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[winkingfuchsia]

My school e-mail is usually relatively free of junk e-mail. So when I get one, I end up reading it. Please enjoy a sample from an e-mail I received today from a wise poet named "Gwendolyn B." I have retained original text spacing and punctuation for your benefit.

Curses, like chickens, come home to roost A bad penny always turns up. He who

Comments

[anonymous]

kb's email : junk mail :: kb's livejournal : new posts, or so I thought... but it seems that summer has changed all that. Good. This is a good change. In related news, last I checked, bananas are high in fiber, but they also attract mosquitoes, so I suggest apples or brown rice to cure what ails you. However, before you go making any drastic diet changes, you should know that I consider most of my closest friends to be highly irregular, and a timely and efficient digestive tract would have little to no effect on my opinion of you.

-TG

[davidjmcgee]

Oh, boy! I got this doozy yesterday:

"Hi, Friedrich

I am a lovely and lonely Lady who is looking for the man who will make me happy and whom I want to feel like in paradise with!
If you want to be my beautiful Hero who will save me from this loneliness find me
[website redacted for the benefit of my soul]
and wake me up with a warm kiss.

goodbye
Galinochka B."

"whom I want to feel like in paradise with" is an example of the little known 'unjunctive' since huh?

Mm, spam. Wait I mean, 'ah, spam.'

~Dave
(I also like how she made sure to let me know it was from Galinochka B. so that I didn't have to sit here wondering which Galinochka sent me this e-mail)

[mofish6]

Fiber: whole grains, green veggies (I like broccoli), tomatoes, apples yes. They actually make these awesome crackers in Italy called "digestives" that are high in fiber and really really yummy. I like to eat them with nutella, which sort of defeats the purpose, but not if you eat enough of them. Yay, fiber.