The object of power
Originally posted here
North Korea wouldn't mind teaching Sealand how to be a real country.
Sealand was used to being ignored and at this point he was almost willing to jump up and down and yell “notice me!”. Everyone still passed by without looking at him. Except the last person leaving the room, right after China, who lingered behind like she didn't want to leave after all. She was the only one there as young as him, a small beautiful Korean girl with strange purple eyes. Sweden always told him to stay away from her without explaining why.
“Do you have any advice how I can be a country?” Sealand tried.
North Korea stopped, looking at him unlike the others, considering it for a very long time.
"I know how to be a powerful country," she said. "I learned from the best. From the Soviet Union, from China and from East Germany and from Vietnam."
“Most of them aren't very powerful anymore,” Sealand said. “I want to be powerful like America and England.”
North Korea was only a little taller but she straightened her back to look down on him as condescendingly as she could.
“I can tell you how to be like America and England too.”
She decided they should have lunch together, found a Chinese buffet and made no gesture to pay until Sealand got the hint. It emptied his wallet completely and he hoped it would be worth it.
“I spend my money on toys,” North Korea said. “I think we don't need to eat to much. And this is horrible compared to even China's real food. He always makes me strange things.”
But she was still eating plate after plate and stared with suspicion at the other guests.
“I do that sometimes too,” Sealand admitted. “Last month I got a really cool game from Japan and then all my money ran out.”
“Something like that,” North Korea said.
“But now you have to tell me how to be a proper country.”
“You must be more respectful to real countries like me. It's good you bought me lunch but you should give me presents too. Nice presents. Remember that to next time.”
“Okay,” Sealand said and hoped she would get him something too. It sounded fun, like Christmas every time you had a meeting. Stupid England never told him important things like that and Latvia only told him depressing things about being a country.
"You must have a more impressive name," she said. "Principality of Sealand? You must tell everyone what a great nation you are with your name. You should be the Free People's Democratic Socialist Republic of Sealand. Something like that. It sounds more serious."
"We're a monarchy," Sealand pointed out, though he liked the idea at least.
"So am I," North Korea said. "It doesn't matter, it's only a name. You must have an impressive leader too. Someone with a legend behind him."
"My boss was awesome," Sealand said. "He was a rebel who wanted his own radio station and that jerk England stopped him. Then he got smarter and moved in with me and the rest is history."
"Your boss should have been born in a great storm, a storm calming as soon as he was born and then birds started to sing."
"We mostly have seagulls," Sealand said. "They're not good at singing."
"They turned into beautiful swallows when your boss touched them and then they sang his praise day and night from that moment on."
"Wow," Sealand said, impressed against his will. "That would have been awesome! Things like that happen in Korea?"
"Probably," North Korea said.
"Too bad they don't happen in Sealand..."
"You can change it if you like. Everyone does that. America writes histories where he is the hero who saves everyone when he's actually the imperialistic villain who tore my country apart and spreads devastation wherever he goes. But you're a small country. You have to start by changing small things."
"Thanks!" Sealand said. It was weird but he liked her. No one else had ever given him such practical advice.
***
Sealand sneaked in on another meeting to confront his new friend on her strange ideas. North Korea smiled when she saw him. She was dressed in a dark green uniform today. She looked very serious and Sealand felt a bit stupid in his outfit. Maybe that's why no one took him seriously.
"Jerk England laughed at me when I said I wanted to be named The Free People's Democratic Monarchy of Sealand," Sealand said. "I don't think your advice is that good. You're just making fun of me."
"They make fun of me too," North Korea said. "But when they're not laughing they're afraid of me and my powerful friends. If they knew me better I know they would love me. Everyone does. Otherwise it's something wrong with them and I don't like broken things.”
“I don't know if I want people to be afraid of me,” Sealand said. “A bit afraid perhaps, they shouldn't laugh.”
“That's lesson number two,” North Korea said. “You must be feared and you must be independent. If you rely on England all the time England must be a little bit afraid of you deep down, afraid of the mess you will make if he disappoints you at least.”
“He's disappointed with me all the time.”
“That's sad,” North Korea said and took Sealand's hand. Hers was surprisingly cold. “My siblings used to be nice to me when I was small. I have a lot of weapons now to make sure they're still nice. If you have money you can buy some fun missiles from me. I guarantee everyone will pay more attention to you!”
North Korea gave him a crumpled flyer from her pocket. He thanked her but was disappointed later when he tried to read it. It was written in an alphabet he couldn't understand.
***
Sealand remembered to buy North Korea a large fluffy teddy bear the next time he saw her. It had a pink bow, he heard girls liked things like that.
North Korea hugged the teddy bear.
“It's cute,” she said. “But you have to grow up some day now.”
"I think I'm older than you."
"I like cute things," North Korea continued as if he said nothing. "I like you when you're innocent and when you listen and never really understand what I'm actually telling you."
She took a step closer and kissed him on the lips, a quick peck and then she laughed.
"You'll never be powerful,” she said. “Maybe that's not the worst thing in the world. Or maybe I'll teach you to be adult. I haven't decided yet.”
Sealand wondered if this was like having a girlfriend. Girls were complicated and they always tried to keep secrets from you.
****
"You still want to see me," North Korea said. She was still so very thin, even after eating all of Sealand's candy all the time.
"You still haven't told me how to be a powerful real country," Sealand said. "And you always refuse to play with me. Is that a part of the secret?"
North Korea put her slender hand on Sealand's arm. In her other hand she still had the teddy bear. It was expensive, Sealand was glad she liked it.
"Yes," she said. "China has his cat dolls and I have my own fluffy toys but we have another side too. If you don't learn about that side you'll never be a real country. Maybe I should invite you to play with me. I can teach you a lot of new games. My kind of games."
“I promised Sweden to not run off to strange places alone.”
“You won't be alone, you'll be with me. I never had a nation in my own age to play with... And you're almost a real nation.”
“I can't right now,” Sealand said. The hungry look in her eyes started to make him nervous.
“You're rude and you forgot to bring a present too,” North Korea said. “I don't like that. There must be something wrong with you to forget important things like that.”
“Hey,” Sealand protested. “You eat so much all the time and I spend almost all my allowance on you. Maybe I don't want to hang out with you if you are going to be like that.”
“I didn't ask,” North Korea said. Her grip on his wrist tightened. Suddenly Sealand realized just because she was a girl he wasn't stronger than her. “But don't worry, I fix whatever's wrong with you. I'm good at things like that.”
“Let go of me!” Sealand yelled. Where was everyone? Why did he always agree to see her at secluded spots after world meetings? He hoped she would kiss him again, not act like a freak.
“If you come with North Korea you'll go home when North Korea wants you to,” she said. “I'm not the kind of country Sweden is.”
“No, you're stupid!” Sealand said. “And you're hurting me!”
“And you'll never be a real country if you're that weak,” North Korea said. “I was hurt all the time when I was younger and now I'm a real country. I think you'll be stronger too if I hurt you a bit. That's the secret."
“W-what?” Sealand started, paling even more.
“Let go of Sealand,” England said.
The two young nations had been completely focused on each other, England appeared like out of nowhere. North Korea stared at him with open hate, a terrifying expression that made Sealand try to shy away from her again.
“What if I don't?”
“Don't push your luck,” England warned. His giant stupid eyebrows narrowed.
“Fine!” North Korea said. “I don't need stupid ugly friends like you anyway. I have better friends who gives me nicer things!”
She let go of Sealand, pushing him away before she threw the teddy bear at him.
“Jerk!” she screamed and scuttled away.
“W-why did she do that?” Sealand said, looking pleadingly at England and forgetting he was a jerk too for a moment.
“Didn't Sweden teach you to not accept candy from rogue states?” England said.
“She ate my candy,” Sealand mumbled. He didn't know much about North Korean culture, maybe he accidentally insulted her somehow? “Jerk England, she isn't going to want to be my friend now...”
England patted Sealand's hair, with more affection than usual.
“Go home and talk to Sweden about this,” he said. “I think he and Finland can explain it better.”
Sealand wasn't sure he wanted to know. A bruise started to form on his wrist and he felt sad and confused, not stronger.
North Korea wouldn't mind teaching Sealand how to be a real country.
Sealand was used to being ignored and at this point he was almost willing to jump up and down and yell “notice me!”. Everyone still passed by without looking at him. Except the last person leaving the room, right after China, who lingered behind like she didn't want to leave after all. She was the only one there as young as him, a small beautiful Korean girl with strange purple eyes. Sweden always told him to stay away from her without explaining why.
“Do you have any advice how I can be a country?” Sealand tried.
North Korea stopped, looking at him unlike the others, considering it for a very long time.
"I know how to be a powerful country," she said. "I learned from the best. From the Soviet Union, from China and from East Germany and from Vietnam."
“Most of them aren't very powerful anymore,” Sealand said. “I want to be powerful like America and England.”
North Korea was only a little taller but she straightened her back to look down on him as condescendingly as she could.
“I can tell you how to be like America and England too.”
She decided they should have lunch together, found a Chinese buffet and made no gesture to pay until Sealand got the hint. It emptied his wallet completely and he hoped it would be worth it.
“I spend my money on toys,” North Korea said. “I think we don't need to eat to much. And this is horrible compared to even China's real food. He always makes me strange things.”
But she was still eating plate after plate and stared with suspicion at the other guests.
“I do that sometimes too,” Sealand admitted. “Last month I got a really cool game from Japan and then all my money ran out.”
“Something like that,” North Korea said.
“But now you have to tell me how to be a proper country.”
“You must be more respectful to real countries like me. It's good you bought me lunch but you should give me presents too. Nice presents. Remember that to next time.”
“Okay,” Sealand said and hoped she would get him something too. It sounded fun, like Christmas every time you had a meeting. Stupid England never told him important things like that and Latvia only told him depressing things about being a country.
"You must have a more impressive name," she said. "Principality of Sealand? You must tell everyone what a great nation you are with your name. You should be the Free People's Democratic Socialist Republic of Sealand. Something like that. It sounds more serious."
"We're a monarchy," Sealand pointed out, though he liked the idea at least.
"So am I," North Korea said. "It doesn't matter, it's only a name. You must have an impressive leader too. Someone with a legend behind him."
"My boss was awesome," Sealand said. "He was a rebel who wanted his own radio station and that jerk England stopped him. Then he got smarter and moved in with me and the rest is history."
"Your boss should have been born in a great storm, a storm calming as soon as he was born and then birds started to sing."
"We mostly have seagulls," Sealand said. "They're not good at singing."
"They turned into beautiful swallows when your boss touched them and then they sang his praise day and night from that moment on."
"Wow," Sealand said, impressed against his will. "That would have been awesome! Things like that happen in Korea?"
"Probably," North Korea said.
"Too bad they don't happen in Sealand..."
"You can change it if you like. Everyone does that. America writes histories where he is the hero who saves everyone when he's actually the imperialistic villain who tore my country apart and spreads devastation wherever he goes. But you're a small country. You have to start by changing small things."
"Thanks!" Sealand said. It was weird but he liked her. No one else had ever given him such practical advice.
***
Sealand sneaked in on another meeting to confront his new friend on her strange ideas. North Korea smiled when she saw him. She was dressed in a dark green uniform today. She looked very serious and Sealand felt a bit stupid in his outfit. Maybe that's why no one took him seriously.
"Jerk England laughed at me when I said I wanted to be named The Free People's Democratic Monarchy of Sealand," Sealand said. "I don't think your advice is that good. You're just making fun of me."
"They make fun of me too," North Korea said. "But when they're not laughing they're afraid of me and my powerful friends. If they knew me better I know they would love me. Everyone does. Otherwise it's something wrong with them and I don't like broken things.”
“I don't know if I want people to be afraid of me,” Sealand said. “A bit afraid perhaps, they shouldn't laugh.”
“That's lesson number two,” North Korea said. “You must be feared and you must be independent. If you rely on England all the time England must be a little bit afraid of you deep down, afraid of the mess you will make if he disappoints you at least.”
“He's disappointed with me all the time.”
“That's sad,” North Korea said and took Sealand's hand. Hers was surprisingly cold. “My siblings used to be nice to me when I was small. I have a lot of weapons now to make sure they're still nice. If you have money you can buy some fun missiles from me. I guarantee everyone will pay more attention to you!”
North Korea gave him a crumpled flyer from her pocket. He thanked her but was disappointed later when he tried to read it. It was written in an alphabet he couldn't understand.
***
Sealand remembered to buy North Korea a large fluffy teddy bear the next time he saw her. It had a pink bow, he heard girls liked things like that.
North Korea hugged the teddy bear.
“It's cute,” she said. “But you have to grow up some day now.”
"I think I'm older than you."
"I like cute things," North Korea continued as if he said nothing. "I like you when you're innocent and when you listen and never really understand what I'm actually telling you."
She took a step closer and kissed him on the lips, a quick peck and then she laughed.
"You'll never be powerful,” she said. “Maybe that's not the worst thing in the world. Or maybe I'll teach you to be adult. I haven't decided yet.”
Sealand wondered if this was like having a girlfriend. Girls were complicated and they always tried to keep secrets from you.
****
"You still want to see me," North Korea said. She was still so very thin, even after eating all of Sealand's candy all the time.
"You still haven't told me how to be a powerful real country," Sealand said. "And you always refuse to play with me. Is that a part of the secret?"
North Korea put her slender hand on Sealand's arm. In her other hand she still had the teddy bear. It was expensive, Sealand was glad she liked it.
"Yes," she said. "China has his cat dolls and I have my own fluffy toys but we have another side too. If you don't learn about that side you'll never be a real country. Maybe I should invite you to play with me. I can teach you a lot of new games. My kind of games."
“I promised Sweden to not run off to strange places alone.”
“You won't be alone, you'll be with me. I never had a nation in my own age to play with... And you're almost a real nation.”
“I can't right now,” Sealand said. The hungry look in her eyes started to make him nervous.
“You're rude and you forgot to bring a present too,” North Korea said. “I don't like that. There must be something wrong with you to forget important things like that.”
“Hey,” Sealand protested. “You eat so much all the time and I spend almost all my allowance on you. Maybe I don't want to hang out with you if you are going to be like that.”
“I didn't ask,” North Korea said. Her grip on his wrist tightened. Suddenly Sealand realized just because she was a girl he wasn't stronger than her. “But don't worry, I fix whatever's wrong with you. I'm good at things like that.”
“Let go of me!” Sealand yelled. Where was everyone? Why did he always agree to see her at secluded spots after world meetings? He hoped she would kiss him again, not act like a freak.
“If you come with North Korea you'll go home when North Korea wants you to,” she said. “I'm not the kind of country Sweden is.”
“No, you're stupid!” Sealand said. “And you're hurting me!”
“And you'll never be a real country if you're that weak,” North Korea said. “I was hurt all the time when I was younger and now I'm a real country. I think you'll be stronger too if I hurt you a bit. That's the secret."
“W-what?” Sealand started, paling even more.
“Let go of Sealand,” England said.
The two young nations had been completely focused on each other, England appeared like out of nowhere. North Korea stared at him with open hate, a terrifying expression that made Sealand try to shy away from her again.
“What if I don't?”
“Don't push your luck,” England warned. His giant stupid eyebrows narrowed.
“Fine!” North Korea said. “I don't need stupid ugly friends like you anyway. I have better friends who gives me nicer things!”
She let go of Sealand, pushing him away before she threw the teddy bear at him.
“Jerk!” she screamed and scuttled away.
“W-why did she do that?” Sealand said, looking pleadingly at England and forgetting he was a jerk too for a moment.
“Didn't Sweden teach you to not accept candy from rogue states?” England said.
“She ate my candy,” Sealand mumbled. He didn't know much about North Korean culture, maybe he accidentally insulted her somehow? “Jerk England, she isn't going to want to be my friend now...”
England patted Sealand's hair, with more affection than usual.
“Go home and talk to Sweden about this,” he said. “I think he and Finland can explain it better.”
Sealand wasn't sure he wanted to know. A bruise started to form on his wrist and he felt sad and confused, not stronger.