Fic: Unique Personality (River)
Title: Unique Personality
Fandom: Firefly
Characters: River
Word Count: 479
Rating: G
Summary: Sometimes she wondered whose voices she heard in her mind
Notes: Written on 5/1/10.
I’m hearing voices all around
I’m hearing voices calling out
What would they say?
What would it change?
- “Hearing Voices” by One Republic
Sometimes she wondered whose voices she heard in her mind. They were as clear as her own thoughts when she was lucid and sometimes they were stronger and stuck out more to her than any thought of hers ever did. Each thought had its own unique personality to it and she was curious. Were the personalities that of real people? Did she know the people or had she met them in passing, or were they just made-up? A figment of her imagination?
Confusion was a large part of her existence; the voices were a major part of that. They contradicted, they lied, the revealed truths to her that she shouldn’t ever know, and they screamed their pain at her. All of them. Contorting her reality and showing her a reality that wasn’t hers and never would be. She didn’t know them by name, but by the volume of their voice, the way they spoke to her and the way they affected her, and she didn’t know what was real.
Were they real? Was what they told her real? Could it be quantified or was it all lies?
She wondered if it made any difference. Was it the voices she heard that were important, or was it how she interpreted them? Was her reality the lie? Was everything she thought true an illusion, and the illusions all fake? Was Simon really her brother, and were they really onboard Firefly class spaceship, Serenity? Did Kaylee exist? Did Jayne? The preacher man? Zoe and Wash? Mal? Inara?
Or was she at the Alliance complex still, with their doctors toying around with her brain and making her believe things that weren’t? Hear things that did not exist? See things and feel them. Smell them. Was any of it real? She could very well be stuck in a lab somewhere with vivid hallucinations, an experiment of sorts that the Alliance had thought would be of use (for what purpose she did not know; they had made her a weapon so perhaps it was an extension of that, assuming of course that they had actually made her a weapon and that wasn’t all a dream).
She could only wonder and hope and analyse her situation. She could just live her life as it was -for what is living life but living whatever is dished out for you, in whatever form it may be?
Her world was one of uncertainties and irregularities and things that wouldn’t ever make complete sense (she had tried to understand but it did not compute). And one constant in that was the voices. She took solace in the fact that they kept her company and where all else failed, she had them to lean back on and to listen to. It didn’t really matter if she was the only one who could hear them. All that mattered was that they were.
fin.
Fandom: Firefly
Characters: River
Word Count: 479
Rating: G
Summary: Sometimes she wondered whose voices she heard in her mind
Notes: Written on 5/1/10.
I’m hearing voices all around
I’m hearing voices calling out
What would they say?
What would it change?
- “Hearing Voices” by One Republic
Sometimes she wondered whose voices she heard in her mind. They were as clear as her own thoughts when she was lucid and sometimes they were stronger and stuck out more to her than any thought of hers ever did. Each thought had its own unique personality to it and she was curious. Were the personalities that of real people? Did she know the people or had she met them in passing, or were they just made-up? A figment of her imagination?
Confusion was a large part of her existence; the voices were a major part of that. They contradicted, they lied, the revealed truths to her that she shouldn’t ever know, and they screamed their pain at her. All of them. Contorting her reality and showing her a reality that wasn’t hers and never would be. She didn’t know them by name, but by the volume of their voice, the way they spoke to her and the way they affected her, and she didn’t know what was real.
Were they real? Was what they told her real? Could it be quantified or was it all lies?
She wondered if it made any difference. Was it the voices she heard that were important, or was it how she interpreted them? Was her reality the lie? Was everything she thought true an illusion, and the illusions all fake? Was Simon really her brother, and were they really onboard Firefly class spaceship, Serenity? Did Kaylee exist? Did Jayne? The preacher man? Zoe and Wash? Mal? Inara?
Or was she at the Alliance complex still, with their doctors toying around with her brain and making her believe things that weren’t? Hear things that did not exist? See things and feel them. Smell them. Was any of it real? She could very well be stuck in a lab somewhere with vivid hallucinations, an experiment of sorts that the Alliance had thought would be of use (for what purpose she did not know; they had made her a weapon so perhaps it was an extension of that, assuming of course that they had actually made her a weapon and that wasn’t all a dream).
She could only wonder and hope and analyse her situation. She could just live her life as it was -for what is living life but living whatever is dished out for you, in whatever form it may be?
Her world was one of uncertainties and irregularities and things that wouldn’t ever make complete sense (she had tried to understand but it did not compute). And one constant in that was the voices. She took solace in the fact that they kept her company and where all else failed, she had them to lean back on and to listen to. It didn’t really matter if she was the only one who could hear them. All that mattered was that they were.
fin.