Preferences - Chapter 4
Here's chapter 4~~~~
I like what happens in this chapter, but I don't think I made it flow very well...hope you guys like it, though!
Preferences
Chapter 4: Progress
The next week passed by with a pretty regular routine. Yoochun and Junsu would walk to class together in the mornings, Yoochun would eat lunch in the cafeteria with Changmin, Yunho and Jaejoong, Yoochun would come home to Junsu in the evenings - sometimes bringing snacks - and then the two roommates would watch soccer together.
To Yoochun’s frustration, Junsu continued refusing to sit down. He also continued deflecting Yoochun’s questions about his personal life with silent treatment or his infuriatingly non-confrontational line, “I’d prefer not to.” Finally, Yoochun decided he’d had enough.
They were watching a soccer game together, as usual. The game was about twenty minutes in. Yoochun glanced back at Junsu for the umpteenth time and heaved a sigh. “That does it.”
He stood, grabbed Junsu’s wrist, and pulled the man to the front of the couch before Junsu could even process what was happening. Junsu’s eyes widened in surprise - was there a brief spark of fear there? - but he remained as silent as ever.
Yoochun sat, still holding Junsu by the wrist, and gestured to the empty spot with his free hand. “Sit.”
Junsu calmly attempted to uncurl Yoochun’s fingers from around his wrist. “I’d prefer not -”
“I’ll let go of you if you sit.” Yoochun interrupted.
Junsu stopped trying to loosen Yoochun’s grip and looked at him with blank, stoic eyes. Yoochun had the feeling that Junsu was mentally weighing his options. At last, Junsu lowered himself to sit tensely on the edge of the cushion, as far away from Yoochun as the couch would allow. Satisfied, Yoochun kept his promise and released his hold on Junsu’s wrist.
“Sorry,” he apologized, starting to feel guilty, “I just get a lonely sort of feeling when you stand back there. It’s like you’re here but I’m still alone, you know?”
Junsu looked away, wrapping his arms around himself.
Yoochun sighed. “Is it a personal space issue?” he asked, pushing himself up to perch on the arm of the couch, successfully creating a few more feet of space between himself and Junsu. “Better?”
Junsu gazed at him evenly for a few moments...then edged backwards into the far corner of the couch, pulling his feet up and hugging his knees tightly to his chest. Yoochun smiled warmly at Junsu and they returned to watching the game. At halftime, Yoochun slid off the arm of the couch to sit cross-legged on the cushion. Junsu’s eyes darted in his direction and he hugged his knees tighter to his chest...but he stayed put.
Yoochun mentally smiled to himself. Awww, so cuuute~
They went to bed after the game. Yoochun snuggled under his warm blankets and turned to look at Junsu, across the room. “Junsu? Thanks for sitting with me tonight. You don’t have to do it anymore if it makes you uncomfortable...but it made me really happy tonight.” He reached up and turned off the lamp by his bed, plunging the room into darkness. “Goodnight, Junsu.”
“............goodnight.” Junsu’s voice was so quiet, barely more than a whisper...but Yoochun heard him. He drifted off into dreams of a smiling Junsu. Oh, how he wished he could see the man smile for real.
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“What happened last night?” Jaejoong finally asked, having spent the past ten minutes staring intensely at Yoochun.
Yoochun blinked in confusion. “Hm? What do you mean?”
“You look really happy today. Way happier than normal. I just thought that maybe something good happened to you to make you look so insanely happy.” Jaejoong shrugged with a smile.
“Oh. I didn’t realize I was acting differently...” He turned to Changmin and Yunho. “Am I really acting that way?”
Changmin nodded, smirking at his obliviously giddy friend. Yunho nodded as well, trying very hard not to laugh.
Yoochun mentally squirmed under the intensity of his friends’ searching gazes. He laughed, trying to brush off his discomfort. “Quit staring at me! What’s so weird about me being happy?”
Jaejoong leaned across the table and gave Yoochun his best puppy eyes. “Teeellllll uuuusssss,” he pleaded, radiating cuteness. He did not fight fair. “Come on! What happened, Yoochun-aaaaah?”
Yunho wrapped his arm around Jaejoong’s shoulders and nuzzled against his neck affectionately. “You’re so nosy, Boo,” he chuckled, gently nipping at the shorter man’s ear.
Jaejoong giggled at the attention and turned to capture Yunho’s lips in a loving kiss. “I’m only nosy because I care, Yunnie.”
Yunho flashed an adorable grin. “I know.”
Jaejoong returned his attention to Yoochun. “Ok, start talking!”
“Well...I managed to get Junsu to sit with me.”
“Really?! That’s fantastic!!” Jaejoong beamed.
“Yeah, I guess so...I had to put him in a situation where he didn’t have much choice, though. I feel kind of bad about that.” He fidgeted in his seat, looking conflicted...caught between happiness and guilt.
“What kind of situation?” Yunho asked, looking curious.
“Well, it’s obvious he doesn’t like being in close contact with others. He doesn’t exactly try to hide it.” Yoochun looked guiltier than ever. “So I used that against him. While we were watching soccer, I grabbed his wrist and told him I’d only let go if he sat down.”
Changmin raised an eyebrow. “He hates contact with other people that much? I knew he was a bit antisocial but I didn’t think he was that bad. I figured he was just really awkward, socially.”
“That’s so sad,” Jaejoong said quietly, shaking his head. “What a lonely person.”
“Yeah...” Yoochun nodded, giving Jaejoong a reassuring smile, “But he stayed sitting for the rest of the game. He could have gotten up, but he didn’t.”
“What else happened?” asked Yunho.
Yoochun smirked at him. “Now who’s the nosy one?”
Yunho laughed, waving a hand dismissively. “Yeah, yeah, I’m a hypocrite. So what? Seriously, though, what else happened? That one thing doesn’t seem like enough to make you so giddy.”
“Giddy?!” Yoochun spluttered with indignation.
His three friends smirked at him, nodding.
“...I am not giddy.”
The others continued smirking at him, refusing to budge. At last, Yoochun gave in. “Fine. He also spoke to me.”
“So? He’s talked to you before, hasn’t he?” Changmin scoffed.
“Yeah, but only to say he’d prefer not to do something. Last night, he finally said something else.”
“Oh,” Changmin smiled, “Then congratulations.”
“Thanks!”
It wasn’t long before Yoochun and Jaejoong had to say their goodbyes and head for class. As they neared the classroom, Jaejoong pulled Yoochun aside. They waited for everyone else to enter the room - leaving the hallway deserted - before Jaejoong finally spoke.
“Yoochun-ah, be honest with me. What do you think of Junsu?”
Yoochun blinked at Jaejoong, confused. “What do you mean?”
“Do you like him?”
“Of course,” Yoochun smiled, “He’s distant and quiet, but he’s a really nice person even though he’s not very good at showing it. Why?”
Jaejoong shook his head. “That’s not what I mean. Do you like him? As more than a friend?”
“Do I...” Yoochun stammered, flustered. “I don’t...what?” He took a deep breath, pulling himself together. “What makes you think that?”
Jaejoong smiled. “Oh, lately you’ve just been reminding me of myself, back when I had a secret crush on Yunho. The slightest acknowledgement from him made me feel completely ecstatic, even if it was just something small like a smile. You seem to be having a similar response whenever Junsu acknowledges you in some way so I thought it was possible that you might actually like him. I was just curious. So...do you?”
“I...” Yoochun paused, still looking pretty flustered. “I don’t know,” he looked at Jaejoong helplessly. “Maybe. I don’t know.”
Jaejoong nodded, accepting his answer.
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Jaejoong’s words were still on Yoochun’s mind when he got back to his dorm room that night. Junsu was studying on his bed, as usual.
“Hey Junsu,” Yoochun said as he flopped on the couch, dropping his bag on the floor. He pulled out his homework assignment and tried to work on it, but he had severe difficulty concentrating and his mind soon began to wander.
What do I think of Junsu? He’s mysterious, so of course that makes him interesting...and I like interesting things so it makes sense that I’d be drawn to him, right? But that doesn’t explain why I felt so happy when he said “goodnight” to me. It’s not really a big deal. It’s one word. One simple little word. But still...even the memory of him saying it makes me smile and I end up feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. And he is pretty damn adorable. His awkwardness makes him even cuter...
Yoochun heaved a sigh and put his assignment away. He could already tell how pointless it would be to try finishing it when his thoughts were in such a tangled mess. He turned the TV and flipped through the channels until he found a soccer game.
As expected, Junsu came out to join him as soon as the game was on. He approached the couch, but stopped a few feet away, hesitating. After a few moments of deliberation, Junsu tentatively sat on the couch, in the corner opposite Yoochun, and hugged his knees to his chest like the night before.
Yoochun looked at Junsu in shock. “I told before...you don’t have to sit if it makes you uncomfortable. I won’t force you. You can stand if you really want to.” But even though he said otherwise, Yoochun really hoped that Junsu wouldn’t listen to him. For some reason he couldn’t explain, the thought of Junsu getting up made him feel incredibly sad.
Junsu shifted his gaze from the game to his knees. “...I’d...prefer not to...” he replied in a small voice.
Yoochun felt a grin spreading across his face; he turned away, hoping Junsu didn’t notice. “Ok.”
I think Jaejoong might be right...crap. Looks like I’ve just guaranteed myself a broken heart in the future.
After the game ended, Yoochun turned the TV off and gave his shoulders a brief stretch. He glanced at his quiet roommate as he got off the couch, expecting Junsu to follow him like always...but Junsu was fast asleep. He was sitting in his usual curled up position, resting his cheek on his knees. Yoochun felt his heart skip a beat as he looked at Junsu; his arms were folded, tucked between his chest and legs, and his face looked so relaxed and peaceful that the sight of it nearly left Yoochun breathless. His thick lashes traced delicate shadows across his cheeks. Yoochun had never seen the stoic man look so innocent and vulnerable before. It took all his willpower to fight back a sudden, spontaneous urge to kiss the unsuspecting beauty right then and there.
Bad idea...
“Junsu...” he called gently.
Junsu’s eyes fluttered open slowly; his gaze was bleary and unfocused, his mind still fogged with sleep.
“Junsu, wake up. The game’s over...” He reached out to rest a hand on the sleepy man’s shoulder.
Junsu’s eyes snapped open and he jerked away from Yoochun’s touch as if he had been burned. Yoochun flinched at the look Junsu gave him: there was fear in his eyes for a moment before he managed to mask it with a blank expression.
Yoochun took a step back. “Sorry...” He turned away quickly, trying to hide the sadness in his own eyes. He climbed into bed and waited for Junsu to do the same before turning off the light. The strained atmosphere in the room was killing him...he wanted to say something to break the tension, but nothing came to mind except..
“...goodnight, Junsu.”
He felt misery consume him when Junsu remained silent.
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Yoochun and Junsu walked to class the next morning in complete silence. Yoochun was wracking his brain, trying to think of something to say that might break, or at least ease, the unbearable tension...but once again, nothing came to mind.
Changmin kept looking at Yoochun and Junsu out of the corner of his eye during their class together. He could tell something was wrong but had no idea what it could possibly be...and he wasn’t about to ask them about it, either. He had a feeling that whatever was going on, it wasn’t his place to interfere. He just hoped they’d resolve their differences quickly, whatever they might be.
Yoochun had severe difficulty focusing on the lesson and hardly managed to write any of the notes. As soon as the class was over, Junsu stuffed his books into his bag and hurried out of the room. Yoochun put his things away more slowly, heaving a depressed sigh. He waved goodbye to Changmin and headed in the direction of his next class.
He stopped suddenly. His phone was ringing. He fished it out of his pocket and checked the caller ID - an unknown number. Curious, he flipped it open.
“Hello?” His eyes widened as the caller spoke. “She what? Is she alright?” He nodded at the caller’s response. “I’m on my way.”
Yoochun hung up, slipped his phone back into his pocket, and sprinted back to his dorm room to grab his jacket. He quickly made sure that he also had his wallet and keys with him before locking the door on his way out. In no time, he had left the college campus entirely and was hurrying to the nearest train station.