LJ Idol Season 11 Week 2: Living Rent Free In Your Head

[xlovebecomesher]

"How long have you been living like this?" The therapist asked gently, pausing in her writing.

Diana slouched in the pink, fuzzy chair staring at her nails. If she answered the questions honestly and voiced what she never said before, does that make her thoughts true? Diana bit her nail, chipping the nail polish. She wondered if biting her nails had

Comments

[nikkiii_brown]

A very well written and informative entry. Thank you for sharing!

[xlovebecomesher]

Thank you for reading!

[karmasoup]

OCD is a harsh taskmaster, and no joke. Good presentation.

[xlovebecomesher]

It is awful. Thank you for reading :)

[ellison]

Yes, the first time I ever heard of Pure O OCD was baffling and amazing for me. It really helped me be able to process that I still had OCD, and just had mental compulsions of replaying, revisiting, re-wondering about everything, "testing" to see if I really felt that way by imagining the intrusive thought scenarios all over again, wondering what was wrong with me. YUP. Omg. When I first had it, it was hand washing, but later, was just all mental stuff. OCD is a giant bastard to live with, but I try to see it as a panicky toddler, or better, a frantic scared puppy. The scared little monster/puppy/etc will be like AAAH you had a thought about stabbing that person, does that mean you WANT to stab that person, are we a murderer?!?!!? And I have to be like hush now, brain, it's all good, it was just an intrusive thought. Bleargh.

So yes, Pure O OCD has been helpful to know about. You did a good job describing it.

[xlovebecomesher]

replaying, revisiting, re-wondering about everything, "testing" to see if I really felt that way by imagining the intrusive thought scenarios all over again, wondering what was wrong with me.

This describes me perfectly!

OCD is an awful bastard :(

Thank you for reading!

[d0gs]

One of my mum;s closest friends deals with pure OCD and it is really challenging for him. I myself have PTSD and there are a lot of similarities re the intrusive thoughts. It can be so exhausting D:

[xlovebecomesher]

It is exhausting :( I'm sorry to hear about your mom's close friend and that you struggle with PTSD :( I'm learning now that there's a lot of similarities with OCD and PTSD.

[pixiebelle]

As someone with Pure OCD, you captured it perfectly. I could relate to so much of her story. It’s rare to find stories where people get it right. But you did.

I didn’t know you had it too. It was so scary growing up, I just assumed I was crazy. I never told anyone growing up and only recently started talking about.

[xlovebecomesher]

I didn't know you have it either. The story is everything I've struggled with in a simple nutshell. I always thought I was crazy too and if I spoke about my thoughts, people would want to lock me up- it wasn't until my 20s where I learned about pure OCD but there's very few people in my real life who actually know I struggle with it and know about my thoughts.

[pixiebelle]

Yeah, I just started talking about it, but mostly in private places still. Growing up, I feared if I told anyone, I’d be locked away. My intrusive thoughts are terrifying and upset me greatly. I first learned about it from a Cracked article actually. Someone wrote about their experiences and I was like, that’s me.

[xlovebecomesher]

I understand the terrifying thoughts *hugs tightly*