lying beside you here in the dark...
I figured out what was wrong with my linkies. I'm all set on my layout, though I do wish my links were a bit darker. Oh well, I'm done fussing with it.
I went to update yesterday and the computer ate it, so I said screw it and here I am updating now. I had this huge entry written, too, just venting about everything. Here I go trying to vent
This time I've spent on the road with my brothers has given me an idea of what I want to do with myself. Exactly this. I want to do what my brothers are doing. I love the feeling I get when I pick up that guitar, strum a few chords, and it all comes together like it was nothing. Even my singing isn't that bad. It feels right to me...Like I'm supposed to do this.
Every time I look out at that audience at each venue, I get chills up and down my spin. It's amazing to see them singing along and dancing, and clapping their hands. I want that; I want to make people feel the way that Ike, Tay, and Zac do. I can't describe what this does to me. It's like you have to feel it to know....
Which brings me to another subject. I've noticed around me a lot of people are getting into these relationships. Obviously my brothers, but also friends back home, too, are starting to date. I realize I'm only 12, and that I have a lot of time ahead of me for dating and whatever comes along with that, but it just...I want to know, you know? What's it like to kiss someone, to get held tight by someone who isn't your mother hugging you goodbye? I've seen people do these things and I want to see what it's like.
Why can't I be older? Don't get me wrong I'm enjoying being 12; I'm old enough to appreciate what I'm able to do and young enough to enjoy it. But for jesh, I wish I were 15 or 16. Perhaps then people who stop treating me as if I were incapable of understanding and acting appropriately; maturely, to whatever action the situation demands. I can do that; I have been able to for a few years now.
It's like with Aunt Sally...no one ever told me what was going on because I'm "not old enough to fully comprehend what's going on." But I am. Aunt Sally has cancer, and she isn't going to survive it no matter what the doctors do. My cousins are going to be motherless, my uncle widowed. Our entire family is going to hurt for a long time and we're going to have to be there to support each other. What isn't to understand?
Gah...I don't know anymore. I just want to tell everyone to stop treating me like I'm 2. SO STOP!
Zac sucks. Yeah; you do.
I went to update yesterday and the computer ate it, so I said screw it and here I am updating now. I had this huge entry written, too, just venting about everything. Here I go trying to vent
This time I've spent on the road with my brothers has given me an idea of what I want to do with myself. Exactly this. I want to do what my brothers are doing. I love the feeling I get when I pick up that guitar, strum a few chords, and it all comes together like it was nothing. Even my singing isn't that bad. It feels right to me...Like I'm supposed to do this.
Every time I look out at that audience at each venue, I get chills up and down my spin. It's amazing to see them singing along and dancing, and clapping their hands. I want that; I want to make people feel the way that Ike, Tay, and Zac do. I can't describe what this does to me. It's like you have to feel it to know....
Which brings me to another subject. I've noticed around me a lot of people are getting into these relationships. Obviously my brothers, but also friends back home, too, are starting to date. I realize I'm only 12, and that I have a lot of time ahead of me for dating and whatever comes along with that, but it just...I want to know, you know? What's it like to kiss someone, to get held tight by someone who isn't your mother hugging you goodbye? I've seen people do these things and I want to see what it's like.
Why can't I be older? Don't get me wrong I'm enjoying being 12; I'm old enough to appreciate what I'm able to do and young enough to enjoy it. But for jesh, I wish I were 15 or 16. Perhaps then people who stop treating me as if I were incapable of understanding and acting appropriately; maturely, to whatever action the situation demands. I can do that; I have been able to for a few years now.
It's like with Aunt Sally...no one ever told me what was going on because I'm "not old enough to fully comprehend what's going on." But I am. Aunt Sally has cancer, and she isn't going to survive it no matter what the doctors do. My cousins are going to be motherless, my uncle widowed. Our entire family is going to hurt for a long time and we're going to have to be there to support each other. What isn't to understand?
Gah...I don't know anymore. I just want to tell everyone to stop treating me like I'm 2. SO STOP!
Zac sucks. Yeah; you do.