Leaving - Chapter 1
Chapter 1:
Pusan, South Korea. 7 years later, the summer of 2010.
It was a hot day in Pusan, reminiscent of summer days in the past when Wooyoung was a different person all together. He left his house in a hurry, quickly picking up his bag in front of the door and slipping on whatever shoes were the closest. Because he was in a rush or because the house was hot, he was sweating and wiped his forehead every now and then. He pushed his hair back and put on a hat because his hair wasn’t agreeing with him.
He didn’t think of the past much or at least he tried not to. Wooyoung was 24 now and though he didn’t have a fantastic job, it had kept him busy since moving to Pusan. He finished his senior year basically alone and managed to boost his grades even higher than they already were. He graduated top of his class and instead of going to a prestigious college or traveling overseas…he ended up staying in Pusan. The endless argument between his parents began and the same in and out conversation happened:
“You’re so smart! Why aren’t you going to college?! MAKE SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF!”
“I’m not really in the mood…”
“We pushed you so hard for what?!”
“That path is not for me…”
And so Wooyoung moved out of his parent’s house in the fall and began living alone in a small apartment that costs too much anyway. He was okay though. He made enough to pay the rent. He worked at a bookstore, some famous place where tourists visited often.
Wooyoung glanced at his watch and saw he was so close to being late that he almost gave up on going in today. But something told him today was important.
Rushing down the street he ran forward with no sign of stopping, but something planned on stopping him. A man stood aloof in the center of the street. He held a map in his hands and looked around, squinting his eyes to read the signs of the buildings.
“Fucking fantastic,” Wooyoung sighed under his breath and he realized the man had seen him.
“Hey…hey!” The man waved his hands at him to get his attention. Wooyoung tried to look past him but the man had his sights set and began jogging over to Wooyoung. “Wait! Please!”
Wooyoung took a step passed him and turned around.
Oh God no.
No, no, no.
“WOOYOUNG?! OH MY GOD!” The man was familiar, too familiar. It was Nichkhun. He wore a fedora and a sweater in this heat. His smile attacked Wooyoung, especially because it seemed brighter than it had ever been. He looked older and more mature but the years hadn’t really done much because he still had an aura of youth. Besides, he was still 25. Wooyoung was speechless and even if he knew what to say, he wouldn’t be able to say it.
What does my voice sound like? Shit, I’m sweating too much. I probably smell. FUCK, what the hell am I wearing?! I hate this.
“Say something! You look good, man! It’s been….how long has it been?” Khun lightly pushed Wooyoung in the arm and he almost fell over.
“Seven years. It’s been about seven years.” Wooyoung cleared his throat.
“So…Pusan? Is this where you moved to? It’s real nice.”
“Yep…” Wooyoung stared. My God, he thought, he’s gotten more beautiful. Something made Wooyoung want to run away but each time Nichkhun inhaled, it was like he was being sucked in again. His skin looked immaculate; his hair tousled softly; his stature now above Wooyoung’s head. Were those biceps?
“So um, do you want to go get something to eat or something? I don’t know…just….catch up?”
Khun looked nervous; he fidgeted with his fingers and stuffed his map in his pocket.
“Uh…weren’t you going somewhere? I can direct you there if you’d like.”
Khun was disappointed in Wooyoung’s straight rejection and rolled his eyes.
“Alright, listen…if you didn’t want to talk to me, it’s okay. We haven’t spoken in the past seven years anyways, it won’t matter. I can last another some odd years.”
“Whoaaaa, calm down! I was just trying to be helpful.” Wooyoung laughed to try and clear the air. It’s not like you couldn’t have contacted me somehow…But instead of being nonchalant, Wooyoung got nervous at Khun’s anger and his heart dropped.
“Oh….well…I was going to this bookstore….downtown?” Khun scratched his head in embarrassment. Wooyoung took note of this and almost died at how cute of a gesture it was. Khun…embarrassed? He thought it was impossible.
So Khun showed Wooyoung the bookstore’s location on the map, and ironically…or not so ironically, it’s where Wooyoung worked. For some reason though, Wooyoung really didn’t want to work today. Wooyoung walked with Khun towards the bookstore.
“So what is it that you do now?” Wooyoung asked hesitantly. He walked at a snail’s pace.
“Is it really important? Ha…nothing too significant. After graduation I just did my own thing. I almost moved back to the states at one point.”
“Jesus Christ, really? I thought that you said you never wanted to go back.” Thank God you didn’t.
“Eh, there was nothing here in Korea that made me want to stay anymore after high school.” Wooyoung paused for a second. Did it make sense that before he had left there was something that made him stay in the country for and afterwards, there was nothing? Couldn’t be me that made him want to stay here.
“Oh…well then, what held you back”
“…ha, I don’t…know…” Wooyoung was disappointed. But then again, why would Nichkhun randomly confess his love? “Do you want to go somewhere else? I know I already asked…but maybe you’ve changed your mind?”
“I...sure.”
4:00PM, Pusan Movie Theater
The evening had been spent traveling around Pusan; the busy streets didn’t give them an easy time. There was tension and Wooyoung tried to ignore it but it wasn’t working. Any time the past would come up, Khun would become silent. He was angry and Wooyoung knew why. He had never even given him a reason as to why he left or more importantly, why he didn’t tell him.
At the same time, when exciting or funny memories would arise, Khun would lightly touch Wooyoung’s arm and laughed. His laugh was contagious, his smile contagious, hell, he was like a disease. Wooyoung was going to be sick.
They somehow ended up at a movie theater, which Wooyoung was slightly dreading because now they’d really be alone…and in the dark. They decided on a horror film. Not that it mattered because they didn’t pay attention.
Wooyoung felt 17 again, Nichkhun would drink out of this straw and when Wooyoung placed his lips on the straw he’d get butterflies. And then, Nichkhun got daring again. He moved the arm rest between Wooyoung and him and scooted closer. Every now and then he whispered something about the movie in Wooyoung’s ear, giving him goose bumps.
One time that he did this he grabbed Wooyoung’s fingers delicately. What’s with his fascination with touching me? Before moving his hand away, Wooyoung tightened his grip on Nichkhun’s hand. Nichkhun looked at him, shocked and looked back at the screen. He smiled. Wooyoung’s heart was beating nearly out of his chest. He was shocked at himself.
Nichkhun traced his thumb over Wooyoung’s hand. Wooyoung closed his eyes and felt like dying. Memories of their closeness came rushing back to him. He missed him so much that he honestly wanted to lean over and embrace Khun and tell him that he didn’t want to be alone anymore. He wanted to tell him that he was sorry. He wanted to tell him that he loved him, and hadn’t stopped, and he would never stop. Instead he sighed and looked down. Nichkhun continued this semi-torture and eventually the movie ended and though Wooyoung had wished for the torture to be over, he was saddened by the rolling of the end credits.
Nichkhun gripped Wooyoung’s hand and guided him out of the theater. He seemed angry all of a sudden.
When they finally reached the exit of the theater, Khun turned a corner and looked around aimlessly. Still pulling Wooyoung around, he didn’t even turn to look at him.
“Where can we find a hotel around here?”