The heat rushed into his mind, burning like a star.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Not Your Average Pon Farr Story | PG-13 | 1094 words | 4 of 4
Spock felt when Jim’s strength failed, when the walls came tumbling down. The heat rushed into his mind, burning like a star, though he knew what he was feeling paled in comparison to what Jim was experiencing. He felt the bond between them form and take hold, a ribbon of bright light connecting their minds, and lowered his hands from Jim’s face.
Jim made a low, growling sound in his throat, and wrapped his arms tightly around Spock, kissing him back. The kiss was harsh and bruising, but Spock gave in to it easily. They broke apart only when they needed air, but Jim buried his face in the crook of Spock’s neck, sniffing him. Spock found the motion oddly erotic.
Spock had expected Jim to be rough. The few times Pon Farr had been discussed during his childhood, it had always been implied that the sexual act would be harsh, even violent. Spock did not know if it was because Jim was Human, but Jim had gentle, running his hands over Spock's like it was something precious. Jim growled slightly when Spock reached up to try to touch back, and Spock subsided. He let Jim strip him out of his uniform shirts, gasping softly when Jim's feverish fingers danced over his bare skin. Jim had brought Spock to orgasm twice before he had even penetrated him, and even that was slow and deep, not the frantic rutting Spock had feared. And when Jim had orgasmed, it had exploded over Spock's mind, like the fireworks he had once seen on a visit to Earth, enchantingly beautiful.
When Jim rested, Spock reached for the pile of their discarded clothes, retrieving his communicator. "Engineer Scott," he said, once he had connected to the transporter room. "Two to beam directly to the captain's quarters. Please also contact Doctor McCoy and notify him that he may return to the ship at any time."
Spock pulled their clothes to him as the slip-slide ice water feeling of beaming shivered along his skin. The materialized on the floor in the office portion of the captain's cabin. Jim snuffled and curled tighter into Spock's side, and Spock found himself wrapping his arm tighter around the Human. The captain's Pon Farr was over, but it would still be some time until his system regained homeostasis. Spock would care for him until then...and after, if he was given the option.
Spock allowed their clothes and gear to fall to the deck, and then stood, lifting Jim in his arms. He carried him to the rear of the cabin, placing him on the bunk. He looked down at the curled figure, space-pale and still so young, and then slid into the bed beside him.
It would not do to abandon his new bondmate at this time, even if the bed was too small for two fully-grown men. This situation would need to be remedied.
Spock did not realize he had fallen asleep until he was awoken by a slight ticklish sensation against his side, over his heart. He opened his eyes, immediately meeting Jim's guilty gaze. "Didn't mean to wake you," Jim said, pulling away from Spock as if he had been burned.
"There is no need to apologize," Spock said. "All that I am is yours. That is the meaning of the bond we now share."
Jim blushed and looked away. "About that," he said, and Spock started to reach for him but stopped with Jim flinched. "I'm sorry about that. All of it. I didn't hurt you, did I?"
"No, Jim," Spock said. If he were prone to emotions--which he was not--he would have been concerned. "On the contrary, it was very pleasurable, moreso than I had been lead to believe."
Jim smiled wryly. "I'm glad." But then the smile slid from his face, and Spock could not read the emotion on his face. He considered using the bond to determine what Jim was feeling, but he decided that would be an intrusion at this early stage. "This bond...thing," Jim said. "Can it be broken?"
"Yes," Spock said slowly. "With the assistance from a healer, now that both our minds are stabilized, the bond could be broken. As you are psi null, you would have no lingering effects."
"And you?"
"I would return to my unbonded state," Spock said simply. Jim did not need to know how agonizing that would be. Having had a taste of what it would be to have Jim in his mind, Spock did not think he could let it go. "For what reason do you ask?"
"Oh, I just wanted to know if you had an out," Jim said. "I really appreciate what you did for me, but you don't need to stay tied to me now that this is over and all fixed."
"Jim, look at me," Spock said. "Jim," he added more firmly when Jim did not move. Finally, Spock took Jim's shoulders and turned him so he was facing Spock, then cupped Jim's jaw and lifted his chin so their eyes met. Jim's eyes were very blue, a fact Spock was already aware of, but that he still noticed every time. "I do not know what words will convince you that I wanted this."
Jim still looked unconvinced. Spock breathed an almost inaudible sigh, and closed his eyes, focusing on the bond between them. It was still light, but firmly rooted in both their minds. Mentally preparing himself, Spock threw open the metaphoric doors of his mind, letting all his thoughts flow down the bond to Jim. His pride in Jim's stellar intellect. The friendship he cherished, and his wish for something more. His fear that he was going to lose Jim to the curse of Vulcan biology, and the fear that he would lose him again to misunderstanding between them. His hope that Jim would understand, would reciprocate even a fraction of his esteem, his...love.
"Wow," Jim said softly, and then they were kissing, deep and slow, and Spock felt his toes curl in response to the sensation of Jim's lips against his own. "I wanted you forever," Jim said he pulled away to breathe. "You're so amazing, I never thought--"
"Never doubt, ashayam," Spock said, brushing his fingers over Jim's meld points, pleased when Jim shivered. "Parted from me and never parted."
"Touching and touched," Jim whispered. He wrapped his arms around Spock, pulling him down to the bed.
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