(no subject)
[Filter: Gryffindor boys & Ethan Worthington]
Oi. Which of you wankers stole my fucking panty collection?! They're all fucking gone. Do you know how long it took me to steal all of those?! I had 12 different girls in there!
GIVE THEM BACK.
[/Filter]
So lately everyone has been sucking quite a lot. The Prefects all have sticks up their backsides, and the bullies have stopped shoving people's faces in toilets and have instead tried to act clever. My brother is normal again - I like him better drunk - and my other brother is even dustier than usual. I sneezed 12 times around him this morning, so I've decided that I'll be staying away from him until he's less musty.
I'm trying to think of things that will liven up the school, but so far the only thing that's come to mind involves dressing up in a silver suit and running around pretending to be one of those mad superheroes in those comic books that Jordan reads. I hate Muggle comic books, but Wizarding ones tend to be even worse. I've taken it upon myself to write the best comic book ever known to human kind, Muggle or Wizard.
Oh, right, and for all of those people that think I won't be amounting to anything after I graduate from Hogwarts, I would like you all to know that I have received a job at the Ministry! Yeah, that's right, obviously someone recognized Adam Worthington's amazing abilities of being amazing. Be jealous.
All the best,
Sir Adam M.X. Worthington, IV.