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Apr 05, 2010 02:24

I hate how people I don't even know can make me feel so depressed and worthless. They don't have to even say or do anything at all. I hate being so insecure but don't know how to be any other way.

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xsanti April 6 2010, 09:40:27 UTC
I am constantly frustrating myself because I ruin things (events, birthdays, holidays etc)with my own negative commentary inside my head. It's usually in regard to my weight/appearance. I compare myself with every girl there, make myself depressed and ruin the day/night. it's been a problem for a long time but i just can't seem to beat it. it's so exhausting. :(

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xsanti April 6 2010, 10:15:48 UTC
yes. it's a long process. i understand that, i just wish the people close to me did. i feel as though they expect me to snap my fingers and make all the sadness and insecurities go away.

you're right. it's not worth it, at all! i think this is why i get so frustrated with myself. i let myself believe in lies. it doesn't actually make any sense at all. i am determined to find a better way.

i'm really sorry if any of what i've been saying is hard to follow. i'm really scattered from being awake two days straight. -.-

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