Stargate -- "Someone to Watch Over Me"
slash_100, prompt 080: Redemption
big damn table
This story was written for nangi_akki, who won my first help_haiti fanfic auction. They donated $14.95 to UNICEF. The prompt was a post-Descension story that deals with the events in "Abyss", with a protective!Daniel/vulnerable!Jack flavor. I hope this fits the bill.
Many thanks to princessofg for the awesome beta.
It was a remnant of a memory coming back, he knew that, but that didn't make it any less overwhelming.
Someone to Watch Over Me | PG | 1809 words | complete
Daniel woke with a gasp from a dream of acid and knives, Escher-like rooms and questions he just couldn't answer. He focused on the ceiling, memorizing the tiny bubbles in the paint where the concrete hadn't quite poured smooth, willing his heart to stop hammering so hard. It was a remnant of a memory coming back, he knew that, but that didn't make it any less overwhelming.
And there was something different about it, something in the way the sensations came to him that told him it wasn't his memory. Something he'd witnessed, maybe, something that had happened when he'd been Ascended?
The telltale pounding behind his eyes started, and Daniel forced himself to think about something else. He'd already learned the hard way that pushing himself to remember would just make things worse. It would come back to him in its own time, whatever it was.
Daniel turned to look at the clock, groaning when he saw the time. 0358, but there was no way he was going to be able to go back to sleep now. Well, one of the benefits of living where he worked: he could head up to his lab until the commissary opened.
*
They were offworld the second time the memory hit him, and he was doubled over in pain when he came back to himself, Jack kneeling next to him with a worried look on his face. "I'm fine," Daniel tried to reassure him, but he could tell Jack didn't believe him. "Just a returning memory. Some of them are more...visceral than others."
"I thought you said you remembered everything," Jack said, his worry fading to suspicion, but at least he wasn't looking at Daniel like he was afraid the other man was going to keel over.
"I said I remembered enough," Daniel countered. "And I do. But things still come back to me occasionally, and sometimes they hurt."
Jack still looked unconvinced, but he stepped back, and Daniel let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Jack had been there-in the memory-looking haggard and more afraid than Daniel had ever seen him. He was sure it was a memory from when he was Ascended, now. Jack had been asking him to do something, and it felt like he was tearing himself in two when he’d been forced to deny him.
And the pain, the horrible pain. Had it been Jack's? But Daniel felt it, too. How was that possible?
Daniel glanced at Jack, who was walking the perimeter he'd set around Daniel's little dig site, checking in with Sam and Teal'c on the radio. He wanted to ask Jack, but stopped. Something told him that this was something Jack wasn’t going to want to remember.
Daniel was on his own to work this one out.
*
Daniel had been putting off reading the mission reports from the year he'd been gone, but every time more of the memory came back to him he became more desperate to discover what he'd missed. He confined his search to SG-1's reports. There wasn't enough time to read every report for every team, and if Jack had been there, there must be some record in SG-1's files, right? And even if Daniel's presence wasn't recorded, the military obsession with paperwork would work to his advantage. He had a feeling that he'd know it when he saw it.
With all the other projects he had, it took a few weeks before he found what he was looking for, and then it all clicked into place. Ba'al's fortress, watching helplessly as Jack suffered, unable to help. He had tried to convince Jack to Ascend-that wasn't in the mission report. He had been the one to give Teal'c the idea of setting the System Lords against the base.
All the anger came rushing back to him. And the guilt. It had been so hard to be there and just watch Jack suffer. Jack had been right: Daniel had had the ability to tear down the walls of Ba'al's prison and spread Ba'al's atoms to the wind, but he couldn't. And then hearing Jack's low opinion of himself had been like a punch to the gut.
He needed to talk to Jack about it, if nothing else then to assure him that he had in fact been there with him, not a hallucination. But it wasn't exactly everyday conversation.
He was mulling over how to bring it up when a knock jerked his attention back to the present. Jack was standing in the doorway, fist still resting on the frame. "Am I interrupting something?" he asked, with that smile that made Daniel's heart skip a beat.
Daniel felt himself blush. He wasn't sure if the horrible crush he had on Jack had been there before, or if it had come into being from learning Jack all over again, but it was very annoying at times. "No, just lost in thought," he managed to say, dropping the pencil he'd been fiddling with. "Did you need something? I'm not late for anything, am I?"
"No," Jack said, chuckling. "Just wanted say hi." He turned as if to leave, and then called back into the room. "You wouldn't be interested in coming over for pizza and beer tonight, would you?"
"Sure," Daniel said, too quickly. "I mean, what's the occasion?"
"Thought you might enjoy getting away from the base for a while," Jack said. "We used to hang out a lot," he added, and Daniel wasn't sure what to read into his tone.
"I remember," Daniel said, smiling at the memories. Those had been some of the first to come back, and he had been glad. "Tonight?"
"Sure," Jack said. He turned back and Daniel was treated to another one of those grins. "Be ready to leave at 1800. Wear civvies."
*
Daniel had been to Jack's place a handful of times since he'd come back, and every time he was struck by how at home he felt there. Safe, in a way he didn't understand. But, then again, it was Jack's place, and it really felt like Jack, so maybe it wasn't so strange after all.
He was perfectly happy to have Jack settle him in the corner of the couch-his corner, and Jack had smiled brightly when Daniel had sat there without prompting-with a beer and the promise of delivered pizza. Baseball on the television, but Daniel was watching Jack, enjoying the play of emotions on his face as Jack reacted to a good or bad play or snarked at the advertisements. The arrival of the pizza only deepened his good mood, and he was comfortably drowsing by the end of the game.
"So, what is it?" Jack asked, turning off the set and putting down the remote.
"Mm?" Daniel asked, trying to wake himself up. He was still getting used to being able to have half-conversations with Jack, but he felt like this one had started without him.
"What you've been remembering," Jack said, and Daniel blinked. "You've been doing this thing. You'll stare off into the distance for a minute or two and then shudder and keep going. And then today. You were totally zoned out; you were looking right at me for five minutes before I knocked."
"I remembered Ba'al torturing you," Daniel said, and then he wanted to kick himself. He'd been so worried about being careful, and then he'd just blurted it out.
Jack's face shut down. "I try not to."
"I was there," Daniel said softly. "I know you thought you were just imagining me, but I was there with you. Not like there was much I could do to help," he added bitterly.
"The Others," Jack said. The way he was staring straight ahead at the blank television screen was not reassuring Daniel at all.
"And Oma, to keep me from coming to their attention at all," Daniel said. "But I was the one that gave Teal'c the idea to feed the location to Yu.”
"So much for not interfering," Jack grumbled, but there was almost the hint of a smile around his mouth.
Daniel shrugged. "No one accused the Others of being consistent," he pointed out, and Jack did smile at that, the quirk of corner of his lips just visible. "I tried to take away some of your pain, just take the edge off when it was at its worst. That's what I was remembering. Experiencing your pain."
"I don't remember that," Jack said very quietly.
"I'm not surprised," Daniel said. "I couldn't do much, or else Ba'al would notice, so I waited until you were pretty out of it. I was also there when you came home. I don't know if you remember."
"That I do remember," Jack said, and Daniel desperately wanted to see Jack's face so he could tell what the other man was thinking. "It felt like you were watching over me. Corny, right?"
"That's exactly what I was doing," Daniel said, blushing. "And helping you through the sarcophagus withdrawal. Like you helped me. It was the least I could do. You're always the one who protects me, and the one time I'm in the situation to help you, I can't."
Jack turned to look at Daniel, and Daniel's breath caught in his throat at the depth of emotion in his face. It made him want to reach out and touch, but he'd never been comfortable being tactile with other people. But Jack seemed to read his mind as always, reaching out to rest a warm hand on Daniel's shoulder. "I thought I was imagining it." He looked like there was more he wanted to say, but wasn't sure how.
Daniel placed his hand over Jack's, and their fingers shifted and tangled. Daniel felt like the bottom of his stomach dropped out, looking at the sudden heat in Jack's eyes. "Is this something else I'm forgetting?" Daniel asked, barely above a whisper.
"No," Jack said. He turned on the couch to face Daniel.
Daniel glanced over Jack's face, not sure what he was looking for. But it was suddenly easy to reach up to cup the back of Jack's head, rubbing the tips of his fingers through the short bristles of Jack's hair. Jack made a choked sound in his throat, and then they were kissing, Jack's chapped lips against his own. It was a little awkward, pressed into the corner of the couch, but it was perfect.
They separated just as Daniel's lungs were starting to feel a little tight from the lack of air. Jack rested his forehead against Daniel's, his big warm hand cupping Daniel's jaw. "Hey," Daniel said breathlessly, and Jack smiled.
"Hey," Jack replied, and Daniel smiled stupidly at the absurdity of it. "I liked having you as my guardian angel, but I missed having you here."
Feedback is better than chocolate.
A/N: Spoilers through mid-season 7. Direct references to "Abyss".
big damn table
This story was written for nangi_akki, who won my first help_haiti fanfic auction. They donated $14.95 to UNICEF. The prompt was a post-Descension story that deals with the events in "Abyss", with a protective!Daniel/vulnerable!Jack flavor. I hope this fits the bill.
Many thanks to princessofg for the awesome beta.
It was a remnant of a memory coming back, he knew that, but that didn't make it any less overwhelming.
Someone to Watch Over Me | PG | 1809 words | complete
Daniel woke with a gasp from a dream of acid and knives, Escher-like rooms and questions he just couldn't answer. He focused on the ceiling, memorizing the tiny bubbles in the paint where the concrete hadn't quite poured smooth, willing his heart to stop hammering so hard. It was a remnant of a memory coming back, he knew that, but that didn't make it any less overwhelming.
And there was something different about it, something in the way the sensations came to him that told him it wasn't his memory. Something he'd witnessed, maybe, something that had happened when he'd been Ascended?
The telltale pounding behind his eyes started, and Daniel forced himself to think about something else. He'd already learned the hard way that pushing himself to remember would just make things worse. It would come back to him in its own time, whatever it was.
Daniel turned to look at the clock, groaning when he saw the time. 0358, but there was no way he was going to be able to go back to sleep now. Well, one of the benefits of living where he worked: he could head up to his lab until the commissary opened.
*
They were offworld the second time the memory hit him, and he was doubled over in pain when he came back to himself, Jack kneeling next to him with a worried look on his face. "I'm fine," Daniel tried to reassure him, but he could tell Jack didn't believe him. "Just a returning memory. Some of them are more...visceral than others."
"I thought you said you remembered everything," Jack said, his worry fading to suspicion, but at least he wasn't looking at Daniel like he was afraid the other man was going to keel over.
"I said I remembered enough," Daniel countered. "And I do. But things still come back to me occasionally, and sometimes they hurt."
Jack still looked unconvinced, but he stepped back, and Daniel let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Jack had been there-in the memory-looking haggard and more afraid than Daniel had ever seen him. He was sure it was a memory from when he was Ascended, now. Jack had been asking him to do something, and it felt like he was tearing himself in two when he’d been forced to deny him.
And the pain, the horrible pain. Had it been Jack's? But Daniel felt it, too. How was that possible?
Daniel glanced at Jack, who was walking the perimeter he'd set around Daniel's little dig site, checking in with Sam and Teal'c on the radio. He wanted to ask Jack, but stopped. Something told him that this was something Jack wasn’t going to want to remember.
Daniel was on his own to work this one out.
*
Daniel had been putting off reading the mission reports from the year he'd been gone, but every time more of the memory came back to him he became more desperate to discover what he'd missed. He confined his search to SG-1's reports. There wasn't enough time to read every report for every team, and if Jack had been there, there must be some record in SG-1's files, right? And even if Daniel's presence wasn't recorded, the military obsession with paperwork would work to his advantage. He had a feeling that he'd know it when he saw it.
With all the other projects he had, it took a few weeks before he found what he was looking for, and then it all clicked into place. Ba'al's fortress, watching helplessly as Jack suffered, unable to help. He had tried to convince Jack to Ascend-that wasn't in the mission report. He had been the one to give Teal'c the idea of setting the System Lords against the base.
All the anger came rushing back to him. And the guilt. It had been so hard to be there and just watch Jack suffer. Jack had been right: Daniel had had the ability to tear down the walls of Ba'al's prison and spread Ba'al's atoms to the wind, but he couldn't. And then hearing Jack's low opinion of himself had been like a punch to the gut.
He needed to talk to Jack about it, if nothing else then to assure him that he had in fact been there with him, not a hallucination. But it wasn't exactly everyday conversation.
He was mulling over how to bring it up when a knock jerked his attention back to the present. Jack was standing in the doorway, fist still resting on the frame. "Am I interrupting something?" he asked, with that smile that made Daniel's heart skip a beat.
Daniel felt himself blush. He wasn't sure if the horrible crush he had on Jack had been there before, or if it had come into being from learning Jack all over again, but it was very annoying at times. "No, just lost in thought," he managed to say, dropping the pencil he'd been fiddling with. "Did you need something? I'm not late for anything, am I?"
"No," Jack said, chuckling. "Just wanted say hi." He turned as if to leave, and then called back into the room. "You wouldn't be interested in coming over for pizza and beer tonight, would you?"
"Sure," Daniel said, too quickly. "I mean, what's the occasion?"
"Thought you might enjoy getting away from the base for a while," Jack said. "We used to hang out a lot," he added, and Daniel wasn't sure what to read into his tone.
"I remember," Daniel said, smiling at the memories. Those had been some of the first to come back, and he had been glad. "Tonight?"
"Sure," Jack said. He turned back and Daniel was treated to another one of those grins. "Be ready to leave at 1800. Wear civvies."
*
Daniel had been to Jack's place a handful of times since he'd come back, and every time he was struck by how at home he felt there. Safe, in a way he didn't understand. But, then again, it was Jack's place, and it really felt like Jack, so maybe it wasn't so strange after all.
He was perfectly happy to have Jack settle him in the corner of the couch-his corner, and Jack had smiled brightly when Daniel had sat there without prompting-with a beer and the promise of delivered pizza. Baseball on the television, but Daniel was watching Jack, enjoying the play of emotions on his face as Jack reacted to a good or bad play or snarked at the advertisements. The arrival of the pizza only deepened his good mood, and he was comfortably drowsing by the end of the game.
"So, what is it?" Jack asked, turning off the set and putting down the remote.
"Mm?" Daniel asked, trying to wake himself up. He was still getting used to being able to have half-conversations with Jack, but he felt like this one had started without him.
"What you've been remembering," Jack said, and Daniel blinked. "You've been doing this thing. You'll stare off into the distance for a minute or two and then shudder and keep going. And then today. You were totally zoned out; you were looking right at me for five minutes before I knocked."
"I remembered Ba'al torturing you," Daniel said, and then he wanted to kick himself. He'd been so worried about being careful, and then he'd just blurted it out.
Jack's face shut down. "I try not to."
"I was there," Daniel said softly. "I know you thought you were just imagining me, but I was there with you. Not like there was much I could do to help," he added bitterly.
"The Others," Jack said. The way he was staring straight ahead at the blank television screen was not reassuring Daniel at all.
"And Oma, to keep me from coming to their attention at all," Daniel said. "But I was the one that gave Teal'c the idea to feed the location to Yu.”
"So much for not interfering," Jack grumbled, but there was almost the hint of a smile around his mouth.
Daniel shrugged. "No one accused the Others of being consistent," he pointed out, and Jack did smile at that, the quirk of corner of his lips just visible. "I tried to take away some of your pain, just take the edge off when it was at its worst. That's what I was remembering. Experiencing your pain."
"I don't remember that," Jack said very quietly.
"I'm not surprised," Daniel said. "I couldn't do much, or else Ba'al would notice, so I waited until you were pretty out of it. I was also there when you came home. I don't know if you remember."
"That I do remember," Jack said, and Daniel desperately wanted to see Jack's face so he could tell what the other man was thinking. "It felt like you were watching over me. Corny, right?"
"That's exactly what I was doing," Daniel said, blushing. "And helping you through the sarcophagus withdrawal. Like you helped me. It was the least I could do. You're always the one who protects me, and the one time I'm in the situation to help you, I can't."
Jack turned to look at Daniel, and Daniel's breath caught in his throat at the depth of emotion in his face. It made him want to reach out and touch, but he'd never been comfortable being tactile with other people. But Jack seemed to read his mind as always, reaching out to rest a warm hand on Daniel's shoulder. "I thought I was imagining it." He looked like there was more he wanted to say, but wasn't sure how.
Daniel placed his hand over Jack's, and their fingers shifted and tangled. Daniel felt like the bottom of his stomach dropped out, looking at the sudden heat in Jack's eyes. "Is this something else I'm forgetting?" Daniel asked, barely above a whisper.
"No," Jack said. He turned on the couch to face Daniel.
Daniel glanced over Jack's face, not sure what he was looking for. But it was suddenly easy to reach up to cup the back of Jack's head, rubbing the tips of his fingers through the short bristles of Jack's hair. Jack made a choked sound in his throat, and then they were kissing, Jack's chapped lips against his own. It was a little awkward, pressed into the corner of the couch, but it was perfect.
They separated just as Daniel's lungs were starting to feel a little tight from the lack of air. Jack rested his forehead against Daniel's, his big warm hand cupping Daniel's jaw. "Hey," Daniel said breathlessly, and Jack smiled.
"Hey," Jack replied, and Daniel smiled stupidly at the absurdity of it. "I liked having you as my guardian angel, but I missed having you here."
Feedback is better than chocolate.
A/N: Spoilers through mid-season 7. Direct references to "Abyss".