Life's changes have often made me ask myself "how strong am I really?" "Am I capable of doing what I set out to do?" Hmmmm... Wondering if I'll succeed or whether I'll fail is something I have struggled with alot the last few years. Small steps have led to the challenges and attempts of today ( Read more... )

It's a new year; new season. New beginnings to look forward to; new reasons to live ( Read more... )

People have told me I have one great story to tell. They are inspired each time I tell them of my last three years' journey. I cry as I tell them and they cry as they listen. However, it's been difficulty for me to put it all down in writing. I'd love to sit here, and been thinking for a great deal of time just how I was going to put my "story" in ( Read more... )

Is professionalism sitting at work in the back room, calling on the phone to the same unresponsive individuals each and every day, then calling all your friends to complain about how everyone is against you? Is professionalism taking your time and making your patients and coworkers wait while you finish up God-only-knows whatever business you want ( Read more... )

Sometimes, it's just difficult. It's very difficult. Tell me something else I don't want to hear. I'm not listening. So go ahead and waste the breath that's produced by your diseased infested lungs to which poisons the air around you as you exhale each word. Go ahead. I'm just a raging shadow ready to sneak behind you and sufficate the throat to ( Read more... )

It's difficult. It's challenging. Brings out both the best and the worst of you. This ain't exactly what I asked for. The opportunity to take control of my own life is something I've longed for more than anyone has longed for popcorn at the movies. However, I'm faced with some challenges ( Read more... )

Ever feel like a spider hanging for your life from a long stringy web like strain hanging from the ceiling of an unfamiliar room surrounded by an environment outside of what you're use to? Or is that just me?

Wow. It's been well over a year since I posted to this journal, and almost a year before that. Wow. So, where have I been? What have I been doing? What adventures have I taken? What fortunes or misfortunes have been upon me? Am I where I saw myself a year ago? Two years ago? Am I on the path I started and wanted to finish? Am I alone? Am I ( Read more... )

Prematurely, I hope that life circumstances get better. I have often times dreamed for more than a year now of life getting better, a better me, and a better future. However, as each month has gone by, these dreams seem just that ( Read more... )

Someone once emailed me about a week ago and said something like "Just because you can't see the sun at night doesn't mean it's not there...same with Jesus...". Lord knows what I'm thinking and feeling right now. Never had I struggled so much with the complexity of which the question "to live or not to live" brings ( Read more... )