please make yourself comfortable. The replicator has been given your new measurements so that you may make yourself clothing that fits."
He paused at the door to his quarters before exiting into the hallway and stood concentrating on his breathing for several minutes before proceeding.
****
Jim watched the Vulcan leave and as soon as the door closed he wolfed down the rest of the food in the pouch. Then he listened at the door and made sure Spock wasn't on the other side. Moving quickly he reopened the panel in the wall and pulled out all the food pouches. Sorting them by date he shoved several into a bend in the desk that few people noticed and the rest into a tiny space between the bunk and the wall. He searched the rest of the room and found several more spots with hidden food. All stable environment pouches so there was no worry of spoilage.
Jim checked the tiny replicator and grinned. His measurements were exact. Vulcans were cool with that ability to measure just by looking. Tapping the controls, Jim ordered up pants and a shirt for himself. Moving to the chess game Jim cocked his head and tried to decide if Spock was the black or white player. Then he looked around the room. They'd be wanting the adult him back. He'd have to return to his own time. He didn't want that. Jim pulled the finished clothing on and folded the scrubs from the infirmary carefully.
Maybe he could convince them to let him stay. Jim settled into the most defensible corner of the room as he thought it through. They had to send him back so he could grow up to be here as an adult. He'd just have to survive it. He'd grow up to have this if he did. It was something to hold onto when he went back. Jim tucked his head against his knees and dozed.
****
McCoy was still pissed, but he was too busy trying to break into Jim's file to indulge in a good temper tantrum that he felt he was entitled to have. When Spock strode into the room, Bones was ready to yell at him until he got a look at the set of Spock's eyebrows. Freezing, Bones stared.
"Please give me the PADD, Doctor."
Bones didn't hesitate. He watched as Spock entered his code and then he held the PADD back out. Taking it, Bones punched in his own code and waited for the file to open. "I thought you'd promised Jim."
Spock clasped his hands behind his back. "I will not read the file."
Bones glanced up as the file continued to load. "What happened?"
"Jim has hidden food within his quarters."
Blinking, Bones started reading through the file. "That was fast."
"Not the boy, the Captain."
Startled, Bones dropped the PADD. "What?"
Spock looked to Bones like he was about to explode. "He has modified the wall panels and has hidden field rations."
That was...logical, actually, given Jim's history. Bones shook his head at that horrible thought. "I'll corner Jim about it when he's an adult again. He isn't him in a little body, then? He's regressed to the boy he was."
Spock nodded. Bones refocused on the file and abruptly closed it. "Oh, God." He drew deep breaths, trying not to be sick. "Okay, okay." Spock titled his head and Bones tried to clam down before Spock broke his promise and read the file. "Keep your word to Jim. Don't read that. Ever." Bones pulled out one of his better bottles of liquor and poured himself a drink. He knew now why Jim had been acting like he was afraid of him. "Spock, you're probably the only person Jim is going to trust. I'm asking you as his friend to be very careful with him."
"I will endeavor do so." Spock poured him another glass when Bones' hands shook too hard to do it himself. "I must return to Jim. I have stated that I would bring him food."
Bones nodded. "Okay, go. I'll be fine, Spock." Bones ignored the eyebrow he got in repose and reopened the file and continued on. He was definitely going to kill Jim. Just as soon as he was adult again.
****
Spock entered Jim's quarters and narrowed his eyes at the boy huddling in the corner. He seemed asleep. Spock set the food down on the desk and checked the log for the replicator. He ordered several more sets of clothing in the style Jim had chosen. Carefully approaching Jim, Spock spoke his name in an attempt to wake the boy without getting kicked. Jim jerked his head up and then rubbed his eyes. Spock held out his hand. "I have brought food for you."
Jim scrambled up and eyed Spock's hand before leaning to the left to look past him. Spock stepped to the side and allowed Jim to slip past him towards the desk. As Spock watched Jim eat, he sat down making sure to keep in Jim's sight. "We will be required to return to the planet in the morning."
Jim paused with a bite of food partway to his mouth. He looked at Spock and then went back to eating.
"The Minister has made assurances that you will be returned to the proper age when we return to the planet."
Jim pulled the PADD to him and typed for a moment before holding it out to Spock.
"No, Jim. It is not time travel. You were an adult yesterday until you drank a substance to prevent myself or Doctor McCoy from doing so." Spock pushed the PADD back towards Jim. "You are very protective of the Doctor."
Blinking, Jim fingered the edge of the PADD. He looked down at the crumbs on his plate and then back up at Spock.
"I will retire. Please remain within your quarters. If you have need of anything you may contact Doctor McCoy or myself." Spock retreated to his own quarters quickly. He knelt to meditate. The stress and worry radiating from Jim had taken a toll on him. Spock carefully controlled his breathing as he calmed his mind.
****
When he rose from his mediation, Spock stilled as he caught sight of Jim curled under the covers of his bed. Cocking his head, Spock watched the boy sleep. After several moments, Spock moved, silently crossing his room, through the bathroom, into Jim's quarters. Moving left from the doorway, Spock began searching the room. After finding the third moving panel where there shouldn't be one, Spock froze as across the room several panels popped open all at once. Spock reflexively glanced at the ceiling.
The door chimed and then popped open to allow McCoy to enter.
"What the..." McCoy eyed the room and turned to Spock. "Where's Jim?"
"He is sleeping."
McCoy turned his head to look at the bed and then back towards Spock. "Not in here, obviously. What's all this?" He gestured at the open panels. "Curious about how much he's managed to hide?"
Spock pressed his lips together and straightened up.
"Oh, don't go all fucking Vulcan on me. I'm worried too."
Spock took several carefully controlled breaths. "He is accomplished at hoarding."
McCoy flicked through the pouches in one of the hidey holes. "Yeah, looks like it. He's a goddamn genius. Stupid kid."
"That is an illogical statement, Doctor."
With a grin, McCoy dropped to sit on the edge of Jim's bed. "Feel better now?"
Spock ignored that and sat down. "He had formed the theory of time travel to explain the situation to himself."
"That's not too bad. You know, Jim invited an older Vulcan Ambassador to visit next week."
He hadn't known that. There was only one Vulcan Spock knew Jim would extend an invitation to, and that was his older self. "He should be recovered before his visitor arrives."
"Yeah, well, just in case he isn't I wanted you to know. Jim was going to make it a surprise for you, so you don't know, alright?"
"I shall endeavor to keep quiet on the matter, although I do not understand the need to surprise me."
McCoy smiled and rubbed his hand through his hair. "Please, I'm not falling for that bullshit. You know why Jim wants to surprise you."
Spock actually wasn't certain, but he would not say so to McCoy. Instead he gestured to the open panels. "Do you know of any command that the Captain could use to make all the panels open at once?"
Blinking, McCoy looked around at the various panels. "Well, no. I suppose...You ever have the ship do something for you?" Rubbing the knuckles of one hand, McCoy looked at Spock. "I'd swear the ship sometimes does things that it shouldn't be able to do. I've heard patients say things sometimes about what the ship did to help them."
Spock touched a bishop with his finger as he considered that. "I require more data before forming a theory." He did not mention the various times he had observed the ship giving the Captain what he wanted even when it was not proper. Codes were the best example. "Is there a reason for your visit, Doctor?"
McCoy rolled his eyes and Spock cocked an eyebrow at him. "I just wanted to check on Jim."
Spock understood and lead the way through his bathroom into his quarters. Jim was still curled under the covers of his bed. The posture was defensive and he was unnaturally quiet. He watched as McCoy ran a tricorder over Jim.
"You have any idea why he likes your bed?" McCoy held out the tricorder towards him.
Spock took the tricorder and looked over the readings. "I do not. He appears to be healthy given the circumstances."
McCoy muttered to himself as he took the tricorder back. Spock ignored the comments as they were insulting and nothing he had not heard before. Spock lead the way back into the Captain's quarters and watched as McCoy sat down and fidgeted with his tricorder. Clasping his hands behind his back, Spock tried to decide what would be appropriate to say or if silence would be more acceptable to McCoy.
McCoy sighed. "He's in better shape than I'd have expected, actually." McCoy stood abruptly and started closing panels. "I know we tend to bicker a lot, but I think we need to call a truce until Jim's normal again."
Spock moved to help with the panels. "I agree that stressing the Captain is unproductive at this time."
"He wouldn't mind you using his bed, you know." McCoy gathered up his tricorder and moved towards the door. "Just be...careful. He's not Jim as you know him, okay?"
"Goodnight, Doctor." Spock waited until the door closed behind the Doctor before picking up the PADD left behind by Jim and moving through the bathroom into his own quarters. Jim was curled up and remained unnaturally still. "You are safe here, Jim."
There was a muffled noise from the bed and then Jim's head appeared above the covers. He blinked as Spock sat the PADD down near the bed.
"Please sleep, Jim. I will watch over you."
Jim yawned and patted the bed. Spock hesitated for a moment and then sat down where indicated. Jim reached out and then stopped, his fingers hovering over Spock's hand. Jim looked up at him and then stroked the back of Spock's hand with his fingertips. Spock was hit with the worry and near panic of Jim's feelings. He forced himself to relax his stiff posture and Jim curled into his side.
Spock tried to keep breathing as Jim emotions swept over him. He picked up an edge of a buried want and Spock ghosted his fingers over Jim's hair. The want bloomed and the panic ebbed away. Slowly, Jim drifted to sleep as Spock carefully rubbed his fingers over Jim's hair and down to the fabric covering Jim's small back. Leaning back, Spock allowed himself to slip into sleep with his hand resting on Jim's head.
****
Jim woke warm and strangely non-hungry. There was a hand on his head. Shifting slightly, Jim creaked an eye open and found himself looking at a pointed ear. Oh, right, the Vulcan, Spock. He'd not wanted anything, which Jim wasn't sure what to think about that. He wondered if Spock would try to make him do anything, or if he would remain the nice adult he was being now. Spock's fingers started rubbing on his neck. Jim felt heavy. He blinked slowly and yawned widely as his body relaxed. He liked Spock. He really hoped he'd continue to be a nice person. Jim slipped back into sleep.
****
Spock edged himself away from Jim and moved to sit at his desk. He had not promised the Captain he would not read the file he'd helped McCoy unlock. He'd only implied he would not. He paused with his fingers poised over the controls that would open the file. He looked at Jim sleeping fitfully and thought about the emotions he'd picked up from Jim while the boy had been awake and also while asleep.
Turning back, Spock opened the file. He read quickly and stopped as abruptly as he'd seen McCoy do. Closing his eyes, Spock forced control on his own emotions. He started reading again. Purposefully pushing himself to read as quickly as possible. As Spock came to video files he checked on Jim and turned the volume off before opening the first video. The PADD automatically put in subtitles when the volume was muted, but Spock didn't need them to know what was happening. The quality of the video was poor, but the boy in it was Jim.
Several minutes into it, Spock broke the PADD when he clenched his hands. Bowing his head, Spock tried to force down the rage he felt.
"I deserved it." Jerking his head up, Spock came face to face with Jim. He was standing, holding one elbow with his other hand. His feet bare on the carpet.
"Why do you believe that?"
Jim pressed his lips together and shook his head.
"You were not at fault." Spock pried his fingers from the sheds of the PADD. He stilled as Jim stepped forward and gently turned over one hand. "You were very brave and managed admirably in the circumstances given to you."
Jim looked up through his mussed hair as he checked over Spock's bleeding hand. "I wanted to live."
Spock dripped blood on the console and touched the emergency button to signal McCoy. "You did very well, Jim. I am proud of you."
Blinking, Jim grinned. Then he frowned and gestured at the remains of the PADD as he raised his eyebrows.
"I felt the need to understand. Your older self had requested I never access the information."
Jim nodded and patted Spock's forearm. Then he smiled sadly. "I like you."
There were foot steps outside Spock's door and he was not surprised when Jim retreated into his bathroom. He ignored most of the cursing and comments from McCoy as the Doctor treated the injuries he had inflicted on himself.
"What the hell were you thinking?"
Spock finished inspecting McCoy's work. "I do not know what you are referring to, Doctor."
"Don't 'Doctor' me, you overgrown green-blooded elf. He asked you never to access that file because he knew how much it would upset you."
"I am not upset."
McCoy rolled his eyes. "Whatever." He sagged, his shoulders slumping. "Spock, look...Jim is all bluster and ego right up until it is something that hurts. Then he clams up tighter than an airlock. If the kid will talk to you, let him. Please."
Spock looked towards his bed. "I understand, Leonard." He allowed McCoy to lead him to his bed. When McCoy pressed a hypo to his skin, Spock did not protest. "I do not understand why some humans act in the matter they do towards children." He couldn't control his descent into sleep as McCoy's drugs took him away.
Above him McCoy checked his tricorder. "No one does, Spock. No one at all."
****
Jim waited until the Doctor poked his head into the room and left again before getting up and taking several pouches of food and his PADD with him back into Spock's room. Hiding one of the pouches under Spock's desk, he climbed up beside Spock on the bed. He tucked the remaining pouches into the crack between the bed and the wall. Then he pulled up the file Spock had been looking at and, after a little hacking, opened it to where Spock had been. Muting the volume, Jim watched the vid play out on the tiny screen. He remembered that. They'd held him down and played with him because they'd found him out after curfew trying to gather plants that might prove edible. He wondered if they were still alive. He watched himself as though it was some other boy. Some other person being hurt and no one coming to the rescue.
Looking down at Spock, Jim thought that if he'd been there he'd have interfered. Checking Spock's hands, Jim decided the Doctor probably wasn't too bad. Going back to the PADD he advanced to a vid with a date he didn't remember. Curious, Jim opened the file and gasped. He dropped the PADD to the covers and groped for Spock's lax hand. He stared at himself. He looked horrible. Starved and desperate. The taunts from the men in the background washed over him as he read them and on screen he panted heavily.
He remembered why they'd recorded him. The leader had said he made such pretty memories. Just as he was about to shut down the vid with shaking fingers, the scene changed. He was pulled out of frame by someone. Then there was screaming, indistinct according to the subtitles. Jim stabbed the button to shut down the PADD. He wrapped his small fingers around Spock's long fingers and tried not to be sick. He was tired and the only thing that made it better was he wouldn't have to go back since it wasn't time travel.
He felt the PADD slid off his lap as he went to sleep, but Jim was too tired to care.
****
Bones slipped into Spock's quarters without sounding his arrival. He stood just inside the door and watched Jim and Spock sleep. Jim had draped himself across Spock's stomach, his ear against the spot where Spock's heart was. Moving forward, Bones sat down the food he'd brought and then checked them both over with his tricorder. Pleased with the readings for Spock's hands, Bones frowned at Jim's readings. He hoped that the adult version of Jim wouldn't be too mad when he learned Spock hurt himself from watching the file. He still couldn't understand why they'd kept those vids in there. He could understand needing them for trials, but after that...It just didn't make sense. As he started to back away, Jim's eyes popped open.
"Hey." He tried to be quiet and he pointed at Spock. "He's still sleeping. You okay?"
Jim yawned. Then he blinked at Bones before nodding.
"Good, good. I brought food, if you want some."
Jim frowned and pressed himself into Spock.
"No, I'm not asking you for..." Bones swallowed. "I'm not them, Jim. We're best friends and I wouldn't hurt you unless I had to."
Pressing his lips together, Jim edged towards him. Bones caught the PADD as it fell over the edge of the bed. Moving away, Bones sat the PADD on the desk and brought back the juice.
"At least drink something. You worry me, Jim."
Taking the juice, Jim watched him and Spock as he drank. Handing the empty cup to him, Jim yawned again and then frowned.
"You being tired isn't a bad thing, kid."
Jim looked up sharply at that. Blinking, he petted Spock's hand and watched Bones as he did.
Bones snorted. "He needs to sleep too, no matter what he says. I just helped a little."
With a nod, Jim laid back down and watched Bones with sleepy eyes.
****
Bones was happy that Jim seemed willing to go anywhere as long as he could be within a meter of Spock. It made it much easier to convince the boy to go with them to the planet. Watching him stare around the transporter room as they waited on Spock to come from the bridge made Bones wonder if this version of Jim had ever dealt with a transporter before. The boy stared at the console settings as Spock came in. Bones smiled as Jim pointed out something to Spock with excited facial expressions. Spock explained the transporter's abilities as Bones rechecked his bag one last time.
As they waited for the Minister to look over Jim, Bones rechecked his medical bag mostly to calm his nerves. He had everything he needed to stop or reverse any of Jim's allergic reactions. He'd been surprised by some of the things Jim was currently allergic to that he wasn't allergic to as an adult.
The Minister looked over Jim with obvious delight. It was all Bones could do not to punch him. As he watched Spock and the Minister hash out the mining rights while Jim more or less hid behind Spock. It was sadly amusing. Bones nearly jumped out of his skin when Jim darted away from the Minister's outstretched hand to his side. Gingerly setting his hand on Jim's shoulder, Bones smiled down on him.
"He won't touch you, Jim."
Jim edged closer to him as Bones turned his attention to the Minister's pet scientist as he approached with a glass of foul smelling liquid. The Minister came closer with Spock right beside him.
"Your Captain is a treasure, Doctor McCoy."
Bones glared at him. "You don't know the half of it." He motioned to the scientist. "That is safe to give him, right?"
The Minister beamed in that manic way that worried Bones all the more. "Of course. We would not endanger such wonderful trading partners as yourselves."
Bones suppressed the snort he wanted to make at that. He opened his tricorder as Spock handed Jim the glass and explained why he had to drink it. Jim looked up at Spock and smiled that beautiful smile of his that made Bones melt a little inside.
"Thanks for being nice."
Bones bit his lip at Jim's quiet statement. Jim eyed the glass of liquid and downed it in one gulp. Bones grasped his arm as Jim swayed. His tricorder started screaming and Bones started pulling the proper preloaded hypo from his bag before Jim even hit the floor.
Spock pushed back the Minister and knelt beside Bones and Jim. Bones didn't have to reach for anything as Spock was handing him what he needed before he could even open his mouth to ask. Yelling at Jim to stay here damnit, Bones stabbed him with several hypos and waited for the readings to change. Cursing when Jim's breathing started to become labored, Bones pressed in another hypo and hissed at Spock to get them back to the ship. As Spock spoke into his communicator, Bones stood up and advanced on the Minister.
"You had better hope he survives, you stupid asshole." Bones punched the sniveling Minister right in the nose, proud to hear the crunching of cartilage and bone. Turning back to Jim he ignored the shouts and yowling behind him as the transporter took them away.
****
Spock finally gave Uhura permission to accept the Minister's humble apologies for nearly killing the Captain several hours after Jim had stabilized. He felt too much unchecked rage to trust himself to see to it. Instead he hovered beside Jim's tiny form laid quietly on the biobed nearest McCoy's office. He could hear McCoy complaining to Chapel about the treatment of his knuckles' abrasions through the closed office door.
The formulas that the Minister's scientists had gladly given up were unhelpful in attempting to figure out how to return the Captain to his proper size and age. The assurances that this had never happened before did nothing to sooth Spock. There was nothing about the nannites used that made logical sense to Spock. Tapping on his PADD, Spock tried another model to see if that would help. When it ended with Jim's death, Spock shut down the PADD and sat watching Jim breath.
It took several minutes for McCoy to appear. He was fidgeting with his nearly healed hand as he approached. "He'll wake up soon, Spock."
Looking up at McCoy, Spock rose his eyebrow. "Indeed. Is your hand well, Doctor?"
McCoy flexed his hand and grinned. "Never felt better." He shifted his weight from one foot to the another. "Spock...I don't know any way of fixing Jim if their method won't work."
Spock reactivated his PADD. "I have not found any method that does not result in the Captain's death."
Blowing a hard breath out, McCoy dropped to sit on the edge of the biobed. "Shit." He rubbed his hand through his hair. "Well, we'll just have to tell StarFleet how well their important trading deal went."
"I have informed them of the beneficial outcome of the trade negotiations."
McCoy nodded. "And you told them about the Captain suddenly being a child."
"No." Spock sat the PADD down. "I have said nothing about Jim's current condition. He is listed as on medical leave for a nearly fatal allergic reaction."
Blinking, McCoy rubbed his forehead. "Nice to know who I have on medical leave." Then he sighed and looked down at Jim. "Okay. Any idea how long we can avoid telling StarFleet?"
Spock straightened a bit more than normal. "As long as is required."
McCoy grinned. "You're a good person, Spock." He stood and clapped Spock on the shoulder than then waved at Jim. "You can take him back to his quarters once he wakes up and I've looked him over."
****
Jim woke up and groaned. Blinking his eyes open he started at the sight of Spock far too close. Shooting up, Jim swayed as his head spun. Spock held out a glass of water. Jim gratefully drank, getting the horrible aftertaste out of his mouth.
"You had an adverse reaction to the re-aging agent."
Jim nodded and handed back the glass. He remembered not being able to breathe and the Doctor over him yelling something. He vaguely remembered seeing the nice nurse, Chapel.
Spock took the glass and put it down on the desk. As he came back he held a PADD. "Before you were reverted to your current age you invited a Vulcan dignitary to visit."
Cocking his head, Jim crinkled his brow.
"You will understand once you've read this." Spock handed him the PADD he'd been holding.
Jim watched him back up and sit down heavily. Glancing down at the PADD and then back up to Spock, Jim wondered what he could have done to weigh so heavily on the Vulcan. He focused on the PADD and read through the report on screen. Oh. Jim sat the PADD down carefully. Standing, Jim went to Spock and patted his knee. "I'm sorry."
Spock settled his hand on Jim's shoulder. "You saved Earth. You attempted to save Vulcan. You have nothing to be sorry for, Jim."
Jim darted back across the room, grabbed up the PADD, and brought it back with him. "He's you." He pointed at the line in the report. "Same name."
Spock took the PADD and sat it down beside the bed. "He came back through time in an attempt to stop what happened. He told you that we would become friends."
Jim smiled and nodded as he moved to lay back down. Then he frowned and looked at Spock.
"He will understand your current circumstances, Jim. I will endeavour to return you to your normal state before his arrival." Spock pulled the covers over Jim's small frame. "McCoy has informed me that you were going to surprise me with the visit of my elder self."
Jim patted Spock's forearm and grinned a little. Spock smoothed the wrinkles out of the blanket. Jim yawned as that heavy feeling came back. He liked this life. He didn't want it to end, even if it turned out to be a dream.
****
Spock had not expected to have Jim so happy to met an adult. As they moved through Engineering, Jim drifted more than a meter away from him as Scotty described everything the engines could do. Jim stared around them with wide eyes. As Jim followed Keenser into an alcove to look at a part of the antimatter reaction chamber's cooling system, Scotty stepped closer to Spock.
"Sir, I donna know what the Captain's life was like as a boy, but he's a bit thin." Scotty jerked a thumb towards where Jim was busy pouring over the equations that made the engine possible. "He's a bit skittish for a boy his age, Commander."
"Indeed." Spock made a mental note to download several texts on complex math for Jim when they returned to the Captain's quarters. After discussing what little they had learned from the planets' scientists with Scott, Spock herded Jim out of Engineering to a turbolift. Jim grinned up at him and held out his PADD. Spock tilted it to read and nodded. "Yes, Jim. Mr. Scot is proud of the ship's engines."
When the lift opened, Spock watched as Jim darted out and down the hallway. Following at a more sedate pace, Spock found himself considering how to keep the boy close should they not be able to restore him to the man he had been. He would need to speak to his elder self as well as his father when... if that were to arise. As they entered his quarters, Spock settled into the chair at his desk and ignored the packets of food peeking out from Jim's hiding place under the desk. After downloading several math texts into a PADD, Spock nudged the packets more securely in their hiding place.
Jim came back through from his quarters moments later. His face had a smudge of food along one corner of his mouth. He held his PADD out as he approached.
Spock read the PADD and shook his head. "No, Jim. I do not require any compensation for showing you Mr. Scott's domain."
Pressing his lips, together Jim gestured to the room at large.
"Nor are you required to earn lodging in the manner you have been forced to in the past."
Jim brows drew together and he shook his head. He tapped rapidly on his PADD and then shoved it towards Spock.
The text made Spock sigh. He turned in the chair and clasped his hands, rubbing at the bandage McCoy insisted he wear until this evening with his thumb. "You are a child and should be provided for so that you may grow and learn." Spock retrieved the PADD from the desk that held the math texts and held it out to Jim. "This is for you to study."
Jim had that lost look again as he took the PADD.
Spock leaned back slightly. "Perhaps you would eat lunch with myself and Dr. McCoy."
Looking up from the PADD in his hand, Jim pressed his lips together and then he frowned deeply. With a shake of his head, Jim retreated to the bed.
Spock watched Jim become absorbed into his new math texts. Turning, Spock began running new models to see if there was a new outcome.
"He could eat here."
Pulling out of his research, Spock looked over at Jim. The boy had a determined expression and was nervously turning his PADD over and over in his hands.
"Indeed, Dr. McCoy would find a shared meal enjoyable."
Jim looked up from twirling his PADD and nodded.
****
(Part 2)
Author: whiteraven1606
Artist: chosenfire28
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairings: Spock/Kirk/McCoy
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Non-graphic mentions of past underage non-con/rape
Word Count: 23500
Summary: Jim Kirk gets himself de-aged and his crew can't figure out a way to fix it until Spock Prime makes a suggestion that leads to drastic actions.
Disclaimer: This is for fun. Please treat it as such.
Author's Notes: Thank you to nightshadow_t2 for the beta work, suggestions, and listening to my whining when the story just wouldn't stop. Thank you to the moderators at au_bigbang for their patience. Thanks to chosenfire28 for the wonderful poster. :) I love it. Please note that any remaining mistakes are solely of my own making, usually because of my dyslexia.
Link to the Art
Post at AO3
"We're as good as screwed."
Happy that none of the natives could hear them at that moment, Kirk rolled his eyes as Bones backed away from the panel separating them from the the scientist that Minister Lollis had politely shoved forward moments ago. "Now, Bones, you know that the honor is given to only one of us."
Bones narrowed his eyes and moved further away. Kirk had to bite the inside of his cheek not to smile as Bones edged behind Spock. Turning back to the panel, Kirk pressed the intercom button and spoke to the Minister about the possible problems that taking the gross smelling liquid could cause a human. He'd already decided that Spock with his dual physiology shouldn't touch the stuff. He'd almost rather Bones take it since it was less likely that Bones would be allergic than him, but that wasn't happening either. Kirk nodded as the Minister reassured him that it had been used numerous times before to show the truth of a prospective trading partner.
Before either of his officers could argue with him about it, or take the drug themselves, Kirk downed it in one gulp and carefully sat the glass back down. Behind him Bones started cussing and Spock was suddenly right beside him, hovering.
"I'm good." Kirk blinked. Well, no, maybe he wasn't. Grabbing Spock's arm for balance, Kirk leaned to one side as his head started spinning.
****
As Jim fell, Bones was already moving to catch him. "Idiot." Easing him to the floor, Bones glanced up at Spock as he calmly spoke to the Minister about what the hell had just happened. Not that Spock would word it that way. Bones scanned Kirk and raised his eyebrows at the readout. "Spock."
Spock turned towards him. "Yes, Doctor?"
Bones pried one of Jim's eyes open and frowned at the look of the pupil. "He isn't allergic, but I don't like the look of his vitals."
Nodding, Spock turned back to the Minister and they argued over letting Kirk go back to the ship. Bones looked up as the panel parted and the scientist came forward timidly. When Bones looked back at Jim he froze for a moment. Turning Jim's arm carefully, Bones watched as his skin rippled. "Fuck."
Spock was next to him in an instant and they watched helplessly as Jim's body started changing. Bones spared a glance at the Minister and his pet scientist and worried more as they seemed genuinely surprised at what Jim's body was doing. Trying to decide if anything he had with him could help, Bones checked his tricorder again. As he looked back to Jim, he noticed that the Minister was smiling.
Shooting up, Bones got right into the Minister's face. "Why the hell are you smiling?"
"You are most blessed. Rarely does the Showing give such bounty."
Shoving down the urge to punch the man's very inviting nose, Bones turned back to find Spock cradling a small Jim in normal Jim-sized clothing. Trying to control his breathing, Bones dropped heavily to his knees and checked this tiny version of Jim over as thoroughly as he could. Looking up at the beaming crazy standing beside his smiling scientist that Bones wanted to smack, he narrowed his eyes at them. "How does this prove anything to you?"
The creepy smile widened and Bones was restrained by Spock's hand on his arm as the Minister started spouting how their method was the most productive manner for choosing trading partners. Torn between shaking off Spock to break the Minister's face and trying to make sure Jim was okay, Bones was developing a splitting headache. Spock stood up slowly and in no uncertain terms and in very polite language that made Bones' temples throb, insisted they return to the ship with Jim.
Bones wasn't surprised when the Minister had backed up a step and quickly agreed to allow them to return later to continue their negotiations. As they rematerialized in the transporter room, Bones picked up Jim's little body, trying to keep his clothes mostly in place. "This had better be as important as Starfleet insists it is."
Spock's eyebrows flattened and he helped arrange Jim on the gurney that had quietly appeared. "This star system has several rare elements and minerals that would be of great value to the Federation."
"Yeah, and what's Jim? Worthless pawn?"
Spock tucked Jim's little hand under the blanket Chapel had spread over the unconscious body. "Pawns are often the most important player." Spock stepped back. "Even more so when the Captain is playing."
****
It didn't take long to figure out that something was horribly wrong with Jim beyond him being a child. Bones reran the latest scan, vainly hoping it would give a different result. "When you're an adult again Jim, I'm going to kill you." Stabbing at the controls, Bones ordered several more scans. Then he went into his office and started putting in the passwords to unlock the parts of Jim's file that covered Jim's childhood that he'd never had reason to pry into. When he hit a pass-lock that required two officers to override, Bones commed Spock and fumed as he waited for Spock to come down from the bridge.
Without any preamble, Bones shoved his PADD at Spock. "Override this."
Spock looked over the file and sat the PADD down on his desk. "I will not."
Bones could have screamed, but instead he cussed and slammed his coffee cup down hard enough to crack the handle. "Dammit, Spock. I need to know why Jim looks like he's about to starve to death. It's locked in that file. I just need another officer of sufficient rank to override it."
It looked like Spock grew another centimeter as he stiffened. "The Captain requested I never be party to that portion of his file."
Rubbing his hand through his hair, Bones considered the problem. If Jim knew that Spock shouldn't see something in his file either it was something Jim would be ashamed of Spock seeing or something that would emotionally compromise Spock. It was an older file than the loss of Vulcan and Jim didn't really have a setting for shameful. Bones grabbed up the PADD and rechecked the date on the file. "Oh, no. No, no, no. Dammit. Of all the stupid things not to tell me."
Bones threw the PADD back down on his desk and stomped out to readjust the settings for Jim's biobed now that he knew what was actually wrong. Spock silently followed and stood beside Jim's bed as Bones worked. Once he was satisfied, Bones pushed himself up onto the next biobed over, next to where Spock was standing.
"You ever look at the date on the files he didn't want you to see?"
Spock crossed his arms. "Yes." He lifted his chin that tiny amount which usually made Bones mad, but right now just made him more tired. "He appears to require that we know nothing of his childhood that is not something he himself has told us."
"Tarsus IV, Spock."
"Indeed."
Bones sighed. "Yeah, I'd cuss too." He knew Spock was preoccupied with worrying when he didn't argue that he'd not used foul language. "You have any idea what happened to him? Really?" Spock shifted his weight and Bones turned to stare at him. That wasn't normal for Spock, which just made Bones' day that much better. God, he needed a drink.
"The Captain has said nothing of value."
Bones rolled his eyes. "I knew that, you pointy eared hobgoblin."
Spock did that thing with his eyebrows that made Bones wanted to figure out how to copy it, if only to annoy Jim with it someday. As Spock started to speak the biobed's alarm sounded and Bones was suddenly busy with Jim who had shot upright and was breathing hard.
****
The man made that soothing gesture adults all used when they wanted something. Jim pressed back into the wall and pulled the covers up higher. The other adult was different from anyone Jim had seen on the colony. The pointed ears and green skin tone marked the guy as Vulcan. Jim jerked away as the human adult moved closer.
"Dammit, Jim. Calm down."
The Vulcan's eyes changed and Jim stared at the sight. He'd always heard that Vulcan were emotionless, but this Vulcan's eyes were warm. Like his mother's when she wasn't trying to be brave or was just distracted. "You should refrain from using inappropriate language, Doctor."
Jim squirmed away as the Doctor tried to get a hand on him even as he glared at the Vulcan. "I'm sure even at this age he's heard it before, Spock."
They both looked down at him and Jim sat very still. They didn't look like all the adults he was used to seeing. Neither of them looked hungry. His stomach growled at the thought of being full.
"Perhaps Jim would benefit from a tour of the ship."
Jim blinked. Ship? He wasn't on the colony? He looked around, but everything looked like that infirmary he'd been in before. Of course, he'd been in bad shape so his memory of it was pretty fuzzy. He looked back at the adults who were gazing at him. Tucking the blanket tighter under his chin, Jim shrugged.
The Doctor hmphed. "Fine. We'll stop at the mess and see if Jim's up to eating anything." Jim was up and off the biobed so fast he lost the blanket. He pressed back against the wall next to the Vulcan, Spock. He watched the adults bicker about who was going to be responsible for him. It wasn't the way things worked. Nothing he'd seen so far was right. Maybe he was in a dream.
That certainly made better sense than anything else he could think of, because he didn't want these adults to be like the ones he was used to. He liked the look of them. The calm they both had about them that said they hadn't seen what he'd seen. Didn't know what he'd had to do to survive. Jim blinked as he suddenly yawned. The Doctor was in front of him and Jim hadn't seen him move.
"How about you lay back down for a while."
Jim shook his head and moved along the wall away from the Doctor. He cringed as the adults moved to block him in. Breathing harder, Jim tried to figure out how to escape. He needed a place to hide and rest. Away from the Doctor. He seemed nice, but all adults seemed that way until they weren't. The Vulcan cocked his head and Jim watched him as he pulled the Doctor away and they started arguing. Jim slipped down the wall until he got to a door and when it whooshed open he went through it. Moving quickly, Jim started looking for a good place to rest. The ship was beautiful. Everything was so clean. Jim found a lift and pressed up against the wall as an adult followed him in.
"Captain, did Dr. McCoy let you go already?"
Jim stared at the pretty lady as she smiled at him. Why was she calling him a rank? He was just a kid...Jim looked down at himself. He was clean. Dealing with adults that seemed to know him that he'd never met. With no one else around that was from the colony. Time travel. That had to be it. Jim nodded.
"Alright. Would you like me to escort you to your quarters, sir?"
He had quarters? Defiantly time travel. Jim nodded again and the woman smiled down at him. He hung back a little so she'd pick the direction without expecting him to know where they were going as they exited the lift. When they reached a door on a level Jim hadn't seen before, the woman left him with a quick wave. Jim looked the door up and down. It hadn't just opened like the other doors. Jim turned and headed to the next door down. The little name plate read Commander Spock. That was a Vulcan name. Jim touched the door. Maybe it was the Vulcan from the infirmary. There couldn't be too many of them serving in his lifetime. He remembered his Mom talking about it to someone once. As he turned to go back to his door and hack his way in there was noise from down the corridor.
Not wanting to deal with another adult, Jim tapped the first code that came to mind and jumped slightly when the door just opened right up. Hurrying in, Jim panted in the warmer air of the room as the door closed behind him. Moving slowly around, Jim looked over everything. It was quiet and very clean. Jim climbed up onto the bed and laid down. He'd go to his room in a few minutes. He was just so tired.
****
Spock watched over McCoy's shoulder as Jim slipped out the door. "You must consider what the Captain might have survived when dealing with this version of Jim."
With a sputter, McCoy turned away only to freeze for a moment and then turn back. "You let him escape!"
"Yes." Jim had displayed elevated levels of stress each time either of them moved as well as when McCoy spoke. "He was not speaking. In the time you have known Jim when does he not speak when spoken to?"
McCoy blinked and stood with his mouth hanging open slightly. Then he turned and stomped into his office. Spock straightened his tunic and went to locate his de-aged Captain before he could compromise any of the computer's systems.
****
Spock stared down at the sleeping child in shock. He had not expected to find the Captain in his bed. The boy was curled up on top of the covers. He'd tucked himself into a protective posture that fueled Spock's speculation as to Jim's history. He carefully shook Jim's foot to wake him. Jim jerked awake and kicked him all at the same time. Spock didn't dodge the blow and held still as Jim scrambled away into the corner.
"Please refrain from injuring yourself as I would be required to escort you to the infirmary."
Jim rubbed his face and then shook his head.
Spock cocked his head and raised an eyebrow. "Do you speak?"
Blinking, Jim shrugged. Then he shook his head slightly.
"Very well." Spock held out a PADD. "Perhaps you would feel comfortable with writing instead."
Slowly, Jim edged forward and then snatched the PADD away before backing up until his back was against the wall.
"If you require you may sleep in my quarters."
Shaking his head, Jim back further away until he encountered a chair.
Spock sat on the edge of his bed. "I require nothing of you, Jim. You have quarters of your own. I will show you." Spock lead the way into the bathroom and keyed the panel to open the door into Jim's quarters. Made to look like a wall panel so that the Captain's quarters could be given to visiting dignitaries if necessary, the door to Spock's bathroom was usually used for quick meetings between himself and the Captain. Spock keyed the panel to unlocked mode and stepped through the doorway into his Captain's quarters. "These are your quarters."
Jim edged into the room and stared. There were little things that spoke to him. There was a chess set in the middle of a game on the desk. Jim moved forward and studied the board.
"We were interrupted and unable to finish the game you see in progress."
Looking up sharply, Jim furrowed his brow.
"We have engaged in play as often as our duties allow."
Jim tapped on the PADD and held it out towards Spock, tilting it for Spock to read.
"Yes, we are friends. You have claimed such a relationship several times in the past." Spock settled into the chair at Jim's desk and began programing the small replicator to Jim's new size. "As you are friends with Dr. McCoy. You insist on calling him 'Bones'. You have never explained why." Spock watched as Jim trailed his fingers across edges of items. He was unsurprised when a panel popped out that he had not known would open. Jim glanced at him and then pulled the panel further open. Spock stayed where he was and waited. When Jim brought out several small pouches Spock knew to be field rations, Spock kept silent as Jim tore into one and put the others back.
Partway through the pouch, Jim froze and looked up at him. Spock lifted an eyebrow. "If you are still hungry after finishing more food may be brought from the mess."
Jim frowned and his eyes darted from Spock to the door and back. Then he brought the food with him and moved closer to Spock. When he held the pouch out to Spock it made something in Spock's chest hurt until he drew a deep breath.
"I have eaten." Spock stood and Jim scrambled towards the bed with the pouch of food grasped tightly in one hand. Spock moved towards the connecting door to his bathroom. "I will endeavour to bring you more to eat, Jim. Please make yourself comfortable. The replicator has been given your new measurements so that you may make yourself clothing that fits."
He paused at the door to his quarters before exiting into the hallway and stood concentrating on his breathing for several minutes before proceeding.
****
Jim watched the Vulcan leave and as soon as the door closed he wolfed down the rest of the food in the pouch. Then he listened at the door and made sure Spock wasn't on the other side. Moving quickly he reopened the panel in the wall and pulled out all the food pouches. Sorting them by date he shoved several into a bend in the desk that few people noticed and the rest into a tiny space between the bunk and the wall. He searched the rest of the room and found several more spots with hidden food. All stable environment pouches so there was no worry of spoilage.
Jim checked the tiny replicator and grinned. His measurements were exact. Vulcans were cool with that ability to measure just by looking. Tapping the controls, Jim ordered up pants and a shirt for himself. Moving to the chess game Jim cocked his head and tried to decide if Spock was the black or white player. Then he looked around the room. They'd be wanting the adult him back. He'd have to return to his own time. He didn't want that. Jim pulled the finished clothing on and folded the scrubs from the infirmary carefully.
Maybe he could convince them to let him stay. Jim settled into the most defensible corner of the room as he thought it through. They had to send him back so he could grow up to be here as an adult. He'd just have to survive it. He'd grow up to have this if he did. It was something to hold onto when he went back. Jim tucked his head against his knees and dozed.
****
McCoy was still pissed, but he was too busy trying to break into Jim's file to indulge in a good temper tantrum that he felt he was entitled to have. When Spock strode into the room, Bones was ready to yell at him until he got a look at the set of Spock's eyebrows. Freezing, Bones stared.
"Please give me the PADD, Doctor."
Bones didn't hesitate. He watched as Spock entered his code and then he held the PADD back out. Taking it, Bones punched in his own code and waited for the file to open. "I thought you'd promised Jim."
Spock clasped his hands behind his back. "I will not read the file."
Bones glanced up as the file continued to load. "What happened?"
"Jim has hidden food within his quarters."
Blinking, Bones started reading through the file. "That was fast."
"Not the boy, the Captain."
Startled, Bones dropped the PADD. "What?"
Spock looked to Bones like he was about to explode. "He has modified the wall panels and has hidden field rations."
That was...logical, actually, given Jim's history. Bones shook his head at that horrible thought. "I'll corner Jim about it when he's an adult again. He isn't him in a little body, then? He's regressed to the boy he was."
Spock nodded. Bones refocused on the file and abruptly closed it. "Oh, God." He drew deep breaths, trying not to be sick. "Okay, okay." Spock titled his head and Bones tried to clam down before Spock broke his promise and read the file. "Keep your word to Jim. Don't read that. Ever." Bones pulled out one of his better bottles of liquor and poured himself a drink. He knew now why Jim had been acting like he was afraid of him. "Spock, you're probably the only person Jim is going to trust. I'm asking you as his friend to be very careful with him."
"I will endeavor do so." Spock poured him another glass when Bones' hands shook too hard to do it himself. "I must return to Jim. I have stated that I would bring him food."
Bones nodded. "Okay, go. I'll be fine, Spock." Bones ignored the eyebrow he got in repose and reopened the file and continued on. He was definitely going to kill Jim. Just as soon as he was adult again.
****
Spock entered Jim's quarters and narrowed his eyes at the boy huddling in the corner. He seemed asleep. Spock set the food down on the desk and checked the log for the replicator. He ordered several more sets of clothing in the style Jim had chosen. Carefully approaching Jim, Spock spoke his name in an attempt to wake the boy without getting kicked. Jim jerked his head up and then rubbed his eyes. Spock held out his hand. "I have brought food for you."
Jim scrambled up and eyed Spock's hand before leaning to the left to look past him. Spock stepped to the side and allowed Jim to slip past him towards the desk. As Spock watched Jim eat, he sat down making sure to keep in Jim's sight. "We will be required to return to the planet in the morning."
Jim paused with a bite of food partway to his mouth. He looked at Spock and then went back to eating.
"The Minister has made assurances that you will be returned to the proper age when we return to the planet."
Jim pulled the PADD to him and typed for a moment before holding it out to Spock.
"No, Jim. It is not time travel. You were an adult yesterday until you drank a substance to prevent myself or Doctor McCoy from doing so." Spock pushed the PADD back towards Jim. "You are very protective of the Doctor."
Blinking, Jim fingered the edge of the PADD. He looked down at the crumbs on his plate and then back up at Spock.
"I will retire. Please remain within your quarters. If you have need of anything you may contact Doctor McCoy or myself." Spock retreated to his own quarters quickly. He knelt to meditate. The stress and worry radiating from Jim had taken a toll on him. Spock carefully controlled his breathing as he calmed his mind.
****
When he rose from his mediation, Spock stilled as he caught sight of Jim curled under the covers of his bed. Cocking his head, Spock watched the boy sleep. After several moments, Spock moved, silently crossing his room, through the bathroom, into Jim's quarters. Moving left from the doorway, Spock began searching the room. After finding the third moving panel where there shouldn't be one, Spock froze as across the room several panels popped open all at once. Spock reflexively glanced at the ceiling.
The door chimed and then popped open to allow McCoy to enter.
"What the..." McCoy eyed the room and turned to Spock. "Where's Jim?"
"He is sleeping."
McCoy turned his head to look at the bed and then back towards Spock. "Not in here, obviously. What's all this?" He gestured at the open panels. "Curious about how much he's managed to hide?"
Spock pressed his lips together and straightened up.
"Oh, don't go all fucking Vulcan on me. I'm worried too."
Spock took several carefully controlled breaths. "He is accomplished at hoarding."
McCoy flicked through the pouches in one of the hidey holes. "Yeah, looks like it. He's a goddamn genius. Stupid kid."
"That is an illogical statement, Doctor."
With a grin, McCoy dropped to sit on the edge of Jim's bed. "Feel better now?"
Spock ignored that and sat down. "He had formed the theory of time travel to explain the situation to himself."
"That's not too bad. You know, Jim invited an older Vulcan Ambassador to visit next week."
He hadn't known that. There was only one Vulcan Spock knew Jim would extend an invitation to, and that was his older self. "He should be recovered before his visitor arrives."
"Yeah, well, just in case he isn't I wanted you to know. Jim was going to make it a surprise for you, so you don't know, alright?"
"I shall endeavor to keep quiet on the matter, although I do not understand the need to surprise me."
McCoy smiled and rubbed his hand through his hair. "Please, I'm not falling for that bullshit. You know why Jim wants to surprise you."
Spock actually wasn't certain, but he would not say so to McCoy. Instead he gestured to the open panels. "Do you know of any command that the Captain could use to make all the panels open at once?"
Blinking, McCoy looked around at the various panels. "Well, no. I suppose...You ever have the ship do something for you?" Rubbing the knuckles of one hand, McCoy looked at Spock. "I'd swear the ship sometimes does things that it shouldn't be able to do. I've heard patients say things sometimes about what the ship did to help them."
Spock touched a bishop with his finger as he considered that. "I require more data before forming a theory." He did not mention the various times he had observed the ship giving the Captain what he wanted even when it was not proper. Codes were the best example. "Is there a reason for your visit, Doctor?"
McCoy rolled his eyes and Spock cocked an eyebrow at him. "I just wanted to check on Jim."
Spock understood and lead the way through his bathroom into his quarters. Jim was still curled under the covers of his bed. The posture was defensive and he was unnaturally quiet. He watched as McCoy ran a tricorder over Jim.
"You have any idea why he likes your bed?" McCoy held out the tricorder towards him.
Spock took the tricorder and looked over the readings. "I do not. He appears to be healthy given the circumstances."
McCoy muttered to himself as he took the tricorder back. Spock ignored the comments as they were insulting and nothing he had not heard before. Spock lead the way back into the Captain's quarters and watched as McCoy sat down and fidgeted with his tricorder. Clasping his hands behind his back, Spock tried to decide what would be appropriate to say or if silence would be more acceptable to McCoy.
McCoy sighed. "He's in better shape than I'd have expected, actually." McCoy stood abruptly and started closing panels. "I know we tend to bicker a lot, but I think we need to call a truce until Jim's normal again."
Spock moved to help with the panels. "I agree that stressing the Captain is unproductive at this time."
"He wouldn't mind you using his bed, you know." McCoy gathered up his tricorder and moved towards the door. "Just be...careful. He's not Jim as you know him, okay?"
"Goodnight, Doctor." Spock waited until the door closed behind the Doctor before picking up the PADD left behind by Jim and moving through the bathroom into his own quarters. Jim was curled up and remained unnaturally still. "You are safe here, Jim."
There was a muffled noise from the bed and then Jim's head appeared above the covers. He blinked as Spock sat the PADD down near the bed.
"Please sleep, Jim. I will watch over you."
Jim yawned and patted the bed. Spock hesitated for a moment and then sat down where indicated. Jim reached out and then stopped, his fingers hovering over Spock's hand. Jim looked up at him and then stroked the back of Spock's hand with his fingertips. Spock was hit with the worry and near panic of Jim's feelings. He forced himself to relax his stiff posture and Jim curled into his side.
Spock tried to keep breathing as Jim emotions swept over him. He picked up an edge of a buried want and Spock ghosted his fingers over Jim's hair. The want bloomed and the panic ebbed away. Slowly, Jim drifted to sleep as Spock carefully rubbed his fingers over Jim's hair and down to the fabric covering Jim's small back. Leaning back, Spock allowed himself to slip into sleep with his hand resting on Jim's head.
****
Jim woke warm and strangely non-hungry. There was a hand on his head. Shifting slightly, Jim creaked an eye open and found himself looking at a pointed ear. Oh, right, the Vulcan, Spock. He'd not wanted anything, which Jim wasn't sure what to think about that. He wondered if Spock would try to make him do anything, or if he would remain the nice adult he was being now. Spock's fingers started rubbing on his neck. Jim felt heavy. He blinked slowly and yawned widely as his body relaxed. He liked Spock. He really hoped he'd continue to be a nice person. Jim slipped back into sleep.
****
Spock edged himself away from Jim and moved to sit at his desk. He had not promised the Captain he would not read the file he'd helped McCoy unlock. He'd only implied he would not. He paused with his fingers poised over the controls that would open the file. He looked at Jim sleeping fitfully and thought about the emotions he'd picked up from Jim while the boy had been awake and also while asleep.
Turning back, Spock opened the file. He read quickly and stopped as abruptly as he'd seen McCoy do. Closing his eyes, Spock forced control on his own emotions. He started reading again. Purposefully pushing himself to read as quickly as possible. As Spock came to video files he checked on Jim and turned the volume off before opening the first video. The PADD automatically put in subtitles when the volume was muted, but Spock didn't need them to know what was happening. The quality of the video was poor, but the boy in it was Jim.
Several minutes into it, Spock broke the PADD when he clenched his hands. Bowing his head, Spock tried to force down the rage he felt.
"I deserved it." Jerking his head up, Spock came face to face with Jim. He was standing, holding one elbow with his other hand. His feet bare on the carpet.
"Why do you believe that?"
Jim pressed his lips together and shook his head.
"You were not at fault." Spock pried his fingers from the sheds of the PADD. He stilled as Jim stepped forward and gently turned over one hand. "You were very brave and managed admirably in the circumstances given to you."
Jim looked up through his mussed hair as he checked over Spock's bleeding hand. "I wanted to live."
Spock dripped blood on the console and touched the emergency button to signal McCoy. "You did very well, Jim. I am proud of you."
Blinking, Jim grinned. Then he frowned and gestured at the remains of the PADD as he raised his eyebrows.
"I felt the need to understand. Your older self had requested I never access the information."
Jim nodded and patted Spock's forearm. Then he smiled sadly. "I like you."
There were foot steps outside Spock's door and he was not surprised when Jim retreated into his bathroom. He ignored most of the cursing and comments from McCoy as the Doctor treated the injuries he had inflicted on himself.
"What the hell were you thinking?"
Spock finished inspecting McCoy's work. "I do not know what you are referring to, Doctor."
"Don't 'Doctor' me, you overgrown green-blooded elf. He asked you never to access that file because he knew how much it would upset you."
"I am not upset."
McCoy rolled his eyes. "Whatever." He sagged, his shoulders slumping. "Spock, look...Jim is all bluster and ego right up until it is something that hurts. Then he clams up tighter than an airlock. If the kid will talk to you, let him. Please."
Spock looked towards his bed. "I understand, Leonard." He allowed McCoy to lead him to his bed. When McCoy pressed a hypo to his skin, Spock did not protest. "I do not understand why some humans act in the matter they do towards children." He couldn't control his descent into sleep as McCoy's drugs took him away.
Above him McCoy checked his tricorder. "No one does, Spock. No one at all."
****
Jim waited until the Doctor poked his head into the room and left again before getting up and taking several pouches of food and his PADD with him back into Spock's room. Hiding one of the pouches under Spock's desk, he climbed up beside Spock on the bed. He tucked the remaining pouches into the crack between the bed and the wall. Then he pulled up the file Spock had been looking at and, after a little hacking, opened it to where Spock had been. Muting the volume, Jim watched the vid play out on the tiny screen. He remembered that. They'd held him down and played with him because they'd found him out after curfew trying to gather plants that might prove edible. He wondered if they were still alive. He watched himself as though it was some other boy. Some other person being hurt and no one coming to the rescue.
Looking down at Spock, Jim thought that if he'd been there he'd have interfered. Checking Spock's hands, Jim decided the Doctor probably wasn't too bad. Going back to the PADD he advanced to a vid with a date he didn't remember. Curious, Jim opened the file and gasped. He dropped the PADD to the covers and groped for Spock's lax hand. He stared at himself. He looked horrible. Starved and desperate. The taunts from the men in the background washed over him as he read them and on screen he panted heavily.
He remembered why they'd recorded him. The leader had said he made such pretty memories. Just as he was about to shut down the vid with shaking fingers, the scene changed. He was pulled out of frame by someone. Then there was screaming, indistinct according to the subtitles. Jim stabbed the button to shut down the PADD. He wrapped his small fingers around Spock's long fingers and tried not to be sick. He was tired and the only thing that made it better was he wouldn't have to go back since it wasn't time travel.
He felt the PADD slid off his lap as he went to sleep, but Jim was too tired to care.
****
Bones slipped into Spock's quarters without sounding his arrival. He stood just inside the door and watched Jim and Spock sleep. Jim had draped himself across Spock's stomach, his ear against the spot where Spock's heart was. Moving forward, Bones sat down the food he'd brought and then checked them both over with his tricorder. Pleased with the readings for Spock's hands, Bones frowned at Jim's readings. He hoped that the adult version of Jim wouldn't be too mad when he learned Spock hurt himself from watching the file. He still couldn't understand why they'd kept those vids in there. He could understand needing them for trials, but after that...It just didn't make sense. As he started to back away, Jim's eyes popped open.
"Hey." He tried to be quiet and he pointed at Spock. "He's still sleeping. You okay?"
Jim yawned. Then he blinked at Bones before nodding.
"Good, good. I brought food, if you want some."
Jim frowned and pressed himself into Spock.
"No, I'm not asking you for..." Bones swallowed. "I'm not them, Jim. We're best friends and I wouldn't hurt you unless I had to."
Pressing his lips together, Jim edged towards him. Bones caught the PADD as it fell over the edge of the bed. Moving away, Bones sat the PADD on the desk and brought back the juice.
"At least drink something. You worry me, Jim."
Taking the juice, Jim watched him and Spock as he drank. Handing the empty cup to him, Jim yawned again and then frowned.
"You being tired isn't a bad thing, kid."
Jim looked up sharply at that. Blinking, he petted Spock's hand and watched Bones as he did.
Bones snorted. "He needs to sleep too, no matter what he says. I just helped a little."
With a nod, Jim laid back down and watched Bones with sleepy eyes.
****
Bones was happy that Jim seemed willing to go anywhere as long as he could be within a meter of Spock. It made it much easier to convince the boy to go with them to the planet. Watching him stare around the transporter room as they waited on Spock to come from the bridge made Bones wonder if this version of Jim had ever dealt with a transporter before. The boy stared at the console settings as Spock came in. Bones smiled as Jim pointed out something to Spock with excited facial expressions. Spock explained the transporter's abilities as Bones rechecked his bag one last time.
As they waited for the Minister to look over Jim, Bones rechecked his medical bag mostly to calm his nerves. He had everything he needed to stop or reverse any of Jim's allergic reactions. He'd been surprised by some of the things Jim was currently allergic to that he wasn't allergic to as an adult.
The Minister looked over Jim with obvious delight. It was all Bones could do not to punch him. As he watched Spock and the Minister hash out the mining rights while Jim more or less hid behind Spock. It was sadly amusing. Bones nearly jumped out of his skin when Jim darted away from the Minister's outstretched hand to his side. Gingerly setting his hand on Jim's shoulder, Bones smiled down on him.
"He won't touch you, Jim."
Jim edged closer to him as Bones turned his attention to the Minister's pet scientist as he approached with a glass of foul smelling liquid. The Minister came closer with Spock right beside him.
"Your Captain is a treasure, Doctor McCoy."
Bones glared at him. "You don't know the half of it." He motioned to the scientist. "That is safe to give him, right?"
The Minister beamed in that manic way that worried Bones all the more. "Of course. We would not endanger such wonderful trading partners as yourselves."
Bones suppressed the snort he wanted to make at that. He opened his tricorder as Spock handed Jim the glass and explained why he had to drink it. Jim looked up at Spock and smiled that beautiful smile of his that made Bones melt a little inside.
"Thanks for being nice."
Bones bit his lip at Jim's quiet statement. Jim eyed the glass of liquid and downed it in one gulp. Bones grasped his arm as Jim swayed. His tricorder started screaming and Bones started pulling the proper preloaded hypo from his bag before Jim even hit the floor.
Spock pushed back the Minister and knelt beside Bones and Jim. Bones didn't have to reach for anything as Spock was handing him what he needed before he could even open his mouth to ask. Yelling at Jim to stay here damnit, Bones stabbed him with several hypos and waited for the readings to change. Cursing when Jim's breathing started to become labored, Bones pressed in another hypo and hissed at Spock to get them back to the ship. As Spock spoke into his communicator, Bones stood up and advanced on the Minister.
"You had better hope he survives, you stupid asshole." Bones punched the sniveling Minister right in the nose, proud to hear the crunching of cartilage and bone. Turning back to Jim he ignored the shouts and yowling behind him as the transporter took them away.
****
Spock finally gave Uhura permission to accept the Minister's humble apologies for nearly killing the Captain several hours after Jim had stabilized. He felt too much unchecked rage to trust himself to see to it. Instead he hovered beside Jim's tiny form laid quietly on the biobed nearest McCoy's office. He could hear McCoy complaining to Chapel about the treatment of his knuckles' abrasions through the closed office door.
The formulas that the Minister's scientists had gladly given up were unhelpful in attempting to figure out how to return the Captain to his proper size and age. The assurances that this had never happened before did nothing to sooth Spock. There was nothing about the nannites used that made logical sense to Spock. Tapping on his PADD, Spock tried another model to see if that would help. When it ended with Jim's death, Spock shut down the PADD and sat watching Jim breath.
It took several minutes for McCoy to appear. He was fidgeting with his nearly healed hand as he approached. "He'll wake up soon, Spock."
Looking up at McCoy, Spock rose his eyebrow. "Indeed. Is your hand well, Doctor?"
McCoy flexed his hand and grinned. "Never felt better." He shifted his weight from one foot to the another. "Spock...I don't know any way of fixing Jim if their method won't work."
Spock reactivated his PADD. "I have not found any method that does not result in the Captain's death."
Blowing a hard breath out, McCoy dropped to sit on the edge of the biobed. "Shit." He rubbed his hand through his hair. "Well, we'll just have to tell StarFleet how well their important trading deal went."
"I have informed them of the beneficial outcome of the trade negotiations."
McCoy nodded. "And you told them about the Captain suddenly being a child."
"No." Spock sat the PADD down. "I have said nothing about Jim's current condition. He is listed as on medical leave for a nearly fatal allergic reaction."
Blinking, McCoy rubbed his forehead. "Nice to know who I have on medical leave." Then he sighed and looked down at Jim. "Okay. Any idea how long we can avoid telling StarFleet?"
Spock straightened a bit more than normal. "As long as is required."
McCoy grinned. "You're a good person, Spock." He stood and clapped Spock on the shoulder than then waved at Jim. "You can take him back to his quarters once he wakes up and I've looked him over."
****
Jim woke up and groaned. Blinking his eyes open he started at the sight of Spock far too close. Shooting up, Jim swayed as his head spun. Spock held out a glass of water. Jim gratefully drank, getting the horrible aftertaste out of his mouth.
"You had an adverse reaction to the re-aging agent."
Jim nodded and handed back the glass. He remembered not being able to breathe and the Doctor over him yelling something. He vaguely remembered seeing the nice nurse, Chapel.
Spock took the glass and put it down on the desk. As he came back he held a PADD. "Before you were reverted to your current age you invited a Vulcan dignitary to visit."
Cocking his head, Jim crinkled his brow.
"You will understand once you've read this." Spock handed him the PADD he'd been holding.
Jim watched him back up and sit down heavily. Glancing down at the PADD and then back up to Spock, Jim wondered what he could have done to weigh so heavily on the Vulcan. He focused on the PADD and read through the report on screen. Oh. Jim sat the PADD down carefully. Standing, Jim went to Spock and patted his knee. "I'm sorry."
Spock settled his hand on Jim's shoulder. "You saved Earth. You attempted to save Vulcan. You have nothing to be sorry for, Jim."
Jim darted back across the room, grabbed up the PADD, and brought it back with him. "He's you." He pointed at the line in the report. "Same name."
Spock took the PADD and sat it down beside the bed. "He came back through time in an attempt to stop what happened. He told you that we would become friends."
Jim smiled and nodded as he moved to lay back down. Then he frowned and looked at Spock.
"He will understand your current circumstances, Jim. I will endeavour to return you to your normal state before his arrival." Spock pulled the covers over Jim's small frame. "McCoy has informed me that you were going to surprise me with the visit of my elder self."
Jim patted Spock's forearm and grinned a little. Spock smoothed the wrinkles out of the blanket. Jim yawned as that heavy feeling came back. He liked this life. He didn't want it to end, even if it turned out to be a dream.
****
Spock had not expected to have Jim so happy to met an adult. As they moved through Engineering, Jim drifted more than a meter away from him as Scotty described everything the engines could do. Jim stared around them with wide eyes. As Jim followed Keenser into an alcove to look at a part of the antimatter reaction chamber's cooling system, Scotty stepped closer to Spock.
"Sir, I donna know what the Captain's life was like as a boy, but he's a bit thin." Scotty jerked a thumb towards where Jim was busy pouring over the equations that made the engine possible. "He's a bit skittish for a boy his age, Commander."
"Indeed." Spock made a mental note to download several texts on complex math for Jim when they returned to the Captain's quarters. After discussing what little they had learned from the planets' scientists with Scott, Spock herded Jim out of Engineering to a turbolift. Jim grinned up at him and held out his PADD. Spock tilted it to read and nodded. "Yes, Jim. Mr. Scot is proud of the ship's engines."
When the lift opened, Spock watched as Jim darted out and down the hallway. Following at a more sedate pace, Spock found himself considering how to keep the boy close should they not be able to restore him to the man he had been. He would need to speak to his elder self as well as his father when... if that were to arise. As they entered his quarters, Spock settled into the chair at his desk and ignored the packets of food peeking out from Jim's hiding place under the desk. After downloading several math texts into a PADD, Spock nudged the packets more securely in their hiding place.
Jim came back through from his quarters moments later. His face had a smudge of food along one corner of his mouth. He held his PADD out as he approached.
Spock read the PADD and shook his head. "No, Jim. I do not require any compensation for showing you Mr. Scott's domain."
Pressing his lips, together Jim gestured to the room at large.
"Nor are you required to earn lodging in the manner you have been forced to in the past."
Jim brows drew together and he shook his head. He tapped rapidly on his PADD and then shoved it towards Spock.
The text made Spock sigh. He turned in the chair and clasped his hands, rubbing at the bandage McCoy insisted he wear until this evening with his thumb. "You are a child and should be provided for so that you may grow and learn." Spock retrieved the PADD from the desk that held the math texts and held it out to Jim. "This is for you to study."
Jim had that lost look again as he took the PADD.
Spock leaned back slightly. "Perhaps you would eat lunch with myself and Dr. McCoy."
Looking up from the PADD in his hand, Jim pressed his lips together and then he frowned deeply. With a shake of his head, Jim retreated to the bed.
Spock watched Jim become absorbed into his new math texts. Turning, Spock began running new models to see if there was a new outcome.
"He could eat here."
Pulling out of his research, Spock looked over at Jim. The boy had a determined expression and was nervously turning his PADD over and over in his hands.
"Indeed, Dr. McCoy would find a shared meal enjoyable."
Jim looked up from twirling his PADD and nodded.
****
(Part 2)