i like responding to poems with other poems; any other comment is just a failed atempt to expound upon a feeling, decribe or apraise the original work. but i also like to be clear and concise. you are a good poet. you are a terrible writer, but that isn't important. poetry as a medium is lacking; when a new poem is born it needs fresh air, freedom to grown in the mind of the reader. that being said, i think it would be good if you linked pictures you take with poems that you write. obviously this is hardly a new concept, but dylan i have a good notion that this is something you would excell at. and more importantly it is something i would enjoy and i believe other people would also respond better too. there's just something about surrealist imagry in free verse that puts me out. i really enjoy it, as i really enjoy your poems, but i always feel like there might be a better chance for "appricition" if a visual aid that may or may not corrispond to the work was presented along side it.
ok so here's what i think about this poem. good vocab. it flows from one good image to the next. it seems to reveal the feelings of the author and also inspires new feelings in the reader. snappy ending, 'singular gesture of eternity.' style and form more or less direct, obviously more impressionist landscape in the surreal as you seem to favor these days. but... what's so great about this poem? why would anyone want to see it in print? would you publish it? i know you don't care about that, it isn't the reason you write, but i get the feeling this is just one poem in a series of connected poems that should all be together in one volume. it would reveal the content as an interconnected pattern of ideas that drawn upon eachother. or maybe im just looking forward to reading more.
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