The Well of Love Has Run Dry

[wind_up_girl]

Maybe not entirely, but that's how I feel some days. Though to be fair I felt that way for about 18 months off and on. Once again I find myself in a crying jag and resolving to break up with the boyfriend. I'm not sure why I'm such an unhappy person these days. Is it my job and professional decisions (which I have adopted a "0 fucks given" attitude

Comments

[seraphsoliloquy]

Have you talked to him about your concerns? If your experiencing frustration, it might help to just get it out there. Knowing what I do about your guy, he seems like the sort who would want things to work out for the better. Are you of the feeling that he does not want to get married and that is part of what is causing you anxiety?

[wind_up_girl]

We have, usually after the resentment bubbles over. It's been discussed several times and each time nothing really changes. On more casual mentions it's a non-committal sound (not quite a grunt) or maybe a one-worded answer. He's said he's thought about marrying then brought up some reasons not to yet; the concern was finances or getting his family in one area. But, when I suggested some solutions he just had a, "Yeah, we'll see..." response.

:/ He may want to get married one day, but I don't think he wants to marry me.

[wind_up_girl]

For the record, I've tried bringing this up at cheery times as well as making it clear that I'm not interested in waiting too long. Especially regarding kids. The best excuse he's given yet is that it's such an adult move and it intimidates him. Whiiiiiiiccchhh... doesn't add to my confidence that it's going to happen.

[meryl_jed]

You could also possibly add "seasons are changing" to the disclosure list. It is not uncommon for dips in emotional states during the autumn and winter...sorry, that isn't terribly helpful.

[wind_up_girl]

That is, actually!