The Music Brings Us Together (16/?)
Title: The Music Brings Us Together
Chapter: 16/?
Pairing: Adam/Kris
Rating: R (For later chapters)
Summary: The behind-the-scenes story that we never saw, as I imagine it, anyways.
Beta: None. Until further notice, this story will be unbetaed, as I'm too impatient to wait for my beta to take weeks to send chapters back to me. Also, I apologize for how long it has taken to get this up. I had it written over a month ago, and finally got tired of waiting to get it back from my beta, hence why it is posted unbetaed. All mistakes are my own, yadda-yadda-yadda. :)
Disclamer: Unfortunately, I do not own Kris, Adam, or anyone else in this story. Nor do I own any of the songs, or anything recognizable from American Idol or Ford. I barely own the plotline, as its based on the show. Adam and Kris belong completely to themselves, and each other.
“Ready for that surprise?” Adam asked, coming up behind him when the make-up artist had walked away to take a phone call.
Kris looked at Adam in the mirror and smiled slightly. “Oh yeah. Almost forgot,” he lied. In all honesty, he’d completely forgotten abut Adam hiding the song he was doing all week. He was too wrapped up in making sure his own performance went off without a hitch. “So, will I like it?” he asked jokingly, and was slightly surprised when Adam shifted uncomfortably.
“Uh, maybe,” he muttered, his eyes dropping.
“So, why is this surprise such a big deal?” Kris pressed, now more curious about it.
Adam caught his eye in the mirror again, and a grin made its way to his face, though Kris could tell it was just a bit forced. “It’s not. I just uh, wanted to see if I could do a good job picking out a song without your help. Been a while since I’ve done that,” he added with a laugh.
“Yeah it has,” Kris agreed, deciding not to press the issue. He’d just hear the song, then decide if there was really something to discuss. Judging by the suit Adam was wearing, and the slicked-back hair, it as probably a slow song.
Adam left when one of the stagehands called him over. Not quite sure what to make of the conversation, Kris just mentally shook himself and let the make-up artist finish. He didn’t need to be worrying about Adam right now. He didn’t need to worry about Adam period, except for the elimination tomorrow. The thought made him almost laugh out loud, but he kept himself in check. Adam going home. Yeah, that’s going to happen, his mind supplied sarcastically.
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Shopping in the women’s department. Of all the nonsense comments Paula could’ve made, why that one? And of course Simon and Randy had to keep it as a running gag through the rest of the comments. Granted, though, Kris appreciated Simon’s sentiments about needing a translator. Maybe no one else quite understood the comment either, though Kris knew his luck wasn’t that good. What Kris did know was what was waiting for him backstage before he even walked back there. And damn did he dread walking back there!
Predictably, Adam’s arm was around his neck the moment he stepped back stage, and the rest of the idols were smirking at him, but Ali was the first to speak. “Oh honey, you should’ve told us you shop in the women’s department!” She said cheerfully, wrapping her arms around his waist.
“Yeah,” Adam chimed in after she pulled away. Kris closed his eyes. He’d been waiting for this one since the moment the words left Paula’s mouth. “We could’ve had a hell of a lot more fun at the mall!” The group roared with laughter at the comment, and Kris shoved Adam away halfheartedly. He tried to glare at Adam, but that stupid smirk made him smile against his will, and he shook his head, laughing a bit with the others.
It wasn’t too long before they cut to the commercial just before Adam’s performance. “You still not gonna tell me what song you’re singing?” Kris asked teasingly, knowing that Adam wouldn’t keep the secret this long only to tell him two minutes before he sang.
Predictably, Adam just grinned at him, though Kris noted it was rather uneasily. “Nope,” he said boldly.
“So why did you want to keep it a secret from me, anyways?” Kris asked nonchalantly, “It’s just a song.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Adam said quickly, “Just a song. Like I said I just wanted to pick a song and rehearse it on my own. Won’t have you in the recording studio with me later no matter how much I wish for it,” he added with a laugh.
Kris chuckled a bit and shook his head. “Very true,” he muttered, though he didn’t believe the excuse for song choice any more than Adam probably did. He gestured to where Ryan was attempting to get Adam’s attention, and watched as the older singer left to go out to the stage. Chewing his lip thoughtfully, Kris glanced back to where the rest of the contestants were watching the monitors. Kris turned instead to stand just inside the curtain of the stage, more curious than anything about Adam’s song choice, and preferring to watch it live instead of on the screen.
Blinking hard, Kris carefully ignored the way Adam pointed out that he chose a song he could connect to emotionally. That didn’t mean anything different than any of the other songs he’d done. Hell, he’d connected to ‘Black or white’ for one, and pretty much all of his songs. Of course, he was only picking out those words because he was searching for the reason Adam wouldn’t let him know what song it was, right? Right.
The entire internal battle raged and calmed within the span of abut three seconds, and when Kris tuned back in, he heard the name of the song Adam was singing. “If I Can’t Have You.” It didn’t mean anything. Didn’t mean a thing. The song choice didn’t mean a thing. The lyrics didn’t mean a thing. The look of emotion and vulnerability of Adam’s face as he sang didn’t mean a thing. And the way Kris’ heart beat faster than he thought it even could sure as hell didn’t mean a thing.
Kris’ body felt like it stayed frozen, listening to the song for hours, but in his mind, it was over in a split second. He hovered by the stage just long enough to hear Paula stuttering in a teary voice that Adam had ripped his heart out and left it on the stage, before turning and joining the group back. No one said anything to him, but Ali gave him a teary smile. Matt and Lil were watching the screen eagerly, along with Anoop. Danny looked like he was torn between tearing up at the emotional song, and criticizing Adam for changing his stage presence every single week.
When Adam came back stage, he was smiling, though Kris was pretty sure only he could tell it was a bit forced. That’s only because I’m his roommate. The fact that he could see things about Adam that others couldn’t was only because he was in closer contact with him than anyone else really was. It didn’t mean anything else. When he noticed that his hands were shaking, Kris shoved them deep into his pockets and carefully maneuvered his way to the other side of the group, nodding his agreement instead of voicing it as Ali and Matt complimented Adam on his performance.
After hours spent carefully avoiding Adam’s eyes for the rest of the night, Kris found himself pacing in their room while Adam washed his make-up off. What was he supposed to say? It wasn’t like the song meant anything, did it? Adam had just wanted to pick a song on his own, and not depend on Kris to help him with it, right?
“Hey,” Adam said, stepping out of the bathroom, his eyes watching Kris’ progress around the room curiously. Kris looked up at him, cinnamon eyes meeting sea blue. Who the hell was he kidding?
“Hey,” Kris breathed. He stopped his pacing and turned towards Adam. He licked his lips carefully and glanced down, unable to look Adam straight in the eye. “Um, your song tonight. It was, uh, really great.”
“Thanks,” Adam said simply, and Kris watched the shadows cause by the bathroom light and the clock shift as Adam moved towards his bed.
“Must’ve meant a lot to you,” Kris whispered after a moment, finally looking up. He watched the muscles in Adam’s back tense through the tight black t-shirt he was wearing, but the older man didn’t speak. “I mean, like Paula said. You put a lot of emotion into it,” he continued.
Adam laughed slightly, Kris knew it was forced, and turned to face him. “Well, I told you it was a surprise.”
Kris let the silence draw for a few seconds, considering his words carefully before he spoke again, “Did it, did it mean anything?”
Eyes cast to the side, Adam shrugged, “Not if you don’t want it to. Then it didn’t mean a thing.”
A deep breath filled Kris’ lungs as he considered the man before him, sizing him up. But somehow, Adam seemed so much smaller than he normally did. Than as the rest of the world saw him. His skin looked more pale without the make-up. His hair was damp and clinging to his face, only bringing out that contrast more. He chewed his bottom lip with a nervousness that the world couldn’t know he ever felt. But his eyes. His eyes held a vulnerability that even Kris hadn’t been sure he possessed.
Kris knew he was surrounded by a mine field now. Every step, every movement, every breath risked so much more than it had before. Maybe it had felt like this for Adam since the beginning. Maybe Kris had just blinded himself to it. Kris wanted desperately to call it all harmless. It was still harmless. But they were edging closer to that line. And whether it was into right or wrong, he wasn’t sure, and didn’t quite was to think about or even consider. Right now it was only about the leap of faith that brought them right to edge; an edge that would be so easy to free fall over.
Closing the distance between them, Kris barely registered the surprise on Adam’s face, before he placed a hand on the back of his neck and brought him forward into a searing kiss. Kris smiled against Adam’s lips as he felt arms circling his back. He broke the kiss just for a moment, just long enough to look into Adam’s eyes, his voice a whisper, “And what if I want it to mean something? What does it mean then?”
He didn’t wait for an answer, but crushed their lips together again. His toes protested as he pushed up against them to get impossibly closer to Adam. Kris almost laughed when he heard Adam’s gasp of surprise when he pressed his tongue against the older singer’s lips. Taking advantage of that, Kris let his tongue slowly explore Adam’s mouth. He could tell Adam got over his shock quickly when he felt Adam’s tongue battling for dominance, and a fast-paced rhythm was found.
Only panting breaths could be heard when they finally broke apart. Kris’s eyes never left Adam’s, and he smiled when he saw the familiar smirk across Adam’s lips. Adam leaned in one more time to press a soft, chaste kiss to his lips before pulling back again and whispering a single word, “Everything.”