I feel as though I'm getting depressed even though I have no real reason to be. It may just be the music though. Guess I should avoid band names like: Bitter, Bitter Weeks; Casiotone for the Painfully Alone; Low; Mayday. But it's the songs which bring about a strong sense of nostalgia that kill. So fuck music, I'll listen to Yip Yip ( Read more... )

looking out my window at the children playing in the street i've been detached

Wait! I just heard CocoRosie covering "Ohio" by Damien Jurado! What the Fuck!

This summer, I will make you mine. I will come sneak in from behind and grab you by the throat. I'll do whatever it takes. believe.you.me.

though, i suppose,',',.;...
you know what you need right now and i see that its not me and ive forced myself to realize that it may never be but when i make you smile things always look promising for a while

( Read more... )

I'm thinking about writing a livejournal entry, but I know that if I do, it will end up incoherent bullshit. So, instead, I'm going to watch the director commentary of Killer Klowns From Outer Space (why this dvd is in my house, i do not know, but thank god it's not Dig) and write some songs (for I am determined to use childrens toys to make music ( Read more... )

I've been plotting. Scheming against you. I've seen your face in fear. I've envisioned your agony. Played their telephone call with the operator in my head. I can hear the terror in their voices at the discovery. They are hysterical; not knowing if to weep, take action, or flee.
.
.
You, we shall pity. You, we shall curse.

today is my birthday.
.
.
.

It probably means nothing to test, .... I don't know. Why do you sleep so? Calculated for you, this entry was. No need to reply though. I know you mean little to none. Tact? What? I don't know. OK. make sense. Make sentence complete. soon.
Lunch with the Kaiser, I wish not to attend. Day with the beach, the bitch, and the ben, I desire greatly.

It's necessary to remain calm. Calm, meaning sane. Calm, meaning naive. Calm, meaning suppressed emotion. Calm, not meaning happy. Calm, not meaning manic. Calm, not meaning "I'm no longer bitter with these situations and the people I've decided to associate with."

- This is why it is first on the list.

It often doesn't work, whatever scheme you have of feeling better about the situations, the people, or life in general. Things remembered quickly turn to additional entropy to your bedroom floor. Unappreciated is the way we'll live. Low expectations. No expectations. Always suspect the worse in people. But don't become jaded to a stoic state. ( Read more... )