Yea I had to delete that last post. . . emo much?? god, it sounded like one of my posts from freshman year... i'd rather not return to that.

I wonder if it's okay that it may never be "too late."

Lately I've had so much going on in my mind that I can't sleep anymore. I toss and turn with all these random thoughts wandering around in my head. I need to resolve them all, get them all out, but I don't know how.

i'm very frustrated with myself. why do i suck at life???

i want you SO bad and i need to make it happen and i cant because i suck at life. ughhhhh.

"I just-I just need something to happen. I need a sign that things are gonna change. I need a reason to go on. I need some hope. And in the absence of hope, I need to stay in bed and feel like I might die today."

i wish none of it ever happened ( Read more... )

I go to sleep smiling now. . .who would've thought.

I could write about it for days. I could talk about how surprised, shocked, dissapointed, confused, weirded-out and hurt I felt. Such a huge history, huge part of my life has officially come to an end, not how I thought it would and not when I thought it would. I could look back on everything, analyze every little detail or memory. I could look ( Read more... )

there's no solution. i feel stuck, torn, and confused. there's nothing to do about. i just hope that i can get better at dealing with the whole situation. i need to learn how to deal with it ( Read more... )

"I know, I know... If you try to make it more you might wreck it. . . or you might get everythng you've wanted since you were 15."