AU SPN RPF: Sexile (and Other Hazards of Dorm Life) - Jared/Jensen (PG-13)
Title: Sexile (and Other Hazards of Dorm Life)
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Word Count: ~4,200
Summary: College AU. Jensen really wishes he'd stop making a fool of himself in front of the hot guy who sleeps in the common room.
A/N: For abx_journal for spn_j2_xmas; I'm sorry I didn't go with your prompts, but I hope you enjoy it! Thanks very much to switch842 for the beta, and to sgflutegirl for listening to me babble about the title.
ETA: Now also available as a podfic read by the lovely cee_m.
Jensen's first weekend back at school is an exercise in bad decisions. This isn't anything new, really, but it's his last first weekend back, an occasion his friends think is something worthy of an unusual level of alcohol-fueled celebration. Which is how Jensen ends up drunkenly making his way across campus and back to his room, cursing the circumstances that led to him being the only senior on the top floor of a mostly-freshmen dorm with no fucking elevator. So what if it's a single covered by his scholarship - stairs are evil. Clearly he should've just paid up the ridiculous rent for an off campus apartment to avoid situations like this.
His coordination's pretty shot - it's always the first thing to go when he drinks, which often leaves him bumping into walls and furniture even when he's only barely buzzed. Tonight's no different, and it's making the endless stairs up to his floor really damned unbearable as he stumbles up them, hanging on the railing like it's a lifeline. Each step is way harder than it should be, and by the time he makes it to the third floor, he's ready to give up and drop where he stands.
But there's a common room between him and his next staircase, and it's dark and quiet, and Jensen thinks about maybe just taking a break on one of the couches for a few minutes before braving the last two flights. He goes to gratefully take a seat, but before he can actually flop down on the cushions, there's an alarmed yelp from behind him. Jensen scrambles away and turns to see a guy sit up right where he almost plopped down.
"Dude, watch where you're sitting," the guy says, and even in the darkness, Jensen can tell he's glaring a little.
"I didn't see you there; it's dark. I'm sorry."
"Just be more careful, okay?"
"I will." He eyes the couch longingly. "Can I sit now?" Jensen's not surprised when he sounds amazingly pathetic.
"Yeah, I guess so," the guy answers and swings his feet onto the floor so Jensen can take a seat. "So, why the urgent need for a couch?"
"Living on the fifth floor is torture. This many stairs is cruel and unusual punishment for…something."
The guy laughs a bit. "You're completely trashed, aren't you?"
"I'm not that bad. Just get clumsy when I drink."
"Uh-huh. You gonna be all right to get up to your room? Or do you need help?"
Jensen thinks about it for a minute. Stairs are definitely not his friend at the moment, but he's also sure that having a complete stranger haul his drunken ass around would be a new kind of humiliating low in his life. He's about to say no when the guy cuts him off, saying, "Screw it, if it's taking you that long to decide, you definitely need a hand. C'mon."
Then the guy puts an arm around him and lifts him up off the couch, and wow. The guy's pressed closed against Jensen's side, and even through two sets of clothes, Jensen can tell that he's got some serious muscles. He still can't really see the guy's face, not when the only light around is the distant glow of the emergency exit signs, but if the guy's body is any indication of what the rest of him is like, Jensen's halfway to in love already. Luckily, he's never been a talkative drunk, and he keeps that thought to himself.
Being nearly dragged up the stairs is awkward on a lot of levels, and with all his concentration on not tripping, there isn't much opportunity to do any covert lusting over his newfound helper. But two flights of stairs and one too-long hallway later, they're outside Jensen's room, and the guy pulls away, which makes Jensen want to protest, even if he'd rather have at least a little bit of dignity left in the morning. But he digs his keys out of his jeans pocket instead, and before he can even try opening the door, the guy grabs the key from his hand to do it himself.
The guy flips the lights on and leads Jensen in, and fucking finally, Jensen gets a good look at him. His previous assessment of the guy's attractiveness is nothing to what he can see now, because this guy just might be the hottest person Jensen's ever actually seen. He's insanely tall and built, and has longish brown hair that falls into his eyes. Instead of annoyance, he's got a kind of amused half-smile that hints at some awesome dimples.
Jensen's thoughts are just turning to deciding which bit of skin he'd like to lick first when the guy interrupts, "So, I should let you go to sleep. Are you gonna be okay for the night?"
Somewhat disappointed, Jensen says, "Yeah, I guess."
"You've got water? And Advil or something?"
"Yes."
"All right, I'm gonna go then. Just don’t, like…drown in your own vomit or anything, okay?" The guy heads back for the hallway, hits the lights off, and says, "Good night," as he shuts the door.
Jensen flops down face-first onto his bed, and he's out within minutes.
* * * * *
Jensen manages to go a whole two weeks without making an idiot of himself like that again.
It's early for a Friday night, the second week of classes is behind him, and he's already drunk enough to be heading to bed. The stairs aren't any better this time, but they've become just another fact of life at this point. As Jensen passes through the third floor again, he thinks about taking a break - definitely checking the couch before he sits this time - but the guy's there again, asleep. His eyes are shut tightly and he's curled up into a ball under a blanket and with a pillow like he'd actually planned to spend the night on the sofa.
The guy is still just as attractive as Jensen thought before, though he looks, well, kind of adorable and insanely vulnerable the way he's sleeping, all curled in on himself. Jensen thinks about maybe trying touching him, just a little something innocent; the guy is good looking enough to risk a punch in the face if it doesn't work out. But then Jensen remembers how creepy that would be, and how staring at someone sleeping isn't much better, so instead he says, "Hey." The guy lets out a quiet little snore. "Hey." He pokes the guy in the thigh. "Wake up."
"Huh?" The guy blinks sleepily at Jensen, sits up, and then groans. "You again."
"Yes. And you're here again."
"Well, obviously. Is there a reason you woke me up?"
"You shouldn't fall asleep in the common room, y'know. Somebody'll draw on you."
"Draw on me?"
"That's what they always do to people who pass out places, right? Draw dicks on their faces with permanent markers."
"Okay, first, I didn't pass out; I'm nowhere near as drunk as you. Two, that wouldn't be that big a deal." He snorts. "I'm kinda used to having dick near my face."
"...What?"
"It was a joke. Not a very funny one. 'Cause I'm gay," the guy says.
"Oh. I'm Jensen."
The guy laughs and holds out his hand. "Jared." Jared - in his drunken state, Jensen thinks that’s a great name, and Jared is gay and also incredibly good looking, and he's shaking Jensen's hand. It might be the best night ever. Jared asks, "So was there a reason you woke me up? Besides worrying about the state of my face, I mean."
"Not really. Why're you sleeping in the common room?"
"Sexiled."
"That sucks."
"At least the couch is almost comfortable."
"No, it's not. It's an invention of Satan sent here to make us all miserable."
Jared shrugs. "I can sleep just about anywhere, so it doesn't really bother me. So, you gonna need me to drag you up to your room again?"
Jensen's pretty sure he goes red at how embarrassing the memory of last time is, and he shakes his head. "I'll be fine."
"If you're sure."
"I'll let you get back to sleep."
"Good night, Jensen."
"Good night," he replies as he heads for the stairs.
Jensen does make it to his room by himself, thankfully, and it isn't until he's suffering through a hangover the next morning that he realizes just how stupid he must've sounded the previous night. Being a drunken fool in front of a hot guy one time, that's bad. Doing it more than once, that's just a thousand times worse. Because this Jared guy is exactly his type, and amazingly enough is also gay, and if Jensen had been sober when they'd met, he would've asked Jared out immediately. But now Jensen's made one of the worst first impressions ever - the only way it could've been more horrible would be if he'd thrown up - and he's pretty sure there's little chance he can convince Jared that he's not that much of an idiot.
Even so, when he gets back from lunch in the cafeteria, he takes a few minutes to wander the third floor, planning out a dozen witty-sounding apologies for his behavior while he searches the nametags on the doors for any Jared. There's only one, and Jensen's about to knock, but that's when he notices there's a stolen Holiday Inn do not disturb sign on the handle, so he turns and continues on to his room, still mentally kicking himself.
* * * * *
It isn't until a Tuesday afternoon in early October that he sees Jared in the common room again, and this time he's completely and mercifully sober. Jared's bent over the battered table, thumbing through a hefty-looking textbook, tapping a highlighter against his thigh as he reads.
Before he can talk himself out of it, Jensen says, "Hey."
Jared looks up from his book. "Oh, it's you. Jensen, right?"
"Yeah. And you're Jared."
"Good to finally meet you when you're not drunk."
Jensen smiles self-deprecatingly and rubs at the back of his neck. "I never thanked you for putting up with me, did I?"
"Hey, it's no problem. I've dealt with a lot worse."
That isn't exactly a ringing endorsement, and Jensen cringes. "Really, man, I'm sorry. I'm not usually like that. I just have friends who like to ply me with alcohol way more often than I'd like."
"I know what you mean. Chad, my roommate? He thinks that it's a crime not to party Thursday through Sunday. He's always trying to drag me along and make me do shit that's kind of stupid."
"You said last time you were out here because he'd kicked you out of the room?"
"Yeah…he brings girls back a lot. He's kind of the biggest manwhore on campus."
"So you get stuck out here pretty regularly."
"Well, you expect it, right? Nightmare roommate, the first rite of passage for a college freshman."
"That's no excuse for him being an asshole."
"He's not really, not most of the time. We usually get along pretty well. He's not a bad guy. Really."
"You don't have a guy to bring back to the room, give him a taste of his own medicine, maybe?"
"Ugh, you remembered that? That's probably the stupidest way I've ever come out to someone." Jared laughs, and it's the most incredible thing Jensen thinks he's ever seen, the way Jared's face lights with it. It makes Jensen's stomach seem like it's doing gymnastics, makes him feel like he's a pre-teen with his first crush. He wants to see Jared laugh again, to make him happy like that again, and that, more than anything else, is a sign of just how far gone Jensen already is.
"So…" Jensen asks carefully, "…boyfriend? Any opportunities to lock Chad out?"
"No, not seeing anybody right now. And not really looking for anything either. Getting used to this college thing is hard enough without worrying about hookups."
And just like that, Jensen's last small spark of hope dies a sad and lonely death, because there's no point in even trying to ask Jared out now, not when he's made it clear he's not interested in anyone, let alone Jensen. "Yeah, I can understand that," he says, trying not to let his disappointment show. "Too bad your roommate doesn't see it that way."
"You don't know how much I wish."
"I think I can imagine. Makes me even more glad I've got a single."
"Lucky bastard. So, you're an upperclassman, then?"
"Senior, actually."
"You haven't taken Intro Biology, have you? 'Cause I've got a test on Thursday and I'm ready to throw this friggin' book out a window."
"You're in luck. I'm a bio major, actually. What're you having trouble with?"
Jared snorts. "Everything? Take a seat, man; this might take a while. I hope you've got time."
"I've got a coupla hours until my next class." Jensen pulls out a chair and sits. "Let's get started."
* * * * *
So he and Jared become friends, of a sort. Now that he knows how messed up Jared's living situation is, Jensen notices just how much time Jared spends in the common room. He studies there, fools around on his computer there, sleeps on the couch there more weekends than not. Jared eats and folds his laundry and writes papers at the common room table. The only time that's ever consistently safe for him to be in his room seems to be the late morning, between when Chad leaves for breakfast and returns. Jensen's heard - and lived - his share of bad roommate stories, but Jared's is probably the most ridiculous he's seen, and Jared's way too nice and likes the guy too much to ever make a big deal about it.
The only plus side to all this is that they usually end up hanging out whenever Jared's sexiled, and Jensen's kind of amazed at how well they click. It's easy, talking with Jared, joking around and getting to know each other and awkwardly gaping at how damned loud Chad is whenever he brings a girl back to the dorm. Jared's got a wacky, upbeat sense of humor that seems to involve a lot of flailing around weirdly, and while Jensen usually has no patience for such hyperactivity, with Jared it just works. He can put up with Jensen's sarcasm like no one else, and can actually pull Jensen out of his foulest temper with just a few words. They fit together like no friendship Jensen's had before.
So Jensen's warm and fuzzy feelings don't go away; in fact, they get worse. They're friends, and really, that's great, but it isn't enough, not by far, and Jensen isn't above daydreaming about an elusive someday when Jared might realize he's madly in love with Jensen, declare said love, and then drag Jensen off somewhere for happily-ever-after marathon sex. Jensen's quite painfully aware of how ridiculously besotted he is, thanks very much. Hell, he doesn't even mind how much his friends tease him for having a thing for a freshman.
It's a Thursday in mid-November, and Jensen is trudging up the stairs on his way back from class, pathetically trying to fool himself into believing that he's not hoping to run into Jared as he passes through the third floor. Which means he's completely preoccupied and doesn't watch where he's going until he almost runs smack into Jared near the top of the stairs.
Jared, who is apparently wearing nothing but a towel held tightly around his waist. His hair is wet, plastered against his head oddly and dripping water in slow trails down his chest. His chest, which is bare and wet and holy fuck, Jared's abs have to be the most amazing ones in all of existence. And then there's the towel, which Jensen can't forget about, because it's damned obvious that there's nothing under there, that it's only an easily dropped layer of terrycloth between Jensen and a completely naked Jared.
But then Jensen notices Jared's expression, and all those lustful thoughts aren't important anymore, because Jared should never look like this: a little annoyed and a lot embarrassed. "Hey, you okay?" Jensen asks.
"Chad was out and I went to grab a shower, and then I came back and…" Jared trails off and gestures towards the door where that damned hotel do not disturb sign is hanging again.
"Fucking hell. How long have you been stuck out here?"
"Like ten minutes so far. D'you think I could maybe wait in your room until he's finished? Standing out here in a towel really, really sucks."
"Of course."
They head up to Jensen's room, and once they're inside, Jensen rifles through his dresser for his loosest pair of boxers and a tee shirt, tossing them to Jared. "Here. So you don't have to hang onto that towel for dear life."
"Thanks, man."
Jensen turns to face the wall, and those dirty thoughts are back in a rush. He hears the towel drop to the floor, the soft sound of fabric moving as Jared pulls on the boxers and then the shirt, and Jensen desperately tries not to picture exactly what's going on behind him, how Jared must look.
"'K," Jared says when he's done, and Jensen can look again, and what he sees makes it difficult to breathe. It's worse than in the hallway now, because Jared's still wet and gorgeous, but now he's wearing Jensen's clothes, and it sends a guilty little thrill through Jensen to wonder if this is what he might look like the morning after. Jared doesn't seem to notice how Jensen's practically drooling, though, and he says, "Really, thanks again."
"Not a problem," Jensen mumbles.
"I'm gonna have to talk to him about this sometime, aren't I?"
"You should've done it months ago, Jared."
"It's just, I'm not a confrontational kind of guy. What'm I supposed to do, tell him to have less sex?" That expression's back, the one that brings all these absurd protective feelings bubbling up inside Jensen, and something just snaps.
"You know what? Enough of this shit. You wait here."
Before Jared can say anything, Jensen marches out of the room, down to the third floor, and to Jared's door. Chad's at the loud stage of things again, his moaning clearly audible even in the hallway, but Jensen doesn't pay attention to the noise or that stupid fucking sign. Instead, he bangs on the door, not letting up until the door is yanked open, revealing a very irate looking Chad wrapped in a sheet. Over Chad's shoulder, he can see a blonde girl mostly hiding under a blanket.
"What the fuck do you want?"
Loudly and with an evil grin, Jensen says, "Oh, I didn't realize you were with somebody. I guess that means your rash cleared up?" The girl gasps and Chad sputters, but Jensen keeps on smiling.
"Who are you?"
"Friend of Jared's. And you see, he really needs to get in the room right now, so it'd be great if you'd wrap this up in the next five minutes so he can get his stuff. And if you don't, I'll kick your ass." Jensen turns and heads back for the stairs. He calls over his shoulder, "Really. You've got five minutes."
When he comes downstairs again, this time with Jared in tow, there's no sign of Chad. Jared thanks him profusely, promises to have Jensen's clothes washed and back soon, but Jensen waves it off. Jared can thank him when he's got a more permanent solution to this problem. And Jensen might just have an answer.
* * * * *
In the end, it doesn't take much, just a few words to the sympathetic janitor, and a twenty dollar bill slipped to a teenage employee at the nearest hardware store. And then comes the part that's actually hard, the telling Jared part. Because maybe he'll think it's stupid, or too much and too close, or maybe he'll laugh it off like some kind of joke. And maybe Jared will realize what Jensen's really saying - he's so gone over Jared that he's stooping to sappy, almost-romantic gestures.
It's almost time for finals, and Jared's spending most of his time at the table, hunched over his class notes, and that's where Jensen goes when things are set, when he's ready to spring his surprise.
"Hey," Jared says when Jensen walks into the common room. He grins, and Jensen's heart pounds a little faster because he knows that smile is just for him, just because he came into the room.
"How's the studying going?"
"It's not too late to join a circus or something, right?"
"Yeah, you'd rock the trapeze. All that spandex and sequins? Totally you."
"Screw you."
"Right back at you." Jensen looks away, unable to really look at Jared as he starts, "So…there's something I wanna show you."
"Sure. What's up?"
"Just come upstairs."
Jensen heads back to his room, and Jared follows close behind. They get to the door, and Jensen has to pause and nervously wipe his hands on his jeans before he pushes it open and motions for Jared to go inside. Jared does, and he notices the changes to the room immediately.
"Why's there another bed in here?"
"Um, well, I was talking to Bob the other day, and he mentioned there were a couple of extra beds in the storage room downstairs, said it'd be okay if I took one. I thought maybe you should have something better than the couch to sleep on next time Chad does his thing. And I, uh, might've bribed a kid at Home Depot to make a copy of my room key. So you can let yourself in when I'm not around. If you need to." Jensen holds out the key even though he still can't look Jared in the eye.
"Oh, wow, Jensen..." Jared takes the key, looking at it with awe, like it's something incredibly marvelous.
Then Jared's leaning closer, bringing his hand up to cup Jensen's face, and Jensen's heart is thundering because he's sure this can't be happening. But then it does - Jared kisses him, warm and soft and wonderful, and Jensen kisses back, tentatively, with a desperate hope that his eagerness doesn't show. Because this - him and Jared - is exactly what he's spent a whole semester wanting and now he has it, maybe. He needs to know what this means, needs to be sure they're on the same page, but he can't pull back, not when he still doesn't know if he's got this for good.
But Jared does break the kiss, eventually, leaving Jensen a little breathless and dazed. He says, "So, I might've wanted to do that for a while now. I'm thinking you don't mind."
"Only that it took you so long," Jensen blurts.
Jared laughs and kisses him again, short and chaste this time. "You like me."
"I can't stand you."
"No you don't. You're letting me share your room. You got me a bed."
"No, I stole you a bed. Totally different."
"Completely." Jared smiles, but it can't mask the sudden unsure look in his eyes. "So, are we...?"
"I was kind of hoping you'd go out with me sometime. Gotta make sure you're a decent date before I go committing myself. Don't want a boyfriend who's a lousy date."
And just like that, Jared grins full-force, says, "Ha, just you wait. I'm gonna knock your socks off."
"Knock my socks off? Who the fuck even says that?"
"Keep talking like that and you're never getting laid."
"Okay, okay. Not talking anymore."
There are much better things to do with his mouth, anyway.
* * * * *
Jensen's on his way back in from his first final when he notices that Jared and Chad's door sits open for the first time all semester. Jared is sorting through his closet, haphazardly tossing clothes into a duffle on the floor when Jensen comes in, but he stops and grins when he notices Jensen standing at the doorway.
"So, Chad strike out?" Jensen asks. "Did he finally get slapped by every girl on campus?"
"Ha! No, he actually went to his final. Don't know how he's gonna pass considering he didn't go to a single class, but whatever. Figured it'd be a good time to move some of my stuff up to your room so I'm not stuck without clothes again. I mean, if it's okay with you."
"More than," Jensen answers, and leans up for a kiss, one just firm enough to promise more coming soon. He pulls back quickly, though, and says, "Hey, I got an idea. When's Chad gonna be back?"
"Uh, twenty minutes, maybe?"
"Where's that do not disturb sign?"
It takes Jared a fraction of a second to get what Jensen's planning, but when he does, a slow, mischievous smile spreads across his face. He grabs the sign from Chad's dresser, hangs it on the handle, and shuts the door. "Let's see how loud we can get."
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Word Count: ~4,200
Summary: College AU. Jensen really wishes he'd stop making a fool of himself in front of the hot guy who sleeps in the common room.
A/N: For abx_journal for spn_j2_xmas; I'm sorry I didn't go with your prompts, but I hope you enjoy it! Thanks very much to switch842 for the beta, and to sgflutegirl for listening to me babble about the title.
ETA: Now also available as a podfic read by the lovely cee_m.
Jensen's first weekend back at school is an exercise in bad decisions. This isn't anything new, really, but it's his last first weekend back, an occasion his friends think is something worthy of an unusual level of alcohol-fueled celebration. Which is how Jensen ends up drunkenly making his way across campus and back to his room, cursing the circumstances that led to him being the only senior on the top floor of a mostly-freshmen dorm with no fucking elevator. So what if it's a single covered by his scholarship - stairs are evil. Clearly he should've just paid up the ridiculous rent for an off campus apartment to avoid situations like this.
His coordination's pretty shot - it's always the first thing to go when he drinks, which often leaves him bumping into walls and furniture even when he's only barely buzzed. Tonight's no different, and it's making the endless stairs up to his floor really damned unbearable as he stumbles up them, hanging on the railing like it's a lifeline. Each step is way harder than it should be, and by the time he makes it to the third floor, he's ready to give up and drop where he stands.
But there's a common room between him and his next staircase, and it's dark and quiet, and Jensen thinks about maybe just taking a break on one of the couches for a few minutes before braving the last two flights. He goes to gratefully take a seat, but before he can actually flop down on the cushions, there's an alarmed yelp from behind him. Jensen scrambles away and turns to see a guy sit up right where he almost plopped down.
"Dude, watch where you're sitting," the guy says, and even in the darkness, Jensen can tell he's glaring a little.
"I didn't see you there; it's dark. I'm sorry."
"Just be more careful, okay?"
"I will." He eyes the couch longingly. "Can I sit now?" Jensen's not surprised when he sounds amazingly pathetic.
"Yeah, I guess so," the guy answers and swings his feet onto the floor so Jensen can take a seat. "So, why the urgent need for a couch?"
"Living on the fifth floor is torture. This many stairs is cruel and unusual punishment for…something."
The guy laughs a bit. "You're completely trashed, aren't you?"
"I'm not that bad. Just get clumsy when I drink."
"Uh-huh. You gonna be all right to get up to your room? Or do you need help?"
Jensen thinks about it for a minute. Stairs are definitely not his friend at the moment, but he's also sure that having a complete stranger haul his drunken ass around would be a new kind of humiliating low in his life. He's about to say no when the guy cuts him off, saying, "Screw it, if it's taking you that long to decide, you definitely need a hand. C'mon."
Then the guy puts an arm around him and lifts him up off the couch, and wow. The guy's pressed closed against Jensen's side, and even through two sets of clothes, Jensen can tell that he's got some serious muscles. He still can't really see the guy's face, not when the only light around is the distant glow of the emergency exit signs, but if the guy's body is any indication of what the rest of him is like, Jensen's halfway to in love already. Luckily, he's never been a talkative drunk, and he keeps that thought to himself.
Being nearly dragged up the stairs is awkward on a lot of levels, and with all his concentration on not tripping, there isn't much opportunity to do any covert lusting over his newfound helper. But two flights of stairs and one too-long hallway later, they're outside Jensen's room, and the guy pulls away, which makes Jensen want to protest, even if he'd rather have at least a little bit of dignity left in the morning. But he digs his keys out of his jeans pocket instead, and before he can even try opening the door, the guy grabs the key from his hand to do it himself.
The guy flips the lights on and leads Jensen in, and fucking finally, Jensen gets a good look at him. His previous assessment of the guy's attractiveness is nothing to what he can see now, because this guy just might be the hottest person Jensen's ever actually seen. He's insanely tall and built, and has longish brown hair that falls into his eyes. Instead of annoyance, he's got a kind of amused half-smile that hints at some awesome dimples.
Jensen's thoughts are just turning to deciding which bit of skin he'd like to lick first when the guy interrupts, "So, I should let you go to sleep. Are you gonna be okay for the night?"
Somewhat disappointed, Jensen says, "Yeah, I guess."
"You've got water? And Advil or something?"
"Yes."
"All right, I'm gonna go then. Just don’t, like…drown in your own vomit or anything, okay?" The guy heads back for the hallway, hits the lights off, and says, "Good night," as he shuts the door.
Jensen flops down face-first onto his bed, and he's out within minutes.
* * * * *
Jensen manages to go a whole two weeks without making an idiot of himself like that again.
It's early for a Friday night, the second week of classes is behind him, and he's already drunk enough to be heading to bed. The stairs aren't any better this time, but they've become just another fact of life at this point. As Jensen passes through the third floor again, he thinks about taking a break - definitely checking the couch before he sits this time - but the guy's there again, asleep. His eyes are shut tightly and he's curled up into a ball under a blanket and with a pillow like he'd actually planned to spend the night on the sofa.
The guy is still just as attractive as Jensen thought before, though he looks, well, kind of adorable and insanely vulnerable the way he's sleeping, all curled in on himself. Jensen thinks about maybe trying touching him, just a little something innocent; the guy is good looking enough to risk a punch in the face if it doesn't work out. But then Jensen remembers how creepy that would be, and how staring at someone sleeping isn't much better, so instead he says, "Hey." The guy lets out a quiet little snore. "Hey." He pokes the guy in the thigh. "Wake up."
"Huh?" The guy blinks sleepily at Jensen, sits up, and then groans. "You again."
"Yes. And you're here again."
"Well, obviously. Is there a reason you woke me up?"
"You shouldn't fall asleep in the common room, y'know. Somebody'll draw on you."
"Draw on me?"
"That's what they always do to people who pass out places, right? Draw dicks on their faces with permanent markers."
"Okay, first, I didn't pass out; I'm nowhere near as drunk as you. Two, that wouldn't be that big a deal." He snorts. "I'm kinda used to having dick near my face."
"...What?"
"It was a joke. Not a very funny one. 'Cause I'm gay," the guy says.
"Oh. I'm Jensen."
The guy laughs and holds out his hand. "Jared." Jared - in his drunken state, Jensen thinks that’s a great name, and Jared is gay and also incredibly good looking, and he's shaking Jensen's hand. It might be the best night ever. Jared asks, "So was there a reason you woke me up? Besides worrying about the state of my face, I mean."
"Not really. Why're you sleeping in the common room?"
"Sexiled."
"That sucks."
"At least the couch is almost comfortable."
"No, it's not. It's an invention of Satan sent here to make us all miserable."
Jared shrugs. "I can sleep just about anywhere, so it doesn't really bother me. So, you gonna need me to drag you up to your room again?"
Jensen's pretty sure he goes red at how embarrassing the memory of last time is, and he shakes his head. "I'll be fine."
"If you're sure."
"I'll let you get back to sleep."
"Good night, Jensen."
"Good night," he replies as he heads for the stairs.
Jensen does make it to his room by himself, thankfully, and it isn't until he's suffering through a hangover the next morning that he realizes just how stupid he must've sounded the previous night. Being a drunken fool in front of a hot guy one time, that's bad. Doing it more than once, that's just a thousand times worse. Because this Jared guy is exactly his type, and amazingly enough is also gay, and if Jensen had been sober when they'd met, he would've asked Jared out immediately. But now Jensen's made one of the worst first impressions ever - the only way it could've been more horrible would be if he'd thrown up - and he's pretty sure there's little chance he can convince Jared that he's not that much of an idiot.
Even so, when he gets back from lunch in the cafeteria, he takes a few minutes to wander the third floor, planning out a dozen witty-sounding apologies for his behavior while he searches the nametags on the doors for any Jared. There's only one, and Jensen's about to knock, but that's when he notices there's a stolen Holiday Inn do not disturb sign on the handle, so he turns and continues on to his room, still mentally kicking himself.
* * * * *
It isn't until a Tuesday afternoon in early October that he sees Jared in the common room again, and this time he's completely and mercifully sober. Jared's bent over the battered table, thumbing through a hefty-looking textbook, tapping a highlighter against his thigh as he reads.
Before he can talk himself out of it, Jensen says, "Hey."
Jared looks up from his book. "Oh, it's you. Jensen, right?"
"Yeah. And you're Jared."
"Good to finally meet you when you're not drunk."
Jensen smiles self-deprecatingly and rubs at the back of his neck. "I never thanked you for putting up with me, did I?"
"Hey, it's no problem. I've dealt with a lot worse."
That isn't exactly a ringing endorsement, and Jensen cringes. "Really, man, I'm sorry. I'm not usually like that. I just have friends who like to ply me with alcohol way more often than I'd like."
"I know what you mean. Chad, my roommate? He thinks that it's a crime not to party Thursday through Sunday. He's always trying to drag me along and make me do shit that's kind of stupid."
"You said last time you were out here because he'd kicked you out of the room?"
"Yeah…he brings girls back a lot. He's kind of the biggest manwhore on campus."
"So you get stuck out here pretty regularly."
"Well, you expect it, right? Nightmare roommate, the first rite of passage for a college freshman."
"That's no excuse for him being an asshole."
"He's not really, not most of the time. We usually get along pretty well. He's not a bad guy. Really."
"You don't have a guy to bring back to the room, give him a taste of his own medicine, maybe?"
"Ugh, you remembered that? That's probably the stupidest way I've ever come out to someone." Jared laughs, and it's the most incredible thing Jensen thinks he's ever seen, the way Jared's face lights with it. It makes Jensen's stomach seem like it's doing gymnastics, makes him feel like he's a pre-teen with his first crush. He wants to see Jared laugh again, to make him happy like that again, and that, more than anything else, is a sign of just how far gone Jensen already is.
"So…" Jensen asks carefully, "…boyfriend? Any opportunities to lock Chad out?"
"No, not seeing anybody right now. And not really looking for anything either. Getting used to this college thing is hard enough without worrying about hookups."
And just like that, Jensen's last small spark of hope dies a sad and lonely death, because there's no point in even trying to ask Jared out now, not when he's made it clear he's not interested in anyone, let alone Jensen. "Yeah, I can understand that," he says, trying not to let his disappointment show. "Too bad your roommate doesn't see it that way."
"You don't know how much I wish."
"I think I can imagine. Makes me even more glad I've got a single."
"Lucky bastard. So, you're an upperclassman, then?"
"Senior, actually."
"You haven't taken Intro Biology, have you? 'Cause I've got a test on Thursday and I'm ready to throw this friggin' book out a window."
"You're in luck. I'm a bio major, actually. What're you having trouble with?"
Jared snorts. "Everything? Take a seat, man; this might take a while. I hope you've got time."
"I've got a coupla hours until my next class." Jensen pulls out a chair and sits. "Let's get started."
* * * * *
So he and Jared become friends, of a sort. Now that he knows how messed up Jared's living situation is, Jensen notices just how much time Jared spends in the common room. He studies there, fools around on his computer there, sleeps on the couch there more weekends than not. Jared eats and folds his laundry and writes papers at the common room table. The only time that's ever consistently safe for him to be in his room seems to be the late morning, between when Chad leaves for breakfast and returns. Jensen's heard - and lived - his share of bad roommate stories, but Jared's is probably the most ridiculous he's seen, and Jared's way too nice and likes the guy too much to ever make a big deal about it.
The only plus side to all this is that they usually end up hanging out whenever Jared's sexiled, and Jensen's kind of amazed at how well they click. It's easy, talking with Jared, joking around and getting to know each other and awkwardly gaping at how damned loud Chad is whenever he brings a girl back to the dorm. Jared's got a wacky, upbeat sense of humor that seems to involve a lot of flailing around weirdly, and while Jensen usually has no patience for such hyperactivity, with Jared it just works. He can put up with Jensen's sarcasm like no one else, and can actually pull Jensen out of his foulest temper with just a few words. They fit together like no friendship Jensen's had before.
So Jensen's warm and fuzzy feelings don't go away; in fact, they get worse. They're friends, and really, that's great, but it isn't enough, not by far, and Jensen isn't above daydreaming about an elusive someday when Jared might realize he's madly in love with Jensen, declare said love, and then drag Jensen off somewhere for happily-ever-after marathon sex. Jensen's quite painfully aware of how ridiculously besotted he is, thanks very much. Hell, he doesn't even mind how much his friends tease him for having a thing for a freshman.
It's a Thursday in mid-November, and Jensen is trudging up the stairs on his way back from class, pathetically trying to fool himself into believing that he's not hoping to run into Jared as he passes through the third floor. Which means he's completely preoccupied and doesn't watch where he's going until he almost runs smack into Jared near the top of the stairs.
Jared, who is apparently wearing nothing but a towel held tightly around his waist. His hair is wet, plastered against his head oddly and dripping water in slow trails down his chest. His chest, which is bare and wet and holy fuck, Jared's abs have to be the most amazing ones in all of existence. And then there's the towel, which Jensen can't forget about, because it's damned obvious that there's nothing under there, that it's only an easily dropped layer of terrycloth between Jensen and a completely naked Jared.
But then Jensen notices Jared's expression, and all those lustful thoughts aren't important anymore, because Jared should never look like this: a little annoyed and a lot embarrassed. "Hey, you okay?" Jensen asks.
"Chad was out and I went to grab a shower, and then I came back and…" Jared trails off and gestures towards the door where that damned hotel do not disturb sign is hanging again.
"Fucking hell. How long have you been stuck out here?"
"Like ten minutes so far. D'you think I could maybe wait in your room until he's finished? Standing out here in a towel really, really sucks."
"Of course."
They head up to Jensen's room, and once they're inside, Jensen rifles through his dresser for his loosest pair of boxers and a tee shirt, tossing them to Jared. "Here. So you don't have to hang onto that towel for dear life."
"Thanks, man."
Jensen turns to face the wall, and those dirty thoughts are back in a rush. He hears the towel drop to the floor, the soft sound of fabric moving as Jared pulls on the boxers and then the shirt, and Jensen desperately tries not to picture exactly what's going on behind him, how Jared must look.
"'K," Jared says when he's done, and Jensen can look again, and what he sees makes it difficult to breathe. It's worse than in the hallway now, because Jared's still wet and gorgeous, but now he's wearing Jensen's clothes, and it sends a guilty little thrill through Jensen to wonder if this is what he might look like the morning after. Jared doesn't seem to notice how Jensen's practically drooling, though, and he says, "Really, thanks again."
"Not a problem," Jensen mumbles.
"I'm gonna have to talk to him about this sometime, aren't I?"
"You should've done it months ago, Jared."
"It's just, I'm not a confrontational kind of guy. What'm I supposed to do, tell him to have less sex?" That expression's back, the one that brings all these absurd protective feelings bubbling up inside Jensen, and something just snaps.
"You know what? Enough of this shit. You wait here."
Before Jared can say anything, Jensen marches out of the room, down to the third floor, and to Jared's door. Chad's at the loud stage of things again, his moaning clearly audible even in the hallway, but Jensen doesn't pay attention to the noise or that stupid fucking sign. Instead, he bangs on the door, not letting up until the door is yanked open, revealing a very irate looking Chad wrapped in a sheet. Over Chad's shoulder, he can see a blonde girl mostly hiding under a blanket.
"What the fuck do you want?"
Loudly and with an evil grin, Jensen says, "Oh, I didn't realize you were with somebody. I guess that means your rash cleared up?" The girl gasps and Chad sputters, but Jensen keeps on smiling.
"Who are you?"
"Friend of Jared's. And you see, he really needs to get in the room right now, so it'd be great if you'd wrap this up in the next five minutes so he can get his stuff. And if you don't, I'll kick your ass." Jensen turns and heads back for the stairs. He calls over his shoulder, "Really. You've got five minutes."
When he comes downstairs again, this time with Jared in tow, there's no sign of Chad. Jared thanks him profusely, promises to have Jensen's clothes washed and back soon, but Jensen waves it off. Jared can thank him when he's got a more permanent solution to this problem. And Jensen might just have an answer.
* * * * *
In the end, it doesn't take much, just a few words to the sympathetic janitor, and a twenty dollar bill slipped to a teenage employee at the nearest hardware store. And then comes the part that's actually hard, the telling Jared part. Because maybe he'll think it's stupid, or too much and too close, or maybe he'll laugh it off like some kind of joke. And maybe Jared will realize what Jensen's really saying - he's so gone over Jared that he's stooping to sappy, almost-romantic gestures.
It's almost time for finals, and Jared's spending most of his time at the table, hunched over his class notes, and that's where Jensen goes when things are set, when he's ready to spring his surprise.
"Hey," Jared says when Jensen walks into the common room. He grins, and Jensen's heart pounds a little faster because he knows that smile is just for him, just because he came into the room.
"How's the studying going?"
"It's not too late to join a circus or something, right?"
"Yeah, you'd rock the trapeze. All that spandex and sequins? Totally you."
"Screw you."
"Right back at you." Jensen looks away, unable to really look at Jared as he starts, "So…there's something I wanna show you."
"Sure. What's up?"
"Just come upstairs."
Jensen heads back to his room, and Jared follows close behind. They get to the door, and Jensen has to pause and nervously wipe his hands on his jeans before he pushes it open and motions for Jared to go inside. Jared does, and he notices the changes to the room immediately.
"Why's there another bed in here?"
"Um, well, I was talking to Bob the other day, and he mentioned there were a couple of extra beds in the storage room downstairs, said it'd be okay if I took one. I thought maybe you should have something better than the couch to sleep on next time Chad does his thing. And I, uh, might've bribed a kid at Home Depot to make a copy of my room key. So you can let yourself in when I'm not around. If you need to." Jensen holds out the key even though he still can't look Jared in the eye.
"Oh, wow, Jensen..." Jared takes the key, looking at it with awe, like it's something incredibly marvelous.
Then Jared's leaning closer, bringing his hand up to cup Jensen's face, and Jensen's heart is thundering because he's sure this can't be happening. But then it does - Jared kisses him, warm and soft and wonderful, and Jensen kisses back, tentatively, with a desperate hope that his eagerness doesn't show. Because this - him and Jared - is exactly what he's spent a whole semester wanting and now he has it, maybe. He needs to know what this means, needs to be sure they're on the same page, but he can't pull back, not when he still doesn't know if he's got this for good.
But Jared does break the kiss, eventually, leaving Jensen a little breathless and dazed. He says, "So, I might've wanted to do that for a while now. I'm thinking you don't mind."
"Only that it took you so long," Jensen blurts.
Jared laughs and kisses him again, short and chaste this time. "You like me."
"I can't stand you."
"No you don't. You're letting me share your room. You got me a bed."
"No, I stole you a bed. Totally different."
"Completely." Jared smiles, but it can't mask the sudden unsure look in his eyes. "So, are we...?"
"I was kind of hoping you'd go out with me sometime. Gotta make sure you're a decent date before I go committing myself. Don't want a boyfriend who's a lousy date."
And just like that, Jared grins full-force, says, "Ha, just you wait. I'm gonna knock your socks off."
"Knock my socks off? Who the fuck even says that?"
"Keep talking like that and you're never getting laid."
"Okay, okay. Not talking anymore."
There are much better things to do with his mouth, anyway.
* * * * *
Jensen's on his way back in from his first final when he notices that Jared and Chad's door sits open for the first time all semester. Jared is sorting through his closet, haphazardly tossing clothes into a duffle on the floor when Jensen comes in, but he stops and grins when he notices Jensen standing at the doorway.
"So, Chad strike out?" Jensen asks. "Did he finally get slapped by every girl on campus?"
"Ha! No, he actually went to his final. Don't know how he's gonna pass considering he didn't go to a single class, but whatever. Figured it'd be a good time to move some of my stuff up to your room so I'm not stuck without clothes again. I mean, if it's okay with you."
"More than," Jensen answers, and leans up for a kiss, one just firm enough to promise more coming soon. He pulls back quickly, though, and says, "Hey, I got an idea. When's Chad gonna be back?"
"Uh, twenty minutes, maybe?"
"Where's that do not disturb sign?"
It takes Jared a fraction of a second to get what Jensen's planning, but when he does, a slow, mischievous smile spreads across his face. He grabs the sign from Chad's dresser, hangs it on the handle, and shuts the door. "Let's see how loud we can get."