smell of sunshine; jaeho
Smell of Sunshine
3,271 words; jaeho; PG-13
"Yunho." Jaejoong whispers so lowly that he knows that he probably can't be heard -- but it never hurts to hope. Maybe only Yunho can hear him. He braces himself behind the door of the closet, holding in his breath. He had been trying to sleep while Yunho had gone out ("Just have to pick up something", he says), but that was what seems like hours ago. There aren’t any secrets between them, there hadn't been since a few years ago -- when that had happened. He hears the creaking of the wood floor, something the two of them looked for in their temporary stay here so they could hear any intruders, any danger; though he barely hears it over the pounding of the blood in his ears.
The grip he has on his gun is too slippery. He won't be able to get a good shot if he needs to -- if it's one of them. He tries to steady his breathing, one of the things that gave them away last time, the thing that got them found and on the run again. Come on, Jaejoong, don't let them hear. Don't let them hear it. It's too dark to see anything clearly and he tries peaking through the slits in the closet door, seeing if he can recognize anything. Much to his disappointment there is nothing, just the pounding in his ears, the sweat in his palms, and the creaking of the wood.
He almost gasps when he hears it again, the shift in the weight on wood. His eyes move quickly along the floor, but the only thing moving is the shadow of the raindrops from outside. The loud boom of thunder outside is unexpected and his grip on the handle tightens to stop the shaking. It's all from the adrenaline from his fight or flight instinct. Jaejoong has chosen to fight; they got tired of running a long time ago. The rain comes down harder, the wind louder, and there's more noise going tip-tap-tip-tap-tap against the window.
A flash of lightning reveals to him a brief glance of a new shadow that is soon enough cloaked in darkness -- but Jaejoong has more than enough experience to recognize that it was a person that he saw.
A man.
Or that is the best he can hope for. Jaejoong watches carefully. He's not going to make the first move, not while his knee is still injured. Another flash of lightning reveals the figure moving, and Jaejoong moves quickly, adrenaline pumping and his mind not reading the risk of such a movement on his recent injury.
When lightning flashes again, there is a gun pointed to his forehead, and his pointed at his target’s. Relief washes over his entire body and he collapses on the floor, catching his breath.
"God Yunho. You could have at least answered."
"Answered? I must have missed out on the supersonic hearing part of the werewolf package.”
Jaejoong's grip around his gun loosens and he can feel the blood rushing back into his fingers. "Yunho, seriously. I almost shot silver into your head."
Yunho laughs, offers a hand which Jaejoong takes to pull himself back up. "I'm sure my brains would have been blown out with the bullet."
Wrapping his hands around Yunho's waist and leaning in, Jaejoong smirks in vain, "Shut up." He pulls Yunho closer (not without a small 'oomph' from the other man) and kisses him, soft and breathy. Yunho is the last person Jaejoong wants his silver bullets buried in.
"Well, seeing as how there's a gun to my ass, I’m guessing I have to." Yunho laughs against Jaejoong's lips and moves his hands off his waist.
Jaejoong closes his eyes, chuckles back softly, as Yunho lifts him up, carrying him to their bed. He buries his face into Yunho's neck, tired. He feels the rumble of Yunho's voice as he speaks, "Jaejoong, you scared the shit out of me, seriously. I glanced into the room and you weren't there. --"
"--and that automatically means that I couldn't be in the bathroom or the shower or something."
Yunho drops him onto the bed, takes his gun and puts in it the drawer of the nightstand and does the same with his, "Jaejoong, I don't know about you super-beautiful beings but people usually make noise during those activities."
Jaejoong laughs, pulling down the shades, and enveloping them in complete darkness. "You locked the door?"
"Yeah." Yunho runs his fingers through Jaejoong's hair, kisses his forehead, wishes they could live without fear. It's the same thing almost every night. Quiet, dead silence in an apartment, shades down, lights off, door locked. He closes his eyes, sees the lightning that flashes through the room trying to invade through his eyelids, hears the thunder two seconds later. Jaejoong sleeps close, humming occasionally. It drives Yunho mad.
But he holds Jaejoong close anyway, carefully, caressing his knee and falling asleep with him.
//
Jaejoong wakes up in cold sweat. He sits up, squeezing his eyes and trying in vain to will away the images from his nightmare. When he looks over, what he can make out from the darkness is that Yunho is still sound asleep, curled up on his side towards Jaejoong. He calms himself down so that he can finally hear the pounding of the rain over the pounding of his heart.
It happened a few years ago. Jaejoong hasn't lost track of time, just doesn't want to think about it or remember. He didn't believe it at first, was never one to believe in such things. He and Yunho lived in another city, Yunho in college, studying to be a prosecutor, and him working in a music store, waiting for one of his demos to come through. They met through a mutual friend, Yoochun, Yunho's roommate and Jaejoong's best friend.
It happened overnight. There was an outbreak of something in the university lab, something had leaked, escaped. At least that was what the rumors were, Jaejoong never found out what had actually happened. By the next day, the university was being evacuated but the city quarantined. Most people thought a virus had escaped, many rushing to their doctors for a vaccine -- not knowing that vaccines took months to build up immunity so these shots weren't going to protect them from what had leaked.
Chaos broke out. They hid out in Jaejoong's apartment, windows boarded and multiple locks installed and in use. The TV stations stopped broadcasting, but Yoochun was able to dig up an old radio and find a frequency from outside the city ("You can do that?" "Nah, I just hit it a few times and got lucky"). Fuzzy, cut words started piecing a story together. Jaejoong fell to the floor when it was revealed that the government had no intention of letting people out of the city until whatever it was that leaked was eliminated. Two days or so later, they said that the military was getting involved, actual cause of terror not identified. Another week later and Jaejoong's kitchen was running out of food, a rare occurrence that could show anyone something was definitely wrong.
Yunho was the one that had heard it. People outside the city had found out the government was withholding information -- probably trying to control further panic. "We can't stay here."
Yoochun was lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling. He obviously disagreed. "We could."
In the kitchen, Jaejoong shook his head. Yoochun was only saying that because he was strangely adept at adapting to new environments. The only things Yoochun needed were friends and food, and even the food part was a little iffy sometimes. "What would we do about food, Yoochun?"
"Cook rats."
"I don't have rats!"
"Jaejoong's rats are probably infected." Yunho turned the radio down, closing his eyes and trying to think.
"Babe, you're not helping." He went over to the small square table where Yunho was sitting, giving him a quick peck on the cheek before pulling out a chair a taking a seat next to him.
Yunho smiled back at him, a certain warmth in his eyes that Jaejoong remembered seeing before the whole crisis. Yunho broke eye contact, looking back down at his hands on the table, countenance serious.
"Tell me what you're thinking."
Yunho exhaled softly, "Jaejoong, I think we need to get out of this city." He continued when there was no answer, only warm hands covering his own. "We're not going to survive here, Jaejoong. Jae- I just can't-"
"Yeah I know."
Yoochun surprised them both by speaking up, "We know the city." Turning his head to face them, he paused, "We can probably find a way out."
Jaejoong slips his way back under the blanket, hiding himself from the stripes of moonlight invading the bedroom. He looks down at Yunho, trying to make out the most he can of the man's features in the dark. They have lived in the dark ever since then, ever since they ran from the city. He cups Yunho's face, fingers tracing bone, his thumb brushing the scar that ran through Yunho's eyelid.
They had packed what little they needed the night before. Yoochun listened to the radio for one last time ("The gov-ment says t- prob-em will - fixed s-n and tha- citi-ens nee- rem- calm.") The signal had been getting weaker and weaker by the day. Jaejoong peaked through the blinds, two fingers created an eye shaped opening. They were going to leave at sunset, blanketed by the night, aided by the full moon.
"Jaejoong, I don't think I'm going to ask why you have black lipstick." Yoochun walked out of Jaejoong's bathroom with two thick black lines drawn under his eyes and lipstick in his hand.
Jaejoong looked over in amusement. "It's Yunho's."
Yunho stepped out of the bedroom, dressed in all black, "Hey!"
Yoochun made his way over, drawing two stripes on Yunho's face before the man realized what was going on or could protest. "Jae-face, come here, it's your turn."
"Ohh no. I have no idea how old that is."
Yunho pouted in Jaejoong's general direction. "But Jaejoongggg, we won't match."
"I don't want to match with you two!"
"But what about me?"
"Ew, I don't want to be a disgusting couple."
"You guys already are a disgusting couple. I'm waiting for the matching mugs."
"Matching mugs?"
Yoochun put his fingers to his temples, rubbing circles and closing his eyes. "Don't worry Jaejoong; in my vision, Yunho has the pink one."
All Jaejoong remembers about that night is the running. They ran so much that night.
The streets were empty but the borders of the city were guarded, as they had suspected. The three of them turned quickly, trying to find lesser known roots out.
The bumped into it in an alley, and if had Jaejoong known what was going on, he might have laughed at the cliché. Yoochun took a few puffs from his inhaler, something in the air worsening his asthmatic symptoms. "It smells like-" His words were cut off as his eyes widened. Yunho and Jaejoong turned around to see what it was.
A werewolf.
They had decided to go out on the full moon. Jaejoong froze up, the half-man, half-wolf creature snarled, howling at the night sky as he transformed further. Then he attacked.
Yunho starts to stir and Jaejoong's hands still. He's puzzled at the way Yunho is always stiff when he wakes, expects the warmth of his hands to be familiar by now. But he suspects it's just because of their lifestyle right now. Fear is everywhere.
They're after the wolf from that night. The government covered up the incident quite well, blamed it on a mutation of a normally harmless virus within the city. They further explained that it probably had something to do with the biochemistry lab in the city university. But Jaejoong remembers what he had seen, knows that all of the explanations are lies. Moreover, he has proof of it. His fingers trail down to Yunho's shoulders and run over the bump of scar tissue there. Yunho was infected that night.
Jaejoong had woken up on the floor, thin, soft padding of some sort under him.
"-becomes a werewolf on the full moon."
He squeezed his eyes together, fading in and out of consciousness.
"-drink this to control it-"
"Yunho..."
He heard the faint sound of footsteps scrambling towards him. "Jaejoong."
"Yunho?"
"Y-yeah. Boojae, you okay?"
"Hot. Or cold. I don't know. Yoochun?"
He opened his eyes wider when Yunho didn’t answer right away. Yunho was beside him, legs folded under him and bottom lip caught between his teeth. There was an elderly woman behind him, peering down worriedly. "Jaejoong."
Jaejoong sat up, staying calm, "Where is Yoochun?"
"He's dead."
Jaejoong decides he can't fall asleep with these memories. He remembers spreading Yoochun's ashes on top of a mountain, drinking beer until he could see his old friend again. He remembers Yunho telling him he's had enough when Jaejoong felt like it wasn’t even close to enough. But what he remembers most is Yunho's tears, spilling in his own drunken state ("Jaejoong, look what you did.").
Ever since Yunho was infected, he’s been different. Jaejoong misses a certain softness that had been there before. Yunho is scared to hold him sometimes, even if Jaejoong pulls him close.
“It’s okay.” Jaejoong held him tight, whispering into his collarbone.
“Jaejoong, I just don’t want you hurt. Just in case.” Yunho spoke even if he knew Jaejoong was closing his eyes and trying to ignore him.
“I’ll protect myself.” Jaejoong kissed him in pale moonlight, smirking, “You just worry about loving me.”
He walks over to the small kitchen, grabs his mug to make himself some hot chocolate. They have matching mugs that fit together, halves of a heart that make a whole. Jaejoong has the blue one because Yoochun said that would happen. Yunho put up no fight in accepting the pink one ("I'm that manly." "Or that whipped by my fantastic-ness." Neither of them speaks about how they know it's to preserve the memory of Yoochun.) He walks back to bed, toes curling trying to keep warm from cold hardwood floor. Placing his mug on the nightstand, he climbs over to his spot, trying to get some sleep, slipping a leg between Yunho’s and cuddling close. Jaejoong knows he’ll need the sleep.
Tomorrow is a full moon.
//
They hunt on the nights of the full moon, even with Yunho infected. The healer from that night taught them how to make a potion to control his transformation. Jaejoong has the formula tucked away in his pocket always, just in case. Yunho downs the nasty stuff once every month, near the full moon. Jaejoong always makes faces at the dinner table, finishing his green tea.
It seems that the outbreak in the city had been an accident -- werewolves lay low wherever they go, making them difficult to track. Jaejoong and Yunho have been on this one’s tracks for a long time. Jaejoong checks his gun, six silver bullets, and tucks it into his utility belt. He grabs his two silver daggers, slipping them into their compartments on the side of his boots.
He straightens up, “Ready?”
Yunho steps out of the bathroom, toothbrush still in mouth, “Yes sir.” before walking back in. A few rinse and gargle sounds later, he comes back out, putting on his jacket, covering the protective gear under. He waits for Jaejoong at the door, smile warm and seemingly inappropriate for the situation. They kiss there, between their two different worlds.
//
Jaejoong knows that the last thing he’ll remember for a long time is the blood -- not the blood from his own leg, wound reopened, and not the blood from the werewolf, spilling onto the streets, washing away in the rainwater. It's Yunho’s blood he knows he’ll remember most: the taste of it in his mouth twice: at the moment when he came to and now when he kisses him, desperately trying to keep him alive; the stain of it: on his hands then, and on his teeth and skin when he sees himself later. Yunho has the nerve to smile at a time like this.
“Y-Yunho.” He cradles Yunho to his chest. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because it was going to be fixed.” Yunho mumbles his words, his arms feeling too heavy to lift and push himself up. So all he has is Jaejoong.
“It’s such a stupid secret.” Jaejoong whispers like he’s scared that noise will break whatever is holding Yunho’s soul to his body. He imagined a thin red, red string that leads all the way up to heaven, where the people with unstained hands go.
“You’re a pretty stupid guy.”
Jaejoong tells himself he isn’t going to cry. That’s not the last thing he wants Yunho to see. Instead he presses their foreheads together, “I love you, stupid.”
The rain water washes everything away.
//
Yunho unlocks his door quietly, expecting Jaejoong to already be calmed and asleep. It was almost a full moon and there was a chance that Jaejoong had transformed earlier than projected. He had been careful about slipping the potion into Jaejoong’s tea, and pretended to go out to get more of the stuff for himself. The apartment is masked in darkness and the only thing Yunho is hoping for is that he doesn’t have to kill Jaejoong tonight.
He moves with a flash of lightning, ready to pull his trigger when another flash reveals Jaejoong. A human Jaejoong.
"God Yunho. You could have at least answered."
//
“And what does that mean?” He looks beyond the bonfire between them, straight at Jaejoong’s nearly still body.
"He becomes a werewolf on the full moon."
“But, Jaejoong. He’ll never want to live like that.”
"He has to drink this to control it.” The old witch hands over a potion along with the recipe for it. “Have him drink it a week before the full moon or he will have to undergo the transformation. And there’s no telling how long it’ll last for him.”
"Yunho..." His head turns sharply at the voice, rushing over to Jaejoong’s side.
//
They decided to leave, knowing that neither of them could stay in one place for long.
“Yunho, let’s go.”
“Hey, hold on.” Yunho turns back, and the witch is already walking towards him.
“His curse will remain a secret?”
“Yes, ours.”
“There is no purpose for that.”
“I know him. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself.”
“That’s quite a burden.”
Yunho is sure she means loving Jaejoong, but he doesn’t ask. “Thank you.”
//
They’re going to get the wolf tonight. And they’ll break this damn curse and Jaejoong, Jaejoong will be okay again. Yunho forgets what it’s like not living in fear but he has a feeling it might feel a lot like waking up to Jaejoong’s face in the morning, scrunched and smushed against a pillow. With nothing but sunlight in the room.
//
Yunho knows something had gone wrong when Jaejoong collapses to the floor, starting his transformation. He looks over at the enemy, fangs bared as he as well watches with interest.
Jaejoong attacks him first.
//
Jaejoong kisses him, even though his mouth is leaking blood. ‘That’s gross’, he thinks and wonders why Jaejoong would do that.
And even though it’s raining, all he sees is light.
After the rain, the sun comes out.
And there is nothing but brightness: sunlight and Jaejoong.
3,271 words; jaeho; PG-13
"Yunho." Jaejoong whispers so lowly that he knows that he probably can't be heard -- but it never hurts to hope. Maybe only Yunho can hear him. He braces himself behind the door of the closet, holding in his breath. He had been trying to sleep while Yunho had gone out ("Just have to pick up something", he says), but that was what seems like hours ago. There aren’t any secrets between them, there hadn't been since a few years ago -- when that had happened. He hears the creaking of the wood floor, something the two of them looked for in their temporary stay here so they could hear any intruders, any danger; though he barely hears it over the pounding of the blood in his ears.
The grip he has on his gun is too slippery. He won't be able to get a good shot if he needs to -- if it's one of them. He tries to steady his breathing, one of the things that gave them away last time, the thing that got them found and on the run again. Come on, Jaejoong, don't let them hear. Don't let them hear it. It's too dark to see anything clearly and he tries peaking through the slits in the closet door, seeing if he can recognize anything. Much to his disappointment there is nothing, just the pounding in his ears, the sweat in his palms, and the creaking of the wood.
He almost gasps when he hears it again, the shift in the weight on wood. His eyes move quickly along the floor, but the only thing moving is the shadow of the raindrops from outside. The loud boom of thunder outside is unexpected and his grip on the handle tightens to stop the shaking. It's all from the adrenaline from his fight or flight instinct. Jaejoong has chosen to fight; they got tired of running a long time ago. The rain comes down harder, the wind louder, and there's more noise going tip-tap-tip-tap-tap against the window.
A flash of lightning reveals to him a brief glance of a new shadow that is soon enough cloaked in darkness -- but Jaejoong has more than enough experience to recognize that it was a person that he saw.
A man.
Or that is the best he can hope for. Jaejoong watches carefully. He's not going to make the first move, not while his knee is still injured. Another flash of lightning reveals the figure moving, and Jaejoong moves quickly, adrenaline pumping and his mind not reading the risk of such a movement on his recent injury.
When lightning flashes again, there is a gun pointed to his forehead, and his pointed at his target’s. Relief washes over his entire body and he collapses on the floor, catching his breath.
"God Yunho. You could have at least answered."
"Answered? I must have missed out on the supersonic hearing part of the werewolf package.”
Jaejoong's grip around his gun loosens and he can feel the blood rushing back into his fingers. "Yunho, seriously. I almost shot silver into your head."
Yunho laughs, offers a hand which Jaejoong takes to pull himself back up. "I'm sure my brains would have been blown out with the bullet."
Wrapping his hands around Yunho's waist and leaning in, Jaejoong smirks in vain, "Shut up." He pulls Yunho closer (not without a small 'oomph' from the other man) and kisses him, soft and breathy. Yunho is the last person Jaejoong wants his silver bullets buried in.
"Well, seeing as how there's a gun to my ass, I’m guessing I have to." Yunho laughs against Jaejoong's lips and moves his hands off his waist.
Jaejoong closes his eyes, chuckles back softly, as Yunho lifts him up, carrying him to their bed. He buries his face into Yunho's neck, tired. He feels the rumble of Yunho's voice as he speaks, "Jaejoong, you scared the shit out of me, seriously. I glanced into the room and you weren't there. --"
"--and that automatically means that I couldn't be in the bathroom or the shower or something."
Yunho drops him onto the bed, takes his gun and puts in it the drawer of the nightstand and does the same with his, "Jaejoong, I don't know about you super-beautiful beings but people usually make noise during those activities."
Jaejoong laughs, pulling down the shades, and enveloping them in complete darkness. "You locked the door?"
"Yeah." Yunho runs his fingers through Jaejoong's hair, kisses his forehead, wishes they could live without fear. It's the same thing almost every night. Quiet, dead silence in an apartment, shades down, lights off, door locked. He closes his eyes, sees the lightning that flashes through the room trying to invade through his eyelids, hears the thunder two seconds later. Jaejoong sleeps close, humming occasionally. It drives Yunho mad.
But he holds Jaejoong close anyway, carefully, caressing his knee and falling asleep with him.
//
Jaejoong wakes up in cold sweat. He sits up, squeezing his eyes and trying in vain to will away the images from his nightmare. When he looks over, what he can make out from the darkness is that Yunho is still sound asleep, curled up on his side towards Jaejoong. He calms himself down so that he can finally hear the pounding of the rain over the pounding of his heart.
It happened a few years ago. Jaejoong hasn't lost track of time, just doesn't want to think about it or remember. He didn't believe it at first, was never one to believe in such things. He and Yunho lived in another city, Yunho in college, studying to be a prosecutor, and him working in a music store, waiting for one of his demos to come through. They met through a mutual friend, Yoochun, Yunho's roommate and Jaejoong's best friend.
It happened overnight. There was an outbreak of something in the university lab, something had leaked, escaped. At least that was what the rumors were, Jaejoong never found out what had actually happened. By the next day, the university was being evacuated but the city quarantined. Most people thought a virus had escaped, many rushing to their doctors for a vaccine -- not knowing that vaccines took months to build up immunity so these shots weren't going to protect them from what had leaked.
Chaos broke out. They hid out in Jaejoong's apartment, windows boarded and multiple locks installed and in use. The TV stations stopped broadcasting, but Yoochun was able to dig up an old radio and find a frequency from outside the city ("You can do that?" "Nah, I just hit it a few times and got lucky"). Fuzzy, cut words started piecing a story together. Jaejoong fell to the floor when it was revealed that the government had no intention of letting people out of the city until whatever it was that leaked was eliminated. Two days or so later, they said that the military was getting involved, actual cause of terror not identified. Another week later and Jaejoong's kitchen was running out of food, a rare occurrence that could show anyone something was definitely wrong.
Yunho was the one that had heard it. People outside the city had found out the government was withholding information -- probably trying to control further panic. "We can't stay here."
Yoochun was lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling. He obviously disagreed. "We could."
In the kitchen, Jaejoong shook his head. Yoochun was only saying that because he was strangely adept at adapting to new environments. The only things Yoochun needed were friends and food, and even the food part was a little iffy sometimes. "What would we do about food, Yoochun?"
"Cook rats."
"I don't have rats!"
"Jaejoong's rats are probably infected." Yunho turned the radio down, closing his eyes and trying to think.
"Babe, you're not helping." He went over to the small square table where Yunho was sitting, giving him a quick peck on the cheek before pulling out a chair a taking a seat next to him.
Yunho smiled back at him, a certain warmth in his eyes that Jaejoong remembered seeing before the whole crisis. Yunho broke eye contact, looking back down at his hands on the table, countenance serious.
"Tell me what you're thinking."
Yunho exhaled softly, "Jaejoong, I think we need to get out of this city." He continued when there was no answer, only warm hands covering his own. "We're not going to survive here, Jaejoong. Jae- I just can't-"
"Yeah I know."
Yoochun surprised them both by speaking up, "We know the city." Turning his head to face them, he paused, "We can probably find a way out."
Jaejoong slips his way back under the blanket, hiding himself from the stripes of moonlight invading the bedroom. He looks down at Yunho, trying to make out the most he can of the man's features in the dark. They have lived in the dark ever since then, ever since they ran from the city. He cups Yunho's face, fingers tracing bone, his thumb brushing the scar that ran through Yunho's eyelid.
They had packed what little they needed the night before. Yoochun listened to the radio for one last time ("The gov-ment says t- prob-em will - fixed s-n and tha- citi-ens nee- rem- calm.") The signal had been getting weaker and weaker by the day. Jaejoong peaked through the blinds, two fingers created an eye shaped opening. They were going to leave at sunset, blanketed by the night, aided by the full moon.
"Jaejoong, I don't think I'm going to ask why you have black lipstick." Yoochun walked out of Jaejoong's bathroom with two thick black lines drawn under his eyes and lipstick in his hand.
Jaejoong looked over in amusement. "It's Yunho's."
Yunho stepped out of the bedroom, dressed in all black, "Hey!"
Yoochun made his way over, drawing two stripes on Yunho's face before the man realized what was going on or could protest. "Jae-face, come here, it's your turn."
"Ohh no. I have no idea how old that is."
Yunho pouted in Jaejoong's general direction. "But Jaejoongggg, we won't match."
"I don't want to match with you two!"
"But what about me?"
"Ew, I don't want to be a disgusting couple."
"You guys already are a disgusting couple. I'm waiting for the matching mugs."
"Matching mugs?"
Yoochun put his fingers to his temples, rubbing circles and closing his eyes. "Don't worry Jaejoong; in my vision, Yunho has the pink one."
All Jaejoong remembers about that night is the running. They ran so much that night.
The streets were empty but the borders of the city were guarded, as they had suspected. The three of them turned quickly, trying to find lesser known roots out.
The bumped into it in an alley, and if had Jaejoong known what was going on, he might have laughed at the cliché. Yoochun took a few puffs from his inhaler, something in the air worsening his asthmatic symptoms. "It smells like-" His words were cut off as his eyes widened. Yunho and Jaejoong turned around to see what it was.
A werewolf.
They had decided to go out on the full moon. Jaejoong froze up, the half-man, half-wolf creature snarled, howling at the night sky as he transformed further. Then he attacked.
Yunho starts to stir and Jaejoong's hands still. He's puzzled at the way Yunho is always stiff when he wakes, expects the warmth of his hands to be familiar by now. But he suspects it's just because of their lifestyle right now. Fear is everywhere.
They're after the wolf from that night. The government covered up the incident quite well, blamed it on a mutation of a normally harmless virus within the city. They further explained that it probably had something to do with the biochemistry lab in the city university. But Jaejoong remembers what he had seen, knows that all of the explanations are lies. Moreover, he has proof of it. His fingers trail down to Yunho's shoulders and run over the bump of scar tissue there. Yunho was infected that night.
Jaejoong had woken up on the floor, thin, soft padding of some sort under him.
"-becomes a werewolf on the full moon."
He squeezed his eyes together, fading in and out of consciousness.
"-drink this to control it-"
"Yunho..."
He heard the faint sound of footsteps scrambling towards him. "Jaejoong."
"Yunho?"
"Y-yeah. Boojae, you okay?"
"Hot. Or cold. I don't know. Yoochun?"
He opened his eyes wider when Yunho didn’t answer right away. Yunho was beside him, legs folded under him and bottom lip caught between his teeth. There was an elderly woman behind him, peering down worriedly. "Jaejoong."
Jaejoong sat up, staying calm, "Where is Yoochun?"
"He's dead."
Jaejoong decides he can't fall asleep with these memories. He remembers spreading Yoochun's ashes on top of a mountain, drinking beer until he could see his old friend again. He remembers Yunho telling him he's had enough when Jaejoong felt like it wasn’t even close to enough. But what he remembers most is Yunho's tears, spilling in his own drunken state ("Jaejoong, look what you did.").
Ever since Yunho was infected, he’s been different. Jaejoong misses a certain softness that had been there before. Yunho is scared to hold him sometimes, even if Jaejoong pulls him close.
“It’s okay.” Jaejoong held him tight, whispering into his collarbone.
“Jaejoong, I just don’t want you hurt. Just in case.” Yunho spoke even if he knew Jaejoong was closing his eyes and trying to ignore him.
“I’ll protect myself.” Jaejoong kissed him in pale moonlight, smirking, “You just worry about loving me.”
He walks over to the small kitchen, grabs his mug to make himself some hot chocolate. They have matching mugs that fit together, halves of a heart that make a whole. Jaejoong has the blue one because Yoochun said that would happen. Yunho put up no fight in accepting the pink one ("I'm that manly." "Or that whipped by my fantastic-ness." Neither of them speaks about how they know it's to preserve the memory of Yoochun.) He walks back to bed, toes curling trying to keep warm from cold hardwood floor. Placing his mug on the nightstand, he climbs over to his spot, trying to get some sleep, slipping a leg between Yunho’s and cuddling close. Jaejoong knows he’ll need the sleep.
Tomorrow is a full moon.
//
They hunt on the nights of the full moon, even with Yunho infected. The healer from that night taught them how to make a potion to control his transformation. Jaejoong has the formula tucked away in his pocket always, just in case. Yunho downs the nasty stuff once every month, near the full moon. Jaejoong always makes faces at the dinner table, finishing his green tea.
It seems that the outbreak in the city had been an accident -- werewolves lay low wherever they go, making them difficult to track. Jaejoong and Yunho have been on this one’s tracks for a long time. Jaejoong checks his gun, six silver bullets, and tucks it into his utility belt. He grabs his two silver daggers, slipping them into their compartments on the side of his boots.
He straightens up, “Ready?”
Yunho steps out of the bathroom, toothbrush still in mouth, “Yes sir.” before walking back in. A few rinse and gargle sounds later, he comes back out, putting on his jacket, covering the protective gear under. He waits for Jaejoong at the door, smile warm and seemingly inappropriate for the situation. They kiss there, between their two different worlds.
//
Jaejoong knows that the last thing he’ll remember for a long time is the blood -- not the blood from his own leg, wound reopened, and not the blood from the werewolf, spilling onto the streets, washing away in the rainwater. It's Yunho’s blood he knows he’ll remember most: the taste of it in his mouth twice: at the moment when he came to and now when he kisses him, desperately trying to keep him alive; the stain of it: on his hands then, and on his teeth and skin when he sees himself later. Yunho has the nerve to smile at a time like this.
“Y-Yunho.” He cradles Yunho to his chest. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because it was going to be fixed.” Yunho mumbles his words, his arms feeling too heavy to lift and push himself up. So all he has is Jaejoong.
“It’s such a stupid secret.” Jaejoong whispers like he’s scared that noise will break whatever is holding Yunho’s soul to his body. He imagined a thin red, red string that leads all the way up to heaven, where the people with unstained hands go.
“You’re a pretty stupid guy.”
Jaejoong tells himself he isn’t going to cry. That’s not the last thing he wants Yunho to see. Instead he presses their foreheads together, “I love you, stupid.”
The rain water washes everything away.
//
Yunho unlocks his door quietly, expecting Jaejoong to already be calmed and asleep. It was almost a full moon and there was a chance that Jaejoong had transformed earlier than projected. He had been careful about slipping the potion into Jaejoong’s tea, and pretended to go out to get more of the stuff for himself. The apartment is masked in darkness and the only thing Yunho is hoping for is that he doesn’t have to kill Jaejoong tonight.
He moves with a flash of lightning, ready to pull his trigger when another flash reveals Jaejoong. A human Jaejoong.
"God Yunho. You could have at least answered."
//
“And what does that mean?” He looks beyond the bonfire between them, straight at Jaejoong’s nearly still body.
"He becomes a werewolf on the full moon."
“But, Jaejoong. He’ll never want to live like that.”
"He has to drink this to control it.” The old witch hands over a potion along with the recipe for it. “Have him drink it a week before the full moon or he will have to undergo the transformation. And there’s no telling how long it’ll last for him.”
"Yunho..." His head turns sharply at the voice, rushing over to Jaejoong’s side.
//
They decided to leave, knowing that neither of them could stay in one place for long.
“Yunho, let’s go.”
“Hey, hold on.” Yunho turns back, and the witch is already walking towards him.
“His curse will remain a secret?”
“Yes, ours.”
“There is no purpose for that.”
“I know him. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself.”
“That’s quite a burden.”
Yunho is sure she means loving Jaejoong, but he doesn’t ask. “Thank you.”
//
They’re going to get the wolf tonight. And they’ll break this damn curse and Jaejoong, Jaejoong will be okay again. Yunho forgets what it’s like not living in fear but he has a feeling it might feel a lot like waking up to Jaejoong’s face in the morning, scrunched and smushed against a pillow. With nothing but sunlight in the room.
//
Yunho knows something had gone wrong when Jaejoong collapses to the floor, starting his transformation. He looks over at the enemy, fangs bared as he as well watches with interest.
Jaejoong attacks him first.
//
Jaejoong kisses him, even though his mouth is leaking blood. ‘That’s gross’, he thinks and wonders why Jaejoong would do that.
And even though it’s raining, all he sees is light.
After the rain, the sun comes out.
And there is nothing but brightness: sunlight and Jaejoong.