(no subject)
Okay, I know I haven't seriously posted recently, but I've been in several bitchy moods, and I've been busy...and I'm lazy. So shoot me.
So for your update: my parents and I are *still* fighting. It seems we'll never get it out of the way, I'll be forty years old and they'll still treat me like I'm ten. Shove off, see if I care anymore. Is college over yet? Can I move out? PLeasE?
Andrew....I don't even know where to begin with that kid. He's...just...ugh. You kno? He is happier...that girl he's been drooling over likes him...I think. Her parents don't like Andrew though...so there's a problem. They don't know that Andrew and her are ...dating? I don't think that's even the right word for it, but it's the closest thing I can think off. Whatever.
I've been on a terrible music kick. Like, I used to listen to music, some of it good, some not so good, but it wouldn't really matter to me either way. I just listened for the sake of listening. But lately everything I listen to has to have meaning, has to be deeper than it seems. And things are more moving (ie that face down song). Suddenly I find myself CrYiNg???? During music of all things? What?! I'm not that big of a girl that I cry during songs....but I am. WTF?! Whatever....I don't care that much...it's just weird.
Then, and this is really bothering me to no end, a friend of Andrew's who I sort of talked to, left for school at the end of June. And ever since he left he's been making a point of calling my cell, or im-ing me, or whatever almost everyday. He asks me for this weird advice...stuff guys should ask other guys about. And! Oh my god, this bothers me a lot. He's coming home for two weeks. TWO WEEKS, to see all his friends, spend time with his family, and go back to school...and he says "Sarah we HAVE TO hang out while I'm home..." is that weird, or am I paranoid?
And, to top it off....I've completely stopped doing anything good for me...like my running? I just got lazy and stopped. I don't feel like running. I'd rather do nothing all day. What's with that...I don't get it. I'm big on the summer lazy thing...but this is different. I don't care that I'm not running. And when I look at food I'm not thinking (okay...I just have to run an extra 20 minutes if I'm gonna eat that.)
On the topic of food...I'm not eating well. It scares me so much...I'm barely home for dinner anymore, between work and spending time at Ryan's...I never eat dinner at home...let alone eat something good for me. Or eating enough. I eat small meals...and they are junk. My mom has started to notice...it's one of the things we fight about. She thinks I'm trying to diet or something. Honestly I'm not...I'm happy with the way I am....I just don't have the TIME to eat well. Which is bad, because I'll end up having another sophmore year, with the fainting spells. Last night, driving home, I was worried I was gonna pass out before I got there. I got home and I couldn't even stay awake...I don't think I fell asleep. I think I honestly fainted in bed. I worry about shit like that...what if, when I move out...I have a spell and get hurt...and there's no one there to help me. I won't know what to do...
Whatever, it's not as bad as it sounds. I don't mean to worry anyone...I just needed to write it all out, and now I feel better about it. But yea...
Okay, so I'm gonna post new entertaining video's as often as I can...I'll try to everyday, but sarah gets lazy :D
Goodness...I wish I knew these kids!