[fic interlude] Robin's journey toward self betterment (Pt 1)
Rating: PG
Summary: Where Robin has been. So far. On his journey to make himself better. :D *THUMBSUP!?!?!!?!* The dumb hobag.
Notes: He is dumb. :|
It has been six days since Robin left Chicago. When he initially bought the plane tickets, it had seemed like the only option he had. The only people he cares about exist in Chicago so if he gets out he can't hurt someone he cares about. The reactions he got from the people who found out he was leaving especially Ruvin (and even Scout) have left him feeling less confident about the decision. It's not enough to make him turn around.
His inquiries, which started with a First Angel in England, have lead him to a small village in the Himalayan mountains. It's run by a Vengeance Angel who claims that meditation and self-discipline are the keys to controlling the rage. Self-discipline is demonstrated by controlling pain, keeping vigilant in the face of adversity, fasting, and facing the temptation to be angry.
Robin has walked on a bed of hot coals, let snakes slither all over him without moving a muscle, has not eaten more than three times since he arrived, and smacked a young archangel over the head with a bottle of vodka. He still has no idea what any of this has to do with fixing any of them. He's tried self discipline and relaxation techniques before. It's not as if this is anything novel, but it provides a controlled setting for practicing so he stayed.
When he meditates, his mind drifts to Chicago and to the past. The look on Ruvin's face when he grabbed her commonly interrupts his solemn 'trance' as does her Please and the feeling of her clinging to him. Then his mind spirals into worry. Is she alright? Does it really matter so much that he isn't there? Is the puppy being taken care of? Is Dusty watching out for them both? Has Scout calmed down? Is Grace disappointed? Has any of them died? Do any of them hate him for leaving?
Is Vincent Sterling still annoying? Wait, he knows the answer to that one.
He ends up being the only vengeance angel with an expression that more closely resembles pain than relaxation.
"You're not trying hard enough that's all it is." The leader does not like him, because Robin is older than any other vengeance angel, but is not relaxed which discredits his theory.
"No, no. I'm sorry, but no matter how much I 'Ohmmmm' and starve myself and face ridiculously, literally painful situations and try to become 'one' with 'nature', it doesn't take away how I feel. It doesn't make me more okay with what happened to me, and I certainly can't relax when all this time thinking, excuse me, meditating only makes me think of them."
"Maybe you don't want it enough," he says with a pointed, pompous look that makes Robin want to punch him.
"I came all the way here, didn't I? I've got the best, most important reason to want this. I've got..." The annoyance drifts from his voice as it sounds strange talking about people who are so far away. People that it feels like he's betrayed in so many ways. "I promised her I'd come back."
The leader raises an eyebrow at him. "Who?"
"Never mind. It doesn't matter," Robin winces, clenching his jaw and moving on as soon as the pain fades enough for him to think, again. "The point is that your little camp doesn't live up to reputation, and it's not working. It's time someone got the truth out there before you disappoint many others with your supposed miracle treatment."
For the first time, the leader shows a lack of self control. Anger seeps into his expression. "It's working for the rest of us. I have yet to fail any of my students. Maybe you're different than most vengeance angels. Maybe it's too late for you."
Robin punches him and leaves the next morning.
Summary: Where Robin has been. So far. On his journey to make himself better. :D *THUMBSUP!?!?!!?!* The dumb hobag.
Notes: He is dumb. :|
It has been six days since Robin left Chicago. When he initially bought the plane tickets, it had seemed like the only option he had. The only people he cares about exist in Chicago so if he gets out he can't hurt someone he cares about. The reactions he got from the people who found out he was leaving especially Ruvin (and even Scout) have left him feeling less confident about the decision. It's not enough to make him turn around.
His inquiries, which started with a First Angel in England, have lead him to a small village in the Himalayan mountains. It's run by a Vengeance Angel who claims that meditation and self-discipline are the keys to controlling the rage. Self-discipline is demonstrated by controlling pain, keeping vigilant in the face of adversity, fasting, and facing the temptation to be angry.
Robin has walked on a bed of hot coals, let snakes slither all over him without moving a muscle, has not eaten more than three times since he arrived, and smacked a young archangel over the head with a bottle of vodka. He still has no idea what any of this has to do with fixing any of them. He's tried self discipline and relaxation techniques before. It's not as if this is anything novel, but it provides a controlled setting for practicing so he stayed.
When he meditates, his mind drifts to Chicago and to the past. The look on Ruvin's face when he grabbed her commonly interrupts his solemn 'trance' as does her Please and the feeling of her clinging to him. Then his mind spirals into worry. Is she alright? Does it really matter so much that he isn't there? Is the puppy being taken care of? Is Dusty watching out for them both? Has Scout calmed down? Is Grace disappointed? Has any of them died? Do any of them hate him for leaving?
Is Vincent Sterling still annoying? Wait, he knows the answer to that one.
He ends up being the only vengeance angel with an expression that more closely resembles pain than relaxation.
"You're not trying hard enough that's all it is." The leader does not like him, because Robin is older than any other vengeance angel, but is not relaxed which discredits his theory.
"No, no. I'm sorry, but no matter how much I 'Ohmmmm' and starve myself and face ridiculously, literally painful situations and try to become 'one' with 'nature', it doesn't take away how I feel. It doesn't make me more okay with what happened to me, and I certainly can't relax when all this time thinking, excuse me, meditating only makes me think of them."
"Maybe you don't want it enough," he says with a pointed, pompous look that makes Robin want to punch him.
"I came all the way here, didn't I? I've got the best, most important reason to want this. I've got..." The annoyance drifts from his voice as it sounds strange talking about people who are so far away. People that it feels like he's betrayed in so many ways. "I promised her I'd come back."
The leader raises an eyebrow at him. "Who?"
"Never mind. It doesn't matter," Robin winces, clenching his jaw and moving on as soon as the pain fades enough for him to think, again. "The point is that your little camp doesn't live up to reputation, and it's not working. It's time someone got the truth out there before you disappoint many others with your supposed miracle treatment."
For the first time, the leader shows a lack of self control. Anger seeps into his expression. "It's working for the rest of us. I have yet to fail any of my students. Maybe you're different than most vengeance angels. Maybe it's too late for you."
Robin punches him and leaves the next morning.