R.I.P.
Well I must say, my valentines day was probably worse than yours...
R.I.P. John A. Jasinski
November 4th, 1921 - February 14th, 2005 10:00 A.M.
well... the thing that made me happy was that i actually got a chance to say goodbye to him while i still could. Yesterday morning i got up and went to school all chipper and happy and handed out valentines and what not and went to latin and made david a valentine in latin to apologize for the night before
yeah... and then went to algebra, blah blah blah... and then theology. at 9:50 is when class starts and we pray at the beginning of class and it was about 9:55 when i asked everyone to pray for my grandpa and my exact words were "id like to pray that my grandpa has a good day" and little did i know that when i said that... he was taking his last couple of breathes with my dad and my grandma holding his hands. i went to english... and about halfway through the class coach jones said my mom was upstairs and came to get me. i went up stairs to see what was going on and i saw her and she said "you need to go get your stuff... grandpa passed and we need you to come home." i told her ok and held it in. i walked back down to class and fell down the stairs because i couldnt really feel my legs. i walked into the class crying and told mrs. merhar that i had to go home and i got my stuff and she walked me out into the hall and asked what happened so i told her. she told my class so that way no rumors would start. i went to the library to see mrs. scamardo to get my homework. i saw lianna and she gave me a long hug, im glad she was there. i went with my mom and we went home. i asked her what time he passed... she said around 10 and i thought about what time i did prayer... and i just broke down in the car. when we got there, i walked inside and into the room that grandpa was laying. as i walked in i felt like i had seen a ghost. he was so pale... his eyes were only half shut and his mouth was wide open... probably cuz he was gasping for his last little bit of air. my dad was standing in the room and i looked at my grandma and she waved her arms for me to by her. i hugged her and kissed her on the head and started crying. she said "he loved u, u were always his favorite! he always made sure to put the $20 on the table when he heard the lawn mower going" (i cut their lawn and they would pay me) and i just broke down and stared at his lifeless body. i told grandma how happy i was that i got to say goodbye because thats what i really wanted and she grabbed his arm from under the cover and said that his arm was still warm. i just had to walk out of the room i couldnt take it. my dad wasnt crying... it was soooo weird. he asked me to go get the camera so i ran across the street crying. i got on the computer beggin david to come back from his away because i really needed to talk to him! i went back across the street and took a picture of just him... and a pic of him and grandma and ran back home and put them on the computer so they wouldnt some how get deleted.
i made this pic a link... i wasnt sure if everyone wanted to see my dead grandfather but i wanted it in here. u dont have to click it
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i went back home and the ambulance came. i saw uncle stanley outside on his cell crying. the police came also and started questioning my parents and blah blah blah and i asked my mom to take me back to school cuz i didnt want to be at home. i got back to school and went in to study hall and started crying... knowing he'll never say hello or goodbye or call me sugarplum or say i love u or i love u to ever again. i brought a picture of my grandpa to look at for the rest of school time. everytime i looked at it i started to cry. in mrs. grahams room she started yelling at me and i started crying and then she told me how awful she felt for yelling. the rest of the day was just boring and i really didnt want to go home but i did get 7 carnations. i went to tumbling and cole was there and he let me cry on my shoulder... and everyone was looking but they can go fuck a cow! when i got home bryan called me. im glad i had someone to talk to. he always understands, hes such a great friend. i fell asleep doing my homework. when i got up this morning i put on all black made my hair really pretty... and drew a tear on my face with eyeliner *say what you want i dont give a fuck* i didnt cry once... until the middle of mass, when we sang this beautiful song. they mentioned my grandpa in the prayer and that made me cry to. then during theology we did the prayer for relatives or friends that have died. and i started crying. josh vale during intentions asked everyone to pray for me and my family and that was really touching. lunch was ok... and so was english studyhall biology world geo and choir. when i got home.. my dad asked me to go to grandmas to show her what i was wearing for grandpa. she loved it. i went to tumbling again and did my backhandspring on the cheese all by myself. it made me feel alittle better. when i got home i met my uncle john... i had met him before when i was like 5 but i didnt remember. it reallys sucks that i finally meet him at a time like this, but it was nice. we ate dinner at grandma's. we put a picture of grandpa on his chair *the chair he would always sit at* so it would seem like he was still there... but i knew he wasnt. he never would be again. and now im home... and crying so hard just from typing this ... valentines day will never be the same for me again...
R.I.P. Grandpa November 4th 1921 - February 14th 2005 10:00 A.M.
when i told my friend sami about the whole... me praying for him to have a good day the same time he died... she said, that it was like... i let him go, that he did have a good day because he went to heaven.
I miss him so much already... god its so lonely without him here... this monday ill have a little tribute to him because i cant type n e more