[EXO][Fanfiction] No Fabrications Here
Title: No Fabrications Here
Character: Junmyeon
Pairing: Junmyeon/Jongdae
Rating: G
Length: 995 words
Summary: There is no need for pretenses between them because they are two halves that make a whole.
written for challenge #4 - pretending @ exoplosion
Junmyeon likes to play pretend.
He likes to pretend that he isn’t as fragile as he seems, to pretend that he’s strong enough to look after five other rambunctious boys and sit in on Skype calls in the middle of the night with management and Yifan on the other end as he listens to the never-ending list of schedules except for that one free day every few weeks or so which is so rare it is like finding a blue moon.
Junmyeon likes to pretend that he has the energy to keep a smile on his face even when there are fans closing in on all sides in the airport and he would very much like to tell them firmly to please give us some space but he can’t, and it feels like failure when Jongin gets squeezed and pushed and hurts his knee so badly that he winces and needs help as he walks, and Junmyeon swallows the anger down as much as possible because that’s one of his precious dongsaengs that is hurt, but out here, in the public eye, he is Suho, the angel, the guardian, and management has warned both him and Yifan to do nothing, say nothing, ages and ages and ages ago, to let their managers handle it, to let security do their thing, and so he bites his tongue, chokes down the bitterness of feeling like he’s not being proper hyung, a proper leader for them, when all it might take is just a few words from him, and they might actually back off.
Most of the time - ninety five percent, he thinks, is a safe bet - his smiles and enthusiasm are genuine, the interaction with the fans is real and more than he could ask for because he gets to interact with them and it is gratifying and fun to be able to see these people whom he might never have been able to meet otherwise, and when they smile back and say thank you, I love you, it fuels him and reminds him of why he chose the often hectic, almost always stressful and sometimes lonely path of being an idol.
There is five percent - maybe more, but he hopes that isn’t the truth - of uncertainty, and things unsaid and sacrifices and the disapproving looks he receives from his parents for the seven years he has spent as a trainee, the negative comments from netizens, the attitude of some of the fans and the pressure of being the leader of a group that gets to him sometimes, during those unbearably dark and cold, lonely nights where everything seems to grow in size and he thinks that it weighs more heavily than ever on his shoulders, with the worries that never really cease until daybreak, when the presence of each of his members, awake and smiling and greeting him hyung, what do you want for breakfast? ; hyung come play Mario Kart with me; hyung, come here and be my teddy bear for ten minutes; hyung, what are we doing today?; hyung, I’m taking the shower first! take a portion of his worries away and the weight is lighter, it’s manageable and he thrives on their bonds, their energy and is able to greet another day with a smile.
Sometimes, it isn’t nearly enough, and he is too tired to even muster up a small smile, until Chanyeol or Baekhyun nudges him in the ribs and pretend to whisper a joke in his ears to make him laugh, but what they’re really saying is hyung, don’t forget to smile, people are watching, and times like these he wonders if the fans see a grimace on his face instead of his usual grin.
There is however, that one person who he never has to pretend to smile for, no matter how tired or mentally exhausted he is; just having that person around is more than enough to lift his spirits, to make him feel rejuvenated again. When Jongdae is around, everything just seems so natural, everything is just so right to Junmyeon.
There is no need for pretenses between them because they are two halves that make a whole.
(With Jongdae, he never really needs to say a word, he never needs to pretend because the other boy is so in tune to his moods and personality that he might as well be able to read Junmyeon’s mind.)
It isn’t pretend when he lets Jongdae stick close to him as the taller boy chatters about what they’ve been doing in China, and what new Mandarin words and phrases he’s picked up and how much he misses Korean food and Junmyeon’s company.
It isn’t pretend when he feels Jongdae sling an arm around his shoulders and smile that Cheshire cat smile of his that Junmyeon finds both adorable and infuriating at the same time, or when their fingers brush against each other and Jongdae grabs on for a short moment, squeezing Junmyeon’s hand lightly before letting go.
For all that it seems that he isn’t paying attention to Jongdae, he is actually more aware than he ever lets on, of every word, every breath, every brush of skin that Jongdae makes in his proximity, because Junmyeon knows - and is infinitely grateful for it - that this is Jongdae’s way of offering Junmyeon the comfort, the rock-steadiness that he needs, to know that he is strong enough, more than capable enough of facing all the uncertainties and obstacles that cling to him every day.
Jongdae conveys his affection in non-verbal ways, in the little things that he knows for sure that Junmyeon will notice even if he doesn’t really show it.
He is everything that Junmyeon cannot express out loud, cannot betray, and Jongdae is more than happy to live for him, show all the things that Junmyeon cannot, and the most precious quality that Junmyeon treasures about Jongdae is that he has never, ever pretended to be who he is not.
Character: Junmyeon
Pairing: Junmyeon/Jongdae
Rating: G
Length: 995 words
Summary: There is no need for pretenses between them because they are two halves that make a whole.
written for challenge #4 - pretending @ exoplosion
Junmyeon likes to play pretend.
He likes to pretend that he isn’t as fragile as he seems, to pretend that he’s strong enough to look after five other rambunctious boys and sit in on Skype calls in the middle of the night with management and Yifan on the other end as he listens to the never-ending list of schedules except for that one free day every few weeks or so which is so rare it is like finding a blue moon.
Junmyeon likes to pretend that he has the energy to keep a smile on his face even when there are fans closing in on all sides in the airport and he would very much like to tell them firmly to please give us some space but he can’t, and it feels like failure when Jongin gets squeezed and pushed and hurts his knee so badly that he winces and needs help as he walks, and Junmyeon swallows the anger down as much as possible because that’s one of his precious dongsaengs that is hurt, but out here, in the public eye, he is Suho, the angel, the guardian, and management has warned both him and Yifan to do nothing, say nothing, ages and ages and ages ago, to let their managers handle it, to let security do their thing, and so he bites his tongue, chokes down the bitterness of feeling like he’s not being proper hyung, a proper leader for them, when all it might take is just a few words from him, and they might actually back off.
Most of the time - ninety five percent, he thinks, is a safe bet - his smiles and enthusiasm are genuine, the interaction with the fans is real and more than he could ask for because he gets to interact with them and it is gratifying and fun to be able to see these people whom he might never have been able to meet otherwise, and when they smile back and say thank you, I love you, it fuels him and reminds him of why he chose the often hectic, almost always stressful and sometimes lonely path of being an idol.
There is five percent - maybe more, but he hopes that isn’t the truth - of uncertainty, and things unsaid and sacrifices and the disapproving looks he receives from his parents for the seven years he has spent as a trainee, the negative comments from netizens, the attitude of some of the fans and the pressure of being the leader of a group that gets to him sometimes, during those unbearably dark and cold, lonely nights where everything seems to grow in size and he thinks that it weighs more heavily than ever on his shoulders, with the worries that never really cease until daybreak, when the presence of each of his members, awake and smiling and greeting him hyung, what do you want for breakfast? ; hyung come play Mario Kart with me; hyung, come here and be my teddy bear for ten minutes; hyung, what are we doing today?; hyung, I’m taking the shower first! take a portion of his worries away and the weight is lighter, it’s manageable and he thrives on their bonds, their energy and is able to greet another day with a smile.
Sometimes, it isn’t nearly enough, and he is too tired to even muster up a small smile, until Chanyeol or Baekhyun nudges him in the ribs and pretend to whisper a joke in his ears to make him laugh, but what they’re really saying is hyung, don’t forget to smile, people are watching, and times like these he wonders if the fans see a grimace on his face instead of his usual grin.
There is however, that one person who he never has to pretend to smile for, no matter how tired or mentally exhausted he is; just having that person around is more than enough to lift his spirits, to make him feel rejuvenated again. When Jongdae is around, everything just seems so natural, everything is just so right to Junmyeon.
There is no need for pretenses between them because they are two halves that make a whole.
(With Jongdae, he never really needs to say a word, he never needs to pretend because the other boy is so in tune to his moods and personality that he might as well be able to read Junmyeon’s mind.)
It isn’t pretend when he lets Jongdae stick close to him as the taller boy chatters about what they’ve been doing in China, and what new Mandarin words and phrases he’s picked up and how much he misses Korean food and Junmyeon’s company.
It isn’t pretend when he feels Jongdae sling an arm around his shoulders and smile that Cheshire cat smile of his that Junmyeon finds both adorable and infuriating at the same time, or when their fingers brush against each other and Jongdae grabs on for a short moment, squeezing Junmyeon’s hand lightly before letting go.
For all that it seems that he isn’t paying attention to Jongdae, he is actually more aware than he ever lets on, of every word, every breath, every brush of skin that Jongdae makes in his proximity, because Junmyeon knows - and is infinitely grateful for it - that this is Jongdae’s way of offering Junmyeon the comfort, the rock-steadiness that he needs, to know that he is strong enough, more than capable enough of facing all the uncertainties and obstacles that cling to him every day.
Jongdae conveys his affection in non-verbal ways, in the little things that he knows for sure that Junmyeon will notice even if he doesn’t really show it.
He is everything that Junmyeon cannot express out loud, cannot betray, and Jongdae is more than happy to live for him, show all the things that Junmyeon cannot, and the most precious quality that Junmyeon treasures about Jongdae is that he has never, ever pretended to be who he is not.