(no subject)
Hi…
It’s 3:52A.M., I’m laying in my bed and ever since a conversation I had earlier with someone I’ve been in one of those pondering moods…just can’t stop thinking. So figured since I don’t have internet connection in my room and therefore can’t ponder to someone via AIM…I’d write here and put it in the LJ eventually…
So I realized something today…
No matter how trustworthy someone is, if you’re not their primary confidante…and you tell them something slightly juicy with them swearing secrecy…they WILL tell at least 1 other person. It’s just human nature…I’m guilty of it too. I wonder if I’ll ever learn my lesson. I sure as hell hope sooo.
Anyway, my thoughts are aaalllllll over the place…I can’t stop thinking bout someone…not talking to him for this long, even online, is extremely weird and I almost feel like there’s a void without seeing and talking to him all the time. …aaand I guess that would be the definition of missing someone :-\ It’s weird…and I can’t help but wonder if my attachment is bad. I keep thinking that although it is impossible to take this thing to the next level, these feelings are normal for close friends…and I shouldn’t worry because our friendship is a mutual thing. It is okay to feel this way about someone who is just a friend right? …I really don’t want to have to talk myself out of this like you do when you like someone and find out they don’t feel the same way (and you convince yourself to stop feeling the way you do so you don’t get hurt)…ya know…b/c that’s not the case here…oh lordy this is confusing…I plan to call him tomorrow…and to tackle him as soon as I see him up in bing…
Idk…a bing friend was complaining today that she hasn’t been able to speak to a lot of the people from bing that she used to talk to daily like it’s a major issue in her life…I feel like we’re on vacation from that…and this is the way it’s supposed to be…we see all those people constantly…and more than slight communication now is enough. The overwhelming closeness that we live with them at school demands this break from them and it’s healthy. Maybe it’s just b/c I wish this vacation would include a vacation from her too, but no such luck…Our closeness probably would have lasted longer if she wasn’t so overwhelming…if I got a break everrr. If you go out every night with and spend some time almost everyday with someone and you haven’t been friends for that long, one is bound to get frustrated with and sick of the other. The guy I talked about in the last paragraph told her one day when she didn’t go out b/c I didn’t, that she should branch out and go out with other people. He was sooo right. I definitely did that, I couldn’t stand how at some point it was like I was doing something wrong if I was going out with other people. I couldn’t stand how there always has to be an ongoing AIM conversation with her…sometimes I just don’t feel like engaging in another dry conversation with her. Maybe if it wasn’t so constant, we’d have something to talk about. I couldn’t stand how all of my business was her business as well. I couldn’t stand how it was always, “What are we going to do tonight?” and it’s always nice to have that one person like that but idk…after some point it became too much…
So Saturday is Dan’s party at DNA in Queens. Outfit is complete…lots of new stuff :-D …the only thing that won’t be brand spankin new will be whatever jeans I wear hehe…I’m pretty excited to see lots of Bing people yay…Anyway, this, I thought, would be the highlight of this vacation. It should be an amazing time…but I won’t be disappointed in this vacation overall if the party isn’t all that i think it should be. The many trips to the gym with Tamara have been awesome…I love how we’re able to make something as simple as the gym into memorable experiences lol…once again it’s not an exciting story that we can tell people about but idk it doesn’t really matter…
How am I going to manage almost two weeeeeeeks here without ya Tamz! So many people are going back to school waaay before me…Andrew and Tina are both leaving the beginning of next week L…And idk I guess I’ve been anti-social b/c I don’t even know when other people are leaving hmm :-/ ..oh well.
What else…I think I’m doing something with Tina tomorrow! =) Yay! Really wanted to see her before she goes back to school soon…
And tomorrow evening I’m going with my mom to a “Spa Party” at one of her co-workers houses…whose daughter just happened to be my co-worker before they even knew each other…it should be interesting. Spa Party…that’s such a suburbanite thing to do…have a bunch of women gather in someone’s living room and try out different items, discuss them, and hopefully purchase something. Idk…I feel like it’s something you’d see on TV, something that simply serves the purpose to annoy the husbands…like in Married With Children or something lol…
I’m rambling…b/c I can’t fall asleep…and this entry or at least parts of it will def go in an lj cut.
So I have the Under the Cork Tree album on shuffled repeat right now. I’ve never actually liked every single song in an album, but I can listen to this whole thing and don’t have any urge to skip any of the songs…pretty cool, yo.
Guess I should attempt to sleep so I could wake up with enough time to do everything I’d like to do tomorrow. Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
...and to update on it a bit...
i DID get to see Tina Friday...we went for ice cream :)...twas fun...and worth annoying the madre to get to do...
The spa party thing was exactly as i thought it would be...maybe even a little more odd than i thought it would be...
ANNNDDD...DNA was suchhh a good time...
Mike...you were right, Paris Ave does only have 1 good song...b/c they played it...twice and that was IT...and the guy is sooooo ugly, was so disappointed by that haha...
Twas an amazing night...i'm so glad everything worked out with our plans...left there quite drunk and hence, quite happy :o)
...hopefully doing something with andrew today b/c he leaves tomorrow...
kbyeee.