pretty boys still make pretty girls cry alot
laying awake watching mean girls & waiting in hopes to see you the next day. you tried your hardest. you ended up pissed off at yourself & pissed off at me for lieing to you about how long it'd take to get to my house & i apologized about five times & ended up crying myself to sleep that night. but it doesn't end. we didn't end.
so the next day, you ended up at my house...happy, in my arms & inlove. we held each other all day while you watched your damn football game...but i didn't mind. i wanted you to be entertained. i wanted you to feel comfortable at my house. in my family. & you were. & it was lovely. i still recall falling asleep on your chest & awaking to you screaming because ucla won & you apologizing over & over for waking my sound sleep.
i took you to the tire swing & watched as you pushed me as high as the sky. then we layed on the grass in the shade & you just sat there & stared at me. you pulled me closer & whispered into my lips, "god, your beautiful." & i couldn't believe such a beautiful creature belonged to me. how could someone so amazing belong to such a worthless person? god, he keeps me up in bed. then ashley found her way over to my house & inhaled all my cigarettes & when she wanted me to help her finish one off, i refused. he was glad i did because he keeps telling me i'm too pretty for smoking.
we found ourselves alone in kelly's room. it was dark. it was beautiful but i felt like such a slut. laying next to you on her bed waiting for you to just touch me anyway you longed. that's me, slutty unsure me. but you don't find me slutty at all. & i'm starting to think i'm so far from a slut it's not funny & i'm getting into right thinking....because i'm so far from a slut i can taste it.
we found ourselves trying to find our way back home at 10 p.m. I watched as you got so frustated you couldn't speak & whenever you looked at me, you were so scared. we had gotten lost. two teenagers trying to find our way back home...aww what a pretty sight. you held my hand tight & whenever some stranger looked at me you put your arm on me & made sure they knew i was with you. "i'm so sorry josh. it's all my fault." you kissed my head..."baby, no it's not. i just want to get home...i love you so much. but right now, i just want to get home." so we finally made it back to our destination & you hugged me so tight i swear i couldn't breath. it was lovely. your lovely. & i still recall everything that happened in that 11 hours i was with you. & i still recall our pinky promise in the middle of the street to never leave each other. & just to let you know...i think you've helped me realize...not all pretty boys plan to hurt me. you don't have a bad bone in your body & god, do i love you for it.