Title: You made me smile, I made you smile
Pairing: Suho/Chen
Rating: PG-13
Length: 7741 words
Warnings: Embarrassment, probably inaccurate portrayal of drunkness, drunk texting, unexpected and probably unnecessary angst
Summary: Jongdae has a crush on his landlord and it tends to cause him both embarrassment and suffering.
Notes: I started writing this literally almost a year ago for
this prompt at exopromptmeme and it grew into a lot more than just what the prompt said. Also I literally spent almost a year on it. Sorry, prompter. You've probably forgotten about it. Anyway, it's finally off my back. Yay! Thanks for this year, fic. It's been a long one. Also yay for random title and summary.
Jongdae really regrets buying so much food at once.
His four grocery bags were all full, and he thought it would go well until he arrived at the entrance of his apartment building and one of the bags gave out, the groceries falling onto the floor.
With a loud groan Jongdae puts down his three other bags before they break, too. He bends down to look wistfully at the fallen groceries as he tries to figure out how to get all his goods to the fifth floor when the rest of his bags are full. “Why does this always happen to me?” he pouts to no one in particular, because there is no one else there.
Until he hears Kim Junmyeon's voice behind him. “Oh, what happened?”
Jongdae turns around and wonders if Heaven has sent him an angel when he sees his landlord, who has apparently just entered the building and looks slightly surprised at the sight before him. Even though this is really not the time, Jongdae takes a moment to appreciate Junmyeon's good looks; his kind eyes, pink lips, his soft-looking dark brown hair...
Then he remembers that his landlord might want an answer to his question. “I put too many groceries in too few bags and one broke and made a mess,” he rambles, grimacing.
Junmyeon nods in understanding. “Would you like some help getting your stuff upstairs? You look like you have your hands full.”
“No, you don't have to do that, it's okay, really, I'll figure something out-” Jongdae begins, but the elder cuts him off by shaking his head.
“Jongdae, it's fine, I want to help,” says Junmyeon with a pleasant smile, and Jongdae really likes the way his landlord says his name. He wonders if the other likes saying his name. Probably not; Jongdae's just his tenant, after all, one in several. Still, he doesn't mind all that much. “I should have a few extra plastic bags in here.” Jongdae's landlord starts digging through his bag, a concentrated look on his face that breaks into another smile as he pulls out two plastic bags and bends down to start filling them with his tenant's groceries.
“Thanks for the help, you're like my saviour or something!” Jongdae smiles happily when they have arrived safely outside his apartment. He pulls out his keys while his landlord chuckles at his words. “Hey, if you're not busy, you should come inside and I'll make you coffee as thanks!”
While Junmyeon seems to consider the offer (which Jongdae was not at all nervous about suggesting, thank you very much) Jongdae unlocks the door and enters his apartment, bags in hands. He's only a few steps into the apartment before he stops to look back at his landlord.
“Are you coming? I'd be forever grateful to you if you brought those bags inside as well,” he says with a hopeful smile, nodding at the bags Junmyeon is holding. Somehow it looks unfairly adorable when the older man slightly pouts in thought (Jongdae is definitely not staring at his landlord's lips) and then shrugs, claiming “Why not?” as he follows Jongdae into the apartment with that really beautiful smile. (No, he is still not staring. Okay, maybe he is staring a little.)
When they have placed all of the groceries where they are supposed to be, Jongdae sits Junmyeon down in the kitchen before making them both a cup of coffee. As he brings the cups to the table Jongdae absently wonders how bad his crush on the gorgeous older man is, and if it's going to get any worse.
He sits down across his landlord with a friendly smile, taking a sip of his coffee. “Really, thanks for the help, Junmyeon-ssi. I think I might have freaked out a lot more if you hadn't come along,” he states.
Junmyeon hums softly in answer and takes a small sip of his own coffee before speaking. “How long have you been my tenant now, Jongdae?” he asks - not unkindly, but rather curiously. Jongdae doubts his landlord is capable of being unkind at all.
He takes a moment to think back to the day he moved into the apartment. Chuckling under his breath as he remembers how flustered he was when he first saw how hot his landlord was he replies, “Five months, I think. Why?”
“I think we've known each other long enough for you to call me hyung, don't you?” Junmyeon smiles, and when he does, his eyes turn into pretty crescents that make Jongdae want to cry a little. As the older's words register in his mind, though, his face breaks into a smile too.
“I guess so. Thanks, hyung!” Jongdae laughs.
They sit there for half an hour chatting over their coffee until Junmyeon remembers he has somewhere to go. He leaves Jongdae wondering if the look he saw in his landlord's eyes was fondness and if Junmyeon is this friendly with all of his tenants. It makes him think of another person, angular features and a pretty smile that deceived Jongdae until-
Jongdae shakes his head, angrily stomping the memory off. It's in the past.
-
Three weeks later, Jongdae heads out of his apartment while texting Jongin. His best friend isn't coming to Chanyeol's party because he'll be with his boyfriend and Kyungsoo isn't keen on parties, but he promised Jongdae that he would pick him up whenever his friend asked. Jongdae thinks he might be a bit too dependent on his best friend sometimes.
In the stairwell he meets Junmyeon, who gives him a sunny smile. He notices that his landlord has bleached his hair and absently thinks that it looks good on him. “Hello, Jongdae. Heading out?”
“Hi! Uh, yeah. I'm going to a party.” Jongdae tries to match his landlord's smile and at the same time not seem too excited about talking to him. Junmyeon nods slowly, running a hand through his bleached hair.
“Sounds fun! Well, I hope you have a good time,” Junmyeon beams, placing a hand on Jongdae's shoulder.
Feeling energized by his landlord's friendliness - and maybe a little excited about being touched by Junmyeon - Jongdae grins. “Thanks, hyung. Have a nice evening!” he says before turning to leave. He stops again, though, and turns back with a smile.
“I like your hair, by the way! It looks cool.”
Jongdae decides that it was definitely worth it when Junmyeon's eyes turn into beautiful crescents at the compliment. “Thank you, Jongdae. I'll see you around.”
Finally, Jongdae turns again and leaves, not noticing the fond gaze in his landlord's eyes as Jongdae's shoulder slips away from his hand.
-
Jongdae is one of the first people to arrive at Chanyeol and Baekhyun's apartment; when he comes in, he sees Sehun and Zitao draped over each other on the couch with a glass of wine each. He never pegged them for the wine type, but at least they're not starting out early with the heaviest drinks. Maybe, just maybe, he's making comments in his head because he's jealous. Maybe he just misses having a relationship sometimes.
In the kitchen he finds Baekhyun opening a bottle of beer. “Hey, loser, good to see you. Beer?” The other boy offers him the bottle, but Jongdae declines. “Later,” he explains.
Baekhyun shrugs and takes the beer for himself, taking a sip as he leans against the counter. “Chanyeol wanted to bleach his hair this morning. I told him it'll look like shit and that I didn't want to be seen with him in public if he did.”
Jongdae lets out a snort at that. “Chanyeol with blond hair? I'm not even dating him and I wouldn't want to be seen with him like that.” Then he remembers Junmyeon with his newly bleached hair. He looked really good.
Jongdae thinks maybe he is more invested in his landlord than he initially thought.
-
At some point Jongdae starts drinking. It doesn't take long before he feels flushed and oddly light. It takes longer for him to realize how drunk he really is.
He finds himself pointing at Yixing, being dreadfully reminded of the past. “Jonghyun, you're such a piece of shit, y'know? It was really shitty of you to be like that. You're fucking things up for me even now, with the guy I like. It's your fault, you dickhead,” he slurs, jabbing his finger into Yixing's chest. “It's your fault that I'm an idiot!”
“Jongdae,” says Yixing, gently grabbing Jongdae's wrist, and that's when he recognizes the voice that is decidedly not Jonghyun's.
He stops, biting his lower lip. “Yixing-hyung, I'm sorry,” he mumbles. Yixing's a nice guy; no need to take it out on him.
Chanyeol gives him a worried frown and places a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, Jongdae, you look kinda out of it, maybe you should get home. Jongin's picking you up, right?”
“Yup yup yup, he is. I'm just gonna text him,” Jongdae nods too many times and his head spins a little, but he pulls out his phone and starts looking through his contacts. Finding “Kim J”, he opens the message app and texts Jongin.
[To: Kim J-------]
[1:32 AM] Hey com get me man im drnk
[From: Kim J-------]
[1:32 AM] Um, okay, sure. Where are you?
Jongdae pouts at the reply; why doesn't Jongin know this?
[To: Kim J-------]
[1:33 AM] Wtf do u not no where park chanyeol lives???
[From: Kim J-------]
[1:35 AM] It's fine, I'll find it. Stay safe, Jongdae-ah!
[To: Kim J-------]
[1:35 AM] Okay i love u
In his drunken haze, Jongdae doesn't consider what might be wrong with Jongin. Instead he glares at the person who just shoved past him and takes another shot that was on the table in front of him, scrunching his face at the taste. It's only when Chanyeol taps him on the shoulder that he turns to the door. “There's a guy here to pick you up but it isn't Jongin, he says he's your landlord?” says the tall guy with a confused look on his face. Said face looks flushed, but Chanyeol doesn't seem very drunk. Maybe he decided to be responsible tonight, Jongdae thinks absently. Good on him. “Uh, Kim Junmyeon?”
Hearing the name startles Jongdae. “Oh yeah, that's him,” he mumbles, repeating it more loudly when Chanyeol doesn't hear him. “Yeah, I'm leaving. Tell the others 'toodles' for me, will ya? Toodles!” Jongdae pats his friend's chest and goes to get his jacket.
There are ridiculously many jackets in the hallway, and Jongdae struggles to find his until a hand taps his shoulder. Turning around, he sees Kim Junmyeon holding his jacket out to him, and sort of feels like swooning at the sight because his landlord's blond hair is a beautiful kind of messy (also he is feeling a bit dizzy because of the alcohol). He really doesn't need the mocking memory of Jonghyun holding out his jacket for him right now. As he snatches his jacket out of the Junmyeon's hand and puts it on, Jongdae pouts and comments, “Junmyeon-hyung! You're not Jongin.”
Junmyeon looks perplexed, but Jongdae misses it while putting on his jacket. “No, I'm not, but you texted me to come get you.”
“Nuh-uh, did not.” Jongdae shakes his head, but decides to not question the situation and opens the door to leave.
As soon as the cold air hits him, Jongdae freshens up a little and starts jumping up and down. “Ahhhh, it's so cold!” He turns to Junmyeon. “Hyung, aren't you cold?” The older man shakes his head, but Jongdae walks up to him anyway, claiming “You look really cold, hyung,” and starting to rub Junmyeon's arms. He absently notes that his landlord seems a little uncomfortable.
“I'm not cold, Jongdae-yah. Let's get you home, shall we?” says Junmyeon with that gentle voice, though his tone suggests that he won't accept anything else. Jongdae wiggles his eyebrows.
“You sound sexy when you're being strict,” he grins. Junmyeon chuckles softly, and Jongdae counts that as a win, even if the elder still looks slightly uncomfortable; probably at having to handle his drunk tenant.
They get to Junmyeon's car eventually, after Jongdae stops walking at least ten times to talk to Junmyeon because he's unable to focus on talking while walking. Jongdae settles in the passenger seat with a content sigh, but as soon as his landlord starts the car, a pout emerges on the younger's face. He's starting to get tired now, drunk in the comfortable seat of his landlord's car.
“I can't believe you're so hot,” he whines, softly enough that Junmyeon doesn't hear him over the sounds of the motor. Jongdae wriggles a little in his seat and sneaks a peek at his landlord, as if it's something he's not allowed to do. “You're so cute,” he says, louder. This time Junmyeon glances at him without turning his head.
“Do you think so or is it only drunk Jongdae who thinks so?” he asks, and Jongdae is too worn out to hear the slight quiver in his voice. Instead, he pouts harder.
“I definitely think so, hyung. You're, like, super hot and cute and nice at the same time and it's actually very frustrating.”
Junmyeon doesn't comment on that, but Jongdae doesn't mind. This way, he can keep talking. The alcohol gave him courage that he previously didn't have, and maybe now he can actually talk to Junmyeon.
“I also really like you.” Junmyeon tenses. Jongdae is too drunk and caught up in his own words to notice. “The thing is that I'm kinda scared of relationships, you know?” His speech had been slightly slurred before, but now that he's getting tired it's more like mumbling. “Jonghyun really messed me up, hah.”
Jongdae groans as he thinks about his ex. “And then I moved here and got you as a landlord. You perfect, sexy man. Why the hell did I get you as a landlord?”
“Bad luck, I guess,” Junmyeon says quietly.
“But I like you,” Jongdae whines. “You're, like, an angel or something.” He yawns loudly.
“Let's talk about this when you're sober, yeah?” Junmyeon comments curtly. “How was the party?”
A drunken Jongdae is an easily distracted Jongdae, and he launches into a short retelling of the more interesting parts of the party. His speech gets slower and more slurred the longer he talks and it isn't long before he dozes off.
-
He can barely remember where he is when Junmyeon gently nudges him awake. “We're here,” Jongdae hears through the haze. “Wow, you really are drunk.” Jongdae shrugs.
Somehow they get to the front door of Jongdae's apartment and Junmyeon asks where Jongdae's key is. “Back pocket, I think,” he slurs, and everything is a little off after he fell asleep in the car, but he doesn't miss the way Junmyeon fumbles. “What, you don't wanna touch my ass?” Jongdae grins dumbly and pats Junmyeon's chest a little. “You sweetie.”
Junmyeon shakes his head and pats his own pockets, eventually pulling out his own key. He unlocks the apartment. “Hmpf, I hope you don't use that key to go through my stuff when I'm not home,” Jongdae remarks as they enter the apartment, ignoring the feeling of something rising in his throat.
“Why would I- whatever, you're drunk. Time to go to bed,” Junmyeon replies.
“Yes! Beeeed. Y'know, you should- join me,” says Jongdae, trying to focus on his landlord who's standing in front of him. Then the feeling in his throat becomes too much to ignore and he holds up a finger. “Hold on - I need to throw up.” He rushes to the bathroom.
After emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet, Jongdae groans loudly and shakily stands up. Junmyeon is leaning against the door frame, watching him with a slightly amused expression.
“Okay, now I'll go to bed.” Jongdae yawns unattractively and walks right past Junmyeon and to his bedroom, flopping onto the bed with another groan. “Goodniiiiight,” he mumbles softly. He feels a blanket being pulled to cover his body, his shoes being pulled off and Junmyeon's gentle voice telling him goodnight and he falls asleep with a pleased smile on his face.
-
Jongdae awakens to the shrill sound of his alarm somewhere and groans, wondering why he has an alarm on Sundays. He has a splitting headache, is one of the first things he notices as he sits up, clutching his head and whining. “Oh God, why,” he moans and falls right back into his bed without turning off his alarm, pressing his eyes shut in the hopes that ignoring it hard enough will make it stop.
When he finally realizes that the sound is coming from the hallway and is not stopping, Jongdae sits up again and crawls out of bed, trying to steady himself before walking. He picks up his phone from the dresser in the hallway and turns the infernal alarm off before dropping the phone into his pocket when he sees a note lying next to where his phone was. Jongdae's head is killing him, but he squints to read the note anyway.
Good morning! I had to leave but I bought ice cream for your hangover and put aspirin on your kitchen bench. Feel better! ^_^
“Who the fuck is this,” Jongdae mutters to himself, staring at the note in confusion before shuffling over to the kitchen to get some ice cream and aspirin. He munches on a Cornetto and pulls out his phone again.
As he in his hungover state stares at his phone screen, Jongdae thinks that he really needs to be more careful with drunk texting.
The name “Kim Junmyeon” glares mockingly at him. Underneath is a text from his landlord. Before Jongdae properly looked, he assumed his landlord was texting him about apartment business.
This is definitely not apartment business.
[To: Kim Junmyeon]
[1:35 AM] Okay i love u
[From: Kim Junmyeon]
[7:33 AM] Isn't it a bit early in our relationship? Maybe we should go on a date first :-)
The events of last night are still blurry to Jongdae but seeing the texts he sent his landlord, he starts to remember sending them. He wails in embarrassment. Then he receives a new text.
[From: Kim Jongin]
[9:12 AM] Are you okay? You didn't text me to pick you up
[9:12 AM] Did you get home or did you stay at Chanyeol and Baekhyun-hyung's place?
[To: Kim Jongin]
[9:13 AM] I'm alive and at home but my head is actually killing me
[9:14 AM] Also i think my landlord brought me home and i texted him “i love u” by accident
[9:14 AM] How's your day going?
Jongdae resists the urge to throw his phone at a wall when his best friend replies with a series of laughing emojis. Instead he finishes up his Cornetto and takes an aspirin tablet before calling up Jongin.
The younger is not much help, at least according to Jongdae.
“I don't know, hyung, maybe you should just....talk to him?”
“I can't just talk to him like nothing happened, can I? Something happened and I can't remember exactly what I told him but it was definitely something stupid.”
“Well, that's not new. You always do something stupid in front of that guy.”
“......I do, don't I?”
“Literally the only reason he doesn't realize you have a big crush on him is that he's an idiot and is busy harboring his own crush on you, you idiot.”
“Hey, don't be rude- really?”
“The point, hyung, is that you're both super obvious and please do something about it without my help.”
Jongdae rolls his eyes even though Jongin can't see it, but his heart is thumping loudly in his chest. “You really think that he's into me?”
“YES, goddammit,” Jongin exclaims through the receiver. “Now can we please end this? I love you and all, but Kyungsoo-hyung and I are going to spend the day watching movies in bed and I'm not having you ruin this with your Junmyeon-crisis. Just tell him your issues and get to dating him or something.”
Then Jongin hangs up, and Jongdae is left glaring at his phone for a few seconds before dropping it on the counter. He drinks two large glasses of water and goes to curl up in his bed, sleeping off his hangover.
-
Jongdae doesn't take Jongin's advice. Instead, he does the opposite and actively avoids Junmyeon. Normally Jongdae would jump at a chance to talk to his landlord, but this is not a normal situation, so he hides in his apartment when the man is in the building and sneaks around whenever he goes outside.
Jongin calls him an immature idiot. So does Kyungsoo, either while Jongdae is talking to Jongin on the phone or when he comes to Jongdae's apartment a few days after the incident, but the older ignores it.
He's grateful that Junmyeon doesn't press the issue and seek him out, though he'd kind of like to talk to the older again. A week after the incident, he's moping, and it's only then that he realizes just how much he enjoys at least seeing Junmyeon. As he carries a large bag of groceries up the stairs of the apartment block, Jongdae spots his landlord moving his way. By now, he's gotten so used to avoiding the older male that he automatically scrambles to run past him, grocery bag held up to hide his face.
Thinking that he's gotten away successfully once again, Jongdae internally rejoices. Then he hears, “Oh, Jongdae, hi,” and stops in his tracks, slowly lowering his bag and turning around to face his landlord. He smiles awkwardly and he can feel his heart beat loudly in his chest. “Hi,” he grits out, internal rejoicing turned into internal screaming. So much for good luck.
“Do you have a minute?” Junmyeon asks. His hair is now back to the beautiful soft shade of brown, though probably dyed rather than regrown. Jongdae takes a second to consider his options before deciding that he doesn't have any. Instead he opts for a quick getaway.
“Uh, actually, I think some of my eggs cracked just now, I should really check that so they don't ruin everything else in the bag...” Jongdae scratches the back of his head, not meeting his landlord's gaze.
“Oh. I could help if you want,” the older offers, and Jongdae wants to punch something because Junmyeon is still so nice and perfect even though Jongdae is avoiding him.
“No, that's not necessary, I just have to...go! The eggs are going to make a mess... See you around!” Jongdae laughs nervously and runs past Junmyeon to get to his apartment. He isn't sure, but he thinks he hears Junmyeon sigh and wishes he was able to be a mature adult for once.
When he enters his apartment, safe from cute landlords, he leans against the door and sighs in relief. “I'm such an idiot,” Jongdae mumbles to himself.
Jongin looks up from his phone where he is lying on Jongdae's couch. “Yeah, you are,” he says blatantly. “Are you sure you don't want to ditch movie night and go talk to your beloved? You need to get over yourself.”
“You say that like you weren't exactly as stupid with Kyungsoo,” Jongdae points out.
A laugh comes from the kitchen. Kyungsoo enters the living room with a bowl of popcorn in his hands. “Ah yes, the constant running away from me. That was gold,” he adds helpfully, and Jongdae chortles. Then Kyungsoo fixes him with a Look. Jongdae falls silent at once. “Don't be like Jongin, Jongdae.” Jongin whines slightly like he's offended, but it is ignored. He stops, though, when Kyungsoo settles in next to his boyfriend on the couch, and his arm automatically goes around the smaller boy. For a second Jongdae just gazes at them, feeling slightly envious of their relationship. He goes to put the groceries in the kitchen, partly to not have to watch the pair being cozy with each other.
“Hurry up, hyung, so we can put on the movie!” Jongin's voice comes from the living room after a short while. Jongdae grabs a bottle of soda and plops himself down on the sofa next to the couple. They look disgustingly content, he notices, and thinks of Junmyeon as he starts the movie.
It's only a few minutes into the movie when the screen goes black, and so do the few lights that were on. “What...just happened?” Kyungsoo asks slowly, looking around him in confusion but not getting out of Jongin's grasp.
“I have no idea, it should be- shit,” Jongdae says, realizing what's wrong. “I may have not paid the rent...”
At first his friends just gape at him. Then Jongin bursts into laughter. “You didn't pay the rent? You idiot, why would you not pay your rent?” Jongdae flushes, and Jongin blinks in realization. “You're avoiding your landlord. Oh my God, Jongdae-hyung.”
“It was only supposed to be temporary!” Jongdae exclaims in embarrassment. Okay, so he may have been planning on avoiding Junmyeon for the rest of his life, but realistically he knew that wouldn't be possible as long as he lived here.
He makes the decision before he gets a chance to overthink it and bail. “Okay, I'm going to go and pay it personally. I'm trusting you two to not ruin my apartment,” says Jongdae with a pointed look at his friends.
Kyungsoo sits up and waves him off. “Just go, pay the rent and talk to the guy, properly, okay? We'll put the time to good use.” With these words he grins at Jongin, whose eyes light up. Pulling Kyungsoo down to him, he kisses the older.
Meanwhile, Jongdae finds his wallet and shoes. “Don't have sex on my couch!” he calls as he leaves the apartment, eager to avoid watching his friends make out.
-
The walk up to his landlord's apartment feels longer than it is. When he is finally standing outside Junmyeon's door, Jongdae hesitates. I could always pay electronically and keep avoiding him, he thinks, fist lifted and ready to knock.
Then he shakes his head. It's about time he stopped acting like a child. He tentatively knocks on the door, heart picking up speed even if he might end up just paying the rent and nothing else.
It takes a short while before the door is opened. When it is, Jongdae is greeted with the sight of Junmyeon in ruffled hair, jeans and a shirt that seems to have been put on in a hurry because it looks slightly messy. His eyes seem to light up a little when he sees Jongdae, but it might be wishful thinking on Jongdae's part. Part of Jongdae wants to grab his landlord and kiss him senseless because shit he looks hot. The other part wants to run the fuck away before he faints.
“Hi,” says Junmyeon, fixing his shirt as he glances at Jongdae, a small friendly smile in place. “Can I help you?”
The thought that maybe Junmyeon isn't alone occurs to Jongdae then. “I'm sorry, am I disturbing anything?” he asks quickly, praying that the answer is no.
“Oh, you’re not! I just got out of the shower, nothing else,” Junmyeon explains quickly. Jongdae tries not to sigh in relief. “What's up?”
“I just came to pay the rent because, as I'm sure you know, it's kind of overdue and I just had the power taken away.” Jongdae fidgets, not daring to look straight at his landlord for several reasons.
“You could do that online, you know,” Junmyeon points out, but opens the door further to let his tenant into the apartment.
“I know. I thought maybe we could...talk a bit. Since I'm here,” Jongdae explains and bites his bottom lip. Coming here was such a bad idea, he thinks even while entering the other's apartment. He might as well get it over with since he is here anyway.
Junmyeon stops and looks at Jongdae, lips parted. It has Jongdae's heart lifting because maybe Junmyeon has been waiting for an explanation, wants an explanation, maybe there is a chance. “Sure,” is what comes out of his mouth.
When Jongdae has paid his rent, finally, Junmyeon looks at him curiously. “What did you want to talk about?”
“Um -- us?” Jongdae grimaces. “And that night I got drunk and...you know.”
The older nods thoughtfully. “Go on,” he encourages.
Taking a deep breath, Jongdae decides to start where the incident started. “I didn't mean to text you,” he begins. “I was going text my friend Jongin to come pick me up from the party, but the two of you have really similar names and, well, I was drunk. Not that I didn't want you to pick me up. If anything, that was just because I'm a really embarrassing drunk... As you've probably figured.” He thinks Junmyeon is laughing softly at that. “So all the stuff I texted you wasn't actually meant for you.”
“So, that one text wasn't meant for me but for your friend?” Junmyeon questions. “Are you two...”
“No!” Jongdae almost shouts, wanting to stop that train of thought at once. The 'I love you' text was so not meant like that. “No, never in a hundred lifetimes, no. Jongin's my best friend, nothing else. We're close, and I was drunk. So really...that message didn't mean anything at all.”
Somehow Junmyeon looks a little disappointed. “What about... Do you remember what you said to me when I picked you up?”
“Oh, God.” Jongdae hides his face in his hands. “I vaguely remember some embarrassing stuff.”
It's quiet for a few seconds, a strangely comfortable silence, until Junmyeon breaks it. “Did you mean it?”
Peeking at his landlord from between his fingers, Jongdae sighs, supposing it's best to do it now before he runs away again. “Yeah,” he breathes.
“You said - you said you were afraid of relationships.” Junmyeon worries his lower lip, looking every bit as nervous as Jongdae. That's what makes the decision for Jongdae. What better time to come clean than now?
“A while back, before I moved here, I was dating this one guy,” he begins. “His name was Jonghyun, not that that's important but I think I mentioned his name to you. Anyway, I thought we were happy together, until I came home to see him having sex with some guy I've never seen before. So, obviously, I screamed at him like hell and hit him repeatedly and I'm sure you can figure out for yourself that I didn't exactly want to be with him any more.”
Taking a deep breath, Jongdae continues. “After that, I was just... I don't know. I was crushed, because I thought he was the love of my life. And I couldn't stay there, so I more or less swore off men and moved away, and I came here. And then there was you. I always thought you were really attractive, but you're my landlord and I'd just gone through a horrible breakup. I guess... That's why I'm so afraid now. I'm just terrified of going through something like that again. You don't seem like the kind of guy who would cheat on someone, but I can't help thinking about it. Every time you get close, I just... I start to think of him and I get scared.” Jongdae lets out a long sigh after saying so much, and having to think about his ex again, everything he has hidden in hopes for it to go away so he can have a relationship without being scared.
“Oh,” seems to be all Junmyeon can think to say, understandably enough.
“So that's that. Part of the reason I've been avoiding you. The other part being immense embarrassment about saying all of those things that I did when I was drunk.” Jongdae laughs nervously, running a hand through his hair. “I should go. I really hope I get the power back because I have two friends downstairs who are waiting to have a movie night.”
“Wait,” Junmyeon starts, “Jongdae-” But Jongdae is already on his way out the door.
-
“So, what, that's it? You just left?” Jongin asks when Jongdae comes back to the apartment, where he found Jongin and Kyungsoo snuggling on his couch. Jongdae wanted to say something about them being gross, but only found himself feeling a little jealous.
“I've been avoiding him for a week, it's not like we'll pick up couple rings and get together just because I explain why I was avoiding him,” Jongdae huffs. “Besides, he's still my landlord. It's too confusing.” It's an excuse, but it doesn't matter.
Snorting as he plays with Jongin's fingers, Kyungsoo looks up. “You have this great opportunity to grab him, and you're not going to take it?”
“I've said what I wanted to say, okay? If he has something to say he can do that later but right now I need movie night with two of my best friends. Are we getting the power back?”
Like an answer from Heaven, the lights turn back on, and so does the TV. “God bless the landlord,” says Jongin, taking a sip of his beer as the movie starts to play again.
-
Around three in the morning, when Jongdae has gone to sleep in his bed and Jongin and Kyungsoo are curled up on his couch, Jongdae is awoken by his phone alerting him that he has gotten a text. He groans and rubs his eyes, wondering if the text is one he can look at in the morning, then decides that he should check just to be sure.
[From: Kim Junmyeon]
[3:13 AM] I'mm outside the apartment buildign. Slightly drunk and cant remmeber door code.
[3:14 AM] Can you open up for me
Blinking slowly to comprehend the texts through his sleepy haze, Jongdae finally understands. Though he never imagined Junmyeon as someone who could get drunk. Maybe he's put his attractive landlord on a pedestal for the past months.
Deciding that it's better he goes downstairs to open up and make sure Junmyeon gets home safely rather than just buzzing the door open from upstairs, Jongdae sends off a quick text in reply saying that he'll be there in a minute before throwing on a shirt and pair of jeans. He sneaks out of the apartment silently, trying not to wake his sleeping friends, and scuttles down the stairs until he gets to the main door.
Junmyeon is squatting and leaning onto the glass door, arms crossed. It's a strange position to find him in, but Jongdae doesn't think about it too much as he opens the door and peeks at his landlord. “Hey there, hyung,” he says, wondering just how drunk the older is. “Are you going to come inside?”
Looking up at him, Junmyeon smiles, a little sloppily. “Sweet Jongdae,” he mumbles with a slight slur. “Knew I could count on you.” He slowly stands up and walks inside. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” Jongdae automatically replies, even though there was a problem in being woken up at three in the morning. Still, he doesn't find himself regretting having to help Junmyeon at all. Maybe because of all the things Junmyeon has done for him without asking for anything back.
Junmyeon stumbles at the foot of the stairs. He looks a little pale. “I'll walk with you, hyung,” says Jongdae with a gentle smile, and puts an arm around the other's waist to steady him.
They make their way up the stairs together in silence -- other than Junmyeon's occasional stumble, gasping, and Jongdae's reassurance that he's there -- and soon enough they're outside Junmyeon's apartment. Jongdae has a feeling of déjà vu, except that this time he's the other person.
Besides, Junmyeon is able to find his own key, apparently. It takes him a little while to fit it in the keyhole, but then the door opens and he enters. Deciding he'll just see him to bed -- Junmyeon has already done as much for him -- Jongdae follows, closing the door behind him.
It doesn't take long before Junmyeon emerges from the bathroom in only a pair of boxer shorts. This is the first time Jongdae has ever seen the older like this, and a soft strangled noise comes from his throat at the sight of Junmyeon's abs and bare legs. “I can't do this,” he mumbles to himself. “I can't.”
His landlord doesn't appear to hear him. “I'm going to bed now,” he announces, walking in the direction of the living room.
“Junmyeon-hyung. Hyung. That's not the right way. Come on,” Jongdae tells him, grabbing his arm to turn him around. A drunk Junmyeon is a pliant Junmyeon, it seems, and the man simply follows the younger until he is safely in his bed. He must be either exhausted or pretty drunk -- or both -- because he's almost passed out when Jongdae squeezes his hand gently.
“I'm leaving now. Goodnight, hyung,” he says and turns to leave when Junmyeon's hand grabs his arm.
When he turns back, two sleepy eyes are looking at him, threatening to close very soon. “Will you stay with me?” Junmyeon mumbles.
Really, Jongdae knows that Junmyeon is about to fall asleep and can't force him to do anything. He knows that he can leave and go back to sleep in his own apartment and start to avoid his landlord again. He also knows that if he leaves Junmyeon is likely to remember it in a bad light. He knows that if he leaves he might regret it because, really, cuddling Kim Junmyeon sounds like a great thing to do.
So he sighs, stripping off his jeans and crawling into bed next to Junmyeon. Almost immediately he's wrapped in the older's strong arms and feels him snuggling close to him. It feels nice. Safe. Jongdae finds himself imagining being wrapped in these arms more often, but tries to shake it off. “You smell nice,” Junmyeon says quietly, then sighs in content. Jongdae doesn't even try to hide his smile.
“Hey Junmyeon, why did you go drinking anyway?” he asks in curiosity.
The older whines cutely. “Couldn't stop thinking 'bout you,” he replies softly. “Didn't help. Still thought about you. Oops. Bad idea.” A short chuckle comes out of his mouth, and then he's silent for a while longer before he speaks again. “I don't want to hurt you. That's what I thought about.”
He doesn't say anything after that, just snuggles a little closer to Jongdae and seems to fall asleep. Jongdae, however, is left staring into the darkness for ages before he falls asleep, succumbing to the comfort of Junmyeon's body behind him.
-
This time around, Jongdae is awoken by a stream of sunlight pouring into the room he is sleeping in. It takes him a minute of thinking and registering the arms around him to remember the events of last night, and he presses his eyes closed, not sure if he's hoping it's only a dream. Still, it seems to be real, judging by how much Junmyeon's body against his back isn't disappearing, and he lets himself relax.
There is a soft noise, some mumbling, nuzzling at his shoulder, and Jongdae can't help the way his heart speeds up because holy shit I did not expect this when I went to bed last night. Turning his head, he is met with Junmyeon waking up, stretching and yawning. When the older stills, his eyes are open, and he stares at Jongdae. Jongdae stares back.
“Hi,” Junmyeon mumbles, blinking a few times.
“Hi,” Jongdae replies, desperately hoping that the man isn't regretting his choice in cuddling partner when he was drunk. He doesn't know what else to say, so he asks “You feeling okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Good.” There's a silence after that in which neither seem to know what to say, although Junmyeon seems to be contemplating something, gaze shifting to Jongdae's lips several times. His thoughts are revealed when he cautiously asks, “Can I kiss you?”
Jongdae stares. “W-what?” he sputters, feeling like he might fall off the bed.
Junmyeon continues with slightly fidgeting hands, and Jongdae realizes that the man is nervous, which he never knew was possible for this man. “I wanted to last night... But I didn't want you to think it was because I was drunk. I'm not drunk now, and I still want to kiss you. If it's okay with you.”
“I... Well... Did you throw up last night?” Jongdae blurts out, heart hammering in his chest. He knows what he wants.
The older seems taken aback by the question, but replies to it anyway. “A little,” he admits a little bashfully, “but I cleaned up properly and brushed my teeth, I promise.”
Biting his lower lip, Jongdae glances at Junmyeon's own soft-looking pink ones. He can't count the amount of times he's imagined even just touching those lips, whether it's been when Junmyeon has been smiling or when he has been pouting. In the end, Jongdae nods. “Okay,” he breathes. “You can kiss me.”
He swears the older's eyes light up like he never thought Jongdae would say yes, and he licks his lips nervously as the man's face comes closer to him. His heart is pounding, but when their lips touch he lets out a sigh and leans into it.
The kiss is slow and gentle, and Junmyeon's hand comes up to cup Jongdae's cheek. They both pull away after a short while, pressing their foreheads together. Jongdae can't hide his smile, and neither, it seems, can Junmyeon. “That was nice. I liked that,” says Jongdae, and the older laughs breathily.
“Me too,” he says, but he seems like he has something on his mind. “What is it?” Jongdae asks.
Junmyeon bites his lip. “What I said last night, about hurting you... I just want you to know that that's really what I think. I would never want to hurt you. I don't plan on it. And I want you to know that.”
It's not what he expected, but it's good to hear. He thinks it's just what he needed. Feeling his eyes threatening to fill with tears, Jongdae blinks a few times to keep them at bay, and nods. “Okay. Yeah. I trust you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Then I'll kiss you again. Is that okay?”
Jongdae smiles widely. “Okay.”
The kiss this time is deeper, better and slightly more hurried. Jongdae swipes his tongue over Junmyeon's lips once, then eagerly licks into his mouth, letting out a whine when the other sucks on his bottom lip.
Running his hands over Junmyeon's stomach, Jongdae grins a little. “I can touch this now,” he says, and Junmyeon laughs. “Don't laugh, you're just so hot.” Junmyeon keeps laughing, though, making Jongdae dissolve into laughter as well.
As they grow tired again, Jongdae presses a soft kiss to Junmyeon's lips and snuggles into the older's welcoming arms. They fall back asleep, waking up a couple of hours later.
“I should go down and check on the two lovebirds in my living room in case they're wondering where I am,” Jongdae mumbles, stretching and climbing out of bed.
Junmyeon whines. “Please stay. I'm still hungover, take care of me,” he pleads, stretching his arms as if trying to catch Jongdae.
“I'll be back later,” Jongdae promises with a grin as he puts on his jeans. “And then I'll take care of you all you want, hyung.” Kissing the older one more time, he sighs happily before leaving.
It still feels slightly unreal to him, how he spent the night, how he spent this morning, that apparently he is dating his landlord now? He just hopes it'll last. What if it's just a one-time thing?
When he comes back to his apartment, Jongin and Kyungsoo are having breakfast in the kitchen.
“There you are,” Jongin comments when his friend enters. “We thought it was too quiet for you to be home and assumed you wouldn't be back until later today. Did you get it on with the landlord or something? Did you text him saying you love him again and mean it?”
“We didn't get it on,” Jongdae says dryly, but then thinks of the confession and the kisses and feels his face flush slightly. “I just spent the night there.”
Kyungsoo's eyebrow lifts. “You just spent the night with him? Why are you back so early? Go back! Back!” he shoos.
“Wow, jeez, you guys are a menace,” Jongdae complains. “Get out of my apartment when you're done, I don't want you guys slobbering everywhere.”
There's a knock at the door. Jongdae opens the door to find Junmyeon standing there, looking tired and maybe a little nervous but smiling slightly anyway, and Jongdae's breath catches in his throat.
“Can I come in?” he asks, and Jongdae nods, letting him in. He bites his lip and decides to grab Junmyeon's hand with his own. Junmyeon seems to like it, interlacing their fingers and squeezing reassuringly.
“So you're the landlord. Hi,” says Jongin when Jongdae brings the older into the kitchen, Junmyeon greeting the other couple pleasantly. Jongin glances at their hands and grins a little. “Now who's being gross?”
Jongdae sticks out his tongue. “Don't talk to my boyfriend like that, idiot,” he snaps, starting to walk to the kitchen bench when he is stopped by Junmyeon stopping in his tracks. It's only then that he realizes that he called Junmyeon his boyfriend for the first time. The older looks slightly shocked, but he's smiling bashfully, a flush in his cheeks. Jongdae brightens, puling the other closer and kissing him enthusiastically. He ignores Jongin and Kyungsoo's snorts.
“They're embarrassing, sorry,” Jongdae mumbles against Junmyeon's lips.
“That's okay. I'm embarrassing too,” says Junmyeon, smiling and pressing a quick kiss to the corner of Jongdae's lips.
That's how Jongdae comes to the conclusion that Junmyeon isn't as perfect as Jongdae thought. He's embarrassing, he occasionally gets drunk when he's got too much to think about and he is nervous around people he likes, and the imperfections make Jongdae like him even better because the “perfect” Junmyeon that Jongdae used to see was too scary. Now that he knows Junmyeon better, he finds himself appreciating the older even more.
Jongdae grins. “I guess we'll be embarrassing together.”