Ah, mornings.

[xandalya]

Last night I had a dream about what I can only assume was some sort of apocalypse. It was, of course, brought on by humans; giant transport helicopters dropping stuff in alternating waves of what looked like some kind of crazy greenish liquidy-gas type thing, maybe really really heavy thick gas, and something that looked kind of like radioactive

Comments

[kwhyelp]

I don't think that there is anything wrong with wanting to be with somebody attractive. However, you have to keep its relative importance in mind. I think the people that really get into trouble here are the ones who ONLY look for very attractive mates. If that is your first priority, which most people would consider to be a pretty shallow attitude, then you are probably going to end up with a pretty shallow person, and in the end I don't think that is likely to work out well for anyone (look at most celebrity marriages). Has it ever happened to you that once you got to know someone, they became much more physically attractive in your eyes than they were before, or vice versa? I know it has to me.

Anyway, I don't think wanting to date someone attractive is anything at all to feel guilty about. But don't let it cloud your judgement with regards to other, more important things.

[xandalya]

I think that's a really fair way of approaching it.

I'm pretty convinced that at least in my subconscious, attractiveness is priority #1 as much as I'd like to believe otherwise. Of course, that's where I can take over and rule people out based on the list of actually important features

[rikkila]

It depends on your deffinition of fit.

See I am fit. I am no as fit as I would like to be.
I am actively working on being fit.
However most would not look at me and consider me fit.
I have a way to go, and my build wil always be a bit... thick?

So really it depends.

[xandalya]

That's sort of the point, though. My real problem is that I only seem to have limited control over what 'fit' will ever mean to me. I'm starting to really understand and feel various changes in my behaviour brought on what I can only assume are changes in my brain chemistry due to hormones and whatnot.

It really bothers me that I seem to have found something about myself over which I have no control whatsoever. I mean, outside of intentionally modifying my own chemistry through various available means, and I have no interest in doing that, really.

I'm sure I'll get over it at some point, but for now I'm just very, very uncomfortable about life in general.

Editor's note: please don't read anything dangerous into the phrase "uncomfortable about life". I just have some philisophical issues to iron out that will probably take a while.