I don't know what to say. I realized today that I have problems. Yeah I know, I know. But I mean the problems that weigh on the shoulders and make things always difficult
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I'd find out why you can't/don't commit to the changes you prescribe for yourself. Change is tough, but worthwhile. Cultivate a self-esteem that comes from enjoying what you do in life. I'm kinda surprised you don't, because you seem singularly passionate about what you do--You really seem to dedicate yourself to your work and you're good at it. Some people can't cry and don't care. If you feel you can't cry but should, you should probably speak to someone professional about it. Walk in, make an appointment and stick to it. There's no shame in it and, at least, initially, your therapist should be able to walk you through what he does and what he can suggest. All you should need to do is react honestly and the two of you will work some surprising things out. You should never be afraid to look for solutions or help with those solutions. Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.
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Cultivate a self-esteem that comes from enjoying what you do in life. I'm kinda surprised you don't, because you seem singularly passionate about what you do--You really seem to dedicate yourself to your work and you're good at it.
Some people can't cry and don't care. If you feel you can't cry but should, you should probably speak to someone professional about it. Walk in, make an appointment and stick to it. There's no shame in it and, at least, initially, your therapist should be able to walk you through what he does and what he can suggest. All you should need to do is react honestly and the two of you will work some surprising things out. You should never be afraid to look for solutions or help with those solutions.
Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.
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