How high can you ride?

[wolfe_guardian]

Back in September, I made a post asking why I decided to get so drunk I would vomit. Shortly thereafter, I ended up getting into therapy. Within two weeks, I had been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. I had pretty much diagnosed myself as such by that point, but hearing it come from someone legally licensed to do so was extremely

Comments

[lykomancer]

To be honest, getting so drunk I vomit-- even alone-- isn't particularly noteworthy. It doesn't happen often, but sometimes I misjudge my limits. (A whole bottle of sweet red wine is generally a bad idea.) Eh. I don't even think my depression plays into that. (Perhaps it does on a lower-than-conscious level, but I wouldn't know about that.)

Other people's expectations are the worst of it day-to-day, I think. The crippling despair of the depression itself is huge, monstrous, but the expectations... Somehow, it seems like those should be something accomplishable. Like you can handle that stuff because it seems reasonable, unlike the bloated body of the disease. But when you can't, it's crushing. It feels like a personal failing, even though the expectations aren't reasonable all the time. Just because they seem so, doesn't make them so.

[wolfe_guardian]

I read your post about blowing up at Jinya. I gotta tell you, I get it. I didn't think I would be living with my parents for this long when I moved back here, and I'm so glad to finally be out. I am lucky, though, that I have had so many people offering me a place to stay, I just knew if I had to pick a place besides my parents' that whoever it was would have to really consent to me being a financial burden and already have a stable household.

[wolfe_guardian]

Truth is, you should've yelled at me like that three years ago. I did so much more evading back then, and I didn't have anywhere near the amount of baggage I have now. =-/

Keep on fighting the good fight.