(no subject)
So this is a story that I wrote a while ago and posted on a chenzel site. Take a gander if you want.
Title: I'll Be Seeing You
Rating: PG
Summary: Kristin Remembers
Notes: This is my first fic here. This was inspired by my grandpa who never seemed to forget the song "I'll be seeing you." Also many thanks to blowers_daughtr for looking it over and throwing ideas at me.
This was a familiar trip for Idina. Every day if life would allow her, she would go out to the nursing home to see her wife. She didn’t like the idea of living separated from her, but she could no longer take care of Kristin on her own. Kristin was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s six years prior. Idina cared for her as long as she could. She stuck by her, woke her up and dressed her every morning, got her through each day, then bathed her and put her to bed every night. But taking care of Kristin became too hard for one person, and Idina had no other alternative. Still she stuck by her wife and went to see her and take care of her in the nursing home every day.
Some days she would go and have lunch with Kristin. She would feed her, and afterwards go for a walk of the grounds. If they made conversation it was always a one way chat-Idina talking to Kristin, without much of a response.
Sometimes Idina would go at night, and have dinner with Kristin. With the help of the staff she would bathe Kristin, then they would sit in her room and chat, again, always a one way conversation. Idina would stay there until her wife was asleep. She would hold her hand and sing to her.
Kristin had her good days, where she would smile and sometimes hum or mumble when Idina was around as though deep down inside she knew who was with her. However, Idina didn’t even view her “good days” as “good days”, until she compared them with the bad days Kristin sometimes had. Some days Idina would walk in and greet Kristin only to have her panic, and get so worked up the nursing home staff had to administer a tranquilizer. Idina didn’t stay long on those days.
Though Idina would visit Kristin almost everyday and tell her about everything that was going and bringing up as many memories as she could, it seemed as though her beloved wife slipped away more quickly after she entered the nursing home.
This evening Idina was praying on her way to the home for a good night. When she arrived a nurse pulled her aside.
“She’s been asking for you,” the nurse stated calmly
“What do you mean?”
“She keeps asking, ‘When is Idina coming?’”
“She remembers my name?” Idina asked with tears welling in her eyes.
“Idina, often times if and when an Alzheimer’s patient remembers things it is a sign that they are nearing the end.”
Idina shook her head. This couldn’t be the end; she wasn’t ready for it. She allowed herself to shed a few tears before collecting herself and asking to see her wife.
“Hey Kris,” Idina said when she walked into the room.
“What?” Kristin asked turning her head toward Idina.
“I just came to see you.”
“Oh,”
“How are you doing sweetie?” Idina asked sitting down in front of Kristin who was seated in her rocking chair looking fairly uneasy. Her eyes darted around the room as though she was nervous about something.
Kristin had aged more rapidly since this disease had taken over her body. The gentle laugh lines that had delicately traced her face had become just wrinkles. Her golden hair had quickly lightened and become white. The slight upward curve at the corners of her mouth that made it look like she was wearing a constant smile had drooped making it forever a slight frown. With her memory went the sparkle in her blue eyes. She had become a small child wandering lost in a place that was very unfamiliar and scary.
“It’s gone,” Kristin said quietly, finally letting her eyes come to rest on her left hand. With her right hand she was fiddling around with her ring finger looking for what she knew should have been there.
Idina reached up and held the chain around her own neck where Kristin’s wedding ring now resided. About a month before when she had come in for her daily visit a nurse had handed her Kristin’s wedding ring and told her she should probably have it for safe keeping. When she asked why it had been removed the nurse explained that Kristin had been biting at her finger in what seemed like and attempt to get it off, and she stopped biting when the staff had removed it.
“It’s okay Kris.”
“No, it’s gone.” A single tear made its way down her face, and Idina understood that she was remembering. “She will be mad.”
“Who will be Kris?”
“My wife. I lost my ring.”
“No, she won’t. Your wife could never be mad at you.” Idina scooted closer to Kristin and took the smaller woman in her arms slowly, so not to startle her. Idina tried willing Kristin to remember, wishing that she could take Kristin’s place, wishing that she would wake up next to her wife in their bed only to realize that this was all a terrible dream. Sadly though, this was no nightmare; this was the harsh reality she had to face and had been facing for the past six years.
“I’m tired. I want to sleep.” Kristin mumbled into Idina’s shoulder. Idina led her over to the bed and tucked her in.
“Sing?” It was Kristin’s one word request that Idina simply couldn’t deny her. Settling on the tune that had become their favorite since Kristin was diagnosed; Idina sat down next to Kristin’s bed, grabbed her wife’s hand and began to sing in a light coo, trying to lull the smaller woman to sleep.
“I’ll be seeing you, in all the old familiar places, that this heart of mine embraces all day through.”
“Beautiful voice,” Kristin said groggily, “like my wife.”
Idina smiled and kissed the small hand that she held before continuing. Idina had to close her eyes and push through to keep from crying.
“I’ll be seeing you in every lovely summer’s day; in every thing that’s light and gay. I’ll always think of you that way.”
Soon she heard a light humming of the tune and opened her eyes to find Kristin looking at the ceiling as if trying to count all the holes in the tiles above her. Kristin remembered the tune and was humming along.
“I’ll find you in the morning sun and when the night is new. I’ll be looking at the moon,” Idina stopped there.
“But I’ll be seeing you.” Kristin finished the last line of the song, though barely above a whisper. As blue eyes met hazel Kristin’s face lit up, her eyes began to sparkle, and everything came rushing back to her. Smiling for the first time in years she said, “I love you Idina.”
“I love you Kristin,” Idina said standing up and kissing her wife’s forehead. Idina sat back down next to Kristin’s bed. She entwined their fingers and waited for Kristin to drift off to sleep.
Idina watched her wife sleep peacefully. As Kristin’s soft steady breathing filled the room Idina closed her eyes and imagined the two of them back in their house sleeping together in their bed. A smile pulled at the corners of her mouth as she let herself be immersed in the memory for a few minutes before standing to leave. As she opened the door to leave the room she allowed herself a glance back at where Kristin lay on the bed and saw the smiled that graced her face. Her wife, the woman she fell in love with had come back to her, only for a moment, but she had come back. Knowing that, she sighed contended and she allowed herself to turn and leave, closing the door with a soft click.
The next morning at 6am Idina got a phone call from the home telling her that Kristin had died in her sleep that night. Idina broke down crying at the loss of her wife, then just as suddenly, she stopped. She realized that with all of the hardships they had gone through in the last six years, Kristin had died remembering who Idina was.
Idina got up and got ready for the day ahead of her. She didn’t know how well she was going to be able to handle everything. She had a lot of things to prepare and plan for.
“First things first,” Idina said grabbing the chain with her wife’s wedding ring, “this has to go back where it belongs.”
Title: I'll Be Seeing You
Rating: PG
Summary: Kristin Remembers
Notes: This is my first fic here. This was inspired by my grandpa who never seemed to forget the song "I'll be seeing you." Also many thanks to blowers_daughtr for looking it over and throwing ideas at me.
This was a familiar trip for Idina. Every day if life would allow her, she would go out to the nursing home to see her wife. She didn’t like the idea of living separated from her, but she could no longer take care of Kristin on her own. Kristin was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s six years prior. Idina cared for her as long as she could. She stuck by her, woke her up and dressed her every morning, got her through each day, then bathed her and put her to bed every night. But taking care of Kristin became too hard for one person, and Idina had no other alternative. Still she stuck by her wife and went to see her and take care of her in the nursing home every day.
Some days she would go and have lunch with Kristin. She would feed her, and afterwards go for a walk of the grounds. If they made conversation it was always a one way chat-Idina talking to Kristin, without much of a response.
Sometimes Idina would go at night, and have dinner with Kristin. With the help of the staff she would bathe Kristin, then they would sit in her room and chat, again, always a one way conversation. Idina would stay there until her wife was asleep. She would hold her hand and sing to her.
Kristin had her good days, where she would smile and sometimes hum or mumble when Idina was around as though deep down inside she knew who was with her. However, Idina didn’t even view her “good days” as “good days”, until she compared them with the bad days Kristin sometimes had. Some days Idina would walk in and greet Kristin only to have her panic, and get so worked up the nursing home staff had to administer a tranquilizer. Idina didn’t stay long on those days.
Though Idina would visit Kristin almost everyday and tell her about everything that was going and bringing up as many memories as she could, it seemed as though her beloved wife slipped away more quickly after she entered the nursing home.
This evening Idina was praying on her way to the home for a good night. When she arrived a nurse pulled her aside.
“She’s been asking for you,” the nurse stated calmly
“What do you mean?”
“She keeps asking, ‘When is Idina coming?’”
“She remembers my name?” Idina asked with tears welling in her eyes.
“Idina, often times if and when an Alzheimer’s patient remembers things it is a sign that they are nearing the end.”
Idina shook her head. This couldn’t be the end; she wasn’t ready for it. She allowed herself to shed a few tears before collecting herself and asking to see her wife.
“Hey Kris,” Idina said when she walked into the room.
“What?” Kristin asked turning her head toward Idina.
“I just came to see you.”
“Oh,”
“How are you doing sweetie?” Idina asked sitting down in front of Kristin who was seated in her rocking chair looking fairly uneasy. Her eyes darted around the room as though she was nervous about something.
Kristin had aged more rapidly since this disease had taken over her body. The gentle laugh lines that had delicately traced her face had become just wrinkles. Her golden hair had quickly lightened and become white. The slight upward curve at the corners of her mouth that made it look like she was wearing a constant smile had drooped making it forever a slight frown. With her memory went the sparkle in her blue eyes. She had become a small child wandering lost in a place that was very unfamiliar and scary.
“It’s gone,” Kristin said quietly, finally letting her eyes come to rest on her left hand. With her right hand she was fiddling around with her ring finger looking for what she knew should have been there.
Idina reached up and held the chain around her own neck where Kristin’s wedding ring now resided. About a month before when she had come in for her daily visit a nurse had handed her Kristin’s wedding ring and told her she should probably have it for safe keeping. When she asked why it had been removed the nurse explained that Kristin had been biting at her finger in what seemed like and attempt to get it off, and she stopped biting when the staff had removed it.
“It’s okay Kris.”
“No, it’s gone.” A single tear made its way down her face, and Idina understood that she was remembering. “She will be mad.”
“Who will be Kris?”
“My wife. I lost my ring.”
“No, she won’t. Your wife could never be mad at you.” Idina scooted closer to Kristin and took the smaller woman in her arms slowly, so not to startle her. Idina tried willing Kristin to remember, wishing that she could take Kristin’s place, wishing that she would wake up next to her wife in their bed only to realize that this was all a terrible dream. Sadly though, this was no nightmare; this was the harsh reality she had to face and had been facing for the past six years.
“I’m tired. I want to sleep.” Kristin mumbled into Idina’s shoulder. Idina led her over to the bed and tucked her in.
“Sing?” It was Kristin’s one word request that Idina simply couldn’t deny her. Settling on the tune that had become their favorite since Kristin was diagnosed; Idina sat down next to Kristin’s bed, grabbed her wife’s hand and began to sing in a light coo, trying to lull the smaller woman to sleep.
“I’ll be seeing you, in all the old familiar places, that this heart of mine embraces all day through.”
“Beautiful voice,” Kristin said groggily, “like my wife.”
Idina smiled and kissed the small hand that she held before continuing. Idina had to close her eyes and push through to keep from crying.
“I’ll be seeing you in every lovely summer’s day; in every thing that’s light and gay. I’ll always think of you that way.”
Soon she heard a light humming of the tune and opened her eyes to find Kristin looking at the ceiling as if trying to count all the holes in the tiles above her. Kristin remembered the tune and was humming along.
“I’ll find you in the morning sun and when the night is new. I’ll be looking at the moon,” Idina stopped there.
“But I’ll be seeing you.” Kristin finished the last line of the song, though barely above a whisper. As blue eyes met hazel Kristin’s face lit up, her eyes began to sparkle, and everything came rushing back to her. Smiling for the first time in years she said, “I love you Idina.”
“I love you Kristin,” Idina said standing up and kissing her wife’s forehead. Idina sat back down next to Kristin’s bed. She entwined their fingers and waited for Kristin to drift off to sleep.
Idina watched her wife sleep peacefully. As Kristin’s soft steady breathing filled the room Idina closed her eyes and imagined the two of them back in their house sleeping together in their bed. A smile pulled at the corners of her mouth as she let herself be immersed in the memory for a few minutes before standing to leave. As she opened the door to leave the room she allowed herself a glance back at where Kristin lay on the bed and saw the smiled that graced her face. Her wife, the woman she fell in love with had come back to her, only for a moment, but she had come back. Knowing that, she sighed contended and she allowed herself to turn and leave, closing the door with a soft click.
The next morning at 6am Idina got a phone call from the home telling her that Kristin had died in her sleep that night. Idina broke down crying at the loss of her wife, then just as suddenly, she stopped. She realized that with all of the hardships they had gone through in the last six years, Kristin had died remembering who Idina was.
Idina got up and got ready for the day ahead of her. She didn’t know how well she was going to be able to handle everything. She had a lot of things to prepare and plan for.
“First things first,” Idina said grabbing the chain with her wife’s wedding ring, “this has to go back where it belongs.”