yeah, life is very confusing. i hate it becuase im never sure if whatim doing is right, or wheter im making the right decisions. i hate knowing that when i grow up, there is always going to be a what if. i wish there was somthing i can do to elimate that, but i guess i cant. i have to live life the way it is. today i found out what my true fear is, and i thought it was petty. its sad though, cuz im truly scared of it. shit, now that i think about it, im scared of 2 things....oh well, i guess thats what happens what i say im fearless. i rant and rave life is good, and im doing everything i can to get there, and now that im here, and im working to so hard, i wonder if its worth it. is it really worth it to live on top, to "live the american dream" or should i just settle for the really nice staircase with a loving family who appericates the clouds on a somwhat clear day?
I watched the Backstreet boys on Ellen Deginers or however you spell it today. It bought back memories. Im so scared for my brother to leave high school next week, and even more for when he moves out. I dont want him to leave. I think you are an amazing person and you seem like an awesome person from your entries. ♥
I'm extremely afraid of time, and getting old. Every moment that passes is another moment closer to getting old and dying. The idea of being old and knowing that there's more likely a chance that you can die at any moment terrifies me. Does that last sentence make sense? I'm also not very good at expressing my feelings/thoughts in words.
Someone on my friends list has decided to stop updating and is only using her private journal. I feel kind of left out, since I know her really well but only her "really close" friends can talk to her.
I sometimes want to hit the kids at my school for being so closeminded and cruel, I really do. It's ridiculous!
You probably know who this is, but I don't really care.
Over the past few years, I've fallen for every guy that I've opened up to(talked to about my problems, let them know the real me, stuff like that), and gotten hurt every time. So now I push away guys that don't already know because I'm afraid of being hurt, but I'm just hurting them because they think I don't trust them.
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I sometimes want to hit the kids at my school for being so closeminded and cruel, I really do. It's ridiculous!
You probably know who this is, but I don't really care.
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