READ THIS!

[x0pinkxroses0x]

This entry is so long becuase i included a short story i just wrote for short fiction..seriously read it.  i think it came out pretty well. let me know what you think!

iloveyafuckahs

Let Me Get My Macaroni and Cheese…

I'm a firm believer in fate.  It's funny how life works out, how people meet, how people love.  How people hate.  Some

Comments

[sheekdothefreak]

I tend to critisize harshly, so it's nothing against you... but yeah.
I don't think it's all that great. It lacks detail, sentences are too short (but could be combined, so try using commas, colans, and semi-colans more), be careful of repetition+switching tenses, and the storyline could definitely be better.
Seems pretty beginner, not that I want to make myself sound high and mighty, just stating my opinions.

[x0pinkxroses0x]

thats the first story i've ever written and it is for short fiction class. i know its not great,i know its not good..but i do know its decent. i was just proud of myself..haha...critisize all you'd like, i take what ppl say and work with it.i trust what you have to say.. even though i dont know you i've read your entries and you seem like a very smart person. so thanks for your honesty =]

[sheekdothefreak]

Well thanks for not spazzing out on me like most people do :) It's just like, I like to encourage people, but I'd rather tell the truth first. Yes, I have without a doubt read much worse, of course. Also, if you want to improve your writing, it helps to read a lot. All of my writing teachers in America used to suggest that.