Another weekend of LARPing, another weekend where I was left sad and angry and disappointed. There were either issues with the character, or issues with the game, or both. ( Read more... )
That sounds like an awful experience but its cool to see you are able to write and talk about it. I have also experienced a similar collapse when going into a full weekend of gaming without a positive mindset and then faced with gaming that doesn't hit its marks. I think you did the right thing in calling it a day after sticking it out on Saturday.
I think your comment on one off vs long term gaming may be one worth exploring. You are much more at the mercy of the game in the former than the later, as you have less time to shape your experience. When combined with the proactivity that LARPing works best with, the shorter format is a hard ask, doubly so 6 times in a row in 48 hours.
I also think that the LARPing season has been beyond mad this year. From the outside, just hearing about what you guys go through exhausts me (on top of the dramatic drop in contact with a group of friends for three months). Maybe your experience at Hydra, being on the tail end of that season, is attributable in part to fatigue.
It probably didn't help that we hadn't seen the sun for over a week before the con. Today was the first time I felt a little bit cheerful as I was well hating on everything leading up to the weekend. Fortunately I get my happy buzz from being around friends so I was in good spirits come con time.
Thanks for taking the time to share, and for being honest about giving feedback. I know it feels like ragging on your friends, but it's an important part of the process. GMs and writers can't improve technique without getting feedback, even though it kinda sucks on both ends to have that kind of conversation. I dunno what the answer is, but I'm paying close attention to all the comments about this sort of thing - the best mistakes to learn from are someone elses, after all. Also, there is wrestling at my house most Tuesday nights. Greased up guys in their underpants ftw.
The best time I ever had at a Larp was when I was playing an NPC (Roger the second of Sicily) which I had weeks to research, and thus well before the game had a good idea about what he wanted, where he was going and who the threats were.
The second best was a Wellington Larp at capcon where I had my character a couple of weeks before the event and could get into the right headspace. I decided not long after that that I just suck at characters on the fly, and con-games RP in General wasn't really me.
Have you considered trying for crew roles? More warning, and a better idea of where you fit in might help you feel good about your RP?
Not to undermine the very reasonable points about game design, but the mindset with which you go into a game certainly makes a difference, in my experience. When you find yourself without much to do, the best way to have fun is often to go and insert yourself into a plot whether it's designed for you or not, and make stuff to do. Once you start feeling useless and unwanted, though, it's very hard to find the energy or motivation to do that (this was a big part of our Crucible issues, and anything that lasts a whole weekend makes it worse because after half a day of that feeling it's almost impossible). So, unfortunately, it seems to me that one is only in a frame of mind where one can go and find things to do when one is enjoying the game, and thus probably doesn't need to
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Yeah, and I think with big weekend games (as I've just said on Facebook), the build up can often be so draining of energy that the event itself suffers. I mean, I was trying to sort out costume pieces on the Friday. I felt rushed and frazzled for most of the day, which doesn't really help.
I certainly take some responsibility for not having a great time - they are my emotions that I'm feeling. But I also don't think it's all my fault. Too often in these situations I come away blaming myself...
When you find yourself without much to do, the best way to have fun is often to go and insert yourself into a plot whether it's designed for you or not, and make stuff to do
Just to repeat the comment I made on facebook - this is all good and tree-huggingly optimstic and fluffy and all that, but if it's gotten to that point there is a failure on the part of the GM that needs to be corrected in their design of the game. Expecting players to go hunting for their own fun spontaneously is putting the burden on them to do in real time what a designer has weeks of pre-game time to think about and get right.
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I think your comment on one off vs long term gaming may be one worth exploring. You are much more at the mercy of the game in the former than the later, as you have less time to shape your experience. When combined with the proactivity that LARPing works best with, the shorter format is a hard ask, doubly so 6 times in a row in 48 hours.
I also think that the LARPing season has been beyond mad this year. From the outside, just hearing about what you guys go through exhausts me (on top of the dramatic drop in contact with a group of friends for three months). Maybe your experience at Hydra, being on the tail end of that season, is attributable in part to fatigue.
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Definitely think there were warning signs in the build up to the weekend that I had a bout of depression on the horizon.
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I dunno what the answer is, but I'm paying close attention to all the comments about this sort of thing - the best mistakes to learn from are someone elses, after all.
Also, there is wrestling at my house most Tuesday nights. Greased up guys in their underpants ftw.
Reply
The second best was a Wellington Larp at capcon where I had my character a couple of weeks before the event and could get into the right headspace. I decided not long after that that I just suck at characters on the fly, and con-games RP in General wasn't really me.
Have you considered trying for crew roles? More warning, and a better idea of where you fit in might help you feel good about your RP?
Ulf
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I certainly take some responsibility for not having a great time - they are my emotions that I'm feeling. But I also don't think it's all my fault. Too often in these situations I come away blaming myself...
Reply
Just to repeat the comment I made on facebook - this is all good and tree-huggingly optimstic and fluffy and all that, but if it's gotten to that point there is a failure on the part of the GM that needs to be corrected in their design of the game. Expecting players to go hunting for their own fun spontaneously is putting the burden on them to do in real time what a designer has weeks of pre-game time to think about and get right.
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